--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It was simply that I knew, or had known…" description: "\"“It was simply that I knew, or had known, precisely why he did not love all his children equally. Differentiation, variation, appreciation of the uniqu..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc1/n-k-jemisin-1466_children_it-was-simply-that-i-knew-or-had-known-p_994092.jpg" --- # It was simply that I knew, or had known, precisely why he… ![“It was simply that I knew, or had known, precisely why he did not love all his children equally. Differentiation, variation, appreciation of the unique: this was part of what he was. His children were not the same, so his feelings toward each were not the same. He loved us all, but differently…” quote by N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc1/n-k-jemisin-1466_children_it-was-simply-that-i-knew-or-had-known-p_994092.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc1/n-k-jemisin-1466_children_it-was-simply-that-i-knew-or-had-known-p_994092.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc1/n-k-jemisin-1466_children_it-was-simply-that-i-knew-or-had-known-p_994092.jpg) > ““It was simply that I knew, or had known, precisely why he did not love all his children equally. Differentiation, variation, appreciation of the unique: this was part of what he was. His children were not the same, so his feelings toward each were not the same. He loved us all, but differently. And because he did this, because he did not pretend that love was fair or equal, mortals could mate for an afternoon or for the rest of their lives. Mothers could tell their twins or triplets apart. Children could have crushes and outgrow them; elders could remain devoted to their spouses long after beauty had gone. The mortal heart was fickle. Naha made it so. And because of this, they were free to love as they wished, and not solely by the dictates of instinct or power or tradition.”” [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Love is inherently unequal; recognizing and honoring each person’s uniqueness allows authentic, varied connections beyond societal expectations. **In simple terms:** Love isn’t equal, and that’s okay. Key Takeaway Accept differences, love authentically. Themes love individuality freedom Mood thoughtful hopeful Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - Family dynamics - friendships - romantic relationships - parenting - social norms Key Concepts Differentiation authenticity human nature Questions to Reflect On - In what ways does equality limit love? - How can we balance fairness with individuality? A Different Perspective Equality is a noble goal but can suppress genuine affection. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) ## Related quotes > [“She turned towards me, put her fingertips against my chest. She was enjoying it somewhat, too, the little betrayal of Mark's memory. She still…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/glen-duncan/she-turned-towards-me-put-her-fingertips-against-my-chest-she-was/) [Glen Duncan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/glen-duncan/) > [You know how some people seem to think that their love for classical music makes them spiritual or at least something quite special? And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ruth-stout/you-know-how-some-people-seem-to-think-that-their-love-for-classical/) [Ruth Stout](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ruth-stout/) > [I love my children. That will never change. I have prayed to them for forgiveness and hope that they will forgive me. I never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-smith/i-love-my-children-that-will-never-change-i-have-prayed-to-them-for/) [Susan Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-smith/) > [When you are happy and in love and when you have children, then maybe you are beautiful.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emmanuelle-beart/when-you-are-happy-and-in-love-and-when-you-have-children-then-maybe/) [Emmanuelle Beart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emmanuelle-beart/) > [Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things look from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alfie-kohn/most-of-us-would-protest-that-of-course-we-love-our-children-without/) [Alfie Kohn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alfie-kohn/) > [What I learned from my parents is just to be a source of unconditional love for my children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-hoy/what-i-learned-from-my-parents-is-just-to-be-a-source-of/) [Chris Hoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-hoy/) > [I love children. I just don't know if I'm ready to have kids. I feel like I have more time. Kids are cute, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/taylor-schilling/i-love-children-i-just-don-t-know-if-i-m-ready-to-have-kids-i-feel/) [Taylor Schilling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/taylor-schilling/) > [If we can love our children, in spite of the messes they make; our mother, in spite of her tendency to nag; our father,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/glen-rambharack/if-we-can-love-our-children-in-spite-of-the-messes-they-make-our/) [Glen Rambharack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/glen-rambharack/) > [Like many dads I know, I've long been motivated in all aspects of my life by my love for my children - and my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/like-many-dads-i-know-i-ve-long-been-motivated-in-all-aspects-of-my/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I love my children very much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/montel-williams/i-love-my-children-very-much/) [Montel Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/montel-williams/) > [You have to love your children unselfishly. That's hard. But it's the only way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barbara-bush/you-have-to-love-your-children-unselfishly-that-s-hard-but-it-s-the/) [Barbara Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barbara-bush/) > [I hate to confess that I would love to have all of my children in Washington - and at the same time, they've been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-shreve/i-hate-to-confess-that-i-would-love-to-have-all-of-my-children-in/) [Susan Shreve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-shreve/) > [“Here's where I tell you that I love children, and where you look at me skeptically. But I do. I love them for their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/courtney-hodell/here-s-where-i-tell-you-that-i-love-children-and-where-you-look-at-me/) Courtney Hodell > [I would love to have children some day. I'd like little gay boys. That would be good.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lara-stone/i-would-love-to-have-children-some-day-i-d-like-little-gay-boys-that/) [Lara Stone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lara-stone/) > [We receive love — from our children as well as others — not in proportion to our demands or sacrifices or needs, but roughly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rollo-may/we-receive-love-from-our-children-as-well-as-others-not-in-proportion/) [Rollo May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rollo-may/) ## More by N.K. Jemisin > [“Some say the Earth is angry Because he wants no company; I say the Earth is angry Because he lives alone.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/some-say-the-earth-is-angry-because-he-wants-no-company-i-say-the/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [You are Insignificant. One of millions, neither special nor unique. I did not ask for this ignominy, and I resent the comparison. Fine. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/you-are-insignificant-one-of-millions-neither-special-nor-unique-i/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“She feels closer than ever to her father in this moment of utter broken rage.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/she-feels-closer-than-ever-to-her-father-in-this-moment-of-utter/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“When a comm builds atop a fault line, do you blame its walls when they inevitably crush the people inside? No; you blame whoever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/when-a-comm-builds-atop-a-fault-line-do-you-blame-its-walls-when-they/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“I don’t know how I feel about a canon anymore ... The sheer volume of books that exist out there means that a canon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/i-don-t-know-how-i-feel-about-a-canon-anymore-the-sheer-volume-of/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [ “\[...\] the kind of healer who knows that sometimes one must inflict terrible agony - rebreak a bone, carve off a limb, kill the… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/the-kind-of-healer-who-knows-that-sometimes-one-must-inflict-terrible/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [So here is why I write what I do: We all have futures. We all have pasts. We all have stories. And we all,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/so-here-is-why-i-write-what-i-do-we-all-have-futures-we-all-have/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“How can we prepare for the future if we won’t acknowledge the past?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/how-can-we-prepare-for-the-future-if-we-won-t-acknowledge-the-past/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“You waver, because you don’t really want to know … but you haven’t been a coward for some years now. So you steel yourself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/you-waver-because-you-don-t-really-want-to-know-but-you-haven-t-been/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“What can orogeny do against something like that? Keep her breathing, maybe. But breathing doesn't always mean living, and maybe... maybe genocide doesn't always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/what-can-orogeny-do-against-something-like-that-keep-her-breathing/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“What the rust do you matter? Who cares about you? Well, that’s the thing, isn’t it? Once, you did have people who cared about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/what-the-rust-do-you-matter-who-cares-about-you-well-that-s-the-thing/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“Let me say only that these vehicles float a few inches off the ground. No animals draw them. No steam or chemical fuels them.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/let-me-say-only-that-these-vehicles-float-a-few-inches-off-the-ground/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [We can never be gods, after all--but we can become something less than human with frightening ease.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/we-can-never-be-gods-after-all-but-we-can-become-something-less-than/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“(This is not a digression.)”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/this-is-not-a-digression/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“He's not a parasite if she needs him, too, and if she gives what he will not take. (One day soon, she will learn…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/he-s-not-a-parasite-if-she-needs-him-too-and-if-she-gives-what-he/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) [Explore all 225 N.K. Jemisin quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) ## More Children quotes > [I am certain that children always know more than they are able to tell, and that makes the big difference between them and adults,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacques-lusseyran/i-am-certain-that-children-always-know-more-than-they-are-able-to/) [Jacques Lusseyran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacques-lusseyran/) > [Behind every successful child is an adult who believed in him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-warren/behind-every-successful-child-is-an-adult-who-believed-in-him/) [Rick Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-warren/) > [I believe in freedom to do what you want if you aren't hurting others, but pictures of obese protesters giving their children big gulps.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-defranco/i-believe-in-freedom-to-do-what-you-want-if-you-aren-t-hurting-others/) [Philip DeFranco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-defranco/) > [If the audience likes your work, if they like you, they don't think whether you are married or have children or not. I made…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dimple-kapadia/if-the-audience-likes-your-work-if-they-like-you-they-don-t-think/) [Dimple Kapadia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dimple-kapadia/) > [It doesnt seem to me strange that children should like the macabre, the sensational, and the forbidden.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-hecht/it-doesnt-seem-to-me-strange-that-children-should-like-the-macabre/) [Anthony Hecht](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-hecht/) > [Let children support their parents or be imprisoned.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/let-children-support-their-parents-or-be-imprisoned/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Gratitude isn't just a feeling, it's an action. Expressing gratitude by writing in a journal, taking a photo, or shooting a video creates a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janice-kaplan/gratitude-isn-t-just-a-feeling-it-s-an-action-expressing-gratitude-by/) [Janice Kaplan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janice-kaplan/) > [My embarrassing confession is that my father is a 'Camelot: The Musical' obsessive. So as a child, when we were going to visit relatives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-chibnall/my-embarrassing-confession-is-that-my-father-is-a-camelot-the-musical/) [Chris Chibnall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-chibnall/) > [I have many who keep me going, I am very fortunate in this sense. There is nothing like a child who knows more about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/floyd-cooper/i-have-many-who-keep-me-going-i-am-very-fortunate-in-this-sense-there/) [Floyd Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/floyd-cooper/) > [My school was one of the most beautiful places a child can grow up in. 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I would see it as my failure as a parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/salman-rushdie/if-my-child-had-prejudice-in-his-head-i-d-be-ashamed-i-would-see-it/) [Salman Rushdie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/salman-rushdie/) > [“Children's lives are always beginning and adults' lives are always ending. Or is it the opposite? 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And because he did this, because he did not pretend that love was fair or equal, mortals could mate for an afternoon or for the rest of their lives. Mothers could tell their twins or triplets apart. Children could have crushes and outgrow them; elders could remain devoted to their spouses long after beauty had gone. The mortal heart was fickle. Naha made it so. And because of this, they were free to love as they wished, and not solely by the dictates of instinct or power or tradition.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "N.K. 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