--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We aren't defined by our work. People…" description: "\"We aren't defined by our work. People think if you over-identify with your work, then that must mean you're giving over too much of yourself to it, tha..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b65/melissa-gira-grant-15196_balance_we-aren-t-defined-by-our-work-people-thi_2838163.jpg" --- # We aren't defined by our work. People think if you… ![“We aren't defined by our work. People think if you over-identify with your work, then that must mean you're giving over too much of yourself to it, that there's something wrong with that. We're trained to believe in things like work-life balance. So much work is tending towards service. It's very…” quote by Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b65/melissa-gira-grant-15196_balance_we-aren-t-defined-by-our-work-people-thi_2838163.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b65/melissa-gira-grant-15196_balance_we-aren-t-defined-by-our-work-people-thi_2838163.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b65/melissa-gira-grant-15196_balance_we-aren-t-defined-by-our-work-people-thi_2838163.jpg) > “We aren't defined by our work. People think if you over-identify with your work, then that must mean you're giving over too much of yourself to it, that there's something wrong with that. We're trained to believe in things like work-life balance. So much work is tending towards service. It's very much about creating experiences rather than products, and it makes those boundaries between life and work very slippery.” [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The quote argues that personal identity should not be conflated with professional roles, urging a view of work as service and experience creation rather than a defining self. **In simple terms:** Work shouldn't define you; see it as service and experience. Key Takeaway Separate identity from job; focus on service and experiences. Themes identity work‑life balance service experience creation Mood thoughtful balanced inspirational Type philosophical advisory reflective When to use this quote - career decisions - personal development - boundary setting - service orientation - experience design Key Concepts self‑concept role theory boundary fluidity meaningful work Questions to Reflect On - How can you maintain personal identity separate from work? - What boundaries help you keep work and life distinct? A Different Perspective Over‑identifying with work can still happen despite awareness. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Balance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/balance/) [Balance Work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/balance-work/) [Believe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/believe/) [Boundaries](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boundaries/) [Defined Work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/defined-work-1673842/) [Giving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/giving/) [Life balance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-balance/) [Mean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mean/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) [Work Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work-life/) [Work Mean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work-mean-1800079/) [Work People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work-people/) [Work-Life Balance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work-life-balance-2/) ## Related quotes > [So there's no such thing as work-life balance. There's work, and there's life, and there's no balance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheryl-sandberg/so-there-s-no-such-thing-as-work-life-balance-there-s-work-and-there/) [Sheryl Sandberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheryl-sandberg/) > [There is no such thing as work-life balance. There is work, there is life, and there is no balance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheryl-sandberg/there-is-no-such-thing-as-work-life-balance-there-is-work-there-is/) [Sheryl Sandberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheryl-sandberg/) > [There's no such thing as work-life balance. There are work-life choices, and you make them, and they have consequences.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-welch/there-s-no-such-thing-as-work-life-balance-there-are-work-life/) [Jack Welch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-welch/) > [It is not about finding a work-life balance, but, rather, it's about work-life integration. I've learned to integrate my work and life so that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/denise-morrison/it-is-not-about-finding-a-work-life-balance-but-rather-it-s-about/) [Denise Morrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/denise-morrison/) > [I walk out of this office every day at 5:30 so I'm home for dinner with my kids at 6, and interestingly, I've been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheryl-sandberg/i-walk-out-of-this-office-every-day-at-5-30-so-i-m-home-for-dinner/) [Sheryl Sandberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheryl-sandberg/) > [Wrestling with work-life balance is a luxury when working to support a family is a necessity rather than a choice. I think that focus…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/willow-bay/wrestling-with-work-life-balance-is-a-luxury-when-working-to-support/) [Willow Bay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/willow-bay/) > [The phrase "work-life balance" tells us that people think that work is the opposite of life. We should be talking about life-life balance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patrick-dixon/the-phrase-work-life-balance-tells-us-that-people-think-that-work-is/) [Patrick Dixon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patrick-dixon/) > [Startups are not the best choice for work-life balance, and that's sort of just the sad reality.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sam-altman/startups-are-not-the-best-choice-for-work-life-balance-and-that-s/) [Sam Altman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sam-altman/) > [I don't get a work-life balance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-conte/i-don-t-get-a-work-life-balance/) [Jack Conte](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-conte/) > [Work-life balance is not just a buzzy, self-help term that real business people laugh at. You need it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-ruhle/work-life-balance-is-not-just-a-buzzy-self-help-term-that-real/) [Stephanie Ruhle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-ruhle/) > [“Work-life balance is not something we can find. That’s because we use words as if this balance were a noun when in reality it’s…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tina-hallis/work-life-balance-is-not-something-we-can-find-that-s-because-we-use/) [Tina Hallis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tina-hallis/) > [“The concept of “work-life balance” is a fleeting idea for a Bombshell. Instead, a focus on work-life success—where her time and energy shifts based…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amber-hurdle/the-concept-of-work-life-balance-is-a-fleeting-idea-for-a-bombshell/) [Amber Hurdle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amber-hurdle/) > [To have someone who never makes a mistake, never finds her personal life in disarray, never worries about work-life balance? I think that would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophie-kinsella/to-have-someone-who-never-makes-a-mistake-never-finds-her-personal/) [Sophie Kinsella](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophie-kinsella/) > [“There is no work-life balance. We have one life. What's most important is that you be awake for it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janice-marturano/there-is-no-work-life-balance-we-have-one-life-what-s-most-important/) [Janice Marturano](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janice-marturano/) > [I think all of us are multitasking a little more today than we used to or than we would like to. And I think…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irene-rosenfeld/i-think-all-of-us-are-multitasking-a-little-more-today-than-we-used/) [Irene Rosenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irene-rosenfeld/) ## More by Melissa Gira Grant > [I went to college in Amherst and lived in Northampton for many years and we had our quaint little feminist sex toy shop that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/i-went-to-college-in-amherst-and-lived-in-northampton-for-many-years/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [We hear from sex workers who have through their own volition become media figures, or have despite their own wishes become media figures. Like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/we-hear-from-sex-workers-who-have-through-their-own-volition-become/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [One person was basically saying that feminists aren't interested in criminalizing prostitutes, that they don't want to do that. I responded that whether or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/one-person-was-basically-saying-that-feminists-aren-t-interested-in/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [Our feelings alone don't change what happens with the police, what happens in jail, what happens when someone tries to go to the welfare…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/our-feelings-alone-don-t-change-what-happens-with-the-police-what/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [It's actually not much of a risk to say, "I don't think we should put sex workers in jail." That's a decent, normal thing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/it-s-actually-not-much-of-a-risk-to-say-i-don-t-think-we-should-put/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [In the current situation with criminalization, we've created situations where sex workers have very little power and control over their lives. Increasing one group…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/in-the-current-situation-with-criminalization-we-ve-created/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [Almost everything I've learned about journalism has been from other friends who are journalists, taking advantage of the money I hope they don't think…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/almost-everything-i-ve-learned-about-journalism-has-been-from-other/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [I remember being in high school in the '90s, and even then somehow hearing about the the Canadian Supreme Court's Butler decision which was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/i-remember-being-in-high-school-in-the-90s-and-even-then-somehow/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [Kristin Gwynne has been writing some great stuff about the sexually violent element of "stop-and-frisk." This isn't just "turn out your pockets." This is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/kristin-gwynne-has-been-writing-some-great-stuff-about-the-sexually/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [In New Zealand, sex workers are regarded as workers, as people who are members of the community, people who have a stake in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/in-new-zealand-sex-workers-are-regarded-as-workers-as-people-who-are/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [Even at legal brothels, sex workers have very little power and control over their workplace. They might have power with their customers on a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/even-at-legal-brothels-sex-workers-have-very-little-power-and-control/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [I've moved away from writing about and describing actual experiences of sex work, whether mine or anybody else's, because the culture is obsessed with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/i-ve-moved-away-from-writing-about-and-describing-actual-experiences/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [I have to do this all the time - choosing what to print based on how it might come back to harm people from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/i-have-to-do-this-all-the-time-choosing-what-to-print-based-on-how-it/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [When I interviewed the evangelical Christian youth group who were protesting the Village Voice, I wanted them to feel they could freely tell me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/when-i-interviewed-the-evangelical-christian-youth-group-who-were/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) > [Say you're a sex worker and your partner knows you're a sex worker, but you're not out to your family. That could be very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-gira-grant/say-you-re-a-sex-worker-and-your-partner-knows-you-re-a-sex-worker/) [Melissa Gira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) [Explore all 44 Melissa Gira Grant quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-gira-grant/) ## More Balance quotes > [Balance suggests a perfect equilibrium. There is no such thing. That is a false expectation… There are going to be priorities and dimensions of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/denise-morrison/balance-suggests-a-perfect-equilibrium-there-is-no-such-thing-that-is/) [Denise Morrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/denise-morrison/) > [The bones of my architecture are very much related to the structure, to the physical fact of how a building can stand up; it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/santiago-calatrava/the-bones-of-my-architecture-are-very-much-related-to-the-structure/) [Santiago Calatrava](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/santiago-calatrava/) > [I can still function when I don't have that balance I crave. I had a tendency to be precious about acting, thinking of it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-regan/i-can-still-function-when-i-don-t-have-that-balance-i-crave-i-had-a/) [Laura Regan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-regan/) > [she got a reputation for an easy smile and a sharp tongue, and using one to balance the other, she seemed friendly but distant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-allison/she-got-a-reputation-for-an-easy-smile-and-a-sharp-tongue-and-using/) [Dorothy Allison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-allison/) > [Life's unfairness is not irrevocable; we can help balance the scales for others, if not always for ourselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hubert-h-humphrey/life-s-unfairness-is-not-irrevocable-we-can-help-balance-the-scales/) [Hubert H. Humphrey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hubert-h-humphrey/) > [“We don't need to strive towards balance, we rather need to work on the obstacles that are preventing the natural flow of balance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-a-alebraheem/we-don-t-need-to-strive-towards-balance-we-rather-need-to-work-on-the/) [A.A. Alebraheem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-a-alebraheem/) > [I think that kind of balance comes with the process of growing together as a band, the Little Dragon. We love to write, we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yukimi-nagano/i-think-that-kind-of-balance-comes-with-the-process-of-growing/) [Yukimi Nagano](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yukimi-nagano/) > [Balance is the ability to be happy in the midst of the most chaotic or even boring or transient circumstance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-lenz/balance-is-the-ability-to-be-happy-in-the-midst-of-the-most-chaotic/) [Frederick Lenz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-lenz/) > [At times of recession, running a budget deficit is highly desirable. Once the economy begins to recover, you have to balance the budget. But…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-soros/at-times-of-recession-running-a-budget-deficit-is-highly-desirable/) [George Soros](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-soros/) > [It's my intention to make something stand outside the realm of album art, but it also feels comfortable to me to be in it.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-dyer-baizley/it-s-my-intention-to-make-something-stand-outside-the-realm-of-album/) [John Dyer Baizley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-dyer-baizley/) > [Once you've gotten your money in balance, you know how much you have to spend on things that are just fun.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-warren/once-you-ve-gotten-your-money-in-balance-you-know-how-much-you-have/) [Elizabeth Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-warren/) > [I never understood how much running changes your life. I'm now obsessed. When not trying to beat my personal best, I'm talking to other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sadiq-khan/i-never-understood-how-much-running-changes-your-life-i-m-now/) [Sadiq Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sadiq-khan/) > [Whatever needed to be done, I need to know how to do it just as well as my wife. You know, for us to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jason-isbell/whatever-needed-to-be-done-i-need-to-know-how-to-do-it-just-as-well/) [Jason Isbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jason-isbell/) > [I don't think my parents would have let me go straight into acting full time when I was 12. I do like to have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/felicity-jones/i-don-t-think-my-parents-would-have-let-me-go-straight-into-acting/) [Felicity Jones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/felicity-jones/) > [When it comes down to music, I have no balance. I am 100 percent. It is like full throttle. Five hundred miles an hour.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yanni/when-it-comes-down-to-music-i-have-no-balance-i-am-100-percent-it-is/) [Yanni](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yanni/) [Browse all 5,166 Balance quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/balance/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We aren't defined by our work. People think if you over-identify with your work, then that must mean you're giving over too much of yourself to it, that there's something wrong with that. We're trained to believe in things like work-life balance. So much work is tending towards service. 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