---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: In short, we live with an overriding…"
description: "\"“In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have ultimate control over who our kids become when they are adults. We therefore believe that ever..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg"
---

#  In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have…

![“In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have ultimate control over who our kids become when they are adults. We therefore believe that every decision we make can potentially alter the outcome of their lives. And this is an enormous burden to carry. I want to be clear here. Parents are…” quote by Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg)

> ““In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have ultimate control over who our kids become when they are adults. We therefore believe that every decision we make can potentially alter the outcome of their lives. And this is an enormous burden to carry. I want to be clear here. Parents are the primary influence in a child’s life concerning character development, but the truth is, even our influence is very limited.””

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Parents often feel they can shape their children’s futures, but real influence is limited and the responsibility can feel overwhelming.

**In simple terms:** Parents think they control kids' futures, but influence is limited.

Key Takeaway

Recognize limits, focus on love and guidance.

Themes

parenting responsibility influence

Mood

reflective empathetic

Type

advice philosophical

When to use this quote

- family decisions
- education
- career guidance
- emotional support

Key Concepts

child development agency burden

Questions to Reflect On

- How can parents balance guidance with respecting autonomy?
- What expectations are realistic for parental influence?

A Different Perspective

Children are shaped by many factors beyond parental control.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Character development](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/character-development/) [Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child/) [Child Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child-life/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Control Kids](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/control-kids-557014/) [Influence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/influence/) [Influence Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/influence-child-278122/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents/)

## Related quotes

> [Some children naturally have more cognitive control than others, and in all kids this essential skill is being compromised by the usual suspects: smartphones,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-goleman/some-children-naturally-have-more-cognitive-control-than-others-and/)

[Daniel Goleman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-goleman/)

> [“They're just friends." This time it came out a little sharper. If I squeezed the mayo any harder, it was likely to explode. "She's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jus-accardo/they-re-just-friends-this-time-it-came-out-a-little-sharper-if-i/)

[Jus Accardo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jus-accardo/)

> [Educators are still spending way too much time trying to control what kids learn, bending the content to their own purposes, hoping beyond hope…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-greenberg/educators-are-still-spending-way-too-much-time-trying-to-control-what/)

[Daniel Greenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-greenberg/)

> [Well, my mom taught public school music for almost 40 years. And she's about 5 feet - and very mighty. And she would control…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/well-my-mom-taught-public-school-music-for-almost-40-years-and-she-s/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Personally, I'd be really glad to have a national conversation about whether to outlaw most forms of birth control. For once, the kids and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gail-collins/personally-i-d-be-really-glad-to-have-a-national-conversation-about/)

[Gail Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gail-collins/)

> [No matter how much control kids get over the media they watch, they are still utterly powerless when it comes to the manufacturing of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-rushkoff/no-matter-how-much-control-kids-get-over-the-media-they-watch-they/)

[Douglas Rushkoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-rushkoff/)

> [Everyone always says that having kids is messy and sloppy. It's true, but you as a parent have to try to bring some boundaries…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victoria-chang/everyone-always-says-that-having-kids-is-messy-and-sloppy-it-s-true/)

[Victoria Chang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victoria-chang/)

> [I'm all about the child-rearing propaganda. Do the kids thing, do the family thing. If anything, it just makes you a better artist. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greta-lee/i-m-all-about-the-child-rearing-propaganda-do-the-kids-thing-do-the/)

[Greta Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greta-lee/)

> [Parents are the ultimate role models for children. Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-keeshan/parents-are-the-ultimate-role-models-for-children-every-word-movement/)

[Bob Keeshan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-keeshan/)

> [One of the greatest influences a person can have in this world is to influence a child.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rosemary-m-wixom/one-of-the-greatest-influences-a-person-can-have-in-this-world-is-to/)

[Rosemary M. Wixom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rosemary-m-wixom/)

> [The popular idea of a role model implies that an adult's influence on a child is primarily occupational, and that all a black child…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-rodriguez/the-popular-idea-of-a-role-model-implies-that-an-adult-s-influence-on/)

[Richard Rodriguez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-rodriguez/)

> [Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a greater influence on a child than the parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-keeshan/every-word-movement-and-action-has-an-effect-no-other-person-or/)

[Bob Keeshan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-keeshan/)

> [“Seriously, far beyond whether you have a natural birth or not, use cloth diapers or don't, opt to breastfeed or use formula, the two…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katherine-ladny-mitchell/seriously-far-beyond-whether-you-have-a-natural-birth-or-not-use/)

[Katherine Ladny Mitchell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katherine-ladny-mitchell/)

> [The most important influence on a child is the character of its parents, rather than this or that single event.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erich-fromm/the-most-important-influence-on-a-child-is-the-character-of-its/)

[Erich Fromm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erich-fromm/)

> [Michael Landon was the biggest influence. As a child, I watched him write, direct, star, and produce a TV show every week. He showed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patrick-labyorteaux/michael-landon-was-the-biggest-influence-as-a-child-i-watched-him/)

[Patrick Labyorteaux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patrick-labyorteaux/)

## More by Meg Meeker

> [“Hanging on to stuff doesn’t keep us more connected to people, places, or past moments. Our memories do that, so we can let go.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/hanging-on-to-stuff-doesn-t-keep-us-more-connected-to-people-places/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Fatigue controls most of what you do or don’t do during the day. Everywhere you turn you feel like you simply aren’t giving enough.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/fatigue-controls-most-of-what-you-do-or-don-t-do-during-the-day/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“We search for something we cannot grab hold of, something that will satisfy our deep longing. But since we usually look in the wrong…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/we-search-for-something-we-cannot-grab-hold-of-something-that-will/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“We simply must accept that they are loaned to us for a time and then they are released into adulthood. When we believe this,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/we-simply-must-accept-that-they-are-loaned-to-us-for-a-time-and-then/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“But love isn't just about feeling good. It's about doing what you don't want to do, over and over again, if it needs to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/but-love-isn-t-just-about-feeling-good-it-s-about-doing-what-you-don/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“The tricky part about discovering our giftedness is that it may be in an area that feels unexpected.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/the-tricky-part-about-discovering-our-giftedness-is-that-it-may-be-in/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Friends who love us know that motherhood is about transitioning--and adjusting, constantly, to those changes. We must become masters of change because that is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/friends-who-love-us-know-that-motherhood-is-about-transitioning-and/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Our ability to appropriately process messages becomes overloaded. When we try to process too much too fast, our sensibilities become dulled and we lose…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/our-ability-to-appropriately-process-messages-becomes-overloaded-when/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Humility, however, prevents bullying and being bullied. When your daughter recognizes that all humans have equal value and never esteems herself above another, she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/humility-however-prevents-bullying-and-being-bullied-when-your/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“She felt indispensable and made no apologies. She allowed herself to accept her importance and this is something many of us mothers refuse to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/she-felt-indispensable-and-made-no-apologies-she-allowed-herself-to/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Love that comes easily satisfies only a little. Love that requires us to say things that are right and good, to extend comfort and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/love-that-comes-easily-satisfies-only-a-little-love-that-requires-us/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“So when a spouse drives us crazy, we must draw on the same internal grit that we use with our kids. Instead of complaining,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/so-when-a-spouse-drives-us-crazy-we-must-draw-on-the-same-internal/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“If every mother in the United States could wrap her mind around her true value as a woman and mother, her life would never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/if-every-mother-in-the-united-states-could-wrap-her-mind-around-her/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Real love is gritty. It sweats and waits, it causes you to hold your tongue when you want to scream obscenities in anger, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/real-love-is-gritty-it-sweats-and-waits-it-causes-you-to-hold-your/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

> [“Religion is between man and man but faith exists between God and human beings.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/religion-is-between-man-and-man-but-faith-exists-between-god-and/)

[Meg Meeker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

[Explore all 19 Meg Meeker quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/)

## More Character development quotes

> [“It is hardly necessary to stress the fact that the ability to love as an act of giving depends on the character development of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erich-fromm/it-is-hardly-necessary-to-stress-the-fact-that-the-ability-to-love-as/)

[Erich Fromm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erich-fromm/)

> [I was looking for something that, was different and that would challenge me in a different way, that was fun and people I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emilie-de-ravin/i-was-looking-for-something-that-was-different-and-that-would/)

[Emilie De Ravin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emilie-de-ravin/)

> [I feel that Pride and Prejudice is an incredibly well constructed novel on every level. The dialogue is great. The character development is great.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/i-feel-that-pride-and-prejudice-is-an-incredibly-well-constructed/)

[Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/)

> [“Perfection should generally be avoided in a character. Real people, such as your readers, aren’t flawless and chances are they are not going to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/craig-hart/perfection-should-generally-be-avoided-in-a-character-real-people/)

[Craig Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/craig-hart/)

> [“A relationship built on lies and trickery will not last; only truthfulness can uphold a relationship”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/idowu-koyenikan/a-relationship-built-on-lies-and-trickery-will-not-last-only/)

[idowu koyenikan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/idowu-koyenikan/)

> [“I am really excited about the Gemini Ascending series. If like me, you never wanted 'Game of Thrones' or 'Lord of the Rings' to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-john-terranova/i-am-really-excited-about-the-gemini-ascending-series-if-like-me-you/)

[Mark John Terranova](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-john-terranova/)

> [When I play a game, I want to play, not necessarily laugh. If you try to make me laugh at the expense of interactivity,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-tennapel/when-i-play-a-game-i-want-to-play-not-necessarily-laugh-if-you-try-to/)

[Doug TenNapel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-tennapel/)

> [I don't know who will overcome losses, some losses aren't meant to be overcome, but all losses make for good stories and good character…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kirsten-vangsness/i-don-t-know-who-will-overcome-losses-some-losses-aren-t-meant-to-be/)

[Kirsten Vangsness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kirsten-vangsness/)

> [Meditation may require a lifetime to master, but it will have been a lifetime well spent. ... If you want to judge your progress,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eknath-easwaran/meditation-may-require-a-lifetime-to-master-but-it-will-have-been-a/)

[Eknath Easwaran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eknath-easwaran/)

> [Stand alone books are nice because they have everything all in one tidy little package. Neverwhere was awesome because you get action, adventure, character…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patrick-rothfuss/stand-alone-books-are-nice-because-they-have-everything-all-in-one/)

[Patrick Rothfuss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patrick-rothfuss/)

> [I'm a lot more focused on character development and showing more of my character's emotions and persona inside the ring rather than just going…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bobby-roode/i-m-a-lot-more-focused-on-character-development-and-showing-more-of/)

[Bobby Roode](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bobby-roode/)

> [Education is character development, harmonious completion of human personality. But what the state accomplishes in this field is dull drill, extinction of natural feeling,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rudolf-rocker/education-is-character-development-harmonious-completion-of-human/)

[Rudolf Rocker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rudolf-rocker/)

> [“He'd done his walls with paint from Holy Basil. God, I yearned for their colors. I hadn't been able to afford them myself but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marian-keyes/he-d-done-his-walls-with-paint-from-holy-basil-god-i-yearned-for/)

[Marian Keyes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marian-keyes/)

> [“There would be a time when the world created people stronger than them. When all of this got worked out. But until then there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-eggers/there-would-be-a-time-when-the-world-created-people-stronger-than/)

[Dave Eggers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-eggers/)

> [I've listened to Bollywood music willingly now. That's a huge character development for me, I must say.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iman-vellani/i-ve-listened-to-bollywood-music-willingly-now-that-s-a-huge/)

[Iman Vellani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/iman-vellani/)

[Browse all 129 Character development quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/character-development/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have ultimate control over who our kids become when they are adults. We therefore believe that every decision we make can potentially alter the outcome of their lives. And this is an enormous burden to carry. I want to be clear here. Parents are the primary influence in a child’s life concerning character development, but the truth is, even our influence is very limited.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Meg Meeker"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sense-that-we-have-ultimate/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Character development"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sense-that-we-have-ultimate/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99e/meg-meeker-24664_character-developmen_in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sens_2493200.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“In short, we live with an overriding sense that we have ultimate control over who our kids become when they…” — Meg Meeker",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Meg Meeker",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-meeker/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“In short, we live with an...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sense-that-we-have-ultimate/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-meeker/in-short-we-live-with-an-overriding-sense-that-we-have-ultimate/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
