--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It's never over. Not really. Not when you…" description: "\"“It's never over. Not really. Not when you stay down there as long as I did, not when you've lived in the netherworld longer than you've lived in this ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e4c/marya-hornbacher-2109_elementary-school_it-s-never-over-not-really-not-when-you_1095077.jpg" --- # It's never over. Not really. Not when you stay down there… ![“It's never over. Not really. Not when you stay down there as long as I did, not when you've lived in the netherworld longer than you've lived in this material one, where things are very bright and large and make such strange noises. You never come back, not all the way. Always, there is an odd…” quote by Marya Hornbacher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e4c/marya-hornbacher-2109_elementary-school_it-s-never-over-not-really-not-when-you_1095077.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e4c/marya-hornbacher-2109_elementary-school_it-s-never-over-not-really-not-when-you_1095077.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e4c/marya-hornbacher-2109_elementary-school_it-s-never-over-not-really-not-when-you_1095077.jpg) > ““It's never over. Not really. Not when you stay down there as long as I did, not when you've lived in the netherworld longer than you've lived in this material one, where things are very bright and large and make such strange noises. You never come back, not all the way. Always, there is an odd distance between you and the people you love and the people you meet, a barrier, thin as the glass of a mirror. You never come all the way out of the mirror; you stand, for the rest of your life, with one foot in this world and one in another, where everything is upside down and backward and sad. It is the distance of marred memory, of a twisted and shape-shifting past. When people talk about their childhood, their adolescence, their college days, I laugh along and try not to think: that was when I was throwing up in my elementary school bathroom, that was when I was sleeping with strangers to show off the sharp tips of my bones, that was when I lost sight of my soul and died. And it is the distance of the present, as well - the distance that lies between people in general because of the different lives we have lived. I don't know who I would be, now, if I had not lived the life I have, and so I cannot alter my need for distance - nor can I lessen the low and omnipresent pain that that distance creates. The entirety of my life is overshadowed by one singular and near-fatal obsession.”” [Marya Hornbacher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marya-hornbacher/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Life leaves a lingering sense of being split between past trauma and present reality, creating an enduring emotional distance. **In simple terms:** Past and present create a lasting inner divide. Key Takeaway Seek integration of past and present. Themes psychology trauma identity Mood introspective melancholic Type memoir psychological When to use this quote - therapy - creative writing - support groups Key Concepts memory dissociation existential angst Questions to Reflect On - How does your past shape your present self? - What steps can bridge this inner distance? A Different Perspective Integration can be painful and uncertain. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Elementary school](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/elementary-school/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Mirror](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mirror/) [Rest of your life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rest-of-your-life/) ## Related quotes > [You never come back, not all the way. 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If you stand really far away from someone you're like, "That's not me. I'm so far away…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ottessa-moshfegh/distance-is-where-people-get-really-confused-if-you-stand-really-far/) [Ottessa Moshfegh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ottessa-moshfegh/) > [I do feel there is a certain amount of distance and apathy that's created when you feel like there's a distance between you and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rashida-jones/i-do-feel-there-is-a-certain-amount-of-distance-and-apathy-that-s/) [Rashida Jones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rashida-jones/) > [Sometimes you just have to distance yourself from people. If they care, they'll notice. If they don't, you know where you stand.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-you-just-have-to-distance-yourself-from-people-if-they-care/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Turns out grief not only morphs time, but space too. 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TOO CLOSE, AND THEY OVERWHELM YOU, TOO FAR AND THEY ABANDON YOU.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hanif-kureishi/you-have-to-find-the-right-distance-between-people-too-close-and-they/) [Hanif Kureishi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hanif-kureishi/) > [Sometimes you just need to distance yourself from people and their negativity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-you-just-need-to-distance-yourself-from-people-and-their/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Sometimes you have to distance yourself from people. If they care, they will notice and be bothered. If they dont, you will know where…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-you-have-to-distance-yourself-from-people-if-they-care-they/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Marya Hornbacher > [“Something had been confirmed: I was worth giving a shit about; I was getting to be a successful sick person. 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Not really. Not when you stay down there as long as I did, not when you've lived in the netherworld longer than you've lived in this material one, where things are very bright and large and make such strange noises. You never come back, not all the way. Always, there is an odd distance between you and the people you love and the people you meet, a barrier, thin as the glass of a mirror. You never come all the way out of the mirror; you stand, for the rest of your life, with one foot in this world and one in another, where everything is upside down and backward and sad. It is the distance of marred memory, of a twisted and shape-shifting past. When people talk about their childhood, their adolescence, their college days, I laugh along and try not to think: that was when I was throwing up in my elementary school bathroom, that was when I was sleeping with strangers to show off the sharp tips of my bones, that was when I lost sight of my soul and died. And it is the distance of the present, as well - the distance that lies between people in general because of the different lives we have lived. I don't know who I would be, now, if I had not lived the life I have, and so I cannot alter my need for distance - nor can I lessen the low and omnipresent pain that that distance creates. 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