--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It came as a surprise to us, as I suspect…" description: "\"“It came as a surprise to us, as I suspect it does to many, that marriage changed us. We’d felt as though we’d always had those rings, wrapped about ou..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/711/megan-rich-30318_communication_it-came-as-a-surprise-to-us-as-i-suspect_787616.jpg" --- # It came as a surprise to us, as I suspect it does to many… ![“It came as a surprise to us, as I suspect it does to many, that marriage changed us. We’d felt as though we’d always had those rings, wrapped about our fingers, like the scraggly garlands of those first, revelatory conversations. But those real rings, wooden as they were, began to set their roots…” quote by Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/711/megan-rich-30318_communication_it-came-as-a-surprise-to-us-as-i-suspect_787616.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/711/megan-rich-30318_communication_it-came-as-a-surprise-to-us-as-i-suspect_787616.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/711/megan-rich-30318_communication_it-came-as-a-surprise-to-us-as-i-suspect_787616.jpg) > ““It came as a surprise to us, as I suspect it does to many, that marriage changed us. We’d felt as though we’d always had those rings, wrapped about our fingers, like the scraggly garlands of those first, revelatory conversations. But those real rings, wooden as they were, began to set their roots, and that settling, the calming feeling of having been planted into the same plot to flourish, was a relief from that once-nagging question of loneliness. No matter what happened now, even if we’d found ourselves lonelier than we’d ever been, we’d know that that plot of land was our own to cultivate. Each moment was now a dual-moment, each of our lives a dual-life. The open road, that atlas, the open-faced moon and that wine were the first conscious recognitions of our floating life. One that perhaps we’d have created on our own, but now no longer had to.”” [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Marriage transforms partnership into a shared, rooted life, offering relief from loneliness despite future uncertainties. **In simple terms:** Marriage makes a shared life feel rooted and less lonely. Key Takeaway Cultivate shared growth in relationships. Themes marriage connection growth Mood introspective hopeful Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - long‑term partnership - navigating loneliness - building a shared future - celebrating companionship Key Concepts commitment rootedness dual identity Questions to Reflect On - How does shared growth change personal identity? - What challenges arise when roots feel too deep? A Different Perspective The metaphor of rings may not resonate with all cultural views on marriage. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Communication](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/communication/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Open road](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/open-road/) ## Related quotes > [Even as a child she had lived her own small life within herself. At a very early period she had apprehended instinctively the dual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-chopin/even-as-a-child-she-had-lived-her-own-small-life-within-herself-at-a/) [Kate Chopin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-chopin/) > [“Edna lived a dual life - that outward existence which conforms, the inward life which questions”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-chopin/edna-lived-a-dual-life-that-outward-existence-which-conforms-the/) [Kate Chopin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-chopin/) > [“At a very early period she had apprehended the instinctively the dual life - that outward existence which conforms, the inward life which questions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kate-chopin/at-a-very-early-period-she-had-apprehended-the-instinctively-the-dual/) [Kate Chopin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kate-chopin/) > [I lived a dual life, and when my dual life exploded, I began to feel much happier.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-nesbitt/i-lived-a-dual-life-and-when-my-dual-life-exploded-i-began-to-feel/) [James Nesbitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-nesbitt/) > [Literature - novels, plays, and poems - can have an uncanny dual life, where they simultaneously represent something eternal and something historical, and this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-smiley/literature-novels-plays-and-poems-can-have-an-uncanny-dual-life-where/) [Jane Smiley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-smiley/) > [You are asking, 'Is the concept of soul mates more useful than marriage?' Concepts don't matter. What matters is your understanding. You can change…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rajneesh/you-are-asking-is-the-concept-of-soul-mates-more-useful-than-marriage/) [Rajneesh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rajneesh/) > [Yeah, I think that social conservatives recognize that they didn't just lose the debate about same-sex marriage. They lost the debate about the institution…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ross-douthat/yeah-i-think-that-social-conservatives-recognize-that-they-didn-t/) [Ross Douthat](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ross-douthat/) > [“A lot of wives are trying too hard to make their marriages work, but they can’t sustain the weight of what they’re doing, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tony-evans/a-lot-of-wives-are-trying-too-hard-to-make-their-marriages-work-but/) [Tony Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tony-evans/) > [People often ask whether marriage has changed me. I didn't marry because I had to change.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fahadh-faasil/people-often-ask-whether-marriage-has-changed-me-i-didn-t-marry/) [Fahadh Faasil](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fahadh-faasil/) > [Marriage has changed Himmanshoo in some ways. Throughout our 10 years of courtship, he was more liberal. But after marriage, he has become a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amruta-khanvilkar/marriage-has-changed-himmanshoo-in-some-ways-throughout-our-10-years/) [Amruta Khanvilkar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amruta-khanvilkar/) > [“I used to be a dreamer, but marriage changed all that.” D’Artagnan Bloodhawke”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/d-artagnan-bloodhawke/i-used-to-be-a-dreamer-but-marriage-changed-all-that-d-artagnan/) D'Artagnan Bloodhawke > [Thinking of possibilities is like driving a car on a freeway. You have an open road that stretches endlessly before you where your thoughts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pankaj-patel/thinking-of-possibilities-is-like-driving-a-car-on-a-freeway-you-have/) [Pankaj Patel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pankaj-patel/) > [“The untented Kosmos my abode, I pass, a wilful stranger: My mistress still the open road And the bright eyes of danger.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-l-s/the-untented-kosmos-my-abode-i-pass-a-wilful-stranger-my-mistress/) R.l.s > [“From this point forward, you don’t even know how to quit in life.” ~ Aaron Lauritsen, ‘100 Days Drive”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aaron-lauritsen/from-this-point-forward-you-don-t-even-know-how-to-quit-in-life-aaron/) [Aaron Lauritsen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aaron-lauritsen/) > [Business is always a struggle. There are always obstacles and competitors. There is never an open road, except the wide road that leads to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-kirubi/business-is-always-a-struggle-there-are-always-obstacles-and/) Chris Kirubi ## More by Megan Rich > [“Patrick would flip The Beatles on mornings after a fight, when we’d bake bread, kneading our troubles into something we could eat. We’d take…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/patrick-would-flip-the-beatles-on-mornings-after-a-fight-when-we-d/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“The deeper I went into the valley, the greater the rewards. First, it was a clump of birches, the bottoms wrapped in thick fog,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/the-deeper-i-went-into-the-valley-the-greater-the-rewards-first-it/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“The afternoon sunk into the tall grass growing on the roadside. The distant dome turned from coral to burnt umber, a final flash of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/the-afternoon-sunk-into-the-tall-grass-growing-on-the-roadside-the/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“I once had a drinking contest with an artist on his yacht... It amused him as I took shot after shot, and I realized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/i-once-had-a-drinking-contest-with-an-artist-on-his-yacht-it-amused/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“Artists have a habit of becoming what they practice on the canvas. Who knows when it began? When he discovered that the sky, filtered…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/artists-have-a-habit-of-becoming-what-they-practice-on-the-canvas-who/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“We arrived in Ulm just after the honeymoon, the moving there only prolonging it. 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Having learned quickly what they wanted to hear,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/they-then-interviewed-us-asking-about-our-love-of-qingdao-how-we-met/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“Besides all of this, Patrick and I living together for the first time meant it was the beginning of a life together, that nitty-gritty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/besides-all-of-this-patrick-and-i-living-together-for-the-first-time/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“In his lifetime, that small fishing village had turned into the seventh largest port in the world, an eight-million-strong city; women had gotten the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/in-his-lifetime-that-small-fishing-village-had-turned-into-the/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“After scouring the local newspaper with Oliver, a worried colleague, Patrick noticed an ad for a one-bedroom in Maehringen, a small village outside town.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/after-scouring-the-local-newspaper-with-oliver-a-worried-colleague/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“A funny thing about living abroad is that what might separate us expats back home brought us closer together in China. We'd listen to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/a-funny-thing-about-living-abroad-is-that-what-might-separate-us/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) > [“The faces of the people were wrinkled with change. Sudden change to which the skin can't possibly conform, faster than the aging of man,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/megan-rich/the-faces-of-the-people-were-wrinkled-with-change-sudden-change-to/) [Megan Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) [Explore all 17 Megan Rich quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/megan-rich/) ## More Communication quotes > [Some people still believe you should just fall in line with what's going on - and that's scary. 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The bad poet harangues at the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-r-delany/a-poet-is-wounded-into-speech-and-he-examines-these-wounds/) [Samuel R. Delany](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-r-delany/) > [“To engage in dialogue is to serve others via whatever is real inside you; to engage in debate is to ultimately serve the illusions…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oli-anderson/to-engage-in-dialogue-is-to-serve-others-via-whatever-is-real-inside/) [Oli Anderson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oli-anderson/) > [What it comes down to for me is this: Will the technologies of communication in our culture, serve to enlighten us and help us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roger-waters/what-it-comes-down-to-for-me-is-this-will-the-technologies-of/) [Roger Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roger-waters/) > [In dialogue, there is opposition, yes, but no head-on collision. Smashing heads does not open minds.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deborah-tannen/in-dialogue-there-is-opposition-yes-but-no-head-on-collision-smashing/) [Deborah Tannen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deborah-tannen/) > [A dialogue is very important. It is a form of communication in which question and answer continue till a question is left without an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jiddu-krishnamurti/a-dialogue-is-very-important-it-is-a-form-of-communication-in-which/) [Jiddu Krishnamurti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jiddu-krishnamurti/) > [I get afraid of the dark if I'm in a great deal of dark, and I have to move around inside of that fear...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emil-ferris/i-get-afraid-of-the-dark-if-i-m-in-a-great-deal-of-dark-and-i-have-to/) [Emil Ferris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emil-ferris/) > [I've been in a serious conversation with one of my children, and a fan has come up. 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But those real rings, wooden as they were, began to set their roots, and that settling, the calming feeling of having been planted into the same plot to flourish, was a relief from that once-nagging question of loneliness. No matter what happened now, even if we’d found ourselves lonelier than we’d ever been, we’d know that that plot of land was our own to cultivate. Each moment was now a dual-moment, each of our lives a dual-life. The open road, that atlas, the open-faced moon and that wine were the first conscious recognitions of our floating life. 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