--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be…" description: "\"“I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on imbeciles. I know how hard it is to find the right person, but that’s no reason to exhau..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png" --- # I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time… ![“I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on imbeciles. I know how hard it is to find the right person, but that’s no reason to exhaustively work your way through all the wrong people. You seem to be living your romantic life by some kind of process of elimination. It’s like…” quote by Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png) > ““I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on imbeciles. I know how hard it is to find the right person, but that’s no reason to exhaustively work your way through all the wrong people. You seem to be living your romantic life by some kind of process of elimination. It’s like matching a Louis Quatorze armchair with one of those plastic patio tables. It simply doesn’t work.” “Oh, I see,” Bel said. “I’m an armchair, is that it?” “A Louis Quatorze armchair,” I qualified. “And my boyfriends are patio tables.” “Actually,” I remembered, “this one’s more like one of those self-assembly Swedish wardrobes.”” [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker warns against treating romantic relationships like a systematic elimination process, comparing mismatched partners to incompatible furniture, implying such a method leads to failure. **In simple terms:** Don't treat love as a checklist of wrong matches. Key Takeaway Avoid over‑systematizing dating. Themes relationships compatibility humor reflection Mood wry reflective Type anecdotal humorous When to use this quote - dating apps - friendship circles - social events Key Concepts social dynamics matching theory personal values Questions to Reflect On - How can you balance criteria with spontaneity? - What qualities truly matter beyond superficial fit? A Different Perspective Dating can be reduced to a formula that ignores chemistry. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Advice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/advice/) [Armchair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/armchair/) [Boyfriends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boyfriends/) [Dating](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dating/) [Ikea](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ikea/) [Romantic life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/romantic-life/) [Siblings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/siblings/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Wrong people](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wrong-people/) ## Related quotes > [“Dear Uncle Bernard - Your niece Frances - a four-eyed, French-plaited platypus awaiting the evaporation of h baby fat - thanks you very much…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carlene-bauer/dear-uncle-bernard-your-niece-frances-a-four-eyed-french-plaited/) [Carlene Bauer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carlene-bauer/) > [The painter’s instrument is his armchair.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edouard-vuillard/the-painter-s-instrument-is-his-armchair/) [Edouard Vuillard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edouard-vuillard/) > [By legend and perhaps by nature philosophers are more accustomed to the armchair than the workbench.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ian-hacking/by-legend-and-perhaps-by-nature-philosophers-are-more-accustomed-to/) [Ian Hacking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ian-hacking/) > [“The saggy armchair of clichés.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeanette-winterson/the-saggy-armchair-of-clich-s/) [Jeanette Winterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeanette-winterson/) > [“when after a perfect dinner I lounge in an armchair, when there is no one I hate to look at in the company and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lin-yutang/when-after-a-perfect-dinner-i-lounge-in-an-armchair-when-there-is-no/) [Lin Yutang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lin-yutang/) > [When I paint a woman in an armchair, the armchair is there to show illness and death-or as a protection.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pablo-picasso/when-i-paint-a-woman-in-an-armchair-the-armchair-is-there-to-show/) [Pablo Picasso](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pablo-picasso/) > [“An armchair is always an armchair, to the modern child, never a ship, never a desert island. The pattern on the wall are patterns;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daphne-du-maurier/an-armchair-is-always-an-armchair-to-the-modern-child-never-a-ship/) [Daphne du Maurier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daphne-du-maurier/) > [Breakfast is served on my Herend china and I sit in an old armchair so I can read the papers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/princess-michael-of-kent/breakfast-is-served-on-my-herend-china-and-i-sit-in-an-old-armchair/) [Princess Michael of Kent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/princess-michael-of-kent/) > [I dream of an art of balance, of quietness, something analogous to a good armchair.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henri-matisse/i-dream-of-an-art-of-balance-of-quietness-something-analogous-to-a/) [Henri Matisse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henri-matisse/) > [If rehearsed eye-rolls and sneers and armchair psychology worked, and were interesting, Fox wouldn't be number one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dagen-mcdowell/if-rehearsed-eye-rolls-and-sneers-and-armchair-psychology-worked-and/) [Dagen McDowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dagen-mcdowell/) > [“Soapy Sam looked as though he had just sat down on a favourite armchair which had gone missing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-mortimer/soapy-sam-looked-as-though-he-had-just-sat-down-on-a-favourite/) [John Mortimer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-mortimer/) > [You can't do business sitting on your ... armchair!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/feargal-quinn/you-can-t-do-business-sitting-on-your-armchair/) [Feargal Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/feargal-quinn/) > [“Of what good is an armchair of velvet when the rest of the environment does not match? It is like a man going around…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/s-ren-kierkegaard/of-what-good-is-an-armchair-of-velvet-when-the-rest-of-the/) [Søren Kierkegaard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/s-ren-kierkegaard/) > [“And then one day, you too disappear. Your armchair is still there. But instead of you sitting in it, there is just an empty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eckhart-tolle/and-then-one-day-you-too-disappear-your-armchair-is-still-there-but/) [Eckhart Tolle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eckhart-tolle/) > [“And nobody has the right to judge a soldier from the warmth and safety of their armchair.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-traviss/and-nobody-has-the-right-to-judge-a-soldier-from-the-warmth-and/) [Karen Traviss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-traviss/) ## More by Paul Murray > [“When he gets up he spends an hour kicking and stamping on his French horn so he will not have to play it again.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/when-he-gets-up-he-spends-an-hour-kicking-and-stamping-on-his-french/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“Halley believed that a kiss was the beginning of a story, the story, good or bad, short or long, of an us, and once…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/halley-believed-that-a-kiss-was-the-beginning-of-a-story-the-story/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“History, in the end, is only another kind of story, and stories are different from the truth. The truth is messy and chaotic and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/history-in-the-end-is-only-another-kind-of-story-and-stories-are/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [ “Fascinating ... The whole thing \[the school dance\] seems to work on a similar principle to a supercollider. You know, two streams of opposingly… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/fascinating-the-whole-thing-the-school-dance-seems-to-work-on-a/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“His wife is washed up against him, clinging lifelessly to his arm like seaweed, with no pretense of listening to the priest's small talk.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/his-wife-is-washed-up-against-him-clinging-lifelessly-to-his-arm-like/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“It doesn’t matter where you go though, nowhere feels big enough to contain you, even if you’re right in the middle of the mall…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/it-doesn-t-matter-where-you-go-though-nowhere-feels-big-enough-to/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“-so that for these few moments it actually seems that Ruprecht could be right, that everything, or at least the small corner of everything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/so-that-for-these-few-moments-it-actually-seems-that-ruprecht-could/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“Some bruises you wear like badges of honour: when you got it playing rugby, or quad racing, or falling off something while drunk, no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/some-bruises-you-wear-like-badges-of-honour-when-you-got-it-playing/) [paul murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“For Guido the past, like a Third World country, was merely another resource to be exploited and abandoned when the time comes; and that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/for-guido-the-past-like-a-third-world-country-was-merely-another/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“Life makes fools of us all sooner or later. But keep your sense of humor and you'll at least be able to take your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/life-makes-fools-of-us-all-sooner-or-later-but-keep-your-sense-of/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“...the greatest victories are therefore never without the shadow of loss; every path you take, no matter how lofty or effulgent, aches not only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/the-greatest-victories-are-therefore-never-without-the-shadow-of-loss/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [“The labels on the little bottles and boxes do not tell you which one is the sleeping pill. Instead they have names, long strange…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/the-labels-on-the-little-bottles-and-boxes-do-not-tell-you-which-one/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [Ignoring is what you are supposed to do with bullies, so they get bored and leave you alone. But the problem in school is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/ignoring-is-what-you-are-supposed-to-do-with-bullies-so-they-get/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [To hear people talk, you would think no one ever did anything but love each other. But when you look for it, when you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/to-hear-people-talk-you-would-think-no-one-ever-did-anything-but-love/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) > [Since when has love ever looked for reasons, or evidence? Why would love bow to the reality of things, when it creates a reality…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/since-when-has-love-ever-looked-for-reasons-or-evidence-why-would/) [Paul Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) [Explore all 53 Paul Murray quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/) ## More Advice quotes > [The sensible person is always serious about sensible advice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mak-786/the-sensible-person-is-always-serious-about-sensible-advice/) Mak\_786 > [I ask for tips, for advice. What I have also learnt is that I need to do things that are good for me. In…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matthijs-de-ligt/i-ask-for-tips-for-advice-what-i-have-also-learnt-is-that-i-need-to/) [Matthijs de Ligt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matthijs-de-ligt/) > [Don't get too attached to someone you know you can't be together with.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anurag-prakash-ray/don-t-get-too-attached-to-someone-you-know-you-can-t-be-together-with/) [Anurag Prakash Ray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anurag-prakash-ray/) > [A low-minded person should not be given good advice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chanakya/a-low-minded-person-should-not-be-given-good-advice/) [Chanakya](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chanakya/) > [The worst advice? 'Don't listen to the critics.' I think that you really ought to listen to the critics, because sometimes they're telling you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/the-worst-advice-don-t-listen-to-the-critics-i-think-that-you-really/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [When I was in my twenties and just so sexually prolific, the first time I went to Machu Picchu, this guy, a spiritual teacher,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/woody-harrelson/when-i-was-in-my-twenties-and-just-so-sexually-prolific-the-first/) [Woody Harrelson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/woody-harrelson/) > [The best way to succeed in this world is to act on the advice you give to others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/napoleon-hill/the-best-way-to-succeed-in-this-world-is-to-act-on-the-advice-you/) [Napoleon Hill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/napoleon-hill/) > [Time is priceless. You have it, but you don't own it. You spend it, but you can't keep it. And once it's gone, there's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/time-is-priceless-you-have-it-but-you-don-t-own-it-you-spend-it-but/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [You don't need to take a persons advice to make him feel good, just ask him for it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurence-j-peter/you-don-t-need-to-take-a-persons-advice-to-make-him-feel-good-just/) [Laurence J. Peter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurence-j-peter/) > [Some of the things that we hold onto the most, are the things that we need to let go of.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryaj-ablando-catayas/some-of-the-things-that-we-hold-onto-the-most-are-the-things-that-we/) [Ryaj Ablando Catayas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryaj-ablando-catayas/) > [“If your clothes are enough to drive would-be friends away, they're not the kind of friends you want." Typical mother advice. Sweet, honest, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aprilynne-pike/if-your-clothes-are-enough-to-drive-would-be-friends-away-they-re-not/) [Aprilynne Pike](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aprilynne-pike/) > [“My kingdom not for a horse, but for a good piece of advice!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/my-kingdom-not-for-a-horse-but-for-a-good-piece-of-advice/) [Mehmet Murat ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/) > [I always advise people not to act upon the advice that I give them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikrant-parsai/i-always-advise-people-not-to-act-upon-the-advice-that-i-give-them/) [Vikrant Parsai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikrant-parsai/) > [ \[A\]s you partake of the world's bill of fare, that's darned good advice to follow. Do a lot of spitting out the hot air.… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dr-seuss/a-s-you-partake-of-the-world-s-bill-of-fare-that-s-darned-good-advice/) [Dr. Seuss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dr-seuss/) > [My relationship with Ibrahimovic was completely neutral. He is not the type of player to approach the younger players and give them advice. He…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kingsley-coman/my-relationship-with-ibrahimovic-was-completely-neutral-he-is-not-the/) [Kingsley Coman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kingsley-coman/) [Browse all 8,535 Advice quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/advice/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on imbeciles. I know how hard it is to find the right person, but that’s no reason to exhaustively work your way through all the wrong people. You seem to be living your romantic life by some kind of process of elimination. It’s like matching a Louis Quatorze armchair with one of those plastic patio tables. It simply doesn’t work.” “Oh, I see,” Bel said. “I’m an armchair, is that it?” “A Louis Quatorze armchair,” I qualified. “And my boyfriends are patio tables.” “Actually,” I remembered, “this one’s more like one of those self-assembly Swedish wardrobes.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Paul Murray" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-wasting-your-time-on-imbeciles/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Advice" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-wasting-your-time-on-imbeciles/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c29/paul-murray-12593_advice_i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-w_1000800.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I only meant, you know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on imbeciles. I know how hard it is to find the…” — Paul Murray", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Paul Murray", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-murray/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“I only meant, you know, you...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-wasting-your-time-on-imbeciles/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-murray/i-only-meant-you-know-you-shouldn-t-be-wasting-your-time-on-imbeciles/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```