--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: As self-possessed as he is, when he’s…" description: "\"“As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with vulnerability… which makes me want to tuck him righ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg" --- # As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working… ![“As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with vulnerability… which makes me want to tuck him right beneath my heart and hold on tight.” quote by Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg) > ““As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with vulnerability… which makes me want to tuck him right beneath my heart and hold on tight.”” [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Even the strongest people show vulnerability when exhausted, inviting intimacy and protection. **In simple terms:** Strength softens with fatigue. Key Takeaway Embrace vulnerability to deepen connections. Themes vulnerability strength intimacy Mood tender intimate Type emotional relational When to use this quote - relationships - leadership - parenting Key Concepts emotional labor human connection Questions to Reflect On - How to balance strength and softness? - When is vulnerability appropriate? A Different Perspective Vulnerability can be misinterpreted as weakness. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Demeanor Softens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/demeanor-softens-1242762/) [Hard Demeanor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hard-demeanor-1242763/) [Hold Tight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hold-tight/) [Possessed Tired](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/possessed-tired-1242761/) [Self Possessed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self-possessed-657483/) [Working too hard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/working-too-hard/) ## Related quotes > [There's no room for demons when you're self-possessed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carrie-fisher/there-s-no-room-for-demons-when-you-re-self-possessed/) [Carrie Fisher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carrie-fisher/) > [“If you are a self-possessed man with a healthy sense of detachment from your bank account and someone writes you a cheque for tens…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-lewis/if-you-are-a-self-possessed-man-with-a-healthy-sense-of-detachment/) [Michael Lewis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-lewis/) > [Jim Stavridis is the former NATO commander who is sometimes on people's lists, also very plausible, self-possessed, someone with sobriety.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-brooks/jim-stavridis-is-the-former-nato-commander-who-is-sometimes-on-people/) [David Brooks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-brooks/) > [Mary Ocher gives me the chills, she frightens me with her feral soul. Her sound is of a true outsider artist, immaculately self possessed.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-o/mary-ocher-gives-me-the-chills-she-frightens-me-with-her-feral-soul/) [Karen O](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-o/) > [“It had to be found, the pristine source in one’s own self, it had to be possessed”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-had-to-be-found-the-pristine-source-in-one-s-own-self-it-had-to-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Carey Mulligan is completely self-possessed. She knows what she's doing, and again, quite like the big-hitters I was talking about, my job was just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olivia-williams/carey-mulligan-is-completely-self-possessed-she-knows-what-she-s/) [Olivia Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olivia-williams/) > [“They say that men who have seen the world, thereby become quite at ease in manner, quite self-possessed in company.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/herman-melville/they-say-that-men-who-have-seen-the-world-thereby-become-quite-at/) [Herman Melville](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/herman-melville/) > [“How often is it the case that, when impossibilities have come to pass and dreams have condensed their misty substance into tangible realities, we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-hawthorne/how-often-is-it-the-case-that-when-impossibilities-have-come-to-pass/) [Nathaniel Hawthorne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-hawthorne/) > [“The truly self-possessed, however, are free from the whims of fate and chance. Calmly, they affect their will, and with strength of character and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-allen/the-truly-self-possessed-however-are-free-from-the-whims-of-fate-and/) [James Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-allen/) > [Research now seems to indicate that one hour of inner action is worth seven hours of out-in-the-worl d action. Think about that. You're working…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-canfield/research-now-seems-to-indicate-that-one-hour-of-inner-action-is-worth/) [Jack Canfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-canfield/) > [Take a break honey, you're working too hard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mazher/take-a-break-honey-you-re-working-too-hard/) [Mazher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mazher/) > [“Of course, there is a little more to it than that. We of the frailer sex have to have some wild hope, something to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-updike/of-course-there-is-a-little-more-to-it-than-that-we-of-the-frailer/) [John Updike](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-updike/) > [Ive seen vampire venom work miracles, but there are conditions that even venom cannot overcome. Her heart is working too hard now; if it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/the-twilight-saga-breaking-dawn/ive-seen-vampire-venom-work-miracles-but-there-are-conditions-that/) [The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/the-twilight-saga-breaking-dawn/) > [“I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cheryl-strayed/i-knew-that-if-i-allowed-fear-to-overtake-me-my-journey-was-doomed/) [Cheryl Strayed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cheryl-strayed/) > [If you have something you do that's unique, you just end up in situations. Your art can take you to places without you working…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/reggie-watts/if-you-have-something-you-do-that-s-unique-you-just-end-up-in/) [Reggie Watts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/reggie-watts/) ## More by Nina Lane > [“He didn't touch me. He could have—he had the perfect reason to—but he didn't. Instead he bent to collect my papers before the breeze…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/he-didn-t-touch-me-he-could-have-he-had-the-perfect-reason-to-but-he/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“So pretty with her long hair and bright eyes. And so pure and damaged at the same time, like a priceless vase threaded with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/so-pretty-with-her-long-hair-and-bright-eyes-and-so-pure-and-damaged/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“Christ Liv, sometimes the way you look at me makes me feel like I can hang the fucking moon.” “Because I’ve always believed you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/christ-liv-sometimes-the-way-you-look-at-me-makes-me-feel-like-i-can/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“And the most valuable lesson I’ve learned will forever live in my heart, right beside my husband. Love the one who proves to you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/and-the-most-valuable-lesson-i-ve-learned-will-forever-live-in-my/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I press my face against her sweet-smelling hair. “You’ll always be my allure.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-press-my-face-against-her-sweet-smelling-hair-you-ll-always-be-my/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I knew I could be everything for him that he was for me. I could heal his wounds, be his anchor, treasure him. Together…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-knew-i-could-be-everything-for-him-that-he-was-for-me-i-could-heal/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I want to grab her and shove her up against the nearest wall. Rip her clothes off and fuck her until the earth trembles…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-want-to-grab-her-and-shove-her-up-against-the-nearest-wall-rip-her/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I put my hands flat on the table. Lean in to look her in the eye. “So she was a student when we met.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-put-my-hands-flat-on-the-table-lean-in-to-look-her-in-the-eye-so/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“Our marriage has always been an island, a safe place where sea-dragons and monstrous creatures can’t reach us. Now we’re letting them in, gnashing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/our-marriage-has-always-been-an-island-a-safe-place-where-sea-dragons/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I didn’t know this kind of love existed, the kind that can both shatter you to pieces and make you whole.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-didn-t-know-this-kind-of-love-existed-the-kind-that-can-both/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“Right now I want you naked against me," Dean says. "I want to wake up cold because you’ve hogged all the blankets. I want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/right-now-i-want-you-naked-against-me-dean-says-i-want-to-wake-up/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I gave you everything I am. Why couldn’t you do the same for me?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-gave-you-everything-i-am-why-couldn-t-you-do-the-same-for-me/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“Sometimes you have to go through the crap to find the good stuff, you know? Shit makes the flowers grow.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/sometimes-you-have-to-go-through-the-crap-to-find-the-good-stuff-you/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“Since the day we met, I haven’t wanted anyone but you, never looked at another woman, never thought about one. It’s always been you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/since-the-day-we-met-i-haven-t-wanted-anyone-but-you-never-looked-at/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) > [“I guess it's fall seven times, get up eight. That's what Liv and Allie always say.' Not all that easy to do, though, when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/i-guess-it-s-fall-seven-times-get-up-eight-that-s-what-liv-and-allie/) [Nina Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) [Explore all 119 Nina Lane quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/) ## More Working too hard quotes > [If you have something you do that's unique, you just end up in situations. Your art can take you to places without you working…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/reggie-watts/if-you-have-something-you-do-that-s-unique-you-just-end-up-in/) [Reggie Watts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/reggie-watts/) > [“I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cheryl-strayed/i-knew-that-if-i-allowed-fear-to-overtake-me-my-journey-was-doomed/) [Cheryl Strayed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cheryl-strayed/) > [Ive seen vampire venom work miracles, but there are conditions that even venom cannot overcome. Her heart is working too hard now; if it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/the-twilight-saga-breaking-dawn/ive-seen-vampire-venom-work-miracles-but-there-are-conditions-that/) [The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/the-twilight-saga-breaking-dawn/) > [“Of course, there is a little more to it than that. We of the frailer sex have to have some wild hope, something to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-updike/of-course-there-is-a-little-more-to-it-than-that-we-of-the-frailer/) [John Updike](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-updike/) > [Take a break honey, you're working too hard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mazher/take-a-break-honey-you-re-working-too-hard/) [Mazher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mazher/) > [Research now seems to indicate that one hour of inner action is worth seven hours of out-in-the-worl d action. Think about that. You're working…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-canfield/research-now-seems-to-indicate-that-one-hour-of-inner-action-is-worth/) [Jack Canfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-canfield/) > [“Septimus has been working too hard" - that was all she could say to her own mother. To love makes one solitary, she thought.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/virginia-woolf/septimus-has-been-working-too-hard-that-was-all-she-could-say-to-her/) [Virginia Woolf](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/virginia-woolf/) > [Samuel Gompers has spent his life trying to keep labor from working too hard and has succeeded beyond his wildest dreams.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/will-rogers/samuel-gompers-has-spent-his-life-trying-to-keep-labor-from-working/) [Will Rogers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/will-rogers/) > [I never helped my kids. I was working too hard. My kids had to be responsible for themselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maye-musk/i-never-helped-my-kids-i-was-working-too-hard-my-kids-had-to-be/) [Maye Musk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maye-musk/) > [I'm not going to complain to New Yorkers about working too hard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ben-elliot/i-m-not-going-to-complain-to-new-yorkers-about-working-too-hard/) [Ben Elliot](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ben-elliot/) > [“We often think burnout is a result of working too hard; more often burnout occurs when people are merely doing more of the same…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/liz-wiseman/we-often-think-burnout-is-a-result-of-working-too-hard-more-often/) [Liz Wiseman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/liz-wiseman/) > [With 'Batman,' I actually had a really bad period when we started 'Zero Year,' right at the beginning, I just wasn't taking care of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-snyder/with-batman-i-actually-had-a-really-bad-period-when-we-started-zero/) [Scott Snyder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-snyder/) > [“In combating cynicism, it helps to know its source. Scratch the surface of most cynics and you find a frustated idealist – someone who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-senge/in-combating-cynicism-it-helps-to-know-its-source-scratch-the-surface/) [Peter Senge](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-senge/) > [What I do regret is working too hard sometimes instead of really enjoying my youth. I'm trying to make an effort to stop and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ser-darius-blain/what-i-do-regret-is-working-too-hard-sometimes-instead-of-really/) [Ser'Darius Blain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ser-darius-blain/) > [“You’d think I’d be excited to get into shape, but I wasn’t. I don’t like to exercise, but not because it’s painful or tiring.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-miller/you-d-think-i-d-be-excited-to-get-into-shape-but-i-wasn-t-i-don-t/) [Donald Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-miller/) [Browse all 35 Working too hard quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/working-too-hard/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with vulnerability… which makes me want to tuck him right beneath my heart and hold on tight.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Nina Lane" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tired-from-working-too-hard-his/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Working too hard" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tired-from-working-too-hard-his/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/nina-lane-3901_working-too-hard_as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tir_2520313.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with…” — Nina Lane", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Nina Lane", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nina-lane/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“As self-possessed as he is, when...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tired-from-working-too-hard-his/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nina-lane/as-self-possessed-as-he-is-when-he-s-tired-from-working-too-hard-his/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```