--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: During those periods in which our…" description: "\"“During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit, though steadily diminishing, still persists, a distinction must be drawn between the bitternes..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg" --- # During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit… ![“During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit, though steadily diminishing, still persists, a distinction must be drawn between the bitterness which comes to us from our constantly thinking of the person herself and that which is revived by certain memories, some cutting speech, some word…” quote by Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg) > ““During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit, though steadily diminishing, still persists, a distinction must be drawn between the bitterness which comes to us from our constantly thinking of the person herself and that which is revived by certain memories, some cutting speech, some word in a letter that we have had from her. The various forms which that bitterness can assume we shall examine when we come to deal with another and later love affair; for the present it must suffice to say that, of these two kinds, the former is infinitely the less cruel. That is because our conception of the person, since it dwells always within ourselves, is there adorned with the halo with which we are bound before long to invest her, and bears the marks if not of the frequent solace of hope, at any rate of the tranquillity of a permanent sorrow. (It must also be observed that the image of a person who makes us suffer counts for little if anything in those complications which aggravate the unhappiness of love, prolong it and prevent our recovery, just as in certain maladies the cause is insignificant beyond comparison with the fever which follows it and the time that must elapse before our convalescence.)”” [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Reflects on two types of lingering bitterness after love: one from ongoing thoughts of the person, the other from specific painful reminders, noting the former is less cruel because it is tied to an idealized image. **In simple terms:** Two kinds of bitterness after love: ongoing thoughts vs. painful memories, former less cruel. Key Takeaway Recognize and address the source of lingering pain. Themes love memory grief psychology selfreflection Mood melancholic contemplative Type philosophical literary When to use this quote - breakups - grief counseling - personal journaling - therapy sessions Key Concepts attachment theory cognitive bias emotional processing Questions to Reflect On - What memories keep your pain alive? - How does idealizing affect recovery? A Different Perspective The idealized image may prevent realistic healing and prolong sorrow. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Anger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) [Bitterness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bitterness/) [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Love affair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-affair/) [Religion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/religion/) [Sadness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sadness/) ## Related quotes > [The certainty of a God giving meaning to life far surpasses in attractiveness the ability to behave badly with impunity. The choice would not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-camus/the-certainty-of-a-god-giving-meaning-to-life-far-surpasses-in/) [Albert Camus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-camus/) > [“sometimes I wake up in the morning, and I have to make the right choice again. The shadow of bitterness comes that fast on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-k-sorrells/sometimes-i-wake-up-in-the-morning-and-i-have-to-make-the-right/) [Amy K. Sorrells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-k-sorrells/) > [I grew up in a working class family where there was no health insurance. I saw first hand the fracturing of the American dream…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-schultz/i-grew-up-in-a-working-class-family-where-there-was-no-health/) [Howard Schultz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-schultz/) > [After bitterness comes the sweet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/after-bitterness-comes-the-sweet/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Moon and earth is the longest known stable love affair known to man kind”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-maximus/moon-and-earth-is-the-longest-known-stable-love-affair-known-to-man/) Danny Maximus > [Marriage is not a simple love affair, it's an ordeal, and the ordeal is the sacrifice of ego to a relationship in which two…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-campbell/marriage-is-not-a-simple-love-affair-it-s-an-ordeal-and-the-ordeal-is/) [Joseph Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-campbell/) > [“I'm out of the equation, an innocent bystander at the major love affair Joan is having with Joan”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francine-prose/i-m-out-of-the-equation-an-innocent-bystander-at-the-major-love/) [Francine Prose](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francine-prose/) > [“…finally I see that it’s never been me, just a blanket that keeps you warm. Easily tossed along when something flashier or someone prettier…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/finally-i-see-that-it-s-never-been-me-just-a-blanket-that-keeps-you/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [For some people, a one-night stand doesn't make any difference in a seven-year love affair. I don't believe the degree of betrayal is always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/for-some-people-a-one-night-stand-doesn-t-make-any-difference-in-a/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [Golf is like a love affair: if you don't take it seriously, it's no fun. If you do take it seriously, it breaks your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arnold-daly/golf-is-like-a-love-affair-if-you-don-t-take-it-seriously-it-s-no-fun/) Arnold Daly > [For a young man to start his career with a love affair with an older woman was quite de rigueur ... Of course, it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vita-sackville-west/for-a-young-man-to-start-his-career-with-a-love-affair-with-an-older/) [Vita Sackville-West](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vita-sackville-west/) > [I wonder if it's possible to have a love affair that lasts forever.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-warhol/i-wonder-if-it-s-possible-to-have-a-love-affair-that-lasts-forever/) [Andy Warhol](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-warhol/) > [“But what would happen … I mean, what would be so awful … if they did meet up?” “Why, it would be like the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hilary-mantel/but-what-would-happen-i-mean-what-would-be-so-awful-if-they-did-meet/) [Hilary Mantel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hilary-mantel/) > [“You can still go home a loyal wife.” - Warren Brown”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/t-m-williams/you-can-still-go-home-a-loyal-wife-warren-brown/) [T.M. Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/t-m-williams/) > [“I’m not sure how the ponies happened, though I have an inkling: “Can I get you anything?” I’ll say, getting up from a dinner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sloane-crosley/i-m-not-sure-how-the-ponies-happened-though-i-have-an-inkling-can-i/) [Sloane Crosley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sloane-crosley/) ## More by Marcel Proust > [“machinery' of life at Versailles; and was able, too, to persuade herself that her silence, a shade of good humour or of arrogance on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/machinery-of-life-at-versailles-and-was-able-too-to-persuade-herself/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [ “For her \[Françoise\], wealth was like a necessary condition without which virtue would lack both merit and charm. She made so little distinction between… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/for-her-fran-oise-wealth-was-like-a-necessary-condition-without-which/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Knowing does not always allow us to prevent, but at least the things that we know, we hold them, if not in our hands,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/knowing-does-not-always-allow-us-to-prevent-but-at-least-the-things/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Death is in truth an illness from which we recover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/death-is-in-truth-an-illness-from-which-we-recover/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [The bonds that unite another person to our self exist only in our mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/the-bonds-that-unite-another-person-to-our-self-exist-only-in-our-mind/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [...a writer's works, like the water in an artesian well, mount to a height which is in proportion to the depth to which suffering…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/a-writer-s-works-like-the-water-in-an-artesian-well-mount-to-a-height/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Then from those profound slumbers we awake in a dawn, not knowing who we are, being nobody, newly born, ready for anything, the brain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/then-from-those-profound-slumbers-we-awake-in-a-dawn-not-knowing-who/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Art extracted from the most familiar reality does indeed exist and its domain is perhaps the largest of any.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/art-extracted-from-the-most-familiar-reality-does-indeed-exist-and/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [I find very reasonable the Celtic belief that the souls of our dearly departed are trapped in some inferior being, in an animal, aplant,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/i-find-very-reasonable-the-celtic-belief-that-the-souls-of-our-dearly/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“When you heard anyone in the middle of a talk which was being deliberately kept off the Affair announce furtively some piece of political…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/when-you-heard-anyone-in-the-middle-of-a-talk-which-was-being/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“We betroth ourselves by proxy, and then feel obliged to marry the intermediary.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/we-betroth-ourselves-by-proxy-and-then-feel-obliged-to-marry-the/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“But the old lady on the contrary, far from justifying her daughter’s fears, felt every time someone of her own age “disappeared” that she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/but-the-old-lady-on-the-contrary-far-from-justifying-her-daughter-s/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [Often it is just lack of imagination that keeps a man from suffering very much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/often-it-is-just-lack-of-imagination-that-keeps-a-man-from-suffering/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“When we are nice to others, we generally lose all claim to their respect.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/when-we-are-nice-to-others-we-generally-lose-all-claim-to-their/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) > [“Nobility is often no more than the inner aspect which our egotistical feelings assume when we have not yet named and classified them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/nobility-is-often-no-more-than-the-inner-aspect-which-our-egotistical/) [Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) [Explore all 1,113 Marcel Proust quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/) ## More Anger quotes > [“If I let myself think of it the pain and anger were still fresh, adrenalin racing down my limbs to pool, hot and itchy,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kylie-ladd/if-i-let-myself-think-of-it-the-pain-and-anger-were-still-fresh/) [Kylie Ladd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kylie-ladd/) > [I receive something we might euphemistically call an 'inappropriately hostile' response - that is to say, more than fair criticism or even fair anger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-beard/i-receive-something-we-might-euphemistically-call-an-inappropriately/) [Mary Beard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-beard/) > [The vision of the left, full of envy and resentment, takes its worst toll on those at the bottom - whether black or white…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-sowell/the-vision-of-the-left-full-of-envy-and-resentment-takes-its-worst/) [Thomas Sowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-sowell/) > [Anger is a rough water; if you can canalize it into a water mill, you can benefit from it. Anything bad can be transformed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mehmet-murat-ildan/anger-is-a-rough-water-if-you-can-canalize-it-into-a-water-mill-you/) [Mehmet Murat Ildan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mehmet-murat-ildan/) > [“Some say the Earth is angry Because he wants no company; I say the Earth is angry Because he lives alone.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/n-k-jemisin/some-say-the-earth-is-angry-because-he-wants-no-company-i-say-the/) [N.K. Jemisin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/n-k-jemisin/) > [“When you feel terribly angry, you're possessed by anger ghost.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/toba-beta/when-you-feel-terribly-angry-you-re-possessed-by-anger-ghost/) [Toba Beta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/toba-beta/) > [“Medical studies have shown that cursing reduces levels of stress and pain. Repressing your anger is not healthy. It's much better to verbalize it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oliver-markus-malloy/medical-studies-have-shown-that-cursing-reduces-levels-of-stress-and/) [Oliver Markus Malloy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oliver-markus-malloy/) > [My care will be in the heart n not in words My anger will be in Words n not in the Heart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/my-care-will-be-in-the-heart-n-not-in-words-my-anger-will-be-in-words/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [You should be angry. You must not be bitter. Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. It doesn't do anything to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/you-should-be-angry-you-must-not-be-bitter-bitterness-is-like-cancer/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/to-be-a-negro-in-this-country-and-to-be-relatively-conscious-is-to-be/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/god-you-had-enough-time-to-have-been-through-it-three-times-you-ve/) [Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/) > [The present contains nothing more than the past, and what is found in the effect was already in the cause.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henri-bergson/the-present-contains-nothing-more-than-the-past-and-what-is-found-in/) [Henri Bergson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henri-bergson/) > [Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-wright/depression-is-merely-anger-without-enthusiasm/) [Steven Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-wright/) > [I always fight better when my opponent's angry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-haye/i-always-fight-better-when-my-opponent-s-angry/) [David Haye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-haye/) > [ “Where there are kashays (anger-pride-deceit-greed), there is worldly life. As long as anger-pride-deceit-greed exist; one is a sansaari \[living a worldly life\] regardless of… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dada-bhagwan/where-there-are-kashays-anger-pride-deceit-greed-there-is-worldly/) [Dada Bhagwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dada-bhagwan/) [Browse all 7,469 Anger quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anger/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit, though steadily diminishing, still persists, a distinction must be drawn between the bitterness which comes to us from our constantly thinking of the person herself and that which is revived by certain memories, some cutting speech, some word in a letter that we have had from her. The various forms which that bitterness can assume we shall examine when we come to deal with another and later love affair; for the present it must suffice to say that, of these two kinds, the former is infinitely the less cruel. That is because our conception of the person, since it dwells always within ourselves, is there adorned with the halo with which we are bound before long to invest her, and bears the marks if not of the frequent solace of hope, at any rate of the tranquillity of a permanent sorrow. (It must also be observed that the image of a person who makes us suffer counts for little if anything in those complications which aggravate the unhappiness of love, prolong it and prevent our recovery, just as in certain maladies the cause is insignificant beyond comparison with the fever which follows it and the time that must elapse before our convalescence.)”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Marcel Proust" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitterness-of-spirit-though/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Anger" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitterness-of-spirit-though/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/marcel-proust-114_anger_during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitter_2772708.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“During those periods in which our bitterness of spirit, though steadily diminishing, still persists, a…” — Marcel Proust", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Marcel Proust", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“During those periods in which our...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitterness-of-spirit-though/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/during-those-periods-in-which-our-bitterness-of-spirit-though/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```