--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: —And what's so bad about being soft like…" description: "\"“—And what's so bad about being soft like a woman? Why is it men or whoever, some poor bastard, some queen, can't be sensitive, too, if he's got a mind..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/manuel-puig-9471_men_and-what-s-so-bad-about-being-soft-like_2836613.jpg" --- # —And what's so bad about being soft like a woman? Why is… ![“—And what's so bad about being soft like a woman? Why is it men or whoever, some poor bastard, some queen, can't be sensitive, too, if he's got a mind to? —I don't know, but sometimes that kind of behavior can get in a man's way. —When? When it comes to torturing?” —No, when it comes to being…” quote by Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/manuel-puig-9471_men_and-what-s-so-bad-about-being-soft-like_2836613.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/manuel-puig-9471_men_and-what-s-so-bad-about-being-soft-like_2836613.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/manuel-puig-9471_men_and-what-s-so-bad-about-being-soft-like_2836613.jpg) > ““—And what's so bad about being soft like a woman? Why is it men or whoever, some poor bastard, some queen, can't be sensitive, too, if he's got a mind to? —I don't know, but sometimes that kind of behavior can get in a man's way. —When? When it comes to torturing?” —No, when it comes to being finished with the torturers.” —But if men acted like women there wouldn't be anymore torturers.”” [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The quote challenges gender stereotypes, suggesting that softness and sensitivity are not exclusive to women and that embracing them could reduce cruelty. **In simple terms:** Softness isn’t gendered; it can reduce cruelty. Key Takeaway Embrace sensitivity regardless of gender. Themes gender roles masculinity violence empathy Mood reflective critical thoughtful Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - relationships - workplace culture - parenting - conflict resolution Key Concepts feminist theory psychology social norms Questions to Reflect On - How does society define “softness” for men? - Can vulnerability coexist with strength? A Different Perspective Some may argue that power dynamics, not gender, drive cruelty. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) [Psychology](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/psychology/) [Torture](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/torture/) [Women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/women/) ## Related quotes > [The aim of torture is to destroy a person as a human being, to destroy their identity and soul. It is more evil than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/inge-genefke/the-aim-of-torture-is-to-destroy-a-person-as-a-human-being-to-destroy/) Inge Genefke > [The healthy man does not torture others - generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-jung/the-healthy-man-does-not-torture-others-generally-it-is-the-tortured-2/) [Carl Jung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-jung/) > [“In 2004, Jacques Derrida said that a change was under way. Torture damages the inflicter as well as the inflicted. It’s no coincidence that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-joy-fowler/in-2004-jacques-derrida-said-that-a-change-was-under-way-torture/) [Karen Joy Fowler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-joy-fowler/) > [“I realized that suspects under torture were being asked things they couldn’t possibly know about and giving answers they thought their torturers wanted to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mosab-hassan-yousef/i-realized-that-suspects-under-torture-were-being-asked-things-they/) [Mosab Hassan Yousef](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mosab-hassan-yousef/) > [“The entire affective world, constructed over the years with utmost difficulty, collapses with a kick in the father's genitals, a smack on the mother's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacobo-timerman/the-entire-affective-world-constructed-over-the-years-with-utmost/) [Jacobo Timerman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacobo-timerman/) > [Healthy men do not turn into tortures generally it is the tortured that turn into the torturers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/healthy-men-do-not-turn-into-tortures-generally-it-is-the-tortured/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“The healthy man does not torture others—generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers.” —psychiatrist Carl Jung2”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/travis-langley/the-healthy-man-does-not-torture-others-generally-it-is-the-tortured/) Travis Langley > [“So, apart from casting runes, what other hobbies do you have? Forbidden rituals, human sacrifices, torturing? –”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simona-panova/so-apart-from-casting-runes-what-other-hobbies-do-you-have-forbidden/) [Simona Panova](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simona-panova/) > [I will not be tortured, I tear torture out of myself by torturing you!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bela-lugosi/i-will-not-be-tortured-i-tear-torture-out-of-myself-by-torturing-you/) [Bela Lugosi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bela-lugosi/) > [“There are nights that the most ingenious torturers could not have invented. We emerge from them in pieces, stupid, dazed, with neither memories nor…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emil-m-cioran/there-are-nights-that-the-most-ingenious-torturers-could-not-have/) [Emil M. Cioran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emil-m-cioran/) > [“Life has enough torturers as it is, without you going around moonlighting as a Grand Inquisitor against yourself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carlos-ruiz-zafon/life-has-enough-torturers-as-it-is-without-you-going-around/) [Carlos Ruiz Zafón](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carlos-ruiz-zafon/) > [“Normally it’s the tortured who turn the tables on the unsuspecting and become the torturers. Tortured or not, you’ve got talent in this area.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/riley-murphy/normally-it-s-the-tortured-who-turn-the-tables-on-the-unsuspecting/) [Riley Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/riley-murphy/) > [The perpetrators of the Inquisition - the torturers, informers, and those who commanded their actions - were ecclesiastics of one rank or another. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sam-harris/the-perpetrators-of-the-inquisition-the-torturers-informers-and-those/) [Sam Harris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sam-harris/) > [“Of course they accused Marcão of having done it without provocation—that’s the way of torturers of every age, to put the blame on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/orson-scott-card/of-course-they-accused-marc-o-of-having-done-it-without-provocation/) [Orson Scott Card](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/orson-scott-card/) > [Torture has been privatized now, so you have obviously the whole scandal in America about the abuse of prisoners and the fact that, army…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arundhati-roy/torture-has-been-privatized-now-so-you-have-obviously-the-whole/) [Arundhati Roy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arundhati-roy/) ## More by Manuel Puig > [I think cinema is closer to allegories than to reality. It's closer to our dreams.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/i-think-cinema-is-closer-to-allegories-than-to-reality-it-s-closer-to/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [If it's great stuff, the people who consume it are nourished. It's a positive force.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/if-it-s-great-stuff-the-people-who-consume-it-are-nourished-it-s-a/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [What's better, a poetic intuition or an intellectual work? I think they complement each other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/what-s-better-a-poetic-intuition-or-an-intellectual-work-i-think-they/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [Modern American cinema seems to me superficial. The intention is to understand a certain reality, and the result is nothing but a photographing of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/modern-american-cinema-seems-to-me-superficial-the-intention-is-to/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [Contrary to what Kafka does, I always like to refer all of my fictions to the level of reality, He, on the other hand,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/contrary-to-what-kafka-does-i-always-like-to-refer-all-of-my-fictions/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [I've always wondered why there isn't a great French novel about the German occupation. 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But sometimes the desire for more…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/i-do-believe-that-reading-can-help-you-understand-what-you-re-writing/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [Writers are not meant for action.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/writers-are-not-meant-for-action/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [I don't have traceable literary models because I haven't had great literary influences in my life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/i-don-t-have-traceable-literary-models-because-i-haven-t-had-great/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [For someone who writes fiction, in order to activate the imagination and the unconscious, it's essential to be free.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/for-someone-who-writes-fiction-in-order-to-activate-the-imagination/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [If a spectator with a philosophical mind, somebody accustomed to reading books, gets the same kind of information in a movie, he might not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/if-a-spectator-with-a-philosophical-mind-somebody-accustomed-to/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [What better model of a synthesis than a nocturnal dream? Dreams simplify, don't they?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/what-better-model-of-a-synthesis-than-a-nocturnal-dream-dreams/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [Hitchcock makes it very clear to us. There's an objective and a subjective camera, like there's a third- and a first-person narrator in literature.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/hitchcock-makes-it-very-clear-to-us-there-s-an-objective-and-a/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [Whenever I write, I'm always thinking of the reader.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/whenever-i-write-i-m-always-thinking-of-the-reader/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) > [I only understand realism.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/manuel-puig/i-only-understand-realism/) [Manuel Puig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) [Explore all 66 Manuel Puig quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/manuel-puig/) ## More Men quotes > [When I passed the Chancellor he arose, waved his hand at me, and I waved back at him. 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