--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: That these girls avoid use of physical…" description: "\"“That these girls avoid use of physical violence in resolving conflict, does not mean that these conflicts are resolved in meaningful and enduring ways..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/965/phyllis-chesler-16740_physical-violence_that-these-girls-avoid-use-of-physical-v_966109.png" --- # That these girls avoid use of physical violence in… ![“That these girls avoid use of physical violence in resolving conflict, does not mean that these conflicts are resolved in meaningful and enduring ways. Girls might smile, give in, give up - and then continue the conflict behind their opponents' backs. Girls might also smile, give in, make fatal…” quote by Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/965/phyllis-chesler-16740_physical-violence_that-these-girls-avoid-use-of-physical-v_966109.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/965/phyllis-chesler-16740_physical-violence_that-these-girls-avoid-use-of-physical-v_966109.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/965/phyllis-chesler-16740_physical-violence_that-these-girls-avoid-use-of-physical-v_966109.png) > ““That these girls avoid use of physical violence in resolving conflict, does not mean that these conflicts are resolved in meaningful and enduring ways. Girls might smile, give in, give up - and then continue the conflict behind their opponents' backs. Girls might also smile, give in, make fatal compromises, because their need to belong (or not to be excluded) is more important to them than sticking to their principles.”” [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Non‑violent conflict avoidance can mask unresolved tension, leading to hidden resentment and compromised values. **In simple terms:** Avoiding violence may hide deeper problems. Key Takeaway Address conflict directly, not just superficially. Themes conflict resolution gender dynamics authenticity social pressure Mood reflective concerned Type advisory analytical When to use this quote - team meetings - friendships - family discussions - negotiations - activism Key Concepts power dynamics psychology identity belonging Questions to Reflect On - How do you balance belonging with personal integrity? - What hidden costs arise from always conceding? A Different Perspective Surface peace can prevent genuine healing. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Physical violence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/physical-violence/) [Resolving conflict](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resolving-conflict/) [War](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/war/) ## Related quotes > [Conflict does not lead to stability in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohammed-morsi/conflict-does-not-lead-to-stability-in-the-world/) [Mohammed Morsi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohammed-morsi/) > [We need a Peace Department in our national government to do extensive research on peaceful ways of resolving conflicts. 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Keep the following points…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dale-carnegie-training/many-of-the-principles-dale-carnegie-writes-about-in-how-to-win/) [Dale Carnegie Training](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dale-carnegie-training/) > [Emotional intelligence in the work that we do, in the Resolving Conflict Creatively Program, is about equipping young people with the kinds of skills…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/linda-lantieri/emotional-intelligence-in-the-work-that-we-do-in-the-resolving/) Linda Lantieri > [“Sometimes the simplest solution out of conflict is becoming someone’s friend, instead of saying goodbye forever.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-l-alder/sometimes-the-simplest-solution-out-of-conflict-is-becoming-someone-s/) [Shannon L. Alder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-l-alder/) > [Don't let the sun go down on me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elton-john/don-t-let-the-sun-go-down-on-me/) [Elton John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elton-john/) > [If an agency is the ultimate judge in every case of conflict, then it is also judge in all conflicts involving itself. Consequently, instead…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hans-hermann-hoppe/if-an-agency-is-the-ultimate-judge-in-every-case-of-conflict-then-it/) [Hans-Hermann Hoppe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hans-hermann-hoppe/) > [Peace is a never-ending process, the work of many decisions by many people in many countries. It is an attitude, a way of life,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scar-arias/peace-is-a-never-ending-process-the-work-of-many-decisions-by-many/) [Oscar Arias](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scar-arias/) > [We have to have some form of politics. Politics is a form of resolving conflicts. Politics which comes from sincere motivation is constructive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dalai-lama/we-have-to-have-some-form-of-politics-politics-is-a-form-of-resolving/) [Dalai Lama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dalai-lama/) > [We found out that the young people who had a substantial number of lessons in the Resolving Conflict Creatively Curriculum ... not only did…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/linda-lantieri/we-found-out-that-the-young-people-who-had-a-substantial-number-of/) Linda Lantieri > [A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/solomon/a-gentle-answer-turns-away-wrath-but-a-harsh-word-stirs-up-anger/) [Solomon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/solomon/) > [It is hard to change our point of view in a conflict. Most often, it is because we are not nearly as interested in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-crum/it-is-hard-to-change-our-point-of-view-in-a-conflict-most-often-it-is/) [Thomas Crum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-crum/) > [The number one goal in resolving a conflict is to make sure both sides maintain their self-esteem. Resolving conflict is rarely about who is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-crum/the-number-one-goal-in-resolving-a-conflict-is-to-make-sure-both/) [Thomas Crum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-crum/) > [The most constructive way of resolving conflicts is to avoid them](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/felix-frankfurter/the-most-constructive-way-of-resolving-conflicts-is-to-avoid-them/) [Felix Frankfurter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/felix-frankfurter/) ## More by Phyllis Chesler > [Only the powerless live in a money culture and know nothing about money.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/only-the-powerless-live-in-a-money-culture-and-know-nothing-about/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Ideal mental health, like freedom, exists for one person only if it exists for all people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/ideal-mental-health-like-freedom-exists-for-one-person-only-if-it/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [If it were natural for father to care for their sons, they would not need so many laws commanding them to do so.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/if-it-were-natural-for-father-to-care-for-their-sons-they-would-not/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [“It is impossible for a Westerner to imagine the deadening torpor of a protected life under house arrest. Eventually, one is grateful for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/it-is-impossible-for-a-westerner-to-imagine-the-deadening-torpor-of-a/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [“The idea that women's strong attachments to each other are what make them so vulnerable is horrifying. I count my close friendships with a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/the-idea-that-women-s-strong-attachments-to-each-other-are-what-make/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [All men are not rapists - but almost all rapists are men.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/all-men-are-not-rapists-but-almost-all-rapists-are-men/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Should or can there be a single standard of behavior for both sexes? Is there such a thing as a biologically rooted female culture…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/should-or-can-there-be-a-single-standard-of-behavior-for-both-sexes/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Perhaps only some young women, perhaps only a minority of all women, will be able to effect such changes through consciousness alone, through the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/perhaps-only-some-young-women-perhaps-only-a-minority-of-all-women/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [“Encountering gender apartheid and waged slavery shook me to my roots more than half a century ago in Afghanistan. Oh, the women of Afghanistan,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/encountering-gender-apartheid-and-waged-slavery-shook-me-to-my-roots/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [children need truly evolved people - not other, larger children - as parents. Therefore, don't have a child until you've forged your own identity,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/children-need-truly-evolved-people-not-other-larger-children-as/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [“The chowdry, or burqa -- the Saudi, North African, and Central Asian version of the head, face, and body shroud -- is a sensory…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/the-chowdry-or-burqa-the-saudi-north-african-and-central-asian/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Most mother-women give up whatever ghost of a unique and human self they may have when they 'marry' and raise children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/most-mother-women-give-up-whatever-ghost-of-a-unique-and-human-self/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Goddesses never die. They slip in and out of the world's cities, in and out of our dreams, century after century, answering to different…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/goddesses-never-die-they-slip-in-and-out-of-the-world-s-cities-in-and/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Women ... do not have to forsake the "wisdom of the heart" and become men. They need only transfer the primary force of their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/women-do-not-have-to-forsake-the-wisdom-of-the-heart-and-become-men/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) > [Sexual pleasure is not a sin. Nor is it a sacrament. It is your right as a human being to exercise as you see…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-chesler/sexual-pleasure-is-not-a-sin-nor-is-it-a-sacrament-it-is-your-right/) [Phyllis Chesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) [Explore all 39 Phyllis Chesler quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-chesler/) ## More Physical violence quotes > [There's nothing worse than a violent beating from an unremarkable person. Physical violence with someone is too much like shagging them. Too much id…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irvine-welsh/there-s-nothing-worse-than-a-violent-beating-from-an-unremarkable/) [Irvine Welsh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irvine-welsh/) > [I've never liked talking about my personal life, ever. Ever since I was 20, I've lived in a kind of public arena; and there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/timothy-dalton/i-ve-never-liked-talking-about-my-personal-life-ever-ever-since-i-was/) [Timothy Dalton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/timothy-dalton/) > [“We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-luther-king-jr-2/we-must-forever-conduct-our-struggle-on-the-high-plane-of-dignity-and/) [Martin Luther King Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-luther-king-jr-2/) > [I think when people talk about civil liberties, they sometimes forget that action taken to protect the citizen against physical violence and physical attack…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-howard/i-think-when-people-talk-about-civil-liberties-they-sometimes-forget/) [John Howard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-howard/) > [I was always a feminist, for I liked intellectual revolt as much as I disliked physical violence. On the whole, I think women havelost…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-glasgow/i-was-always-a-feminist-for-i-liked-intellectual-revolt-as-much-as-i/) [Ellen Glasgow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-glasgow/) > [My family were staunch believers in physical violence, not automatic violence, and we had a Safeway around the corner, so we never really needed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurie-notaro/my-family-were-staunch-believers-in-physical-violence-not-automatic/) [Laurie Notaro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurie-notaro/) > [“Sir, in your thirty-nine years as a parent, you broke your children's hearts, collectively and individually, 612 times and you did this without ever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherman-alexie/sir-in-your-thirty-nine-years-as-a-parent-you-broke-your-children-s/) [Sherman Alexie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherman-alexie/) > [Domination delegates the physical violence on which it rests to the dominated.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodor-adorno/domination-delegates-the-physical-violence-on-which-it-rests-to-the/) [Theodor Adorno](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodor-adorno/) > [I've been trying to get away from physical violence; it's too easy; it doesn't satisfy me artistically to work with it. Dramatic violence is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicolas-winding-refn/i-ve-been-trying-to-get-away-from-physical-violence-it-s-too-easy-it/) [Nicolas Winding Refn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicolas-winding-refn/) > [I like violence because I like looking at it and I like understanding emotional and physical violence and how they work with one another...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kimberly-peirce/i-like-violence-because-i-like-looking-at-it-and-i-like-understanding/) [Kimberly Peirce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kimberly-peirce/) > [“Legal and political theory have committed much mischief by failing to pinpoint physical invasion as the only human action that should be illegal and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/murray-n-rothbard/legal-and-political-theory-have-committed-much-mischief-by-failing-to/) [Murray N. Rothbard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/murray-n-rothbard/) > [“Online threats of violence seem to have a very simple purpose: they are intended to act as a reminder to women that men are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bailey-poland/online-threats-of-violence-seem-to-have-a-very-simple-purpose-they/) [Bailey Poland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bailey-poland/) > [The time has also come to recognize the painful truth that traditional Judeo-Christian moral values of pain and pleasure in human relationships have contributed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-w-prescott/the-time-has-also-come-to-recognize-the-painful-truth-that/) James W. Prescott > [The soul is part of the body. The mind is part of the body. 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