---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We go on dates thinking that person is…"
description: "\"We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband or wife, without getting to know them, as we live in a fantasy and an illusion of romance.\" —..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg"
---

#  We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband…

![“We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband or wife, without getting to know them, as we live in a fantasy and an illusion of romance.” quote by Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg)

> “We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband or wife, without getting to know them, as we live in a fantasy and an illusion of romance.”

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

People often date with the expectation of marriage, ignoring the need to truly know the person, leading to fantasies and illusion.

**In simple terms:** Dating assumes future marriage without real knowledge.

Key Takeaway

Prioritize genuine connection over idealized expectations.

Themes

dating expectations fantasy illusion

Mood

cautionary thoughtful

Type

advice reflective

When to use this quote

- first dates
- relationship counseling
- personal growth

Key Concepts

marriage mindset relationship building

Questions to Reflect On

- What steps can you take to truly know a partner?
- How can you balance hope with realistic assessment?

A Different Perspective

Idealization can cause disappointment.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Fantasy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fantasy/) [Future husband](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/future-husband/) [Husband](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/husband/) [Illusion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/illusion/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Our future](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/our-future/) [Romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/romance/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) [Wife](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wife/)

## Related quotes

> [I haven't found it to be particularly enjoyable... ninety percent of the time when I go on dates, I'm thinking, 'I could be reading…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zosia-mamet/i-haven-t-found-it-to-be-particularly-enjoyable-ninety-percent-of-the/)

[Zosia Mamet](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zosia-mamet/)

> [Romance is an illusion. Well, romance is not a complete illusion, but it's ephemeral. It does not last.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bette-midler/romance-is-an-illusion-well-romance-is-not-a-complete-illusion-but-it/)

[Bette Midler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bette-midler/)

> [Have I got a black book? Yes, it's called a mobile phone. I do get offers. There is no shortage of people if you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simon-cowell/have-i-got-a-black-book-yes-it-s-called-a-mobile-phone-i-do-get/)

[Simon Cowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simon-cowell/)

> [In a world beyond this one, that river goes on singing sweetly, enchanting us with what we want to hear, shaping what we need…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/libba-bray/in-a-world-beyond-this-one-that-river-goes-on-singing-sweetly/)

[Libba Bray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/libba-bray/)

> [Dear future husband, respect me, support me, don't cheat on our marriage because I am the one who will give birth to our lovely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/dear-future-husband-respect-me-support-me-don-t-cheat-on-our-marriage/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“MacKenzie surveyed the nearly finished quilt. "What's the name of this pattern, Mrs. King?" he asked. "Princess Feather," Jesse answered. Taking LisBeth's hand in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-grace-whitson/mackenzie-surveyed-the-nearly-finished-quilt-what-s-the-name-of-this/)

[Stephanie Grace Whitson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-grace-whitson/)

> [Although still viewed as lovely and alluring by many, Winston Churchill's mother shocked society when at 46 she married a man 20 years her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-sebba/although-still-viewed-as-lovely-and-alluring-by-many-winston/)

[Anne Sebba](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-sebba/)

> [Dear future husband...I will honor you respect you, be your best friend love you &amp; I promise to raise your kids to the best…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/dear-future-husband-i-will-honor-you-respect-you-be-your-best-friend/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [My future husband was becoming to me my whole world; and more than the world: almost my hope of heaven. He stood between me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlotte-bronte/my-future-husband-was-becoming-to-me-my-whole-world-and-more-than-the/)

[Charlotte Bronte](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlotte-bronte/)

> [“Eleanor was a member of one of America’s great families, niece to Teddy Roosevelt and a distant cousin of her future husband. But she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gail-collins/eleanor-was-a-member-of-one-of-america-s-great-families-niece-to/)

[Gail Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gail-collins/)

> [Dear Future Husband,sometimes my emotions get the best of me. I can't help that being a female is so emotionally exhausting.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/dear-future-husband-sometimes-my-emotions-get-the-best-of-me-i-can-t/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“When your heart connects through prayer to the One who is the source of true love, you’ll find that praying for your future husband…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-jones-gunn/when-your-heart-connects-through-prayer-to-the-one-who-is-the-source/)

[Robin Jones Gunn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-jones-gunn/)

> [“Stop fussing,” Legna admonished her, tapping her finger against Isabella’s absently energetic hand. “I’m getting married in a few minutes, Legna, I think I’ve…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacquelyn-frank/stop-fussing-legna-admonished-her-tapping-her-finger-against-isabella/)

[Jacquelyn Frank](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacquelyn-frank/)

> [Dear future husband:)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel/dear-future-husband/)

[Rachel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel/)

> [I particularly enjoy cello music because our daughter plays the cello. I have listened to her practice for so many hours that I am…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beverly-cleary/i-particularly-enjoy-cello-music-because-our-daughter-plays-the-cello/)

[Beverly Cleary](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beverly-cleary/)

## More by Patti Stanger

> [The rich are different. Their wants are very high maintenance. They'll pick eye color and hair color, all the way down to what she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/the-rich-are-different-their-wants-are-very-high-maintenance-they-ll/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [I have a great track record, and I have never been sued. If I can't find someone for someone, I refer them out. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/i-have-a-great-track-record-and-i-have-never-been-sued-if-i-can-t/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [Gays don't have a lot of testosterone. I'm talking about that they use both sides of their brain. Straight men only use one side.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/gays-don-t-have-a-lot-of-testosterone-i-m-talking-about-that-they-use/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [I'm a planner, and most networks don't plan. Bravo doesn't plan. Bravo is lucky in a lot of ways - they've got a lot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/i-m-a-planner-and-most-networks-don-t-plan-bravo-doesn-t-plan-bravo/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [A ring means a commitment. But more than that, it means that you've talked about your shared future and have decided together on a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/a-ring-means-a-commitment-but-more-than-that-it-means-that-you-ve/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [It hit me really hard that I want kids in my life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/it-hit-me-really-hard-that-i-want-kids-in-my-life/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [I think the men in L.A. are very rugged, good-looking. Men in New York look metro with their manis and pedis and their Bruno…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/i-think-the-men-in-l-a-are-very-rugged-good-looking-men-in-new-york/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [We're all getting plastic surgery. Come on, this is the game here, and HDTV exaggerates all the features. Yeah, I'm proud of it, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/we-re-all-getting-plastic-surgery-come-on-this-is-the-game-here-and/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [A lot of Hollywood couples get married young and wind up growing out of their relationship.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/a-lot-of-hollywood-couples-get-married-young-and-wind-up-growing-out/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [Calling is for # Men - Texting is for # Teenagers .](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/calling-is-for-men-texting-is-for-teenagers/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [If I weren't a matchmaker, I'd be a chef.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/if-i-weren-t-a-matchmaker-i-d-be-a-chef/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [I always believe a woman should have 5 non-negotiables that she should stick to when attracting a mate. If the guy does not have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/i-always-believe-a-woman-should-have-5-non-negotiables-that-she/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [I'm a dancer so anything related to dance I love to do. I also tried Zumba last week. That thing is tough! 15 minutes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/i-m-a-dancer-so-anything-related-to-dance-i-love-to-do-i-also-tried/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [Women are smart in business and dumb in love. They won't date outside their zip code, let alone outside the city. They are city…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/women-are-smart-in-business-and-dumb-in-love-they-won-t-date-outside/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

> [Oprah didn't want to put me on the show for a really long time because she thought I was more for the men than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/oprah-didn-t-want-to-put-me-on-the-show-for-a-really-long-time/)

[Patti Stanger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

[Explore all 70 Patti Stanger quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/)

## More Dates quotes

> [I once went on a date where the girl drove and so couldn't drink. I was nervous, so drank quite a bit - it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-smith/i-once-went-on-a-date-where-the-girl-drove-and-so-couldn-t-drink-i/)

[Dan Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-smith/)

> [Exam Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/exam-warning-dates-in-calendar-are-closer-than-they-appear/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [When we produced 'Highway,' Imtiaz Ali and I planned it as a quick small experimental film, while we waited for Ranbir Kapoor's dates later…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sajid-nadiadwala/when-we-produced-highway-imtiaz-ali-and-i-planned-it-as-a-quick-small/)

[Sajid Nadiadwala](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sajid-nadiadwala/)

> [Love is not about sex, going on fancy dates, or showing off. Its about being with a person who makes you happy in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/love-is-not-about-sex-going-on-fancy-dates-or-showing-off-its-about/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Horrible dates are when you're with people who are immature and can't really be comfortable in their own skin.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-mercer/horrible-dates-are-when-you-re-with-people-who-are-immature-and-can-t/)

[James Mercer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-mercer/)

> [“Okay, okay, you win. One-just one- date. But that's all." She didn't look at Josh, just stalked off toward the nearest exit. "Do you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dani-harper/okay-okay-you-win-one-just-one-date-but-that-s-all-she-didn-t-look-at/)

[Dani Harper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dani-harper/)

> [When I'm with my wife, we go on dates and things like that, take our girls out to do stuff.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-evans/when-i-m-with-my-wife-we-go-on-dates-and-things-like-that-take-our/)

[Mike Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-evans/)

> [The military has a very long relationship with Hollywood that dates back to the silent film era.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nick-turse/the-military-has-a-very-long-relationship-with-hollywood-that-dates/)

[Nick Turse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nick-turse/)

> [I can't make people fall in love with Jesus, but I can arrange dates.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-stanley/i-can-t-make-people-fall-in-love-with-jesus-but-i-can-arrange-dates/)

[Andy Stanley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-stanley/)

> [We go on dates I send the Maybach out the neighbourhoods, they never seen it. That shit is dangerous but it so convenient.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/drake/we-go-on-dates-i-send-the-maybach-out-the-neighbourhoods-they-never/)

[Drake](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/drake/)

> [To me, Satyajit Ray is just Manik da. Our relationship dates back to 1958, when he introduced me to the silver screen. I was just 13.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharmila-tagore/to-me-satyajit-ray-is-just-manik-da-our-relationship-dates-back-to/)

[Sharmila Tagore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharmila-tagore/)

> [Have I got a black book? Yes, it's called a mobile phone. I do get offers. There is no shortage of people if you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simon-cowell/have-i-got-a-black-book-yes-it-s-called-a-mobile-phone-i-do-get/)

[Simon Cowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simon-cowell/)

> [Make a list. Score your dates. Market yourself wisely. Find your needle.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-webb/make-a-list-score-your-dates-market-yourself-wisely-find-your-needle/)

[Amy Webb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-webb/)

> [I always have to have sweet and salty. I know some of you are going to say, "Oh, I tried dates. I hate them."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandra-cisneros/i-always-have-to-have-sweet-and-salty-i-know-some-of-you-are-going-to/)

[Sandra Cisneros](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandra-cisneros/)

> [Your mother sets you up blind dates? With guys like that?" The corners of his mouth twitched. "She doesn't like you very much, does…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kelley-armstrong/your-mother-sets-you-up-blind-dates-with-guys-like-that-the-corners/)

[Kelley Armstrong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kelley-armstrong/)

Browse all 328 Dates quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband or wife, without getting to know them, as we live in a fantasy and an illusion of romance.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Patti Stanger"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-our-future-husband-or-wife/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Dates"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-our-future-husband-or-wife/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/patti-stanger-9742_fantasy_we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-o_1615970.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“We go on dates thinking that person is our future husband or wife, without getting to know them, as we live…” — Patti Stanger",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Patti Stanger",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-stanger/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "We go on dates thinking that...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-our-future-husband-or-wife/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-stanger/we-go-on-dates-thinking-that-person-is-our-future-husband-or-wife/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
