--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We are, when we love, in an abnormal…" description: "\"“We are, when we love, in an abnormal state, capable of giving at once to the most apparently simple accident, an accident which may at any moment occu..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22b/marcel-proust-114_happiness_we-are-when-we-love-in-an-abnormal-state_62544.jpg" --- # We are, when we love, in an abnormal state, capable of… ![“We are, when we love, in an abnormal state, capable of giving at once to the most apparently simple accident, an accident which may at any moment occur, a seriousness which in itself it would not entail. What makes us so happy is the presence in our hearts of an unstable element which we contrive…” quote by Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22b/marcel-proust-114_happiness_we-are-when-we-love-in-an-abnormal-state_62544.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22b/marcel-proust-114_happiness_we-are-when-we-love-in-an-abnormal-state_62544.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22b/marcel-proust-114_happiness_we-are-when-we-love-in-an-abnormal-state_62544.jpg) > ““We are, when we love, in an abnormal state, capable of giving at once to the most apparently simple accident, an accident which may at any moment occur, a seriousness which in itself it would not entail. What makes us so happy is the presence in our hearts of an unstable element which we contrive perpetually to maintain and of which we cease almost to be aware so long as it is not displaced. In reality, there is in love a permanent strain of suffering which happiness neutralises, make potential only, postpones, but which may at any moment become, what it would long since have been had we not obtained what we wanted, excruciating.”” [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Love creates a paradoxical tension: it amplifies both joy and latent suffering, making us vulnerable to sudden pain while we remain unaware of the underlying strain. **In simple terms:** Love is a fragile balance of joy and hidden pain. Key Takeaway Joy and suffering coexist in love. Themes paradox vulnerability emotional tension impermanence awareness Mood melancholic reflective Type philosophical literary When to use this quote - a new romantic relationship - a long‑term partnership facing challenges - a moment of unexpected loss Key Concepts emotional duality psychological strain transient happiness Practical Applications - counseling to recognize hidden distress - creative writing exploring love's complexity Questions to Reflect On - How does recognizing love's hidden strain change our experience of joy? - Can we sustain happiness without confronting underlying suffering? ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) ## Related quotes > [“In reality, there is in love a permanent strain of suffering which happiness neutralises, makes potential only, postpones, but which may at any moment…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/in-reality-there-is-in-love-a-permanent-strain-of-suffering-which/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [In reality, in love there is a permanent suffering which joy neutralizes, renders virtual delays, but which can at any moment become what it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/in-reality-in-love-there-is-a-permanent-suffering-which-joy/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Love at first sight is a temporary love , permanent always originate from the heart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/osunsakin-adewale/love-at-first-sight-is-a-temporary-love-permanent-always-originate/) [Osunsakin Adewale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/osunsakin-adewale/) > [“Love is the most permanent of things, nothing can really shake it, I wished I knew that years ago”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marsha-gomes-mckie/love-is-the-most-permanent-of-things-nothing-can-really-shake-it-i/) Marsha Gomes-Mckie > [Attraction Is A Temporary Love But Love Is The Permanent Attraction](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-prince/attraction-is-a-temporary-love-but-love-is-the-permanent-attraction/) [Julie Prince](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-prince/) > [Your trial is temporary, but God’s Love is permanent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bo-sanchez/your-trial-is-temporary-but-god-s-love-is-permanent/) [Bo Sanchez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bo-sanchez/) > [Love is an incurable disease. In love, there is permanent suffering. Those who love and those who are happy are not the same.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alain-de-botton/love-is-an-incurable-disease-in-love-there-is-permanent-suffering/) [Alain de Botton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alain-de-botton/) > [The third error leading to the assumption that there is nothing to be learned about love lies in the confusion between the initial experience…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erich-fromm/the-third-error-leading-to-the-assumption-that-there-is-nothing-to-be/) [Erich Fromm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erich-fromm/) > [“(...) the woman we love ought to swim as slowly as we do, she ought to have no past of her own to look…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milan-kundera/the-woman-we-love-ought-to-swim-as-slowly-as-we-do-she-ought-to-have/) [Milan Kundera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milan-kundera/) > [“I refuse to believe you've misinterpreted my affections. I am wholly in love with you. 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That people might be temporary, but love is permanent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikita-gill/i-d-like-to-think-our-love-does-return-to-us-reincarnated-in/) [Nikita Gill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikita-gill/) > [Sometimes love is not permanent, but the feeling lasts forever](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/serdyuk-oksana/sometimes-love-is-not-permanent-but-the-feeling-lasts-forever/) [Serdyuk Oksana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/serdyuk-oksana/) > [“everything is temporary except for my love you will be long gone and i will still love you that will never go away that,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iva-ursano/everything-is-temporary-except-for-my-love-you-will-be-long-gone-and/) Iva Ursano ## More by Marcel Proust > [“machinery' of life at Versailles; and was able, too, to persuade herself that her silence, a shade of good humour or of arrogance on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/machinery-of-life-at-versailles-and-was-able-too-to-persuade-herself/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [ “For her \[Françoise\], wealth was like a necessary condition without which virtue would lack both merit and charm. She made so little distinction between… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/for-her-fran-oise-wealth-was-like-a-necessary-condition-without-which/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Knowing does not always allow us to prevent, but at least the things that we know, we hold them, if not in our hands,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/knowing-does-not-always-allow-us-to-prevent-but-at-least-the-things/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Death is in truth an illness from which we recover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/death-is-in-truth-an-illness-from-which-we-recover/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [The bonds that unite another person to our self exist only in our mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/the-bonds-that-unite-another-person-to-our-self-exist-only-in-our-mind/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [...a writer's works, like the water in an artesian well, mount to a height which is in proportion to the depth to which suffering…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/a-writer-s-works-like-the-water-in-an-artesian-well-mount-to-a-height/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Then from those profound slumbers we awake in a dawn, not knowing who we are, being nobody, newly born, ready for anything, the brain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/then-from-those-profound-slumbers-we-awake-in-a-dawn-not-knowing-who/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Art extracted from the most familiar reality does indeed exist and its domain is perhaps the largest of any.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/art-extracted-from-the-most-familiar-reality-does-indeed-exist-and/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [I find very reasonable the Celtic belief that the souls of our dearly departed are trapped in some inferior being, in an animal, aplant,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/i-find-very-reasonable-the-celtic-belief-that-the-souls-of-our-dearly/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“When you heard anyone in the middle of a talk which was being deliberately kept off the Affair announce furtively some piece of political…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/when-you-heard-anyone-in-the-middle-of-a-talk-which-was-being/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“We betroth ourselves by proxy, and then feel obliged to marry the intermediary.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/we-betroth-ourselves-by-proxy-and-then-feel-obliged-to-marry-the/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“But the old lady on the contrary, far from justifying her daughter’s fears, felt every time someone of her own age “disappeared” that she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/but-the-old-lady-on-the-contrary-far-from-justifying-her-daughter-s/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Often it is just lack of imagination that keeps a man from suffering very much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/often-it-is-just-lack-of-imagination-that-keeps-a-man-from-suffering/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“When we are nice to others, we generally lose all claim to their respect.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/when-we-are-nice-to-others-we-generally-lose-all-claim-to-their/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Nobility is often no more than the inner aspect which our egotistical feelings assume when we have not yet named and classified them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/nobility-is-often-no-more-than-the-inner-aspect-which-our-egotistical/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) [Explore all 1,113 Marcel Proust quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) ## More Happiness quotes > [Life is full of change. 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