--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Desire for a person is not the same thing…" description: "\"“Desire for a person is not the same thing as having that unique appreciation and need for them, nor is affection. Desire waxes and wanes, and affectio..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5bc/nina-sankovitch-27093_affection_desire-for-a-person-is-not-the-same-thin_1636009.jpg" --- # Desire for a person is not the same thing as having that… ![“Desire for a person is not the same thing as having that unique appreciation and need for them, nor is affection. Desire waxes and wanes, and affection can be felt without long-standing commitment. But 'You matter to me' means that the long haul is accepted, even willingly taken on: I will carry…” quote by Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5bc/nina-sankovitch-27093_affection_desire-for-a-person-is-not-the-same-thin_1636009.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5bc/nina-sankovitch-27093_affection_desire-for-a-person-is-not-the-same-thin_1636009.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5bc/nina-sankovitch-27093_affection_desire-for-a-person-is-not-the-same-thin_1636009.jpg) > ““Desire for a person is not the same thing as having that unique appreciation and need for them, nor is affection. Desire waxes and wanes, and affection can be felt without long-standing commitment. But 'You matter to me' means that the long haul is accepted, even willingly taken on: I will carry you, hold you and applaud you, from here on in. Dependability: I will be here to take care of you. And when you are gone, I will be here to remember you.”” [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A deep, lasting commitment goes beyond fleeting desire or affection, emphasizing dependable support and remembrance. **In simple terms:** Commitment means dependable support and memory. Key Takeaway Offer steadfast support and remember loved ones. Themes commitment dependability love memory Mood reflective empathetic Type advice philosophical When to use this quote - marriage - friendship - caregiving - bereavement Key Concepts relationships emotional labor longterm bonds Questions to Reflect On - How do you show dependability in relationships? - What does “being there” mean to you? A Different Perspective Desire alone cannot guarantee lasting partnership. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Affection](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affection/) [Dependability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dependability/) [Desire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/desire/) [Gratitude](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gratitude/) [Long haul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/long-haul/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) ## Related quotes > [“Dogs know we need to give affection as much as they need to receive it. They were the first therapists; they've been in practice…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/dogs-know-we-need-to-give-affection-as-much-as-they-need-to-receive/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [I was born with an enrmous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-hepburn/i-was-born-with-an-enrmous-need-for-affection-and-a-terrible-need-to/) [Audrey Hepburn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-hepburn/) > [I was born with a enormous need for affection.. And a terrible need to give it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-was-born-with-a-enormous-need-for-affection-and-a-terrible-need-to/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/audrey-hepburn/i-was-born-with-an-enormous-need-for-affection-and-a-terrible-need-to/) [Audrey Hepburn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/audrey-hepburn/) > [Male love circuits get an extra kick when stress levels are high. After an intense physical challenge, for instance, males will bond quickly and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louann-brizendine/male-love-circuits-get-an-extra-kick-when-stress-levels-are-high/) [Louann Brizendine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louann-brizendine/) > [All relationships require affection, desire, tolerance, and the spirit and determination to resolve any issues that ensue.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jayden-hayes/all-relationships-require-affection-desire-tolerance-and-the-spirit/) [Jayden Hayes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jayden-hayes/) > [I desire a person, not a gender.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matthew-c-ehrlich/i-desire-a-person-not-a-gender/) Matthew C. Ehrlich > [“All human beings crave that closeness of another. Its the desire to have one person in the world want to you to be associated…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/miss-gath/all-human-beings-crave-that-closeness-of-another-its-the-desire-to/) [Miss Gath](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/miss-gath/) > [Once a man said to lord buddha - I want happiness…lord buddha replied that first remove that'' I'' that's ego than remove WANT thats…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/raghav-yadav/once-a-man-said-to-lord-buddha-i-want-happiness-lord-buddha-replied/) Raghav Yadav > [“If you desire to be a person of hope, a person who has the will that what is good might be reality, you must…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matthew-kelly/if-you-desire-to-be-a-person-of-hope-a-person-who-has-the-will-that/) [Matthew Kelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matthew-kelly/) > [“Old men need affection as they need the sun.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victor-hugo/old-men-need-affection-as-they-need-the-sun/) [Victor Hugo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victor-hugo/) > [Though men in the mass forget the origins of their need, they still bring wolfhounds into city apartments, where dog and man both sit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/loren-eiseley/though-men-in-the-mass-forget-the-origins-of-their-need-they-still/) [Loren Eiseley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/loren-eiseley/) > [I need to give affection and love, because without that, I wither. I need to give that love to someone. Without that, I'm rudderless.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/les-dawson/i-need-to-give-affection-and-love-because-without-that-i-wither-i/) [Les Dawson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/les-dawson/) > [When young we have a vivid sense of basic values like trust and warm-heartedness, which we tend to neglect in today's competitive world as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dalai-lama/when-young-we-have-a-vivid-sense-of-basic-values-like-trust-and-warm/) [Dalai Lama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dalai-lama/) > [I have a great need for affection from an audience. I don't know whether this is because I had such a tough life when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eartha-kitt/i-have-a-great-need-for-affection-from-an-audience-i-don-t-know/) [Eartha Kitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eartha-kitt/) ## More by Nina Sankovitch > [“And in reading, I discovered that the burden of living is the uneven and unlimited allotment of pain. Tragedy is conferred randomly and unfairly.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/and-in-reading-i-discovered-that-the-burden-of-living-is-the-uneven/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Life is hard, unfair, painful. But life is also guaranteed - one hundred percent, no doubt, no question - to offer unexpected and sudden…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/life-is-hard-unfair-painful-but-life-is-also-guaranteed-one-hundred/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“My hiatus is over, my soul and body are healed, but I will never leave the purple chair for long. So many books waiting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/my-hiatus-is-over-my-soul-and-body-are-healed-but-i-will-never-leave/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“The truth of living is proved not by the inevitability of death but by the wonder that we lived at all. Remembering lives from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/the-truth-of-living-is-proved-not-by-the-inevitability-of-death-but/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Books. The more I thought about how to stop and get myself back together as one sane, whole person, the more I thought about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/books-the-more-i-thought-about-how-to-stop-and-get-myself-back/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“A book isn't just a friend, but makes friends for you”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/a-book-isn-t-just-a-friend-but-makes-friends-for-you/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Words create the stories that become history and become unforgettable.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/words-create-the-stories-that-become-history-and-become-unforgettable/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“We are what we love to read, and when we admit to loving a book, we admit that the book represents some aspect of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/we-are-what-we-love-to-read-and-when-we-admit-to-loving-a-book-we/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“...but I know that I can survive the hard times, taking the worst of what happens to me as a burden but not as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/but-i-know-that-i-can-survive-the-hard-times-taking-the-worst-of-what/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Books are reason to get up in the morning.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/books-are-reason-to-get-up-in-the-morning/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“The value of experience, real or imagined, is that is shows us how to - or how NOT to - live. In reading about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/the-value-of-experience-real-or-imagined-is-that-is-shows-us-how-to/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Because to take someone for granted is a luxury; to have her and not think about losing her or never seeing her again, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/because-to-take-someone-for-granted-is-a-luxury-to-have-her-and-not/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Are you busy?" the caller would ask. "Yes I'm working." Sitting in my chair, cats nearby, I was reading a great book. That was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/are-you-busy-the-caller-would-ask-yes-i-m-working-sitting-in-my-chair/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Remembrance is acknowledging that a life was lived ... My father finally wrote out his memories for a reason. I took on a year…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/remembrance-is-acknowledging-that-a-life-was-lived-my-father-finally/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) > [“Because being witness to all types of human experience is important to understanding the world, but also to understanding myself. To define what is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-sankovitch/because-being-witness-to-all-types-of-human-experience-is-important/) [Nina Sankovitch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) [Explore all 21 Nina Sankovitch quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-sankovitch/) ## More Affection quotes > [My team and I have reunited two elements that coexist with diffiulty: respect and affection, because when they love you they don't respect you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakira/my-team-and-i-have-reunited-two-elements-that-coexist-with-diffiulty/) [Shakira](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakira/) > [Needs cause motivation. Deep-rooted desires for esteem, affection, belonging, achievement, self-actualization, power, and control motivate us to push for what we want and need…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lorii-myers/needs-cause-motivation-deep-rooted-desires-for-esteem-affection/) [Lorii Myers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lorii-myers/) > [“It is to build a house with affection, even as if your beloved were to dwell in that house.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kahlil-gibran/it-is-to-build-a-house-with-affection-even-as-if-your-beloved-were-to/) [Kahlil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kahlil-gibran/) > [In this choice of inheritance we have given to our frame of polity the image of a relation in blood; binding up the constitution…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edmund-burke/in-this-choice-of-inheritance-we-have-given-to-our-frame-of-polity/) [Edmund Burke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edmund-burke/) > [I, measuring his affections by my own, Which then most sought where most might not be found, Being one too many by my weary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/i-measuring-his-affections-by-my-own-which-then-most-sought-where/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [There are a number of qualities which are important for mental peace, but from the little experience I have, I believe that one of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dalai-lama/there-are-a-number-of-qualities-which-are-important-for-mental-peace/) [Dalai Lama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dalai-lama/) > [A lost love. Deny it who will, ridicule it, treat it as mere imagination and sentiment, the thing is and will be; and women…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dinah-maria-murlock-craik/a-lost-love-deny-it-who-will-ridicule-it-treat-it-as-mere-imagination/) [Dinah Maria Murlock Craik](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dinah-maria-murlock-craik/) > [Affection! Affection is false.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-i/affection-affection-is-false/) [Elizabeth I](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-i/) > [We are a spectacular, splendid manifestation of life. We have language. . . . We have affection. We have genes for usefulness, and usefulness…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-thomas/we-are-a-spectacular-splendid-manifestation-of-life-we-have-language/) [Lewis Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-thomas/) > [Listen, I have a great affection and respect for Joe Biden. I think he's been a great vice president. He's taken on a lot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-axelrod/listen-i-have-a-great-affection-and-respect-for-joe-biden-i-think-he/) [David Axelrod](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-axelrod/) > [The still affection of the heart Became an outward breathing type, That into stillness past again, And left a want unknown before; Although the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alfred-lord-tennyson/the-still-affection-of-the-heart-became-an-outward-breathing-type/) [Alfred Lord Tennyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alfred-lord-tennyson/) > [I am persuaded that there is no affection of the human heart more exquisitely pure, than that which is felt by a grateful son…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hannah-more/i-am-persuaded-that-there-is-no-affection-of-the-human-heart-more/) [Hannah More](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hannah-more/) > [If you live in a material universe where acquiring things is very important to you, then family is an absolute deterrent to maintaining that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-taylor-gatto/if-you-live-in-a-material-universe-where-acquiring-things-is-very/) [John Taylor Gatto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-taylor-gatto/) > [Our sweetest experiences of affection are meant to be suggestions of that realm which is the home of the heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ward-beecher/our-sweetest-experiences-of-affection-are-meant-to-be-suggestions-of/) [Henry Ward Beecher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ward-beecher/) > [“Georgia O’Keeffe moved to rural New Mexico, from which she would sign her letters to the people she loved, “from the faraway nearby.” It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-solnit/georgia-o-keeffe-moved-to-rural-new-mexico-from-which-she-would-sign/) [Rebecca Solnit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-solnit/) [Browse all 2,465 Affection quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/affection/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Desire for a person is not the same thing as having that unique appreciation and need for them, nor is affection. 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