--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: For a man who finds life tolerable only…" description: "\"For a man who finds life tolerable only by staying on the surface of himself, it is natural to be satisfied with offering no more than his surface to o..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b01/paul-auster-351_commitment_for-a-man-who-finds-life-tolerable-only_2101601.jpg" --- # For a man who finds life tolerable only by staying on the… ![“For a man who finds life tolerable only by staying on the surface of himself, it is natural to be satisfied with offering no more than his surface to others. There are few demands to be met, and no commitment is required. Marriage, on the other hand, closes the door. Your existence is confined to…” quote by Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b01/paul-auster-351_commitment_for-a-man-who-finds-life-tolerable-only_2101601.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b01/paul-auster-351_commitment_for-a-man-who-finds-life-tolerable-only_2101601.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b01/paul-auster-351_commitment_for-a-man-who-finds-life-tolerable-only_2101601.jpg) > “For a man who finds life tolerable only by staying on the surface of himself, it is natural to be satisfied with offering no more than his surface to others. There are few demands to be met, and no commitment is required. Marriage, on the other hand, closes the door. Your existence is confined to a narrow space in which you are constantly forced to reveal yourself – and therefore, constantly obliged to look into yourself, to examine your own depths.” [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Living superficially avoids deep self‑examination; marriage forces confronting one’s inner depths and responsibilities. **In simple terms:** Surface living avoids depth; marriage demands self‑reflection. Key Takeaway Embrace depth, not just surface comfort. Themes identity commitment self‑exploration marriage Mood introspective serious Type literary philosophical When to use this quote - relationships - personal growth - marital life - self‑assessment Key Concepts existentialism psychology Questions to Reflect On - Are you avoiding deeper self‑knowledge? - How does commitment challenge your self‑image? A Different Perspective Surface comfort can become stagnation. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Commitment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/commitment/) [Commitment Required](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/commitment-required-4199741/) [Demand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/demand/) [Depth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/depth/) [Doors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/doors/) [Existence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/existence/) [Existence Confined](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/existence-confined-4199739/) [Hands](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hands/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Looks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/looks/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) [Mets](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mets/) [Natural](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/natural/) [No commitment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/no-commitment/) [Offering](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/offering/) [Required Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/required-marriage-4199740/) [Satisfied](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/satisfied/) [Space](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/space/) [Surface](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/surface/) ## Related quotes > [“Ladies, I beg of you, stop acting like a girlfriend before he's earned it. Stop being his shoulder to cry on, his nurse, his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-delucy/ladies-i-beg-of-you-stop-acting-like-a-girlfriend-before-he-s-earned/) [Jennifer DeLucy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-delucy/) > [A person with half volition goes backwards and forwards, but makes no progress on even the smoothest of roads.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-carlyle/a-person-with-half-volition-goes-backwards-and-forwards-but-makes-no/) [Thomas Carlyle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-carlyle/) > [Equity feminism is a moral doctrine about equal treatment that makes no commitments regarding open empirical issues in psychology or biology.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-pinker/equity-feminism-is-a-moral-doctrine-about-equal-treatment-that-makes/) [Steven Pinker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-pinker/) > [People attain worth and dignity by the multitude of decisions they make from day to day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rollo-may/people-attain-worth-and-dignity-by-the-multitude-of-decisions-they/) [Rollo May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rollo-may/) > [It takes a deep commitment to change and an even deeper commitment to grow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ralph-ellison/it-takes-a-deep-commitment-to-change-and-an-even-deeper-commitment-to/) [Ralph Ellison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ralph-ellison/) > [If loyalty is, and always has been, perceived as obsolete, why do we continue to praise it? Because loyalty is essential to the most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-felten/if-loyalty-is-and-always-has-been-perceived-as-obsolete-why-do-we/) [Eric Felten](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-felten/) > [We must always base our commitment in the center of our own being, or else no commitment will be ultimately authentic.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rollo-may/we-must-always-base-our-commitment-in-the-center-of-our-own-being-or/) [Rollo May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rollo-may/) > [Without involvement, there is no commitment. Mark it down, asterisk it, circle it, underline it. 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The kitten similarly becomes a cat on the basis of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rollo-may/the-acorn-becomes-an-oak-by-means-of-automatic-growth-no-commitment/) [Rollo May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rollo-may/) > [She looks up at me with those vulnerable eyes. “What if it means something?” She asks. “What if it does?” “Promise me it won’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simone-elkeles/she-looks-up-at-me-with-those-vulnerable-eyes-what-if-it-means/) [Simone Elkeles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simone-elkeles/) > [The moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves, too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never have otherwise occurred...unforeseen…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johann-wolfgang-von-goethe/the-moment-one-definitely-commits-oneself-then-providence-moves-too/) [Johann Wolfgang von Goethe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johann-wolfgang-von-goethe/) > [Sport climbing is a lot like sport f\*#king. It's a lot of fun and requires no commitment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-bridwell/sport-climbing-is-a-lot-like-sport-f-king-it-s-a-lot-of-fun-and/) [Jim Bridwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-bridwell/) > [There are only two options regarding commitment; you’re either in or you’re out.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pat-riley/there-are-only-two-options-regarding-commitment-you-re-either-in-or/) [Pat Riley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pat-riley/) ## More by Paul Auster > [“On his best walks, he was able to feel that he was nowhere. And this, finally, was all he ever asked of things: to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/on-his-best-walks-he-was-able-to-feel-that-he-was-nowhere-and-this/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [“No es que escribir me produzca un gran placer, pero es mucho peor si no lo hago.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/no-es-que-escribir-me-produzca-un-gran-placer-pero-es-mucho-peor-si/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [You see, the interesting thing about books, as opposed, say, to films, is that it's always just one person encountering the book, it's not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/you-see-the-interesting-thing-about-books-as-opposed-say-to-films-is/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [I'm not a man deeply interested in technology. 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Every word has to count.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/the-joke-is-the-purest-most-essential-form-of-storytelling-every-word/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [“What people saw when he appeared before them, then, was not really him, but a person he had invented, an artificial creature he could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/what-people-saw-when-he-appeared-before-them-then-was-not-really-him/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [I had made an empirical discovery and it carried all the weight of a mathematical proof.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/i-had-made-an-empirical-discovery-and-it-carried-all-the-weight-of-a/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [As long as there's one person to believe it, there's no story that can't be true.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/as-long-as-there-s-one-person-to-believe-it-there-s-no-story-that-can/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [Writing has always had a tactile quality for me. It's a physical experience.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/writing-has-always-had-a-tactile-quality-for-me-it-s-a-physical/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [People look at the same passage, and one person will say this is the best thing he's ever read, and another person will say…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/people-look-at-the-same-passage-and-one-person-will-say-this-is-the/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [I was very moved to see that the name of the boat was Hamlet - an imaginary character becomes so important to people, we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/i-was-very-moved-to-see-that-the-name-of-the-boat-was-hamlet-an/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [Our lifelong certainties about the world can be demolished in a single second.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/our-lifelong-certainties-about-the-world-can-be-demolished-in-a/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [The ideal reader's the same, and I suppose this person has never had a face or a gender or an age. It's just some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/the-ideal-reader-s-the-same-and-i-suppose-this-person-has-never-had-a/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [“Most lives vanish. A person dies, and little by little all traces of that life disappear. An inventor survives in his inventions, an architect…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/most-lives-vanish-a-person-dies-and-little-by-little-all-traces-of/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) > [“and cut down many trees. When the Humans”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-auster/and-cut-down-many-trees-when-the-humans/) [Paul Auster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) [Explore all 582 Paul Auster quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-auster/) ## More Commitment quotes > [Deepen your existing spiritual commitment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-buettner/deepen-your-existing-spiritual-commitment/) [Dan Buettner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-buettner/) > [We can find common qualities and common values that have made Britain the country it is. Our belief in tolerance and liberty which shines…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gordon-brown/we-can-find-common-qualities-and-common-values-that-have-made-britain/) [Gordon Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gordon-brown/) > [Certainly these are not easy times. But history does not contain very many easy times. Years from now, we will look back at this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-ingraham/certainly-these-are-not-easy-times-but-history-does-not-contain-very/) [Laura Ingraham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-ingraham/) > [Trust is about keeping commitments, but in many instances, circumstances change and organizations therefore shed commitments, things such as retiree medical benefits, pension obligations,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-pfeffer/trust-is-about-keeping-commitments-but-in-many-instances/) [Jeffrey Pfeffer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-pfeffer/) > [“You make me believe in happiness... if I had my way, if anything were up to me, I’d never be without you. You are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/courtney-kirchoff/you-make-me-believe-in-happiness-if-i-had-my-way-if-anything-were-up/) [Courtney Kirchoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/courtney-kirchoff/) > [Golf is such a big commitment, and so is acting. Sometimes you have to give up something to do something else, although, when I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-newton/golf-is-such-a-big-commitment-and-so-is-acting-sometimes-you-have-to/) [Kathryn Newton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-newton/) > [All of the barriers to innovation in the energy sector are arguments for a big commitment to public investment. Only the public sector can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ted-nordhaus/all-of-the-barriers-to-innovation-in-the-energy-sector-are-arguments/) [Ted Nordhaus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ted-nordhaus/) > [When you make a commitment to a relationship, you invest your attention and energy in it more profoundly because you now experience ownership of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barbara-de-angelis/when-you-make-a-commitment-to-a-relationship-you-invest-your/) [Barbara De Angelis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barbara-de-angelis/) > [ “For \[erotically intelligent couples\], love is a vessel that contains both security and adventure, and commitment offers one of the great luxuries of life:… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/for-erotically-intelligent-couples-love-is-a-vessel-that-contains/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [Having a point to start is important. You know that when you decide to write something it's like a commitment. It's like falling in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/isabel-allende/having-a-point-to-start-is-important-you-know-that-when-you-decide-to/) [Isabel Allende](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/isabel-allende/) > [A commitment to lifelong learning is a natural expression of the practice of living consciously.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-branden/a-commitment-to-lifelong-learning-is-a-natural-expression-of-the/) [Nathaniel Branden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-branden/) > [A lasting relationship consists of the 3 C's: Commitment. Communication. Compromise.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nishan-panwar/a-lasting-relationship-consists-of-the-3-c-s-commitment-communication/) [Nishan Panwar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nishan-panwar/) > [I've developed a huge regard for Toyota for its environmental awareness, for its immense commitment to research and development in this field, and for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maurice-strong/i-ve-developed-a-huge-regard-for-toyota-for-its-environmental/) [Maurice Strong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maurice-strong/) > [And the commitment that I've been giving to the Australian people is that there'll be no surprises and no excuses under a Coalition government.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tony-abbott/and-the-commitment-that-i-ve-been-giving-to-the-australian-people-is/) [Tony Abbott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tony-abbott/) > [As a result of reading science fiction when I was eight, I grew up with an interest in music, architecture, city planning, transportation, politics,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-bradbury/as-a-result-of-reading-science-fiction-when-i-was-eight-i-grew-up/) [Ray Bradbury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-bradbury/) [Browse all 4,004 Commitment quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/commitment/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "For a man who finds life tolerable only by staying on the surface of himself, it is natural to be satisfied with offering no more than his surface to others. 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