--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Nancy, you know I’m not really good at…" description: "\"“Nancy, you know I’m not really good at this mothering business,” she says. “You’re a lovely child, the fault is not with you. But motherhood doesn’t c..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33d/nancy-friday-19442_business_nancy-you-know-i-m-not-really-good-at-th_113644.png" --- # Nancy, you know I’m not really good at this mothering… ![“Nancy, you know I’m not really good at this mothering business,” she says. “You’re a lovely child, the fault is not with you. But motherhood doesn’t come easily to me. So when I don’t seem like other people’s mothers, try to understand that it isn’t because I don’t love you. I do. But I’m confused…” quote by Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33d/nancy-friday-19442_business_nancy-you-know-i-m-not-really-good-at-th_113644.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33d/nancy-friday-19442_business_nancy-you-know-i-m-not-really-good-at-th_113644.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33d/nancy-friday-19442_business_nancy-you-know-i-m-not-really-good-at-th_113644.png) > ““Nancy, you know I’m not really good at this mothering business,” she says. “You’re a lovely child, the fault is not with you. But motherhood doesn’t come easily to me. So when I don’t seem like other people’s mothers, try to understand that it isn’t because I don’t love you. I do. But I’m confused myself. There are some things I know about. I’ll teach them to you. The other stuff– sex, love and all that – well, I just can’t discuss them with you because I’m not sure where they fit into my own life. We’ll try to find other people, other women who can talk to you and fill the gaps. You can’t expect me to be all the mother you need. I feel closer to your age in some ways than I do my mother’s. I don’t feel that serene, divine, earth-mother certainty that you’re supposed to that she felt. I am unsure how to raise you. But you are intelligent, and so am I. Your aunt loves you, your teachers already feel the need in you. With their help, with what I can give, we’ll see that you get the whole mother package-all the love in the world. It’s just that you can’t expect to get it all from me.”” [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A mother confesses her inadequacy and uncertainty, promising love and support while acknowledging she cannot fulfill every parental role alone. **In simple terms:** She loves her child but admits she can’t be the perfect mother. Key Takeaway Parenting is a shared, imperfect journey. Themes parenting self-awareness love vulnerability community support Mood reflective hopeful Type personal confession advice When to use this quote - A parent struggling with emotional availability - A caregiver seeking external help for a child’s needs - A family discussing role expectations Key Concepts identity intergenerational dynamics Practical Applications - Encourage open dialogue about parenting limits - Build a support network of mentors Questions to Reflect On - How can families balance love with realistic expectations? - What resources help fill parental gaps? A Different Perspective The speaker’s self‑deprecation may discourage confidence in her caregiving abilities. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Business](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/business/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Good Mothering](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good-mothering-1341884/) [Intelligent Aunt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/intelligent-aunt-1341883/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother/) [Mother Need](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother-need-1125581/) [Motherhood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/motherhood/) [Mothering](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mothering/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Sex Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sex-love/) [Try to understand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/try-to-understand/) ## Related quotes > [“Living the basic good-mothering guidelines enables a mom to blend the responsibilities of parenthood with its joys; to know when to stand her grown…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sue-woodman/living-the-basic-good-mothering-guidelines-enables-a-mom-to-blend-the/) [Sue Woodman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sue-woodman/) > [“We know now that, in mice, attentive mothering leads to better survival of new neurons in the hippocampus—the area that’s so important in regulating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/we-know-now-that-in-mice-attentive-mothering-leads-to-better-survival/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The mom doesn't become sexy; the woman does. 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And how selfish of her, to take off and not tell anyone,”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deanna-lynn-sletten/why-would-her-mother-need-a-break-and-how-selfish-of-her-to-take-off/) [Deanna Lynn Sletten](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deanna-lynn-sletten/) > [“As a mother, you need to remember that a loving and compassionate God is one hundred percent aware of your child’s situation.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-george/as-a-mother-you-need-to-remember-that-a-loving-and-compassionate-god/) [Elizabeth George](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-george/) > [God know that a mother need fortitude and courage and tolerance and flexibility and patience and firmness and nearly every other brave aspect of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-mcginley/god-know-that-a-mother-need-fortitude-and-courage-and-tolerance-and/) [Phyllis McGinley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-mcginley/) > [Sex is like washing your face - just something you do because you have to. Sex without love is absolutely ridiculous. Sex follows love,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophia-loren/sex-is-like-washing-your-face-just-something-you-do-because-you-have/) [Sophia Loren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophia-loren/) > [I think there's a little bit of Erika Jayne in all of us. There's always an over-the-top performance that's part of everyone's life. Erika…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erika-jayne/i-think-there-s-a-little-bit-of-erika-jayne-in-all-of-us-there-s/) [Erika Jayne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erika-jayne/) ## More by Nancy Friday > [Blaming mother is just a negative way of clinging to her still.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/blaming-mother-is-just-a-negative-way-of-clinging-to-her-still/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [I think biologically we are attracted to more than one person, but given society and our needs, monogamy works better.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/i-think-biologically-we-are-attracted-to-more-than-one-person-but/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [I like the company of men. 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It is a controlling idea that holds…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/if-you-believe-in-the-maternal-instinct-and-fail-at-mother-love-you/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [Sexuality is the great field of battle between biology and society.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/sexuality-is-the-great-field-of-battle-between-biology-and-society/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [The debt of gratitude we owe our mother and father goes forward, not backward. What we owe our parents is the bill presented to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/the-debt-of-gratitude-we-owe-our-mother-and-father-goes-forward-not/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [“The primary rule is always that a mother can’t go wrong, ever, by encouraging her child after age one and a half to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/the-primary-rule-is-always-that-a-mother-can-t-go-wrong-ever-by/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [Do women dress for men or women? I’ve always wondered why that eternally provocative question is put in terms of approval - as if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/do-women-dress-for-men-or-women-i-ve-always-wondered-why-that/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [“Our feelings about menstruation are the image of what it is to be a woman in this culture. While menstruation and the fear of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/our-feelings-about-menstruation-are-the-image-of-what-it-is-to-be-a/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [To say something nice about themselves, this is the hardest thing in the world for people to do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/to-say-something-nice-about-themselves-this-is-the-hardest-thing-in/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [To say something nice about yourself, this is the hardest thing in the world for people to do. They'd rather take their clothes off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/to-say-something-nice-about-yourself-this-is-the-hardest-thing-in-the/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) > [Oh, I know all about my mother and me,' you may say. 'All that business with my mother was over years ago.' You don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-friday/oh-i-know-all-about-my-mother-and-me-you-may-say-all-that-business/) [Nancy Friday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) [Explore all 32 Nancy Friday quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-friday/) ## More Business quotes > [Companies with cultures that celebrate diverse opinions and encourage the exchange of ideas have an advantage when solving difficult problems. 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But motherhood doesn’t come easily to me. So when I don’t seem like other people’s mothers, try to understand that it isn’t because I don’t love you. I do. But I’m confused myself. There are some things I know about. I’ll teach them to you. The other stuff– sex, love and all that – well, I just can’t discuss them with you because I’m not sure where they fit into my own life. We’ll try to find other people, other women who can talk to you and fill the gaps. You can’t expect me to be all the mother you need. I feel closer to your age in some ways than I do my mother’s. I don’t feel that serene, divine, earth-mother certainty that you’re supposed to that she felt. I am unsure how to raise you. But you are intelligent, and so am I. Your aunt loves you, your teachers already feel the need in you. With their help, with what I can give, we’ll see that you get the whole mother package-all the love in the world. 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