--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: There is a luxury in self-reproach. When…" description: "\"“There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel that no one else has a right to blame us. It is the confession, not the priest, t..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0e8/oscar-wilde-16_blame_there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach-when_538657.jpg" --- # There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame… ![“There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel that no one else has a right to blame us. It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.” quote by Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0e8/oscar-wilde-16_blame_there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach-when_538657.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0e8/oscar-wilde-16_blame_there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach-when_538657.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0e8/oscar-wilde-16_blame_there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach-when_538657.jpg) > ““There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel that no one else has a right to blame us. It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.”” [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Self‑reproach creates a personal sense of moral authority, making external judgment feel unjustified; the confession itself, not a priest, grants inner forgiveness. **In simple terms:** Blaming yourself gives you control over forgiveness. Key Takeaway Own your mistakes to free yourself. Themes self‑reflection morality authority forgiveness Mood reflective introspective Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - personal growth - conflict resolution - mental health - spiritual practice Key Concepts existentialism psychology ethics Questions to Reflect On - How does self‑blame affect your relationships? - Can you find forgiveness without self‑criticism? A Different Perspective External validation may still influence self‑esteem despite internal absolution. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Confession](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/confession/) [Guilt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/guilt/) ## Related quotes > [“He covered page after page with wild words of sorrow and wilder words of pain. There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/he-covered-page-after-page-with-wild-words-of-sorrow-and-wilder-words/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves we feel no one else has a right to blame us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach-when-we-blame-ourselves-we-feel-no/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/it-is-the-confession-not-the-priest-that-gives-us-absolution/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“There is a luxury in self-reproach.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/there-is-a-luxury-in-self-reproach/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“...telling doesn't help me - it helps you. As Wilde says, It is the confession, not the priest, that gives absolution...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-geddes/telling-doesn-t-help-me-it-helps-you-as-wilde-says-it-is-the/) [John Geddes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-geddes/) > [What is guilt? It is moral self-reproach-I did wrong when it was possible to have done otherwise.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-branden/what-is-guilt-it-is-moral-self-reproach-i-did-wrong-when-it-was/) [Nathaniel Branden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-branden/) > [concessions to adversaries only end in self reproach, and the more strictly they are avoided the greater will be the chance of security.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thucydides/concessions-to-adversaries-only-end-in-self-reproach-and-the-more/) [Thucydides](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thucydides/) > [There is no wretchedness like self-reproach.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/letitia-elizabeth-landon/there-is-no-wretchedness-like-self-reproach/) [Letitia Elizabeth Landon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/letitia-elizabeth-landon/) > [“confession. Now that I have made it, something seems to have gone out of me. Perhaps one should never put one’s worship into words.”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/confession-now-that-i-have-made-it-something-seems-to-have-gone-out/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Who is that man over there? I don't know him. What is he doing? Is he a conspirator? Have you searched him? Give him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/who-is-that-man-over-there-i-don-t-know-him-what-is-he-doing-is-he-a/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [The crude commercialism of America, its materialising spirit, its indifference to the poetical side of things, and its lack of imagination and of high…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/the-crude-commercialism-of-america-its-materialising-spirit-its/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [My dear boy, the people who love only once in their lives are really the shallow people. What they call their loyalty, and their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/my-dear-boy-the-people-who-love-only-once-in-their-lives-are-really/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Boys say its great..boys say its fine... 9 months later boys say its not mine..!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simi-ngr/boys-say-its-great-boys-say-its-fine-9-months-later-boys-say-its-not/) [Simi Ngr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simi-ngr/) > [A love to Christ which is so cowardly and selfish that it is unwilling to proclaim by a public confession its faith in Him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abbott-eliot-kittredge/a-love-to-christ-which-is-so-cowardly-and-selfish-that-it-is/) [Abbott Eliot Kittredge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abbott-eliot-kittredge/) > [If You Love Someone, Be Brave Enough To Tell Them., Otherwise Be Brave Enough To Watch Them To Be Loved By Someone Else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bilal-zahoor/if-you-love-someone-be-brave-enough-to-tell-them-otherwise-be-brave/) [Bilal Zahoor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bilal-zahoor/) ## More by Oscar Wilde > [How else but through a broken heart may Lord Christ enter in?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/how-else-but-through-a-broken-heart-may-lord-christ-enter-in/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [The books that the world calls immoral are the books that show the world its own shame.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/the-books-that-the-world-calls-immoral-are-the-books-that-show-the/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/bachelors-should-be-heavily-taxed-it-is-not-fair-that-some-men-should/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Who, being loved, is poor?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/who-being-loved-is-poor/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Basil my dear boy puts everything that is charming in him into his work. The consequence is that he has nothing left for life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/basil-my-dear-boy-puts-everything-that-is-charming-in-him-into-his/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Anybody can be good in the country](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/anybody-can-be-good-in-the-country/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [I don't at all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It makes me far too conceited.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/i-don-t-at-all-like-knowing-what-people-say-of-me-behind-my-back-it/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Alles Populäre ist falsch.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/alles-popul-re-ist-falsch/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“If these elements of beauty are real, the whole thing simply appeals to our sense of dramatic effect. Suddenly we find that we are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/if-these-elements-of-beauty-are-real-the-whole-thing-simply-appeals/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [To love one's self is the beginning of a life-long romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/to-love-one-s-self-is-the-beginning-of-a-life-long-romance/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/those-who-find-beautiful-meanings-in-beautiful-things-are-the/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Men always want to be a womans first love. Women have a more subtle instinct: What they like is to be a mans last…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/men-always-want-to-be-a-womans-first-love-women-have-a-more-subtle/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Why is it that at a bachelor's establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/why-is-it-that-at-a-bachelor-s-establishment-the-servants-invariably/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Moderation is a fatal thing. Enough is as bad as a meal. More than enough is as good as a feast.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/moderation-is-a-fatal-thing-enough-is-as-bad-as-a-meal-more-than/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Beauty is the only thing that time cannot harm. Philosophies fall away like sand, creeds follow one another, but what is beautiful is a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/beauty-is-the-only-thing-that-time-cannot-harm-philosophies-fall-away/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) [Explore all 3,343 Oscar Wilde quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) ## More Blame quotes > [“I have to blame myself for not finding any way of reaching him, but I can't feel that either Ruth or I had anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/i-have-to-blame-myself-for-not-finding-any-way-of-reaching-him-but-i/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Me mum used to always have the radio on - even now she has it on in every room. Me girlfriend sort of blames…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karl-pilkington/me-mum-used-to-always-have-the-radio-on-even-now-she-has-it-on-in/) [Karl Pilkington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karl-pilkington/) > [I like to praise and reward loudly, to blame quietly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catherine-the-great/i-like-to-praise-and-reward-loudly-to-blame-quietly/) [Catherine the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catherine-the-great/) > [Some of the things that I said I hated to say, but blame yourself mother fucker you made it this way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jedi-mind-tricks/some-of-the-things-that-i-said-i-hated-to-say-but-blame-yourself/) [Jedi Mind Tricks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jedi-mind-tricks/) > [Holy shadows of the dead, I'm not to blame for your cruel and bitter fate, but the accursed rivalry which brought sister nations and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-the-great/holy-shadows-of-the-dead-i-m-not-to-blame-for-your-cruel-and-bitter/) [Alexander the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-the-great/) > [“In places where government priorities and market imperatives create a world so capricious that to help a neighbor is to risk your ability to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katherine-boo/in-places-where-government-priorities-and-market-imperatives-create-a/) [Katherine Boo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katherine-boo/) > [“Stop Blaming Others For Your Own Actions”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexis-g-roldan/stop-blaming-others-for-your-own-actions/) [Alexis G. Roldan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexis-g-roldan/) > [We know from this book entitled... What is it? Surrendered? Succumbed? I can never remember the title perform. And we learn from this book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rush-limbaugh/we-know-from-this-book-entitled-what-is-it-surrendered-succumbed-i/) [Rush Limbaugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rush-limbaugh/) > [I don't blame anyone .. I did this to myself .. It's my fault .. Everything is my FAULT ...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nurnizz95/i-don-t-blame-anyone-i-did-this-to-myself-it-s-my-fault-everything-is/) Nurnizz95 > [“They would congratulate themselves every morning on keeping their integrity, and blame themselves each night for that missed opportunity.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/they-would-congratulate-themselves-every-morning-on-keeping-their/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [I try to live my life where I end up at a point where I have no regrets. So I try to choose the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darren-aronofsky/i-try-to-live-my-life-where-i-end-up-at-a-point-where-i-have-no/) [Darren Aronofsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/darren-aronofsky/) > [How come you don't feel that magic in the air? I guess I knew you'll never be there. I guess I knew you never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/how-come-you-don-t-feel-that-magic-in-the-air-i-guess-i-knew-you-ll/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I am down mentally. I can't understand how it happened and who is to blame? I don't know why the ground was rolled before…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yeasin-khan/i-am-down-mentally-i-can-t-understand-how-it-happened-and-who-is-to/) Yeasin Khan > [A refusal to admit one's mistake & not accepting responsibility for that mistake by blaming everyone else, is d beginning of one's decline.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-refusal-to-admit-one-s-mistake-not-accepting-responsibility-for/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Listen, the guy was not created by coverage from MSNBC and CNN. If you want to blame us for making Donald Trump president because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-tur/listen-the-guy-was-not-created-by-coverage-from-msnbc-and-cnn-if-you/) [Katy Tur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katy-tur/) Browse all 3,779 Blame quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“There is a luxury in self-reproach. 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