--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: To ensure that the self doesn't shrink…" description: "\"To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered like potted flowers, and the watering calls ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg" --- # To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it… ![“To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered like potted flowers, and the watering calls for regular contact with the witnesses of the past, that is to say, with friends.” quote by Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg) > “To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered like potted flowers, and the watering calls for regular contact with the witnesses of the past, that is to say, with friends.” [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Memories need regular sharing with friends to stay vivid and prevent self‑shrinkage. **In simple terms:** Talk with friends to keep memories alive. Key Takeaway Stay connected with friends. Themes memory friendship identity loneliness Mood nostalgic thoughtful Type literary reflective When to use this quote - family gatherings - reunion events - support groups - personal reflection Key Concepts Literature psychology social connection Questions to Reflect On - How do you keep memories alive when apart? - What role do friends play in your sense of self? A Different Perspective Friends may not always be available for regular contact. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Contact](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/contact/) [Ensure Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ensure-self-4550275/) [Flower](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/flower/) [Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship/) [Gardening](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gardening/) [Memories](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memories/) [Memories Watered](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memories-watered-1231671/) [Memory](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memory/) [Past](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/past/) [Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Volume](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/volume/) [Watering Calls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/watering-calls-4550274/) [Witness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/witness/) [Witnesses Past](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/witnesses-past-4550273/) ## Related quotes > [Remembering our past, carrying it around with us always, may be the necessary requirement for maintaining, as they say, the wholeness of the self.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/remembering-our-past-carrying-it-around-with-us-always-may-be-the/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Friendship is indispensable to man for the proper function of his memory. Remembering our past, carrying it with us always, may be the necessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/friendship-is-indispensable-to-man-for-the-proper-function-of-his/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [In organic chemistry there exist certain types which are conserved even when, in place of hydrogen, equal volumes of chlorine, of bromine, etc. are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-baptiste-dumas/in-organic-chemistry-there-exist-certain-types-which-are-conserved/) [Jean-Baptiste Dumas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-baptiste-dumas/) > [Vee is my un-twin. She's green-eyed, milky blond, and a few pounds over curvy. I'm a smoky-eyed brunette with volumes of curly hair that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becca-fitzpatrick/vee-is-my-un-twin-she-s-green-eyed-milky-blond-and-a-few-pounds-over/) [Becca Fitzpatrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/becca-fitzpatrick/) > [The work with which we embark on this first volume of a series of theological studies is a work with which the philosophical person…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hans-urs-von-balthasar/the-work-with-which-we-embark-on-this-first-volume-of-a-series-of/) [Hans Urs von Balthasar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hans-urs-von-balthasar/) > [Formerly Milton's Paradise Lost had been my chief favourite, and in my excursions during the voyage of the Beagle, when I could take only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-darwin/formerly-milton-s-paradise-lost-had-been-my-chief-favourite-and-in-my/) [Charles Darwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-darwin/) > [Of all human events, perhaps, the publication of a first volume of verses is the most insignificant; but though a matter of no moment…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/herman-melville/of-all-human-events-perhaps-the-publication-of-a-first-volume-of/) [Herman Melville](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/herman-melville/) > [My books are very few, but then the world is before me - a library open to all - from which poverty of purse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-howe/my-books-are-very-few-but-then-the-world-is-before-me-a-library-open/) [Joseph Howe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-howe/) > [The Australian Book of Etiquette is a very slim volume.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-theroux/the-australian-book-of-etiquette-is-a-very-slim-volume/) [Paul Theroux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-theroux/) > [I think if you turn down the volume on the good comedy, you should not even know if it's a comedy or not. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-billingsley/i-think-if-you-turn-down-the-volume-on-the-good-comedy-you-should-not/) [Peter Billingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-billingsley/) > [They represent tomorrow's cigarette business. . . As this 14-24 age group matures, they will account for a key share of the total cigarette…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-j-reynolds/they-represent-tomorrow-s-cigarette-business-as-this-14-24-age-group/) [R. J. Reynolds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-j-reynolds/) > [We set no volume goals in our insurance business generally-and certainly not in reinsurance-as virtually any volume can be achieved if profitability standards are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/warren-buffett/we-set-no-volume-goals-in-our-insurance-business-generally-and/) [Warren Buffett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/warren-buffett/) > [A poet could write volumes about diners, because they're so beautiful. They're brightly lit, with chrome and booths and Naugahyde and great waitresses. Now,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-lynch/a-poet-could-write-volumes-about-diners-because-they-re-so-beautiful/) [David Lynch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-lynch/) > [I see no good reasons why the views given in this volume should shock the religious views of anyone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-darwin/i-see-no-good-reasons-why-the-views-given-in-this-volume-should-shock/) [Charles Darwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-darwin/) > [ There's a fantastic, thousand-page book by David Thomson about \[David O. Selznick\]. Again, it's not the best argument or the best advertisement for his… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karina-longworth/there-s-a-fantastic-thousand-page-book-by-david-thomson-about-david-o/) [Karina Longworth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karina-longworth/) ## More by Milan Kundera > [“The future is only an indifferent void no one cares about, but the past is filled with life, and its countenance is irritating, repellent,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/the-future-is-only-an-indifferent-void-no-one-cares-about-but-the/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“From that time on they both looked forward to sleeping together. I might even say that the goal of their lovemaking was not so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/from-that-time-on-they-both-looked-forward-to-sleeping-together-i/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Beauty in the European sense has always had a premeditated quality to it. We've always had an aesthetic intention and a long-range plan. That's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/beauty-in-the-european-sense-has-always-had-a-premeditated-quality-to/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [The beauty of New York is unintentional; it arose independent of human design, like a stalagmite cavern.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/the-beauty-of-new-york-is-unintentional-it-arose-independent-of-human/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [Children, Never look Back!" and this meant that we must never allow the future to be weighed down by memory . for children have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/children-never-look-back-and-this-meant-that-we-must-never-allow-the/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Our lives may be separate, but they run in the same direction, like parallel lines.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/our-lives-may-be-separate-but-they-run-in-the-same-direction-like/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Having a child is to show an absolute accord with mankind. If I have a child, it's as though I'm saying: I was born…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/having-a-child-is-to-show-an-absolute-accord-with-mankind-if-i-have-a/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [Love is a battle," said Marie-Claude, still smiling. "And I plan to go on fighting. To the end." Love is a battle?" said Franz.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/love-is-a-battle-said-marie-claude-still-smiling-and-i-plan-to-go-on/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“He remained annoyed with himself until he realized that not knowing what he wanted was actually quite natural. We can never know what to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/he-remained-annoyed-with-himself-until-he-realized-that-not-knowing/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Whenever I think about ancient cultures nostalgia seizes me. Perhaps this is nothing but envy of the sweet slowness of the history of that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/whenever-i-think-about-ancient-cultures-nostalgia-seizes-me-perhaps/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [When we ignore the body, we are more easily victimized by it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/when-we-ignore-the-body-we-are-more-easily-victimized-by-it/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Do stories, apart from happening, being, have something to say? For all my skepticism, some trace of irrational superstition did survive in me, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/do-stories-apart-from-happening-being-have-something-to-say-for-all/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“Os extremos delimitam a fronteira para além da qual a vida termina, e a paixão pelo extremismo, tanto em arte como em política, é…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/os-extremos-delimitam-a-fronteira-para-al-m-da-qual-a-vida-termina-e/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [The characters in my novels are my own unrealized possibilities. That is why I am equally fond of them all and equally horrified by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/the-characters-in-my-novels-are-my-own-unrealized-possibilities-that/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [Anyone whose goal is 'something higher' must expect someday to suffer vertigo.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/anyone-whose-goal-is-something-higher-must-expect-someday-to-suffer/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) [Explore all 952 Milan Kundera quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) ## More Contact quotes > [Politics in Philadelphia is a contact sport.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-nutter/politics-in-philadelphia-is-a-contact-sport/) [Michael Nutter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-nutter/) > [She'd read once that if you ran into a bear in the woods you should avoid eye contact and you shouldn't run away, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-ursu/she-d-read-once-that-if-you-ran-into-a-bear-in-the-woods-you-should/) [Anne Ursu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-ursu/) > [Becoming famous is a really shocking thing, especially when you don't have aspirations to it. It got to the point where I would try…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-moyet/becoming-famous-is-a-really-shocking-thing-especially-when-you-don-t/) [Alison Moyet](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-moyet/) > [Some people are like ants. Give them a warm day and a piece of ground and they start digging. There the similarity ends. Ants…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hal-borland/some-people-are-like-ants-give-them-a-warm-day-and-a-piece-of-ground/) [Hal Borland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hal-borland/) > [The Harvard Business Review recently had an article called 'The Human Moment,' about how to make real contact with a person at work: ...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-goleman/the-harvard-business-review-recently-had-an-article-called-the-human/) [Daniel Goleman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-goleman/) > [The improved American highway system isolated the American-in-transit. On his speedway he had no contact with the towns which he by-passed. If he stopped…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-j-boorstin/the-improved-american-highway-system-isolated-the-american-in-transit/) [Daniel J. Boorstin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-j-boorstin/) > [Close contact between science and the practice of collective farms and State farms creates inexhaustible opportunities for the development of theoretical knowledge, enabling us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trofim-lysenko/close-contact-between-science-and-the-practice-of-collective-farms/) [Trofim Lysenko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trofim-lysenko/) > [You should never feel lonely, neglected, fearful, or defeated when you remember that there are the shining ones. They are watching with keen interest…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/flower-a-newhouse/you-should-never-feel-lonely-neglected-fearful-or-defeated-when-you/) [Flower A. Newhouse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/flower-a-newhouse/) > [Daily contact with some teachers is itself all-sided ethical education for the child without a spoken precept. Here, too, the real advantage of male…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/g-stanley-hall/daily-contact-with-some-teachers-is-itself-all-sided-ethical/) [G. Stanley Hall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/g-stanley-hall/) > [Emma was a shocking driver, simultaneously sloppy and petrified, and for the first fifty miles had been absent-mindedly driving with her spectacles on top…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/emma-was-a-shocking-driver-simultaneously-sloppy-and-petrified-and/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [Is there some lesson on how to be friends? I think what it means is that central to living a life that is good…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-rakoff/is-there-some-lesson-on-how-to-be-friends-i-think-what-it-means-is/) [David Rakoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-rakoff/) > [The Filipino embraces civilization and lives and thrives in every clime, in contact with every people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jos-rizal/the-filipino-embraces-civilization-and-lives-and-thrives-in-every/) [Jose Rizal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jos-rizal/) > [I don't know whether we think in moving images or whether we think in still images. I have a suspicion that on our hard…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-snow/i-don-t-know-whether-we-think-in-moving-images-or-whether-we-think-in/) [Jon Snow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-snow/) > [One of the best ways into the business is to get a job with a production, which you can do by cold-calling or by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitchell-hurwitz/one-of-the-best-ways-into-the-business-is-to-get-a-job-with-a/) [Mitchell Hurwitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitchell-hurwitz/) > [“I never met a pig I didn't like. All pigs are intelligent, emotional, and sensitive souls. They all love company. They all crave contact…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sy-montgomery/i-never-met-a-pig-i-didn-t-like-all-pigs-are-intelligent-emotional/) [Sy Montgomery](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sy-montgomery/) [Browse all 1,740 Contact quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/contact/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered like potted flowers, and the watering calls for regular contact with the witnesses of the past, that is to say, with friends.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Milan Kundera" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-to-see-that-it-holds-on-to-its/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Contact" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-to-see-that-it-holds-on-to-its/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0f/milan-kundera-120_contact_to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-t_545127.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“To ensure that the self doesn't shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered…” — Milan Kundera", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Milan Kundera", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "To ensure that the self doesn't...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-to-see-that-it-holds-on-to-its/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/to-ensure-that-the-self-doesn-t-shrink-to-see-that-it-holds-on-to-its/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```