--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Long engagements give people the…" description: "\"Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.\" — Oscar Wilde" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg" --- # Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding… ![“Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.” quote by Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg) > “Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.” [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Long courtships allow partners to discover true character, but they can also reveal incompatibilities that make marriage risky. **In simple terms:** Extended dating shows character, yet may expose flaws before commitment. Key Takeaway Beware of prolonged dating without clear intentions. Themes relationships marriage character courtship Mood cautious reflective Type advisory philosophical When to use this quote - dating - engagement - pre‑marital counseling - relationship planning Key Concepts psychology compatibility risk assessment Questions to Reflect On - Is prolonged dating helping or hindering your relationship? - How can you assess character early? A Different Perspective Long engagements may create false security and delay decisive action. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Before marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/before-marriage/) [Character](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/character/) [Engagement](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/engagement/) [Engagements](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/engagements/) [Giving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/giving/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Opportunity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/opportunity/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) ## Related quotes > [“Speak frankly, I am not in favour of long engagements. They give people the opportunity of finding out each other’s character before marriage, which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/speak-frankly-i-am-not-in-favour-of-long-engagements-they-give-people/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“LADY BRACKNELL To speak frankly, I am not in favour of long engagements. They give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/lady-bracknell-to-speak-frankly-i-am-not-in-favour-of-long/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“I've seen more trouble come from long engagements than from any other forms of human folly.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/virginia-woolf/i-ve-seen-more-trouble-come-from-long-engagements-than-from-any-other/) [Virginia Woolf](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/virginia-woolf/) > [The very difference of character in marriage produces a harmonious combination.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/washington-irving/the-very-difference-of-character-in-marriage-produces-a-harmonious/) [Washington Irving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/washington-irving/) > [Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/inspirations-never-go-in-for-long-engagements-they-demand-immediate/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [ I think it's quite common and realistic. There are many stories like this \[in Waitress\]. \[Jenna, my character\] marriage looks really horrible up on… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/keri-russell/i-think-it-s-quite-common-and-realistic-there-are-many-stories-like/) [Keri Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/keri-russell/) > [Personally, I'm an advocate for short engagements. Long sometimes means there is a reason for it. Two years engaged and no wedding... I'd be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-blunt/personally-i-m-an-advocate-for-short-engagements-long-sometimes-means/) [Emily Blunt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-blunt/) > [It's better to have three broken engagements than three divorces.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheryl-crow/it-s-better-to-have-three-broken-engagements-than-three-divorces/) [Sheryl Crow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheryl-crow/) > [“Do I have to celebrate our engagement every year for nothing? I don’t need practice, you know. It’s starting to become cruel”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hilary-grossman/do-i-have-to-celebrate-our-engagement-every-year-for-nothing-i-don-t/) [Hilary Grossman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hilary-grossman/) > [Men keep their engagements when it is an advantage to both parties not to break them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/solon/men-keep-their-engagements-when-it-is-an-advantage-to-both-parties/) [Solon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/solon/) > [Death cancels all engagements.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/max-beerbohm/death-cancels-all-engagements/) [Max Beerbohm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/max-beerbohm/) > [“Many marriages would have been laid to rest a long time ago, if they were not on a life-support machine called other people’s opinions…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/many-marriages-would-have-been-laid-to-rest-a-long-time-ago-if-they/) [Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) > [Engagements - they are like a prayer before eating, best quick.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-mccracken/engagements-they-are-like-a-prayer-before-eating-best-quick/) [Elizabeth McCracken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-mccracken/) > [When you start loving, your character becomes like the positive side of a magnet and the one you love becomes negative, that pulls people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/when-you-start-loving-your-character-becomes-like-the-positive-side/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [After two and a half engagements, of course I want to get married and have babies, so I am going to freeze my eggs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophie-monk/after-two-and-a-half-engagements-of-course-i-want-to-get-married-and/) [Sophie Monk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophie-monk/) ## More by Oscar Wilde > [How else but through a broken heart may Lord Christ enter in?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/how-else-but-through-a-broken-heart-may-lord-christ-enter-in/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [The books that the world calls immoral are the books that show the world its own shame.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/the-books-that-the-world-calls-immoral-are-the-books-that-show-the/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/bachelors-should-be-heavily-taxed-it-is-not-fair-that-some-men-should/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Who, being loved, is poor?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/who-being-loved-is-poor/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Basil my dear boy puts everything that is charming in him into his work. The consequence is that he has nothing left for life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/basil-my-dear-boy-puts-everything-that-is-charming-in-him-into-his/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Anybody can be good in the country](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/anybody-can-be-good-in-the-country/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [I don't at all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It makes me far too conceited.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/i-don-t-at-all-like-knowing-what-people-say-of-me-behind-my-back-it/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Alles Populäre ist falsch.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/alles-popul-re-ist-falsch/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“If these elements of beauty are real, the whole thing simply appeals to our sense of dramatic effect. Suddenly we find that we are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/if-these-elements-of-beauty-are-real-the-whole-thing-simply-appeals/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [To love one's self is the beginning of a life-long romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/to-love-one-s-self-is-the-beginning-of-a-life-long-romance/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [“Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/those-who-find-beautiful-meanings-in-beautiful-things-are-the/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Men always want to be a womans first love. Women have a more subtle instinct: What they like is to be a mans last…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/men-always-want-to-be-a-womans-first-love-women-have-a-more-subtle/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Why is it that at a bachelor's establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/why-is-it-that-at-a-bachelor-s-establishment-the-servants-invariably/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Moderation is a fatal thing. Enough is as bad as a meal. More than enough is as good as a feast.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/moderation-is-a-fatal-thing-enough-is-as-bad-as-a-meal-more-than/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Beauty is the only thing that time cannot harm. Philosophies fall away like sand, creeds follow one another, but what is beautiful is a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/beauty-is-the-only-thing-that-time-cannot-harm-philosophies-fall-away/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) [Explore all 3,343 Oscar Wilde quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) ## More Advisable quotes > [Where large sums of money are concerned, it is advisable to trust nobody.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/agatha-christie/where-large-sums-of-money-are-concerned-it-is-advisable-to-trust/) [Agatha Christie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/agatha-christie/) > [These are the experiences I wish to record in this book, which should really be called The Diary of a Palaeontologist. But in committing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gustav-heinrich-ralph-von-koenigswald/these-are-the-experiences-i-wish-to-record-in-this-book-which-should/) Gustav Heinrich Ralph von Koenigswald > [Marriage is like a three-speed gearbox - affection, friendship, love. It is not advisable to crash your gears and go right through to love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-ustinov/marriage-is-like-a-three-speed-gearbox-affection-friendship-love-it/) [Peter Ustinov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-ustinov/) > [It was under a solemn consciousness of the dangers from ecclesiastical ambition, the bigotry of spiritual pride, and the intolerance of sects... that is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-story/it-was-under-a-solemn-consciousness-of-the-dangers-from/) [Joseph Story](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-story/) > [I believe if you want to convey a complex philosophy, it's advisable to keep it simple: day-to-day lingo.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amish-tripathi/i-believe-if-you-want-to-convey-a-complex-philosophy-it-s-advisable/) [Amish Tripathi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amish-tripathi/) > [In the present state of human society, however, We deem it advisable that the wage-contract should, when possible, be modified somewhat by a contract…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-pius-xi/in-the-present-state-of-human-society-however-we-deem-it-advisable/) [Pope Pius XI](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-pius-xi/) > [When you live with a woman you learn something every day. So far I have learned that long hair will clog up the shower…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-niffenegger/when-you-live-with-a-woman-you-learn-something-every-day-so-far-i/) [Audrey Niffenegger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-niffenegger/) > [I know we promised Haymitch, we'd do exactly what they said, but I don't think he considered this angle.' 'Where is Haymitch, anyway? Isn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/i-know-we-promised-haymitch-we-d-do-exactly-what-they-said-but-i-don/) [Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/) > [Vast quantities of U.S. bombers, tanks and guns have been sent against Ho Chi Minh and his freedom-fighters; and now we are told that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-robeson/vast-quantities-of-u-s-bombers-tanks-and-guns-have-been-sent-against/) [Paul Robeson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-robeson/) > [The only thing that it is advisable to know in any language is the numerals; and even there, you can do a lot with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evelyn-waugh/the-only-thing-that-it-is-advisable-to-know-in-any-language-is-the/) [Evelyn Waugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evelyn-waugh/) > [One had better put on gloves before handling the New Testament. The presence of so much filth makes it highly advisable.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/friedrich-nietzsche/one-had-better-put-on-gloves-before-handling-the-new-testament-the/) [Friedrich Nietzsche](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/friedrich-nietzsche/) > [A seeming ignorance is very often a most necessary part of worldly knowledge. It is, for instance, commonly advisable to seem ignorant of what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lord-chesterfield/a-seeming-ignorance-is-very-often-a-most-necessary-part-of-worldly/) [Lord Chesterfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lord-chesterfield/) > [“Speak frankly, I am not in favour of long engagements. They give people the opportunity of finding out each other’s character before marriage, which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/speak-frankly-i-am-not-in-favour-of-long-engagements-they-give-people/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [We must not think too unkindly even of the east wind. It is not, perhaps, a wind to be loved, even in its benignest…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-hawthorne/we-must-not-think-too-unkindly-even-of-the-east-wind-it-is-not/) [Nathaniel Hawthorne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-hawthorne/) > [Ignoring fame was my rebellion, in a funny way. I was insistent on being normal and doing normal things. It probably wasn't advisable to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emma-watson/ignoring-fame-was-my-rebellion-in-a-funny-way-i-was-insistent-on/) [Emma Watson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emma-watson/) Browse all 59 Advisable quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Oscar Wilde" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/long-engagements-give-people-the-opportunity-of-finding-out-each/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Advisable" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/long-engagements-give-people-the-opportunity-of-finding-out-each/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ca/oscar-wilde-16_advisable_long-engagements-give-people-the-opportu_2769743.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is…” — Oscar Wilde", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Oscar Wilde", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Long engagements give people the opportunity...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/long-engagements-give-people-the-opportunity-of-finding-out-each/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/long-engagements-give-people-the-opportunity-of-finding-out-each/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```