--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile…" description: "\"The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile, her rigidity, her goody-goody outlook, her obsession with unnecessary hygiene, is in fact a fool. It is the 'b..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d90/rachel-cusk-3482_bad-mother_the-good-mother-with-her-fixed-smile-her_1118194.jpg" --- # The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile, her rigidity, her… ![“The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile, her rigidity, her goody-goody outlook, her obsession with unnecessary hygiene, is in fact a fool. It is the 'bad' mother, unafraid of a joke and a glass of wine, richly self-expressive, scornful of suburban values, who is, in reality, good.” quote by Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d90/rachel-cusk-3482_bad-mother_the-good-mother-with-her-fixed-smile-her_1118194.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d90/rachel-cusk-3482_bad-mother_the-good-mother-with-her-fixed-smile-her_1118194.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d90/rachel-cusk-3482_bad-mother_the-good-mother-with-her-fixed-smile-her_1118194.jpg) > “The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile, her rigidity, her goody-goody outlook, her obsession with unnecessary hygiene, is in fact a fool. It is the 'bad' mother, unafraid of a joke and a glass of wine, richly self-expressive, scornful of suburban values, who is, in reality, good.” [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A mother who embraces spontaneity and self‑expression, rejecting rigid expectations, is truly authentic, while strict adherence to conventional norms can be superficial. **In simple terms:** Authenticity beats rigid perfection. Key Takeaway Embrace genuine self‑expression. Themes authenticity parenting conformity individualism freedom Mood reflective critical Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - Parenting decisions - social gatherings - family rituals - personal growth Key Concepts Self‑expression social critique family dynamics gender roles Questions to Reflect On - What does “good mother” mean to you? - How can flexibility be balanced with responsibility? A Different Perspective Rigid expectations may provide stability for some children, making the critique nuanced. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Bad mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-mother/) [Expressive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/expressive/) [Expressive Scornful](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/expressive-scornful-3012453/) [Facts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/facts/) [Fixed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fixed/) [Fool](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fool/) [Glasses](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/glasses/) [Good](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good/) [Good mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good-mother/) [Hygiene](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hygiene/) [Jokes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jokes/) [Mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother/) [Mother Unafraid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother-unafraid-3012452/) [Obsession](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/obsession/) [Outlook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/outlook/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reality/) [Rigidity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rigidity/) [Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self/) [Smile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/smile/) [Unafraid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unafraid/) [Unnecessary](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unnecessary/) [Values](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/values/) [Wine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wine/) [Wine glass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wine-glass/) ## Related quotes > [As a boy, when I was bad, my mother would chew me out in Spanish. 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Making a decision that might sound selfish does not make a woman a bad mother.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jada-pinkett-smith/good-mothers-make-all-kinds-of-choices-making-a-decision-that-might/) [Jada Pinkett Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jada-pinkett-smith/) > [It was always me and my sister against the big bad world. The world was bad because of our mother. Now that she was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-was-always-me-and-my-sister-against-the-big-bad-world-the-world/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Social expectations about what constitutes a good or a bad mother haunt every decision, and the rise of the parental advice industry ensures that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jessica-valenti/social-expectations-about-what-constitutes-a-good-or-a-bad-mother/) [Jessica Valenti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jessica-valenti/) > [I think that an author who speaks about his own books is almost as bad as a mother who talks about her own children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/benjamin-disraeli/i-think-that-an-author-who-speaks-about-his-own-books-is-almost-as/) [Benjamin Disraeli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/benjamin-disraeli/) > [Say what you mean to your children and mean exactly what you say about them to the world while keeping in mind they are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-pickett/say-what-you-mean-to-your-children-and-mean-exactly-what-you-say/) [Fay Pickett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-pickett/) > [And that's the insult of it, how always it comes back to a woman being a "good" mother in the world's eyes or a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joyce-carol-oates/and-that-s-the-insult-of-it-how-always-it-comes-back-to-a-woman-being/) [Joyce Carol Oates](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joyce-carol-oates/) > [“Even if I’m setting myself up for failure, I think it’s worth trying to be a mother who delights in who her children are,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayelet-waldman/even-if-i-m-setting-myself-up-for-failure-i-think-it-s-worth-trying/) [Ayelet Waldman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayelet-waldman/) > [“Admitting that this job isn’t always easy doesn’t make somebody a bad mother. At least, it shouldn’t. We’re all on this ride together. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-smokler/admitting-that-this-job-isn-t-always-easy-doesn-t-make-somebody-a-bad/) [Jill Smokler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-smokler/) > [“As a teenager, he made screaming noises at night in his room, like a deranged person. He threw his electrical pencil sharpener at the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tao-lin/as-a-teenager-he-made-screaming-noises-at-night-in-his-room-like-a/) [Tao Lin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tao-lin/) > [“I didn't feel like a slut, a bad mother, a terrible person. I didn't worry about my nudity or if he liked what I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristen-ashley/i-didn-t-feel-like-a-slut-a-bad-mother-a-terrible-person-i-didn-t/) [Kristen Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristen-ashley/) > [Wanna know something I don't like?? Little girls that have a wonderful home and a loving mother!! And they get EVERYTHING they ask for!!!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alisha/wanna-know-something-i-don-t-like-little-girls-that-have-a-wonderful/) [Alisha](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alisha/) ## More by Rachel Cusk > [A creative writing workshop will contain students whose ambitions and abilities, whose conceptions of literature itself, are so diverse that what they have in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/a-creative-writing-workshop-will-contain-students-whose-ambitions-and/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [“If a man had a nasty side to his character, she wanted to get to it immediately and confront it. 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So the idea that others are demanding to be given it back -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/the-creativity-of-childhood-was-often-surrendered-amid-feelings-of/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [A neighbor is something that belongs to the stable world of home life, the thing that lives next door to you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/a-neighbor-is-something-that-belongs-to-the-stable-world-of-home-life/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [Help is dangerous because it exists outside the human economy: the only payment for help is gratitude.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/help-is-dangerous-because-it-exists-outside-the-human-economy-the/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [A feminist man is a bit like a vegetarian: it's the humanitarian principle he's defending, I suppose.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/a-feminist-man-is-a-bit-like-a-vegetarian-it-s-the-humanitarian/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [Feminism remains something that needs to be explained to people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/feminism-remains-something-that-needs-to-be-explained-to-people/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [“At the time, he had got rid of her so efficiently and so suavely that she had felt almost reassured even as she was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/at-the-time-he-had-got-rid-of-her-so-efficiently-and-so-suavely-that/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [“From the distance of England the Italian cuisine seems to be all things to all people. It does not expect you to bend to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/from-the-distance-of-england-the-italian-cuisine-seems-to-be-all/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [You could time a suburban story by your watch: it lasts as long as it takes a small furry animal that's lonely to find…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/you-could-time-a-suburban-story-by-your-watch-it-lasts-as-long-as-it/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [It is expected that a children's story will raise a difficulty and then resolve it: increasingly, this resolution is so prompt and so resounding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/it-is-expected-that-a-children-s-story-will-raise-a-difficulty-and/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [Human beings have a need, generally, to destroy things. The Freudian principle of civilisation is correct. There's always, always a difference between the family…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/human-beings-have-a-need-generally-to-destroy-things-the-freudian/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) > [I don't think I knew that you could be a novelist. I think a lot of my students are in the same condition. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-cusk/i-don-t-think-i-knew-that-you-could-be-a-novelist-i-think-a-lot-of-my/) [Rachel Cusk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) [Explore all 128 Rachel Cusk quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-cusk/) ## More Bad mother quotes > [As a boy, when I was bad, my mother would chew me out in Spanish. And since I was bad a lot, I learned…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-sununu/as-a-boy-when-i-was-bad-my-mother-would-chew-me-out-in-spanish-and/) [John Sununu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-sununu/) > [“I didn't feel like a slut, a bad mother, a terrible person. I didn't worry about my nudity or if he liked what I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristen-ashley/i-didn-t-feel-like-a-slut-a-bad-mother-a-terrible-person-i-didn-t/) [Kristen Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristen-ashley/) > [“As a teenager, he made screaming noises at night in his room, like a deranged person. He threw his electrical pencil sharpener at the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tao-lin/as-a-teenager-he-made-screaming-noises-at-night-in-his-room-like-a/) [Tao Lin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tao-lin/) > [“Admitting that this job isn’t always easy doesn’t make somebody a bad mother. At least, it shouldn’t. We’re all on this ride together. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-smokler/admitting-that-this-job-isn-t-always-easy-doesn-t-make-somebody-a-bad/) [Jill Smokler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-smokler/) > [“Even if I’m setting myself up for failure, I think it’s worth trying to be a mother who delights in who her children are,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayelet-waldman/even-if-i-m-setting-myself-up-for-failure-i-think-it-s-worth-trying/) [Ayelet Waldman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayelet-waldman/) > [And that's the insult of it, how always it comes back to a woman being a "good" mother in the world's eyes or a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joyce-carol-oates/and-that-s-the-insult-of-it-how-always-it-comes-back-to-a-woman-being/) [Joyce Carol Oates](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joyce-carol-oates/) > [Say what you mean to your children and mean exactly what you say about them to the world while keeping in mind they are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-pickett/say-what-you-mean-to-your-children-and-mean-exactly-what-you-say/) [Fay Pickett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-pickett/) > [I think that an author who speaks about his own books is almost as bad as a mother who talks about her own children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/benjamin-disraeli/i-think-that-an-author-who-speaks-about-his-own-books-is-almost-as/) [Benjamin Disraeli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/benjamin-disraeli/) > [“Social expectations about what constitutes a good or a bad mother haunt every decision, and the rise of the parental advice industry ensures that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jessica-valenti/social-expectations-about-what-constitutes-a-good-or-a-bad-mother/) [Jessica Valenti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jessica-valenti/) > [It was always me and my sister against the big bad world. The world was bad because of our mother. Now that she was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-was-always-me-and-my-sister-against-the-big-bad-world-the-world/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Good mothers make all kinds of choices. Making a decision that might sound selfish does not make a woman a bad mother.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jada-pinkett-smith/good-mothers-make-all-kinds-of-choices-making-a-decision-that-might/) [Jada Pinkett Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jada-pinkett-smith/) > [In reality the world is as full of bad mothers as it is of bad fathers, and it is not the motherless children who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-de-bernieres/in-reality-the-world-is-as-full-of-bad-mothers-as-it-is-of-bad/) [Louis de Bernieres](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-de-bernieres/) > [Around a third of parents still worry that they will look like a bad mother or father if their child has a mental health…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-middleton/around-a-third-of-parents-still-worry-that-they-will-look-like-a-bad/) [Kate Middleton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-middleton/) > [I love my husband more than I love my children,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayelet-waldman/i-love-my-husband-more-than-i-love-my-children/) [Ayelet Waldman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayelet-waldman/) > [Wanna know something I don't like?? Little girls that have a wonderful home and a loving mother!! And they get EVERYTHING they ask for!!!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alisha/wanna-know-something-i-don-t-like-little-girls-that-have-a-wonderful/) [Alisha](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alisha/) [Browse all 55 Bad mother quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-mother/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The 'good' mother, with her fixed smile, her rigidity, her goody-goody outlook, her obsession with unnecessary hygiene, is in fact a fool. 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