--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Being proper and sweet and nice and…" description: "\"“Being proper and sweet and nice and pleasing is a fucking nightmare. It’s exhausting. As women, we get the message about how to be a good girl – how t..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc7/phoebe-waller-bridge-8068_change-the-world_being-proper-and-sweet-and-nice-and-plea_2385314.jpg" --- # Being proper and sweet and nice and pleasing is a fucking… ![“Being proper and sweet and nice and pleasing is a fucking nightmare. It’s exhausting. As women, we get the message about how to be a good girl – how to be a good, pretty girl – from such an early age. Then, at the same time, we’re told that well-behaved girls won’t change the world or ever make a…” quote by Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc7/phoebe-waller-bridge-8068_change-the-world_being-proper-and-sweet-and-nice-and-plea_2385314.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc7/phoebe-waller-bridge-8068_change-the-world_being-proper-and-sweet-and-nice-and-plea_2385314.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc7/phoebe-waller-bridge-8068_change-the-world_being-proper-and-sweet-and-nice-and-plea_2385314.jpg) > ““Being proper and sweet and nice and pleasing is a fucking nightmare. It’s exhausting. As women, we get the message about how to be a good girl – how to be a good, pretty girl – from such an early age. Then, at the same time, we’re told that well-behaved girls won’t change the world or ever make a splash. So it’s sort of like, well, what the fuck am I supposed to be? I’m supposed to be a really polite revolutionary?” Phoebe Waller-Bridge spreads her arms and starts to laugh. “It’s impossible.”” [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Societal pressure forces women into contradictory roles of being compliant yet revolutionary, creating an impossible standard. **In simple terms:** Women are pressured to be both perfect and disruptive, which is exhausting. Key Takeaway Reject the binary and define your own standards. Themes gender expectations identity social pressure feminism Mood frustrated determined hopeful Type critical inspirational When to use this quote - career advancement - personal relationships - public speaking - creative work Key Concepts double bind performative femininity authenticity Questions to Reflect On - How can you balance personal authenticity with societal expectations? - What alternative models of femininity could replace the “nice girl” trope? A Different Perspective The quote may overgeneralize experiences and ignore cultural variations. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Change the world](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/change-the-world/) [Pretty girl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pretty-girl/) ## Related quotes > [As women, we get the message about how to be a good girl - how to be a good, pretty girl - from such…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/as-women-we-get-the-message-about-how-to-be-a-good-girl-how-to-be-a/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [Tanushree is a very nice girl and I worked with her once. She is very focussed, and I could see how hard-working she was,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sonu-sood/tanushree-is-a-very-nice-girl-and-i-worked-with-her-once-she-is-very/) [Sonu Sood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sonu-sood/) > [“You’re a good girl. You’re so good, you’ve let the desire to be it overtake you. It’s defined who you are. …. You’ve always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/latanya-mcqueen/you-re-a-good-girl-you-re-so-good-you-ve-let-the-desire-to-be-it/) LaTanya McQueen > [A good girl will do good and a bad girl will do bad, but it takes a bad girl for a good girl to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/syntific/a-good-girl-will-do-good-and-a-bad-girl-will-do-bad-but-it-takes-a/) Syntific > [(Verse 1) Hey good girl, With your head in the clouds, I bet you I can tell you what you're thinkin' about. You'll see…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carrie-underwood/verse-1-hey-good-girl-with-your-head-in-the-clouds-i-bet-you-i-can/) [Carrie Underwood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carrie-underwood/) > [I'm kind of a good girl -- and I'm not. I'm a good girl because I really believe in love, integrity, and respect. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-perry-tattoo/i-m-kind-of-a-good-girl-and-i-m-not-i-m-a-good-girl-because-i-really-2/) Katy Perry Tattoo > [“Here is what I think now, reading what I wrote down for the police at age fifteen, right after I was raped. I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jessica-stern/here-is-what-i-think-now-reading-what-i-wrote-down-for-the-police-at/) [Jessica Stern](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jessica-stern/) > [I'm kind of a good girl - and I'm not. I'm a good girl because I really believe in love, integrity, and respect. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-perry/i-m-kind-of-a-good-girl-and-i-m-not-i-m-a-good-girl-because-i-really/) [Katy Perry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katy-perry/) > [You know he's cheating...but you stay with him...you're a good girl...a good, stupid girl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerett-parker/you-know-he-s-cheating-but-you-stay-with-him-you-re-a-good-girl-a/) [Jerett Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerett-parker/) > [“They say be a good girl, get good grades, be popular. They know nothing about me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-mcgarry/they-say-be-a-good-girl-get-good-grades-be-popular-they-know-nothing/) [Katie McGarry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-mcgarry/) > [“Ah, such a good pretty one.' There was a pause, 'You even got yourself dressed up.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlotte-munro/ah-such-a-good-pretty-one-there-was-a-pause-you-even-got-yourself/) [Charlotte Munro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlotte-munro/) > [Be amazing. Be good. Be pretty. Be strong. Be smart. Be cool. But the most important thing, be yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/be-amazing-be-good-be-pretty-be-strong-be-smart-be-cool-but-the-most/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“There is good in pretty much every situation, we just have to look for it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ben-hunt-davis/there-is-good-in-pretty-much-every-situation-we-just-have-to-look-for/) [Ben Hunt-Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ben-hunt-davis/) > [I think Charlize Theron is just as good when she is looking really pretty in a movie as when she gains 10 pounds and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/diane-kruger/i-think-charlize-theron-is-just-as-good-when-she-is-looking-really/) [Diane Kruger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/diane-kruger/) > [What is good?" ye ask. To be brave is good. Let the little girls say: "To be good is what is pretty, and at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/friedrich-nietzsche/what-is-good-ye-ask-to-be-brave-is-good-let-the-little-girls-say-to/) [Friedrich Nietzsche](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/friedrich-nietzsche/) ## More by Phoebe Waller-Bridge > [I am comfortable talking about sex scenes and stuff, but to me, when it's physically explicit, I do feel prudish and uncomfortable.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-am-comfortable-talking-about-sex-scenes-and-stuff-but-to-me-when-it/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I think there's something funny about people who laugh in the face of convention or surprise us morally.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-think-there-s-something-funny-about-people-who-laugh-in-the-face-of/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I'll never get bored of seeing flawed women on the screen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-ll-never-get-bored-of-seeing-flawed-women-on-the-screen/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [Fleabag knows men and women are equal and should be treated as such, but what she's confused about - and what I was confused…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/fleabag-knows-men-and-women-are-equal-and-should-be-treated-as-such/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I feel like my home is stage acting.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-feel-like-my-home-is-stage-acting/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I just kind of like to feel myself into stuff by writing scenes and seeing what characters end up saying.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-just-kind-of-like-to-feel-myself-into-stuff-by-writing-scenes-and/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I just find all that stuff incredibly funny. I love a fart. I'd do anything for a good poo story.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-just-find-all-that-stuff-incredibly-funny-i-love-a-fart-i-d-do/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [Women know what they're doing all the time, and they're pretending that they don't.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/women-know-what-they-re-doing-all-the-time-and-they-re-pretending/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I suppose the cult of the strong woman character on TV has probably been misinterpreted in so many different ways, meaning that a woman…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-suppose-the-cult-of-the-strong-woman-character-on-tv-has-probably/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [Actually, my worst nightmare is losing my best friend, as I imagine most people's are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/actually-my-worst-nightmare-is-losing-my-best-friend-as-i-imagine/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I'm just constantly on the verge of bursting into tears with joy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-m-just-constantly-on-the-verge-of-bursting-into-tears-with-joy/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [The main relationship in the whole series was the one between the camera and Fleabag. I had to convince myself that whoever was watching…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/the-main-relationship-in-the-whole-series-was-the-one-between-the/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [This world of 'Star Wars' is just so accepting and beautiful that the idea a droid and a human are trying to waddle their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/this-world-of-star-wars-is-just-so-accepting-and-beautiful-that-the/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I always knew that if I was ever going to perform something that I wrote in front of an audience, I was going to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-always-knew-that-if-i-was-ever-going-to-perform-something-that-i/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) > [I'd go so far as to say I was bullied into writing, but sometimes you need that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phoebe-waller-bridge/i-d-go-so-far-as-to-say-i-was-bullied-into-writing-but-sometimes-you/) [Phoebe Waller-Bridge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) [Explore all 84 Phoebe Waller-Bridge quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phoebe-waller-bridge/) ## More Change the world quotes > [If you learn something that changes you, you've made progress. If you learn something that changes others, you've helped change the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lanie-lane/if-you-learn-something-that-changes-you-you-ve-made-progress-if-you/) Lanie Lane > [If you wanted to put the world to rights, who should you begin with: yourself or others?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aleksandr-solzhenitsyn/if-you-wanted-to-put-the-world-to-rights-who-should-you-begin-with/) [Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aleksandr-solzhenitsyn/) > [Paul Gray - he believed in my art, and I believed in his music. Together, we decided to change the world, and that's what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shawn-crahan/paul-gray-he-believed-in-my-art-and-i-believed-in-his-music-together/) [Shawn Crahan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shawn-crahan/) > [If I wanted to change the world, the last thing I would do is write a play.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-stoppard/if-i-wanted-to-change-the-world-the-last-thing-i-would-do-is-write-a/) [Tom Stoppard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-stoppard/) > [Some women are meant to change the world, while others are meant to hold it together. And then there are those of us who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/some-women-are-meant-to-change-the-world-while-others-are-meant-to/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [Curiously, the righteous Pharisees had little historical impact, save for a brief time in a remote corner of the Roman Empire. But Jesus' disciples…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-yancey/curiously-the-righteous-pharisees-had-little-historical-impact-save/) [Philip Yancey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-yancey/) > [“if i am not in the world simply to adapt to it, but rather transform it, and if it is not possible to change…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-freire/if-i-am-not-in-the-world-simply-to-adapt-to-it-but-rather-transform/) [Paulo Freire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-freire/) > [I don't like lyrics to be overbearing. I like them to say something. But I'm not trying to change the world overnight. Something simple…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-rodgers/i-don-t-like-lyrics-to-be-overbearing-i-like-them-to-say-something/) [Paul Rodgers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-rodgers/) > [Larry Kramer wisely realized so early on that to change the world, people have to know you. If they know you and see that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryan-murphy/larry-kramer-wisely-realized-so-early-on-that-to-change-the-world/) [Ryan Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryan-murphy/) > [“It takes a female to have a baby, It takes a woman to raise a child, It takes a mother to raise them correctly,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-l-alder/it-takes-a-female-to-have-a-baby-it-takes-a-woman-to-raise-a-child-it/) [Shannon L. Alder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-l-alder/) > [Don't underestimate the power of your vision to change the world. Whether that world is your office, your community, an industry or a global…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leroy-hood/don-t-underestimate-the-power-of-your-vision-to-change-the-world/) [Leroy Hood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leroy-hood/) > [“I've been waiting for you a long time, Alina" He said. "You and I are going to change the world.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leigh-bardugo/i-ve-been-waiting-for-you-a-long-time-alina-he-said-you-and-i-are/) [Leigh Bardugo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leigh-bardugo/) > [The most important thing in all human relationships is conversation, but people don’t talk anymore, they don’t sit down to talk and listen. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/the-most-important-thing-in-all-human-relationships-is-conversation/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [We can use our art to become political, to become something you want to talk about. We make clothes, but we have the chance…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olivier-rousteing/we-can-use-our-art-to-become-political-to-become-something-you-want/) [Olivier Rousteing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olivier-rousteing/) > [“Live each day as if it's our last', that was the conventional advice, but really who had the energy for that? What if it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/live-each-day-as-if-it-s-our-last-that-was-the-conventional-advice/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) [Browse all 2,043 Change the world quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/change-the-world/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Being proper and sweet and nice and pleasing is a fucking nightmare. It’s exhausting. As women, we get the message about how to be a good girl – how to be a good, pretty girl – from such an early age. Then, at the same time, we’re told that well-behaved girls won’t change the world or ever make a splash. So it’s sort of like, well, what the fuck am I supposed to be? 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