--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: In nonviolent communication, no matter…" description: "\"In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and r..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/534/marshall-b-rosenberg-1145_allowing_in-nonviolent-communication-no-matter-wh_2780114.jpg" --- # In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others… ![“In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully…” quote by Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/534/marshall-b-rosenberg-1145_allowing_in-nonviolent-communication-no-matter-wh_2780114.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/534/marshall-b-rosenberg-1145_allowing_in-nonviolent-communication-no-matter-wh_2780114.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/534/marshall-b-rosenberg-1145_allowing_in-nonviolent-communication-no-matter-wh_2780114.jpg) > “In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.” [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Effective communication requires listening to observable facts, emotions, needs, and requests, then reflecting back before offering solutions. **In simple terms:** Listen to facts, feelings, needs, then reflect before solving. Key Takeaway Practice empathetic listening and reflection. Themes communication empathy conflict resolution Mood empathetic thoughtful Type instructional inspirational When to use this quote - relationships - workplace - mediation - customer service Key Concepts psychology interpersonal skills Questions to Reflect On - How can you separate observation from evaluation? - What strategies help maintain empathy? A Different Perspective It can be difficult to stay nonjudgmental when emotions run high. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Allowing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/allowing/) [Attention](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/attention/) [Communication](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/communication/) [Empathy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/empathy/) [Empathy Allowing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/empathy-allowing-3304574/) [Feelings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feelings/) [Matter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/matter/) [May](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/may/) [Needs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/needs/) [No matter what](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/no-matter-what/) [Nonviolent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nonviolent/) [Nonviolent communication](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nonviolent-communication/) [Observation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/observation/) [Opportunity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/opportunity/) [Paraphrasing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/paraphrasing/) [Relief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relief/) [Request](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/request/) [Solutions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/solutions/) [Stay Empathy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/stay-empathy-3304575/) [Turns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/turns/) [Understood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understood/) [Use](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/use/) [Wish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wish/) ## Related quotes > [The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way: it is to establish relationships…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/the-objective-of-nonviolent-communication-is-not-to-change-people-and/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Two things distinguish nonviolent actions from violent actions. First, you don't see an enemy and second, your intention is not to make the other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/two-things-distinguish-nonviolent-actions-from-violent-actions-first/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Nonviolent Communication shows us a way of being very honest, but without any criticism, without any insults, without any put-downs, without any intellectual diagnosis…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/nonviolent-communication-shows-us-a-way-of-being-very-honest-but/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Nonviolent Communication is a way of keeping our consciousness tuned in moment by moment to that beauty within ourselves and others, and not saying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/nonviolent-communication-is-a-way-of-keeping-our-consciousness-tuned/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [In NVC, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/in-nvc-no-matter-what-words-others-may-use-to-express-themselves-we/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [When it comes to giving advice, never do so unless you've first received a request in writing, signed by a lawyer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/when-it-comes-to-giving-advice-never-do-so-unless-you-ve-first/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Don't get addicted to your requests. Your objective is needs, not requests. Because then it becomes a demand.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/don-t-get-addicted-to-your-requests-your-objective-is-needs-not/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [The number one reason that we don't get our needs met, we don't express them. We express judgments. If we do express needs, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/the-number-one-reason-that-we-don-t-get-our-needs-met-we-don-t/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Any time you throw pain at a Jackal without a clear present request, within a millisecond he'll jump in.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/any-time-you-throw-pain-at-a-jackal-without-a-clear-present-request/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [There are the two main reasons we don't get our needs met. First, we don't know how to express our needs to begin with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/there-are-the-two-main-reasons-we-don-t-get-our-needs-met-first-we/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Schools in which students and teachers relate as partners-where Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication is part of every interaction are communities of learning, rather than top-down,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/riane-eisler/schools-in-which-students-and-teachers-relate-as-partners-where/) [Riane Eisler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/riane-eisler/) > [Educators committed to engaging in the long-term, often difficult work of strengthening their relationships with colleagues, students and parents and expanding their opportunities for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ron-rubin/educators-committed-to-engaging-in-the-long-term-often-difficult-work/) [Ron Rubin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ron-rubin/) > [Teachers, parents and school administrators: Today's teachers can create a Planet of Peace. The communication process you will learn by reading Nonviolent Communication is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-muller/teachers-parents-and-school-administrators-today-s-teachers-can/) [Robert Muller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-muller/) > [The extraordinary language of Nonviolent Communication is changing how parents relate to children, teachers to students, and how we all related to each other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bernie-glassman/the-extraordinary-language-of-nonviolent-communication-is-changing/) [Bernie Glassman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bernie-glassman/) > [A second person that's come to my life very recently, and I'm thankful for it, is Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of the Nonviolent Communication…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandra-cisneros/a-second-person-that-s-come-to-my-life-very-recently-and-i-m-thankful/) [Sandra Cisneros](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandra-cisneros/) ## More by Marshall B. Rosenberg > [When you need empathy, you cannot give empathy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/when-you-need-empathy-you-cannot-give-empathy/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Understanding the other persons' needs does not mean you have to give up on your own needs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/understanding-the-other-persons-needs-does-not-mean-you-have-to-give/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Plans to exact retribution are never going to make us safer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/plans-to-exact-retribution-are-never-going-to-make-us-safer/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [NVC gives us tools and understanding to create a more peaceful state of mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/nvc-gives-us-tools-and-understanding-to-create-a-more-peaceful-state/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [What I want in my life is compassion a flow between myself and others based on mutual giving from the heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/what-i-want-in-my-life-is-compassion-a-flow-between-myself-and-others/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Analyses of others are actually expressions of our own needs and values](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/analyses-of-others-are-actually-expressions-of-our-own-needs-and/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Staying with empathy we allow speakers to touch deeper levels of themselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/staying-with-empathy-we-allow-speakers-to-touch-deeper-levels-of/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Punishment is the root of violence on our planet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/punishment-is-the-root-of-violence-on-our-planet/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Often, instead of offering empathy, we have a strong urge to give advice or reassurance and to explain our own position or feeling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/often-instead-of-offering-empathy-we-have-a-strong-urge-to-give/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [NVC is founded on language and communication skills that strengthen our ability to remain human, even under trying conditions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/nvc-is-founded-on-language-and-communication-skills-that-strengthen/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Ask before offering advice or reassurance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/ask-before-offering-advice-or-reassurance/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [If you think ahead to what to say next - like how to fix it or make the person feel better - BOOM! Off…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/if-you-think-ahead-to-what-to-say-next-like-how-to-fix-it-or-make-the/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Two questions help us see why we are unlikely to get what we want by using punishment... The first question is: What do I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/two-questions-help-us-see-why-we-are-unlikely-to-get-what-we-want-by/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/praise-and-reward-create-a-system-of-extrinsic-motivations-for/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) > [Everything we do is in service of our needs. When this one concept is applied to our view of others, we'll see that we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marshall-b-rosenberg/everything-we-do-is-in-service-of-our-needs-when-this-one-concept-is/) [Marshall B. Rosenberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) [Explore all 283 Marshall B. Rosenberg quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marshall-b-rosenberg/) ## More Allowing quotes > [New generations of humans inherit the acquired discoveries of generations past, allowing cosmic insight to accumulate without limit. Each discovery of science therefore adds…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-degrasse-tyson/new-generations-of-humans-inherit-the-acquired-discoveries-of/) [Neil deGrasse Tyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-degrasse-tyson/) > [Is the minor convenience of allowing the present generation the luxury of doubling its energy consumption every 10 years worth the major hazard of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-r-brower/is-the-minor-convenience-of-allowing-the-present-generation-the/) [David R. Brower](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-r-brower/) > [When you are not honoring the present moment by allowing it to be, you are creating drama.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eckhart-tolle/when-you-are-not-honoring-the-present-moment-by-allowing-it-to-be-you/) [Eckhart Tolle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eckhart-tolle/) > [“Once again I was shamelessly allowing myself to be defined by another person.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ginny-babcock-kinflicks/once-again-i-was-shamelessly-allowing-myself-to-be-defined-by-another/) [Ginny Babcock Kinflicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ginny-babcock-kinflicks/) > [Even when I was saying I was Agnostic and trying to figure out my thoughts, I felt God was allowing me to do that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alfre-woodard/even-when-i-was-saying-i-was-agnostic-and-trying-to-figure-out-my/) [Alfre Woodard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alfre-woodard/) > [By allowing multiple partners to contribute, an open platform can nurture an entire ecosystem of developers and apps. Good products integrate and become great…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryan-holmes/by-allowing-multiple-partners-to-contribute-an-open-platform-can/) [Ryan Holmes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryan-holmes/) > [When you ask for patience, what you get is a line at the bank. In other words, life gives you the people, places, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracy-mcmillan/when-you-ask-for-patience-what-you-get-is-a-line-at-the-bank-in-other/) [Tracy McMillan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tracy-mcmillan/) > [Sometimes, I get afraid it has defined me, that sense of grief, loss and illness. But actually, it is about allowing myself to take…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-i-get-afraid-it-has-defined-me-that-sense-of-grief-loss-and/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Meditation is actually a very simple exercise in resting in the natural state of your present mind, and allowing yourself to be simply and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yongey-mingyur-rinpoche/meditation-is-actually-a-very-simple-exercise-in-resting-in-the/) [Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yongey-mingyur-rinpoche/) > [When you're still, and some actors are really brilliant at that, you bring a kind of energy to you as opposed to sending the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabriel-byrne/when-you-re-still-and-some-actors-are-really-brilliant-at-that-you/) [Gabriel Byrne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabriel-byrne/) > [The only reason I would write a break-up song is because my own problem of allowing myself to relate to people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zola-jesus/the-only-reason-i-would-write-a-break-up-song-is-because-my-own/) [Zola Jesus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zola-jesus/) > [I just think fashion is about enjoying yourself and being comfortable in your skin and allowing you to be you - all the way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-scott/i-just-think-fashion-is-about-enjoying-yourself-and-being-comfortable/) [Jill Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-scott/) > [I don't think there's any harm at all in allowing a kid to fantasize. In fact, I think to stop people from fantasizing is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-k-rowling-2/i-don-t-think-there-s-any-harm-at-all-in-allowing-a-kid-to-fantasize/) [J. K. Rowling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-k-rowling-2/) > [All I wanted to do was put together one of the best home maths systems in the world, and that's what we've done. I've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carol-vorderman/all-i-wanted-to-do-was-put-together-one-of-the-best-home-maths/) [Carol Vorderman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carol-vorderman/) > [I want to deal with the homeless situation here in Washington, D.C. I think it is a travesty that we've got men - and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barack-obama/i-want-to-deal-with-the-homeless-situation-here-in-washington-d-c-i/) [Barack Obama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barack-obama/) [Browse all 916 Allowing quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/allowing/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Marshall B. 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