---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It's hard for black women to ask for…"
description: "\"It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we don't need it. We're used to being in pain and living with it.\" — Morgan Parker"
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg"
---

#  It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we…

![“It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we don't need it. We're used to being in pain and living with it.” quote by Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg)

> “It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we don't need it. We're used to being in pain and living with it.”

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Black women often internalize self-reliance, making it hard to seek assistance despite chronic hardship.

**In simple terms:** Black women avoid asking for help despite pain.

Key Takeaway

Recognize and share your needs.

Themes

identity self-reliance mental health gender race

Mood

reflective empathetic

Type

personal social

When to use this quote

- workplace
- healthcare
- community support
- friendship

Key Concepts

systemic oppression resilience social expectations

Questions to Reflect On

- How can you safely request support?
- What barriers keep you from seeking help?

A Different Perspective

Cultural norms may discourage vulnerability.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Black women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/black-women/) [Pain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pain/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/)

## Related quotes

> [“When you refuse to ask for help, it tells others that they also shouldn't ask for help from you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-lu/when-you-refuse-to-ask-for-help-it-tells-others-that-they-also/)

[Marie Lu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-lu/)

> [“I didn’t tell the story to ask for help because I knew there was no help.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/china-mi-ville/i-didn-t-tell-the-story-to-ask-for-help-because-i-knew-there-was-no/)

[China Miéville](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/china-mi-ville/)

> [I wanna say to anybody that's trying to come up and go viral, push forward. Don't stop. Don't wait for nobody. Do it yourself.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fivio-foreign/i-wanna-say-to-anybody-that-s-trying-to-come-up-and-go-viral-push/)

[Fivio Foreign](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fivio-foreign/)

> [“Be strong enough to stand on your own two feet, but wise enough to know when to ask for help.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-sonnenberg/be-strong-enough-to-stand-on-your-own-two-feet-but-wise-enough-to/)

[Frank Sonnenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-sonnenberg/)

> [“You can’t do everything for everyone, not even for yourself. It’s okay to ask for help when you need it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/you-can-t-do-everything-for-everyone-not-even-for-yourself-it-s-okay/)

[Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/)

> [Ask for help. Not because you are weak. But because you want to remain strong.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/les-brown/ask-for-help-not-because-you-are-weak-but-because-you-want-to-remain/)

[Les Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/les-brown/)

> [The best advice I can give to anyone going through a rough patch is to never be afraid to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demi-lovato/the-best-advice-i-can-give-to-anyone-going-through-a-rough-patch-is/)

[Demi Lovato](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demi-lovato/)

> [Ask for help when you need it. Even from your parents. There is no shame in needing help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/ask-for-help-when-you-need-it-even-from-your-parents-there-is-no/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [One of the biggest defects in life is the inability to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-kiyosaki/one-of-the-biggest-defects-in-life-is-the-inability-to-ask-for-help/)

[Robert Kiyosaki](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-kiyosaki/)

> [When you ask for help listen. It's one thing to ask the question and it's another thing to listen to the answer. Many people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-zukav/when-you-ask-for-help-listen-it-s-one-thing-to-ask-the-question-and/)

[Gary Zukav](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-zukav/)

> [“I learned that when you ask for help it will always be given. If you try to work with spirit then they will always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-rathore/i-learned-that-when-you-ask-for-help-it-will-always-be-given-if-you/)

[Michelle Rathore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-rathore/)

> [In American culture at large, but especially in African American culture, it's a sign of weakness to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/in-american-culture-at-large-but-especially-in-african-american/)

[Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/)

> [“Most of those who think their strength is gone and ask for help from others do not know that the strength that seems to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/most-of-those-who-think-their-strength-is-gone-and-ask-for-help-from/)

[Mehmet Murat ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/)

> [Don't be ashamed to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/don-t-be-ashamed-to-ask-for-help/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Is that you? When you fail, are you too humiliated or ashamed to ask for help? When you suffer, are you too embarrassed to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/art-berg/is-that-you-when-you-fail-are-you-too-humiliated-or-ashamed-to-ask/)

[Art Berg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/art-berg/)

## More by Morgan Parker

> [It's always hard for me to find a therapist who is a black woman or even a woman of color. It's something that we've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/it-s-always-hard-for-me-to-find-a-therapist-who-is-a-black-woman-or/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [ I liked the idea of using this mega-star \[Beyoncé \] to talk about all those things on the tiny scale of my life. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/i-liked-the-idea-of-using-this-mega-star-beyonc-to-talk-about-all/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [I think that we need to make it our goal to define freedom for ourselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/i-think-that-we-need-to-make-it-our-goal-to-define-freedom-for/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“I admired how perfectly matched they seemed to be, and I started to wonder about my own, personal definition of love. Had it been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/i-admired-how-perfectly-matched-they-seemed-to-be-and-i-started-to/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“Writers are always scrapping one word for a better one. Regular people just say stuff, they don't replace there words ever. Its the only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/writers-are-always-scrapping-one-word-for-a-better-one-regular-people/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [ The book \[There are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé?\] is quite complex, and I was worried that it would be marketed as one-sided or… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/the-book-there-are-more-beautiful-things-than-beyonc-is-quite-complex/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [We kind of have to rewrite our own stories and our own ways of being free.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/we-kind-of-have-to-rewrite-our-own-stories-and-our-own-ways-of-being/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“...Love isn't a heart condition. It's not even an emotional one. It's just a four-letter word we want to use when we want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/love-isn-t-a-heart-condition-it-s-not-even-an-emotional-one-it-s-just/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“A non-fucking fuck-friend, I guess. A non-friction friend.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/a-non-fucking-fuck-friend-i-guess-a-non-friction-friend/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“All you’ve done is remind me of what an asshole you are.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/all-you-ve-done-is-remind-me-of-what-an-asshole-you-are/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“I am a dreamer with empty hands and I like the chill.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/i-am-a-dreamer-with-empty-hands-and-i-like-the-chill/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“You're a writer, though. Your words are malleable, replaceable, and by definition untrustworthy. they mean nothing to you and that's what I'm afraid I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/you-re-a-writer-though-your-words-are-malleable-replaceable-and-by/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [There was something about Beyoncé that felt like a vessel, I guess, that I could kind of impose all of these feelings and thoughts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/there-was-something-about-beyonc-that-felt-like-a-vessel-i-guess-that/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [Where I would usually backspace, I stop and say, "You know what? This is important, that I say how I feel and don't sugarcoat…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/where-i-would-usually-backspace-i-stop-and-say-you-know-what-this-is/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

> [“i believe that “love” is not about forgiveness, it’s about acceptance, and acceptance keeps relationships alive.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/i-believe-that-love-is-not-about-forgiveness-it-s-about-acceptance/)

[Morgan Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

[Explore all 99 Morgan Parker quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/)

## More Ask for help quotes

> [“What do we do in the dark night? We do nothing. We wait. We remember that we are not God. We hold on. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ortberg/what-do-we-do-in-the-dark-night-we-do-nothing-we-wait-we-remember/)

[John Ortberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ortberg/)

> [“When you refuse to ask for help, it tells others that they also shouldn't ask for help from you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-lu/when-you-refuse-to-ask-for-help-it-tells-others-that-they-also/)

[Marie Lu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-lu/)

> [Strength wasn‘t about being able to do everything alone. Strength was knowing when to ask for help and not being too proud to do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/strength-wasn-t-about-being-able-to-do-everything-alone-strength-was/)

[Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/)

> [Don't be ashamed to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/don-t-be-ashamed-to-ask-for-help/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Any fool that had once helped you will someday make known to everyone that you were once a needy. No matter how broke you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-bassey-johnson/any-fool-that-had-once-helped-you-will-someday-make-known-to-everyone/)

[Michael Bassey Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-bassey-johnson/)

> [“Is this okay with you, Jenna? For him to stay here?" "Yeah," I said. "It's good. You have no idea what it takes for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sara-zarr/is-this-okay-with-you-jenna-for-him-to-stay-here-yeah-i-said-it-s/)

[Sara Zarr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sara-zarr/)

> [“Weep and ask for help. Lean on me with your runny nose. Cry when you feel like crying. Laugh when you feel like laughing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sorachi-hideaki/weep-and-ask-for-help-lean-on-me-with-your-runny-nose-cry-when-you/)

[Sorachi Hideaki](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sorachi-hideaki/)

> [“Most of those who think their strength is gone and ask for help from others do not know that the strength that seems to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/most-of-those-who-think-their-strength-is-gone-and-ask-for-help-from/)

[Mehmet Murat ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/)

> [I used to think I was tough, but there's a difference between bravado and courage, and I only started to show courage when I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-barnes/i-used-to-think-i-was-tough-but-there-s-a-difference-between-bravado/)

[Jimmy Barnes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-barnes/)

> [“Telling a true friend that you need something makes it unnecessary for you to ask them for that thing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/telling-a-true-friend-that-you-need-something-makes-it-unnecessary/)

[Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/)

> ["A closed mouth doesn't get fed." Oftentimes, we feel not worthy or we don't want to bother people. We forget to ask for help…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-daniels/a-closed-mouth-doesn-t-get-fed-oftentimes-we-feel-not-worthy-or-we/)

[Kevin Daniels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-daniels/)

> [In American culture at large, but especially in African American culture, it's a sign of weakness to ask for help.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/in-american-culture-at-large-but-especially-in-african-american/)

[Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/)

> [“I learned that when you ask for help it will always be given. If you try to work with spirit then they will always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-rathore/i-learned-that-when-you-ask-for-help-it-will-always-be-given-if-you/)

[Michelle Rathore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-rathore/)

> [ “- \[Regret,Cause you didn't ask for help\] is better than \[Regret,cause you did\]” ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/omar-hosny/regret-cause-you-didn-t-ask-for-help-is-better-than-regret-cause-you/)

Omar Hosny

> [I am not embarrassed to say that when I was at my worst I took anti-depressants because I think people need to hear that.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olivia-newton-john/i-am-not-embarrassed-to-say-that-when-i-was-at-my-worst-i-took-anti/)

[Olivia Newton-John](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olivia-newton-john/)

Browse all 280 Ask for help quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we don't need it. We're used to being in pain and living with it.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Morgan Parker"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-help-we-think-we-don-t-need-it/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Ask for help"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-help-we-think-we-don-t-need-it/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/morgan-parker-6193_ask-for-help_it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-hel_1546656.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“It's hard for black women to ask for help. We think we don't need it. We're used to being in pain and living…” — Morgan Parker",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Morgan Parker",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/morgan-parker/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "It's hard for black women to...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-help-we-think-we-don-t-need-it/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/morgan-parker/it-s-hard-for-black-women-to-ask-for-help-we-think-we-don-t-need-it/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
