--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Lovers were not, Marina, are not…" description: "\"“Lovers were not, Marina, are not permitted to know destruction so deeply. Must be as if they were new. Only their grave is old, only it ponders and da..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bcc/rainer-maria-rilke-193_love_lovers-were-not-marina-are-not-permitted_2054567.jpg" --- # Lovers were not, Marina, are not permitted to know… ![“Lovers were not, Marina, are not permitted to know destruction so deeply. Must be as if they were new. Only their grave is old, only it ponders and darkens under the sobbing tree, remembering all that has been. Only their grave collapses; they are supple as reeds; what bends them too far, rounds…” quote by Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bcc/rainer-maria-rilke-193_love_lovers-were-not-marina-are-not-permitted_2054567.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bcc/rainer-maria-rilke-193_love_lovers-were-not-marina-are-not-permitted_2054567.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bcc/rainer-maria-rilke-193_love_lovers-were-not-marina-are-not-permitted_2054567.jpg) > ““Lovers were not, Marina, are not permitted to know destruction so deeply. Must be as if they were new. Only their grave is old, only it ponders and darkens under the sobbing tree, remembering all that has been. Only their grave collapses; they are supple as reeds; what bends them too far, rounds them into rich garlands. How they blow about in the May wind! From the midst of the Ever, in which you breathe and surmise, the moment has shut them out. (Oh how I understand you, female flower on the same imperishable stalk. How wildly I scatter myself into the night air that in a moment will touch you.)…” ―from Elegy: to Marina Tsvetayeva-Efron”” [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Love is fragile, needing renewal; deep pain is avoided by staying innocent and fresh. **In simple terms:** Love stays fresh to avoid deep pain. Key Takeaway Protect love by keeping it light. Themes love fragility renewal pain innocence Mood melancholic reflective Type poetic literary When to use this quote - relationships - grief processing - creative writing - personal reflection Key Concepts existentialism romanticism impermanence Questions to Reflect On - How do you keep love feeling new? - What protects you from love’s deep wounds? A Different Perspective Love can become stagnant if over‑analyzed, leading to loss of spontaneity. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Destruction Deeply](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/destruction-deeply-3888905/) [Elegy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/elegy/) [Flower Imperishable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/flower-imperishable-3888904/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Lovers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lovers/) [Poetry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/poetry/) [Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rilke/) [Sobbing Tree](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sobbing-tree-3888906/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Too far](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/too-far/) ## Related quotes > [Every angel is terrifying.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/every-angel-is-terrifying/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Songs of longing! And they will resound in my letters, just as they always have, sometimes loudly and sometimes secretly so that you alone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/songs-of-longing-and-they-will-resound-in-my-letters-just-as-they/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“The Letters to a young poet illustrate perfectly the kindliness, the complexity, and at the same time the impersonality and remoteness of Rilke’s manner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/the-letters-to-a-young-poet-illustrate-perfectly-the-kindliness-the/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Do you remember…(doesn’t that appear in each of my letters?), do you remember that you spoke of how eagerly you experienced that period when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/do-you-remember-doesn-t-that-appear-in-each-of-my-letters-do-you/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“How they are all about, these gentlemen In chamberlains' apparel, stocked and laced, Like night around their order's star and gem And growing ever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/how-they-are-all-about-these-gentlemen-in-chamberlains-apparel/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“think: the hero prolongs himself, even his falling was only a pretext for being, his latest rebirth.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/think-the-hero-prolongs-himself-even-his-falling-was-only-a-pretext/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“If you were to give yourself over to this angel, Rilke tells the reader, some day, some night, the angel’s light hands kämen denn…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/if-you-were-to-give-yourself-over-to-this-angel-rilke-tells-the/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“We of the here-and-now are not for a moment satisfied in the world of time, nor are we bound in it; we are continually…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/we-of-the-here-and-now-are-not-for-a-moment-satisfied-in-the-world-of/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Not numbering and counting, but ripening like a tree.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/not-numbering-and-counting-but-ripening-like-a-tree/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“As one puts a handkerchief before pent-in-breath- no: as one presses it against a wound out of which the whole of life, in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/as-one-puts-a-handkerchief-before-pent-in-breath-no-as-one-presses-it/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“And you, Clara Westhoff, how simply and well you endured, lived through the experience, and made it a forward step in your young existence!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/and-you-clara-westhoff-how-simply-and-well-you-endured-lived-through/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ambrose-bierce/elegy-n-a-composition-in-verse-in-which-without-employing-any-of-the/) [Ambrose Bierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ambrose-bierce/) > [My images are unashamedly idyllic and romantic, a kind of enchanted Africa. They're my elegy to a world that is steadily, tragically vanishing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nick-brandt/my-images-are-unashamedly-idyllic-and-romantic-a-kind-of-enchanted/) [Nick Brandt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nick-brandt/) > [Full many a flower is born to blush unseen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-joyce/full-many-a-flower-is-born-to-blush-unseen/) [James Joyce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-joyce/) > [“Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep, He hath awaken’d from the dream of life; ’Tis we, who lost in stormy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/peace-peace-he-is-not-dead-he-doth-not-sleep-he-hath-awaken-d-from/) [Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/) ## More by Rainer Maria Rilke > [The artist's experience lies so unbelievably close to the sexual, to its pain and its pleasure, that the two phenomena are really just different…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/the-artist-s-experience-lies-so-unbelievably-close-to-the-sexual-to/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Out of infinite longings rise finite deeds like weak fountains, falling back just in time and trembling. And yet, what otherwise remains silent, our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/out-of-infinite-longings-rise-finite-deeds-like-weak-fountains/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“I love the dark hours of my being. My mind deepens into them. There I can find, as in old letters, the days of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/i-love-the-dark-hours-of-my-being-my-mind-deepens-into-them-there-i/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“A complete sharing between two people is an impossibility and whenever it seems, nevertheless, to exist, it is a narrowing, a mutual agreement which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/a-complete-sharing-between-two-people-is-an-impossibility-and/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“But this is what ... people are so often and disastrously wrong in doing: they (who by their very nature are impatient) fling themselves…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/but-this-is-what-people-are-so-often-and-disastrously-wrong-in-doing/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“If there is nothing you can share with other people, try to be close to Things. Things will not abandon you. The nights are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/if-there-is-nothing-you-can-share-with-other-people-try-to-be-close/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [To be here is immense.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/to-be-here-is-immense/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Sin is the most wonderfully roundabout path to God”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/sin-is-the-most-wonderfully-roundabout-path-to-god/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [Swells, Marina? we ocean, depths, Marina? we sky!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/swells-marina-we-ocean-depths-marina-we-sky/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries; on the contrary, a good marriage is one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/the-point-of-marriage-is-not-to-create-a-quick-commonality-by-tearing/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [You life will find its own paths... and that they be good, rich, and wide is what I wish for you, more than I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/you-life-will-find-its-own-paths-and-that-they-be-good-rich-and-wide/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [I do not want to be folded for where I am folded, there I am a lie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/i-do-not-want-to-be-folded-for-where-i-am-folded-there-i-am-a-lie/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [At no other time (than autumn) does the earth let itself be inhaled in one smell, the ripe earth; in a smell that is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/at-no-other-time-than-autumn-does-the-earth-let-itself-be-inhaled-in/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“That is why the sadness passes: the new presence inside us, the presence that has been added, has entered our heart, has gone into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/that-is-why-the-sadness-passes-the-new-presence-inside-us-the/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms, like books written in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/have-patience-with-everything-that-remains-unsolved-in-your-heart-try/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) [Explore all 861 Rainer Maria Rilke quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) ## More Elegy quotes > [“Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep, He hath awaken’d from the dream of life; ’Tis we, who lost in stormy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/peace-peace-he-is-not-dead-he-doth-not-sleep-he-hath-awaken-d-from/) [Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/) > [Full many a flower is born to blush unseen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-joyce/full-many-a-flower-is-born-to-blush-unseen/) [James Joyce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-joyce/) > [My images are unashamedly idyllic and romantic, a kind of enchanted Africa. They're my elegy to a world that is steadily, tragically vanishing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nick-brandt/my-images-are-unashamedly-idyllic-and-romantic-a-kind-of-enchanted/) [Nick Brandt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nick-brandt/) > [ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ambrose-bierce/elegy-n-a-composition-in-verse-in-which-without-employing-any-of-the/) [Ambrose Bierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ambrose-bierce/) > [“We pass and leave you lying. No need for rhetoric, for funeral music, for melancholy bugle-calls. No need for tears now, no need for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-aldington/we-pass-and-leave-you-lying-no-need-for-rhetoric-for-funeral-music/) [Richard Aldington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-aldington/) > [We should write an elegy for every day that has slipped through our lives unnoticed and unappreciated. Better still, we should write a song…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-ban-breathnach/we-should-write-an-elegy-for-every-day-that-has-slipped-through-our/) [Sarah Ban Breathnach](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-ban-breathnach/) > [When I was from Cupid's passions free, my Muse was mute and wrote no elegy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/when-i-was-from-cupid-s-passions-free-my-muse-was-mute-and-wrote-no/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [“How the time passed away, slipped into nightfall as if it had never been!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/how-the-time-passed-away-slipped-into-nightfall-as-if-it-had-never/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Travel is a caprice in childhood, a passion in youth, a necessity in manhood, and an elegy in old age.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jos-rizal/travel-is-a-caprice-in-childhood-a-passion-in-youth-a-necessity-in/) [Jose Rizal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jos-rizal/) > [The elegy does the work of mourning; it allows us to experience mortality. It turns loss into remembrance, and it delivers an inheritance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edward-hirsch/the-elegy-does-the-work-of-mourning-it-allows-us-to-experience/) [Edward Hirsch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edward-hirsch/) > [“It's really over." He put his arms around her, pulling her to him. "Now just as long as you don't get tangled up with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amanda-hocking/it-s-really-over-he-put-his-arms-around-her-pulling-her-to-him-now/) [Amanda Hocking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amanda-hocking/) > [I want my images to achieve two things in this regard - to be an elegy to a world that is tragically vanishing, to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nick-brandt/i-want-my-images-to-achieve-two-things-in-this-regard-to-be-an-elegy/) [Nick Brandt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nick-brandt/) > [I can’t talk about my books. I have written them and tried to forget them. I have written once, and readers have read me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jorge-luis-borges/i-can-t-talk-about-my-books-i-have-written-them-and-tried-to-forget/) [Jorge Luis Borges](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jorge-luis-borges/) > [There's something really unnatural about losing a child, and there's something unnatural about having to write an elegy for your child, but I felt…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edward-hirsch/there-s-something-really-unnatural-about-losing-a-child-and-there-s/) [Edward Hirsch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edward-hirsch/) > [“An Elegy A thousand times must we deplore The lost will never come to life again; Even as flowing water runs away, Returning nevermore.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/reiko-chiba/an-elegy-a-thousand-times-must-we-deplore-the-lost-will-never-come-to/) [Reiko Chiba](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/reiko-chiba/) [Browse all 55 Elegy quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/elegy/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Lovers were not, Marina, are not permitted to know destruction so deeply. 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