--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Discipline is not always internalized and…" description: "\"Discipline is not always internalized and actually can breed resentment among children.\" — Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg" --- # Discipline is not always internalized and actually can… ![“Discipline is not always internalized and actually can breed resentment among children.” quote by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg) > “Discipline is not always internalized and actually can breed resentment among children.” [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. External discipline may cause resentment in children, suggesting intrinsic motivation is more sustainable. **In simple terms:** External rules can breed resentment. Key Takeaway Foster internal drive over imposed control. Themes parenting motivation psychology Mood thoughtful cautionary Type psychological educational When to use this quote - education - family dynamics - personal growth Key Concepts autonomy intrinsic motivation behavioral psychology Questions to Reflect On - How can parents balance guidance with autonomy? - What activities nurture intrinsic motivation? A Different Perspective Strict discipline can damage relationships. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Anger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) [Breed Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/breed-resentment-499430/) [Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Discipline](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discipline/) [Discipline Internalized](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discipline-internalized-499429/) [Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment/) [Resentment Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment-children-499428/) ## Related quotes > [“No one is born with prejudicial feelings, they are developed and nurtured within us by our experiences and upbringing. Consider the many factors involved:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dudley-c-rutherford/no-one-is-born-with-prejudicial-feelings-they-are-developed-and/) [Dudley C. Rutherford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dudley-c-rutherford/) > [The resentment I felt inside was not hatred for being imprisoned or for Victor who had betrayed me but something deeper: a rebellion against…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/macdonald-harris/the-resentment-i-felt-inside-was-not-hatred-for-being-imprisoned-or/) [MacDonald Harris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/macdonald-harris/) > [When we have painful memories from hurting experiences, we may feel justified in holding on to the resentment. But resentment is corrosive. It doesn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-l-taylor/when-we-have-painful-memories-from-hurting-experiences-we-may-feel/) [Susan L. Taylor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-l-taylor/) > [“Implacable resentment is a shade in a character. But you have chosen your fault well. I really cannot laugh at it. You are safe from me." "There is,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/implacable-resentment-is-a-shade-in-a-character-but-you-have-chosen/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [Resentment is, in every stage of the passion, painful, but it is not disagreeable, unless in excess; pity is always painful, yet always agreeable;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alec-douglas-home/resentment-is-in-every-stage-of-the-passion-painful-but-it-is-not/) [Alec Douglas-Home](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alec-douglas-home/) > [Resentment is at work when one so hates somebody for his more favorable circumstances that one is prepared to bear heavy losses if only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ludwig-von-mises/resentment-is-at-work-when-one-so-hates-somebody-for-his-more/) [Ludwig von Mises](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ludwig-von-mises/) > [Never allow sick attitudes to poison your thinking, nor let ill will make you ill. Avoid making your mind sore by that painful rehurting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/norman-vincent-peale/never-allow-sick-attitudes-to-poison-your-thinking-nor-let-ill-will/) [Norman Vincent Peale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/norman-vincent-peale/) > [“Though she would never quite articulate it this way, resentment began to sheathe concern. ANGER IS FEAR'S BODYGUARD, a poster in the hospital hard…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/celeste-ng/though-she-would-never-quite-articulate-it-this-way-resentment-began/) [Celeste Ng](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/celeste-ng/) > [Obsessive people will obsess, the thing about resentment is you can only control your own.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/obsessive-people-will-obsess-the-thing-about-resentment-is-you-can/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Holding on to resentment is like taking poison and waiting for your enemies to die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jen-sincero/holding-on-to-resentment-is-like-taking-poison-and-waiting-for-your/) [Jen Sincero](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jen-sincero/) > [“In my family, we don’t so much air our grievances as wallow in them. Anger and resentment are cumulative.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-tropper/in-my-family-we-don-t-so-much-air-our-grievances-as-wallow-in-them/) [Jonathan Tropper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-tropper/) > [Gratitude is the antidote to bitterness and resentment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-j-ryan/gratitude-is-the-antidote-to-bitterness-and-resentment/) [M. J. Ryan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-j-ryan/) > [“Relationships automatically develop resentment when selfish and petty concerns become more important than the emotional connection between you. If”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-stosny/relationships-automatically-develop-resentment-when-selfish-and-petty/) [Steven Stosny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-stosny/) > [Youre too beautiful to hold on to any resentment, bitterness & anger. Forgive yourself & Let it go!!! Be strong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ricardo-housham/youre-too-beautiful-to-hold-on-to-any-resentment-bitterness-anger/) [Ricardo Housham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ricardo-housham/) > [The vision of the left, full of envy and resentment, takes its worst toll on those at the bottom - whether black or white…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-sowell/the-vision-of-the-left-full-of-envy-and-resentment-takes-its-worst/) [Thomas Sowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-sowell/) ## More by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi > [“Entropy is the normal state of consciousness—a condition that is neither useful nor enjoyable. To avoid this condition, people are naturally eager to fill…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/entropy-is-the-normal-state-of-consciousness-a-condition-that-is/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [Most enjoyable activities are not natural; they demand an effort that initially one is reluctant to make. But once the interaction starts to provide…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/most-enjoyable-activities-are-not-natural-they-demand-an-effort-that/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [People without an internalized symbolic system can all too easily become captives of the media.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/people-without-an-internalized-symbolic-system-can-all-too-easily/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [Through learning we grow, becoming more than we were before, and in that sense learning is unselfish, because it results in the transformation of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/through-learning-we-grow-becoming-more-than-we-were-before-and-in/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [“Unfortunately, many people find the only challenges they can respond to are violence, gambling, random sex, or drugs. Some of these experiences can be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/unfortunately-many-people-find-the-only-challenges-they-can-respond/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [It is essential to learn to enjoy life. It really does not make sense to go through the motions of existence if one does…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/it-is-essential-to-learn-to-enjoy-life-it-really-does-not-make-sense/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [“It is usual to explain the motivation of those who enjoy dangerous activities as some sort of pathological need: they are trying to exorcise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/it-is-usual-to-explain-the-motivation-of-those-who-enjoy-dangerous/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [“Wisdom and integrity cannot be found in any single domain. A broader viewpoint that breaks across disciplinary boundaries is needed, a way of understanding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/wisdom-and-integrity-cannot-be-found-in-any-single-domain-a-broader/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [For better or worse, our future will be determined in large part by our dreams and by the struggle to make them real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/for-better-or-worse-our-future-will-be-determined-in-large-part-by/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [Many business leaders today view their jobs as entailing responsibility for the welfare of the wider community. These individuals do not define themselves as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/many-business-leaders-today-view-their-jobs-as-entailing/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [The rules themselves are clear enough, and within everyone’s reach. But many forces, both within ourselves and in the environment, stand in the way.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/the-rules-themselves-are-clear-enough-and-within-everyone-s-reach-but/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [When each of these three elements of vision-concern for excellence, for people and for the wider environment-are present, business is transformed from a tool…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/when-each-of-these-three-elements-of-vision-concern-for-excellence/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [If an enterprise does not aspire to be the best of its kind, it will attract second-rate employees, and it will be soon forgotten.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/if-an-enterprise-does-not-aspire-to-be-the-best-of-its-kind-it-will/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [Only direct control of experience, the ability to derive moment-by-moment enjoyment from everything we do, can overcome the obstacles to fulfillment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/only-direct-control-of-experience-the-ability-to-derive-moment-by/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) > [Try to be surprised by something every day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/try-to-be-surprised-by-something-every-day/) [Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) [Explore all 262 Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/) ## More Anger quotes > [“If I let myself think of it the pain and anger were still fresh, adrenalin racing down my limbs to pool, hot and itchy,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kylie-ladd/if-i-let-myself-think-of-it-the-pain-and-anger-were-still-fresh/) [Kylie Ladd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kylie-ladd/) > [I receive something we might euphemistically call an 'inappropriately hostile' response - that is to say, more than fair criticism or even fair anger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-beard/i-receive-something-we-might-euphemistically-call-an-inappropriately/) [Mary Beard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-beard/) > [The vision of the left, full of envy and resentment, takes its worst toll on those at the bottom - whether black or white…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-sowell/the-vision-of-the-left-full-of-envy-and-resentment-takes-its-worst/) [Thomas Sowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-sowell/) > [Anger is a rough water; if you can canalize it into a water mill, you can benefit from it. Anything bad can be transformed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/anger-is-a-rough-water-if-you-can-canalize-it-into-a-water-mill-you/) [Mehmet Murat Ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/) > [“Some say the Earth is angry Because he wants no company; I say the Earth is angry Because he lives alone.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/some-say-the-earth-is-angry-because-he-wants-no-company-i-say-the/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“When you feel terribly angry, you're possessed by anger ghost.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/toba-beta/when-you-feel-terribly-angry-you-re-possessed-by-anger-ghost/) [Toba Beta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/toba-beta/) > [“Medical studies have shown that cursing reduces levels of stress and pain. Repressing your anger is not healthy. It's much better to verbalize it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oliver-markus-malloy/medical-studies-have-shown-that-cursing-reduces-levels-of-stress-and/) [Oliver Markus Malloy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oliver-markus-malloy/) > [My care will be in the heart n not in words My anger will be in Words n not in the Heart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/my-care-will-be-in-the-heart-n-not-in-words-my-anger-will-be-in-words/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [You should be angry. You must not be bitter. Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. It doesn't do anything to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/you-should-be-angry-you-must-not-be-bitter-bitterness-is-like-cancer/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/to-be-a-negro-in-this-country-and-to-be-relatively-conscious-is-to-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/god-you-had-enough-time-to-have-been-through-it-three-times-you-ve/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [The present contains nothing more than the past, and what is found in the effect was already in the cause.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henri-bergson/the-present-contains-nothing-more-than-the-past-and-what-is-found-in/) [Henri Bergson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henri-bergson/) > [Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-wright/depression-is-merely-anger-without-enthusiasm/) [Steven Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-wright/) > [I always fight better when my opponent's angry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-haye/i-always-fight-better-when-my-opponent-s-angry/) [David Haye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-haye/) > [ “Where there are kashays (anger-pride-deceit-greed), there is worldly life. As long as anger-pride-deceit-greed exist; one is a sansaari \[living a worldly life\] regardless of… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dada-bhagwan/where-there-are-kashays-anger-pride-deceit-greed-there-is-worldly/) [Dada Bhagwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dada-bhagwan/) [Browse all 7,469 Anger quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Discipline is not always internalized and actually can breed resentment among children.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/discipline-is-not-always-internalized-and-actually-can-breed/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Anger" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/discipline-is-not-always-internalized-and-actually-can-breed/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a1/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi-1255_anger_discipline-is-not-always-internalized-an_824132.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Discipline is not always internalized and actually can breed resentment among children.” — Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Discipline is not always internalized and...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/discipline-is-not-always-internalized-and-actually-can-breed/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/discipline-is-not-always-internalized-and-actually-can-breed/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```