---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I deplored silence. I deplored stillness…"
description: "\"“I deplored silence. I deplored stillness. I hated almost everything. I was very unhappy and angry all the time. I tried to control myself, and that on..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fad/ottessa-moshfegh-8200_allusions_i-deplored-silence-i-deplored-stillness_2983988.jpg"
---

#  I deplored silence. I deplored stillness. I hated almost…

![“I deplored silence. I deplored stillness. I hated almost everything. I was very unhappy and angry all the time. I tried to control myself, and that only made me more awkward, unhappier, and angrier. I was like Joan of Arc, or Hamlet, but born into the wrong life—the life of a nobody, a waif…” quote by Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fad/ottessa-moshfegh-8200_allusions_i-deplored-silence-i-deplored-stillness_2983988.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fad/ottessa-moshfegh-8200_allusions_i-deplored-silence-i-deplored-stillness_2983988.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fad/ottessa-moshfegh-8200_allusions_i-deplored-silence-i-deplored-stillness_2983988.jpg)

> ““I deplored silence. I deplored stillness. I hated almost everything. I was very unhappy and angry all the time. I tried to control myself, and that only made me more awkward, unhappier, and angrier. I was like Joan of Arc, or Hamlet, but born into the wrong life—the life of a nobody, a waif, invisible. There's no better way to say it: I was not myself back then. I was someone else. I was Eileen.””

[Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

She felt alienated and unhappy, living a life that didn’t reflect her true self.

**In simple terms:** She was unhappy and felt invisible.

Key Takeaway

Align life with inner identity.

Themes

alienation self‑identity discontent

Mood

melancholic introspective

Type

literary psychological

When to use this quote

- career dissatisfaction
- relationship struggles
- creative blockage
- self‑exploration
- therapy

Key Concepts

existential angst personal authenticity mental health

Questions to Reflect On

- What aspects of yourself feel suppressed?
- How can you reconnect with your authentic self?

A Different Perspective

Changing external circumstances may not resolve inner conflict.

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[Allusions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/allusions/) [Angry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/angry/) [Better way](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/better-way/) [Identity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/identity/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Miserable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/miserable/) [Silence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/silence/) [Wrong life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wrong-life/)

## Related quotes

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> [“They were all so jovial and relaxed with one another, fraternal even. Maybe I was envious of that. They had lives—that was evident.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/they-were-all-so-jovial-and-relaxed-with-one-another-fraternal-even/)

[Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/)

> [“For a moment I felt joyful, and then I felt completely exhausted.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/for-a-moment-i-felt-joyful-and-then-i-felt-completely-exhausted/)

[Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/)

> [It is our business not to supply reality but to invent allusions to the conceivable which cannot be presented.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-francois-lyotard/it-is-our-business-not-to-supply-reality-but-to-invent-allusions-to/)

[Jean-Francois Lyotard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-francois-lyotard/)

> [“Literature is the original Internet – every footnote, every citation, every allusion is essentially a hyperlink to another text, to another mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maria-popova/literature-is-the-original-internet-every-footnote-every-citation/)

[Maria Popova](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maria-popova/)

> [A tragedy can never suffer by delay: a comedy may, because the allusions or the manners represented in it maybe temporary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/horace-walpole/a-tragedy-can-never-suffer-by-delay-a-comedy-may-because-the/)

[Horace Walpole](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/horace-walpole/)

> [I like to borrow forms and quotes and use a lot of allusions, in both poetry and music.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamila-woods/i-like-to-borrow-forms-and-quotes-and-use-a-lot-of-allusions-in-both/)

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> [Thus we have on stage two men, each of whom knows nothing of what he believes the other knows, and to deceive each other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/umberto-eco/thus-we-have-on-stage-two-men-each-of-whom-knows-nothing-of-what-he/)

[Umberto Eco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/umberto-eco/)

> [Never affirm, always allude: allusions are made to test the spirit and probe the heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/umberto-eco/never-affirm-always-allude-allusions-are-made-to-test-the-spirit-and/)

[Umberto Eco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/umberto-eco/)

> [It's a weakness of mine to forget what it is I've just been talking about so that when people make witty allusions to it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-jacobson/it-s-a-weakness-of-mine-to-forget-what-it-is-i-ve-just-been-talking/)

[Howard Jacobson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-jacobson/)

> [“The human egg is a Mrs. Bennet, desperate to marry off her daughters...It is a truth universally acknowledged that a sperm must be in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daryl-gregory/the-human-egg-is-a-mrs-bennet-desperate-to-marry-off-her-daughters-it/)

[Daryl Gregory](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daryl-gregory/)

## More by Ottessa Moshfegh

> [Sometimes I think I'm a nihilist because it doesn't matter, none of this matters. We're all following the will of some unknowable higher power,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/sometimes-i-think-i-m-a-nihilist-because-it-doesn-t-matter-none-of/)

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> [If you look at the horror genre, that work is all about making people uncomfortable by stimulating our fear of death.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/if-you-look-at-the-horror-genre-that-work-is-all-about-making-people/)

[Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/)

> [“...the face I wore at work, my death mask.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/the-face-i-wore-at-work-my-death-mask/)

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> [I've always really enjoyed sharing my work with others. I find it really hard if I don't think the work will exist outside of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/i-ve-always-really-enjoyed-sharing-my-work-with-others-i-find-it/)

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> [Indifference is the saddest state of being. It's like PTSD - you're not gonna fight, you're not gonna run, you're just frozen there, feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/indifference-is-the-saddest-state-of-being-it-s-like-ptsd-you-re-not/)

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[Explore all 82 Ottessa Moshfegh quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/)

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