--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman…" description: "\"Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he means that he wants her to help him love himself, and if, blinded by her own feeling, she ta..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png" --- # Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he… ![“Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he means that he wants her to help him love himself, and if, blinded by her own feeling, she takes him for her captain, her pleasure craft becomes a pirate ship, the colours change to a black flag with a sinister sign, and her inevitable…” quote by Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png) > “Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he means that he wants her to help him love himself, and if, blinded by her own feeling, she takes him for her captain, her pleasure craft becomes a pirate ship, the colours change to a black flag with a sinister sign, and her inevitable destiny is the coral reef.” [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A marriage proposal can mask a desire for self‑love, leading to a relationship that becomes destructive if the partner loses self‑identity. **In simple terms:** Marriage can hide personal insecurities. Key Takeaway Seek self‑awareness before commitment. Themes relationships self‑esteem power dynamics Mood cautionary melancholic Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - counseling sessions - relationship workshops - personal reflection - literary analysis Key Concepts psychology of love identity loss Questions to Reflect On - What personal needs drive your desire for partnership? - How can partners support each other's self‑growth? A Different Perspective Not all proposals are altruistic; motives can be complex. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Asks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asks/) [Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/black/) [Blinded](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blinded/) [Captains](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/captains/) [Colour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/colour/) [Coral reefs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/coral-reefs/) [Crafts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/crafts/) [Destiny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/destiny/) [Feelings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feelings/) [Flags](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/flags/) [Help Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/help-love/) [Helping](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/helping/) [Ifs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/) [Inevitable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inevitable/) [Marry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marry/) [Marry Means](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marry-means-2124677/) [Mean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mean/) [Means Wants](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/means-wants-2373844/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) [Pirate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pirate/) [Pirate ships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pirate-ships/) [Pleasure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pleasure/) [Reefs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reefs/) [Ships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ships/) [Sinister](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sinister/) [Want](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/want/) [Woman Marry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/woman-marry-310202/) ## Related quotes > [We still have 10 percent of the sharks. We still have half of the coral reefs. However, if we wait another 50 years, opportunities…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-earle/we-still-have-10-percent-of-the-sharks-we-still-have-half-of-the/) [Sylvia Earle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-earle/) > [I build a book the way coral reefs are built: millions of little calcareous skeletons piling up one atop another, though in my case…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/i-build-a-book-the-way-coral-reefs-are-built-millions-of-little/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [I'm actually getting to the stage where places I travelled to for the first time in the early 1990s are now unrecognisable. I go…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-backshall/i-m-actually-getting-to-the-stage-where-places-i-travelled-to-for-the/) [Steve Backshall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-backshall/) > [We have changed. We are no longer, as I said, bipedal monkeys. We are instead a kind of cybernetic coral reef of organic components…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terence-mckenna/we-have-changed-we-are-no-longer-as-i-said-bipedal-monkeys-we-are/) [Terence McKenna](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terence-mckenna/) > [ Are coral reefs growing from the depths of the oceans? ... \[The\] reply is a simple negative; and a single fact establishes its truth.… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-dwight-dana/are-coral-reefs-growing-from-the-depths-of-the-oceans-the-reply-is-a/) [James Dwight Dana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-dwight-dana/) > [We cannot afford to continue losing our coral reefs, which are suffering from a number of threats such as warmer temperatures, more acidic waters,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mazie-hirono/we-cannot-afford-to-continue-losing-our-coral-reefs-which-are/) [Mazie Hirono](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mazie-hirono/) > [In the year 2007, seals, otters, lions, turtles, frogs, apes, snakes, butterflies, polar bears, cheetahs, whales are disappearing along with their variously furnished homes:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eban-goodstein/in-the-year-2007-seals-otters-lions-turtles-frogs-apes-snakes/) [Eban Goodstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eban-goodstein/) > [Think about this: If water is the blood of our planet flowing through veinous rivers, streams, and into our oceans, what does that make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ian-somerhalder/think-about-this-if-water-is-the-blood-of-our-planet-flowing-through/) [Ian Somerhalder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ian-somerhalder/) > [I kind of build a novel the way marine polyps build a coral reef, it's millions and millions of little precarious bodies stacked on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/i-kind-of-build-a-novel-the-way-marine-polyps-build-a-coral-reef-it-s/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [History's political and economic power structures have always abhorred 'idle people' as potential troublemakers. Yet nature never abhors seemingly idle trees, grass, snails, coral…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-buckminster-fuller/history-s-political-and-economic-power-structures-have-always/) [R. Buckminster Fuller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-buckminster-fuller/) > [And so the Word had breath, and wrought With human hands the creed of creeds In loveliness of perfect deeds, More strong than all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alfred-lord-tennyson/and-so-the-word-had-breath-and-wrought-with-human-hands-the-creed-of/) [Alfred Lord Tennyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alfred-lord-tennyson/) > [Water can be a blessing or a curse. Too often we make conservation about saving a whale, a coral reef or a marsh. But…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexandra-cousteau/water-can-be-a-blessing-or-a-curse-too-often-we-make-conservation/) [Alexandra Cousteau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexandra-cousteau/) > [ There are ecosystems like coral reefs \[at risk\] through ocean acidification. Those are valuable things that we should protect. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-gates/there-are-ecosystems-like-coral-reefs-at-risk-through-ocean/) [Bill Gates](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-gates/) > [Coral reefs represent some of the worlds most spectacular beauty spots, but they are also the foundation of marine life: without them many of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheherazade-goldsmith/coral-reefs-represent-some-of-the-worlds-most-spectacular-beauty/) [Sheherazade Goldsmith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheherazade-goldsmith/) > [The creatures of the sea hold special mystery, and they are among the most exciting, graceful, and beautiful on Earth. Just consider the living…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-safina/the-creatures-of-the-sea-hold-special-mystery-and-they-are-among-the/) [Carl Safina](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-safina/) ## More by Myrtle Reed > [When a little pleasure has flashed for a moment against the dark, I have made that jewel mine. I have hundreds of them ...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/when-a-little-pleasure-has-flashed-for-a-moment-against-the-dark-i/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [marriage is a great strain upon love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/marriage-is-a-great-strain-upon-love/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [The appointed thing comes at the appointed time in the appointed way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/the-appointed-thing-comes-at-the-appointed-time-in-the-appointed-way/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Revolution is obstructed evolution.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/revolution-is-obstructed-evolution/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Pedestals are always lonely.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/pedestals-are-always-lonely/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [When we get civilised, I believe children will go by number until they get old enough to choose their own names.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/when-we-get-civilised-i-believe-children-will-go-by-number-until-they/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Love is an orchid which thrives principally on hot air.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/love-is-an-orchid-which-thrives-principally-on-hot-air/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Lots of people think they're charitable if they give away their old clothes and things they don't want.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/lots-of-people-think-they-re-charitable-if-they-give-away-their-old/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [All we can do in this world is the thing that seems to us the best. We have no concern with the results, except…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/all-we-can-do-in-this-world-is-the-thing-that-seems-to-us-the-best-we/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Sins of commission are far more productive of happiness than the sins of omission.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/sins-of-commission-are-far-more-productive-of-happiness-than-the-sins/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Legislation may at times be disobeyed, but never law, for the breaking brings swift punishment of its own.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/legislation-may-at-times-be-disobeyed-but-never-law-for-the-breaking/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Home is a place where we all do as we please - usually regardless of the others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/home-is-a-place-where-we-all-do-as-we-please-usually-regardless-of/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [The things that are ours cannot be given away, or taken away, or lost. We break our hearts, all of us, trying to keep…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/the-things-that-are-ours-cannot-be-given-away-or-taken-away-or-lost/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [Womankind suffers from three delusions: marriage will reform a man, a rejected lover is heartbroken for life, and if the other women were only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/womankind-suffers-from-three-delusions-marriage-will-reform-a-man-a/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) > [I've always thought my flowers had souls.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/i-ve-always-thought-my-flowers-had-souls/) [Myrtle Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) [Explore all 103 Myrtle Reed quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/) ## More Asks quotes > [If you ask an introvert a question, wait until she thinks about it. Introverts think before speaking, not through speaking. If you want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurie-helgoe/if-you-ask-an-introvert-a-question-wait-until-she-thinks-about-it/) [Laurie Helgoe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurie-helgoe/) > [I don't wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same. So if somebody asks me what time it is, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-hedberg/i-don-t-wear-a-watch-because-i-want-my-arms-to-weigh-the-same-so-if/) [Mitch Hedberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-hedberg/) > [I am a practicing Catholic, but my lineage is Jewish, so if someone asks me if I'm Jewish, I say yes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neve-campbell/i-am-a-practicing-catholic-but-my-lineage-is-jewish-so-if-someone/) [Neve Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neve-campbell/) > [Freedom in every sense but primarily political sense, a rise in repression that stems from a repression of sexuality. It's AIDS, it's herpes, it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-nicholson/freedom-in-every-sense-but-primarily-political-sense-a-rise-in/) [Jack Nicholson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-nicholson/) > [Why did Erich von Stronheim leave Germany? Why did Hitchcock leave England? If you were a director you'd like to work in Hollywood too.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roman-polanski/why-did-erich-von-stronheim-leave-germany-why-did-hitchcock-leave/) [Roman Polanski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roman-polanski/) > [There is nothing more I ask of this life than this moment, exactly so. And suddenly forever seems like too short a time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-andreas/there-is-nothing-more-i-ask-of-this-life-than-this-moment-exactly-so/) [Brian Andreas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-andreas/) > [Success will come when the societal attitude changes and not a single woman in America asks herself the question 'What did I do?'.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-biden/success-will-come-when-the-societal-attitude-changes-and-not-a-single/) [Joe Biden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-biden/) > [The most fundamental question we can ever ask ourselves is whether or not the universe we live in is friendly or hostile.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-einstein/the-most-fundamental-question-we-can-ever-ask-ourselves-is-whether-or/) [Albert Einstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-einstein/) > [The rich people are apparently leaving America. They're giving up their citizenship. These great lovers of America who made their money in this country-when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bernie-sanders/the-rich-people-are-apparently-leaving-america-they-re-giving-up/) [Bernie Sanders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bernie-sanders/) > [There is a way to be a woman, ask for what we deserve and be able to negotiate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracee-ellis-ross/there-is-a-way-to-be-a-woman-ask-for-what-we-deserve-and-be-able-to/) [Tracee Ellis Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tracee-ellis-ross/) > [For someone to ask 'Who did you play for' and to be able to answer a single name 'Liverpool' that would be brilliant...I don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamie-carragher/for-someone-to-ask-who-did-you-play-for-and-to-be-able-to-answer-a/) [Jamie Carragher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamie-carragher/) > [I have no hesitation in saying that although the American woman never leaves her domestic sphere and is in some respects very dependent within…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexis-de-tocqueville/i-have-no-hesitation-in-saying-that-although-the-american-woman-never/) [Alexis de Tocqueville](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexis-de-tocqueville/) > [Ask God for temp'rance. That's th' appliance only Which your disease requires.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/ask-god-for-temp-rance-that-s-th-appliance-only-which-your-disease/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [I don't know how to say it exactly. Only...I want to die as myself. Does that make any sense?' he asks. I shake my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/i-don-t-know-how-to-say-it-exactly-only-i-want-to-die-as-myself-does/) [Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/) > [Physicist Isador Isaac Rabi, who won a Nobel Prize for inventing a technique that permitted scientists to probe the structure of atoms and molecules…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-saul-wurman/physicist-isador-isaac-rabi-who-won-a-nobel-prize-for-inventing-a/) [Richard Saul Wurman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-saul-wurman/) [Browse all 7,138 Asks quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asks/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he means that he wants her to help him love himself, and if, blinded by her own feeling, she takes him for her captain, her pleasure craft becomes a pirate ship, the colours change to a black flag with a sinister sign, and her inevitable destiny is the coral reef.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Myrtle Reed" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman-to-marry-him-he-means-that/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Asks" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman-to-marry-him-he-means-that/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d5/myrtle-reed-5134_asks_not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman_1847209.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Not infrequently, when a man asks a woman to marry him, he means that he wants her to help him love himself…” — Myrtle Reed", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Myrtle Reed", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/myrtle-reed/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Not infrequently, when a man asks...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman-to-marry-him-he-means-that/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/myrtle-reed/not-infrequently-when-a-man-asks-a-woman-to-marry-him-he-means-that/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```