--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is…" description: "\"But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing; sharing it with strangers is quite another.\" — Marie Brennan" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg" --- # But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing… ![“But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing; sharing it with strangers is quite another.” quote by Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg) > “But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing; sharing it with strangers is quite another.” [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Accepting personal grief is a personal process, while sharing it publicly creates a different, communal experience. **In simple terms:** Sorrow is personal; sharing it is communal. Key Takeaway Balance private healing with open sharing. Themes grief community vulnerability Mood reflective empathetic Type personal therapeutic When to use this quote - counseling sessions - support groups - journaling - public speaking Key Concepts psychology social connection Questions to Reflect On - How does sharing sorrow change its impact? - What risks and benefits arise from opening up? A Different Perspective Sharing may expose one to judgment or misunderstanding. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Sorrow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sorrow/) [Stranger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/stranger/) [Strangers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/strangers/) ## Related quotes > [“Searching my heart for its true sorrow, This is the thing I find to be: That I am weary of words and people, Sick…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edna-st-vincent-millay/searching-my-heart-for-its-true-sorrow-this-is-the-thing-i-find-to-be/) [Edna St. Vincent Millay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edna-st-vincent-millay/) > [“People talk of sorrow as if it is soft, a thing of water and tears. But true sorrow is not soft. True sorrow is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurell-k-hamilton/people-talk-of-sorrow-as-if-it-is-soft-a-thing-of-water-and-tears-but-2/) [Laurell K. Hamilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurell-k-hamilton/) > [“We are no longer the same, you wiser but not sadder, and I sadder but not wiser, for wiser I could hardly become without…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-beckett/we-are-no-longer-the-same-you-wiser-but-not-sadder-and-i-sadder-but/) [Samuel Beckett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-beckett/) > [People talk of sorrow as if it is soft, a thing of water and tears. But true sorrow is not soft. True sorrow is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurell-k-hamilton/people-talk-of-sorrow-as-if-it-is-soft-a-thing-of-water-and-tears-but/) [Laurell K. 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Sorrow is a thing with teeth, and while in time it retreats, it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/sorrow-is-not-a-raven-perched-persistently-above-a-chamber-door/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [The funny thing is, strangers still seem to feel comfortable coming up to me and saying things, but now usually it's because they recognize…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/todd-solondz/the-funny-thing-is-strangers-still-seem-to-feel-comfortable-coming-up/) [Todd Solondz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/todd-solondz/) > [Fifty or sixty shooters had already arrived and managed to look studiously bored. I knew a few of them and nodded politely. No one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-c-dietz/fifty-or-sixty-shooters-had-already-arrived-and-managed-to-look/) William C. Dietz > [Either a mother and daughter know each other very well or they are strangers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/either-a-mother-and-daughter-know-each-other-very-well-or-they-are/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The desire to believe the best of people is a prerequisite for intercourse with strangers; suspicion is reserved for friends.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-mccarthy/the-desire-to-believe-the-best-of-people-is-a-prerequisite-for/) [Mary McCarthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-mccarthy/) > [“It is true I am a complete stranger to these people, but they are not strangers to me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fyodor-dostoevsky/it-is-true-i-am-a-complete-stranger-to-these-people-but-they-are-not/) [Fyodor Dostoevsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fyodor-dostoevsky/) > [Good things happen when you meet strangers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yo-yo-ma/good-things-happen-when-you-meet-strangers/) [Yo-Yo Ma](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yo-yo-ma/) > [“Our bodies aren't strangers,' he said, his voice ragged. 'Our spirits aren't strangers'. He held her face in his hands. 'Tell me what part…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melina-marchetta/our-bodies-aren-t-strangers-he-said-his-voice-ragged-our-spirits-aren/) [Melina Marchetta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melina-marchetta/) > [It’s sad when friends become enemies. But what’s even worse is when they become strangers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hayley-williams/it-s-sad-when-friends-become-enemies-but-what-s-even-worse-is-when/) [Hayley Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hayley-williams/) > [A place has almost the shyness of a person, with strangers; and its secret is not to be surprised by a too direct interrogation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-symons/a-place-has-almost-the-shyness-of-a-person-with-strangers-and-its/) [Arthur Symons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-symons/) ## More by Marie Brennan > [“She reached out with her free hand, and when it came back, it glowed with a shaft of impossible light.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/she-reached-out-with-her-free-hand-and-when-it-came-back-it-glowed/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“Just as Manda Lewis's impressions of the world had been informed by her reading-- leading her to expect balls, duels, and conveniently timed thunderstorms…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/just-as-manda-lewis-s-impressions-of-the-world-had-been-informed-by/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“And all the while I have people telling me, at least you still have something of your husband . Do they mean the book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/and-all-the-while-i-have-people-telling-me-at-least-you-still-have/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“More shouts, and then my father was there, staring down at me in horror: the minor pagan god, appalled at what his worshiper had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/more-shouts-and-then-my-father-was-there-staring-down-at-me-in-horror/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“I wish it could have been otherwise. But in the end … this is part of our past, whether we are proud to admit it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/i-wish-it-could-have-been-otherwise-but-in-the-end-this-is-part-of/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“Their characteristics are well-known. They're beautiful -- when they're not astoundingly ugly. 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Night is both blacker and more brilliant than you can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/you-may-think-you-see-plenty-of-stars-friend-reader-but-you-are-wrong/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“Utopias bore me. I'm interested in constructing messy, complicated societies that are full of flaws and then saying, ooh, this is interesting, let's see…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/utopias-bore-me-i-m-interested-in-constructing-messy-complicated/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“This was London, in all its filth and glory. Nostalgic for the past, while yearning to cast off the chains of bygone ages and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/this-was-london-in-all-its-filth-and-glory-nostalgic-for-the-past/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [Matriarchy is a time-honored staple for any writer looking to invent an exotic society.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/matriarchy-is-a-time-honored-staple-for-any-writer-looking-to-invent/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“Be warned, then: the collected volumes of this series will contain frozen mountains, foetid swamps, hostile foreigners, hostile fellow countrymen, the occasional hostile family…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/be-warned-then-the-collected-volumes-of-this-series-will-contain/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“Once we love, we cannot revoke it,' she said. 'We can only glory in what it brings -- pain as well as joy, grief…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/once-we-love-we-cannot-revoke-it-she-said-we-can-only-glory-in-what/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) > [“You and I are not held to the same standards, Andrew. People will forgive a slip, a weakness, a minor personal folly — when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/you-and-i-are-not-held-to-the-same-standards-andrew-people-will/) [Marie Brennan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) [Explore all 23 Marie Brennan quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/) ## More Grief quotes > [“...they had lived, they'd lived intensely. But no matter how deeply you live, it comes to this in the end: one of you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-morton/they-had-lived-they-d-lived-intensely-but-no-matter-how-deeply-you/) [Brian Morton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-morton/) > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [You felt a deep sorrow, the kind of melancholy you feel when you're in a beautiful place and the sun is going down](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thrity-umrigar/you-felt-a-deep-sorrow-the-kind-of-melancholy-you-feel-when-you-re-in/) [Thrity Umrigar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thrity-umrigar/) > [... how much of our inner substance is it good for us to give to public griefs? The whole modern tendency to agonize over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-bogan/how-much-of-our-inner-substance-is-it-good-for-us-to-give-to-public/) [Louise Bogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-bogan/) > [You dont choose your life; it chooses you. Theres no point asking why life has reserved certain joys or griefs, you just accept them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/you-dont-choose-your-life-it-chooses-you-theres-no-point-asking-why/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [“When we learn to attribute meaning to the events in our lives, we connect with our Higher Purpose, Higher Wisdom, or Source; we become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-barbara-apollon/when-we-learn-to-attribute-meaning-to-the-events-in-our-lives-we/) [Susan Barbara Apollon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-barbara-apollon/) > [Only to have a grief equal to all these tears!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-rich/only-to-have-a-grief-equal-to-all-these-tears/) [Adrienne Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-rich/) > [Nowadays most people wear black most of the time anyway: go to a literary party and one would imagine everyone there was in perpetual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-weldon/nowadays-most-people-wear-black-most-of-the-time-anyway-go-to-a/) [Fay Weldon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-weldon/) > [Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/suppressed-grief-suffocates-it-rages-within-the-breast-and-is-forced/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [That Woman is in love with her own grief.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-zevin/that-woman-is-in-love-with-her-own-grief/) [Gabrielle Zevin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-zevin/) > [Short time seems long in sorrow's sharp sustaining.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/short-time-seems-long-in-sorrow-s-sharp-sustaining/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [These days grief seems like walking on a frozen river; most of the time he feels safe enough, but there is always that danger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/these-days-grief-seems-like-walking-on-a-frozen-river-most-of-the/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [“You've been my beacon of light in my storm of grief, and I don't know if I could live without you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-ashley/you-ve-been-my-beacon-of-light-in-my-storm-of-grief-and-i-don-t-know/) [Katie Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-ashley/) > [Ancient eyes had stared at me, filled with ancient grief. And something more. Something so alien and unexpected that I'd almost burst into tears.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/ancient-eyes-had-stared-at-me-filled-with-ancient-grief-and-something/) [Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/) > [Meanwhile, the trees were just as green as before; the birds sang and the sun shone as clearly now as ever. The familiar surroundings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/meanwhile-the-trees-were-just-as-green-as-before-the-birds-sang-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) [Browse all 8,012 Grief quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing; sharing it with strangers is quite another.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Marie Brennan" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is-one-thing-sharing-it-with/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Grief" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is-one-thing-sharing-it-with/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e5/marie-brennan-25363_grief_but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is_873636.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“But coming to terms with one’s sorrow is one thing; sharing it with strangers is quite another.” — Marie Brennan", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Marie Brennan", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-brennan/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "But coming to terms with one’s...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is-one-thing-sharing-it-with/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-brennan/but-coming-to-terms-with-one-s-sorrow-is-one-thing-sharing-it-with/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```