--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Being with Ken was like being with a…" description: "\"“Being with Ken was like being with a permanently foreign friend. It was impossible to understand them, but all you really needed to do was reflect bac..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eeb/louise-penny-1059_foreigners_being-with-ken-was-like-being-with-a-per_1504342.png" --- # Being with Ken was like being with a permanently foreign… ![“Being with Ken was like being with a permanently foreign friend. It was impossible to understand them, but all you really needed to do was reflect back their own expressions. When Ken looked sad, they looked sad. When he looked happy, they smiled. It was actually very relaxing to be around him…” quote by Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eeb/louise-penny-1059_foreigners_being-with-ken-was-like-being-with-a-per_1504342.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eeb/louise-penny-1059_foreigners_being-with-ken-was-like-being-with-a-per_1504342.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eeb/louise-penny-1059_foreigners_being-with-ken-was-like-being-with-a-per_1504342.png) > ““Being with Ken was like being with a permanently foreign friend. It was impossible to understand them, but all you really needed to do was reflect back their own expressions. When Ken looked sad, they looked sad. When he looked happy, they smiled. It was actually very relaxing to be around him. Not much was expected.”” [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Understanding others can be achieved by mirroring their emotions, fostering calm and connection without deep analysis. **In simple terms:** Reflect others' feelings to connect. Key Takeaway Mirror emotions to build rapport. Themes empathy communication relationships Mood empathetic relaxed Type advice psychological When to use this quote - therapy sessions - team meetings - friendship building - conflict resolution Key Concepts psychology active listening Questions to Reflect On - When have you used mirroring successfully? - What risks arise from over‑mirroring? A Different Perspective Mirroring may feel inauthentic if not genuine. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Expressions Ken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/expressions-ken-5522374/) [Foreign Friend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/foreign-friend-5522375/) [Foreigners](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/foreigners/) [Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship/) [Ken Like](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ken-like-5522376/) [Ken Looked](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ken-looked-1104372/) [Looked Sad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/looked-sad-468838/) ## Related quotes > [“Ken appeared, was taller than she, wanted her, was acceptable and accepted on all sides; similarly, nagging mathematical problems abruptly crack open. Foxy could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-updike/ken-appeared-was-taller-than-she-wanted-her-was-acceptable-and/) [John Updike](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-updike/) > [“And, anyway, friendship is different in another language; a foreign friend doesn't have to understand what you feel, and I don't expect it. It's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-chabon/and-anyway-friendship-is-different-in-another-language-a-foreign/) [Michael Chabon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-chabon/) > [“The dogs looked sad as they were nudged from the back of the car. They were big, red brutes with kind eyes. Their ears…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-h-street/the-dogs-looked-sad-as-they-were-nudged-from-the-back-of-the-car-they/) [James H. Street](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-h-street/) > [“The ball was held in a middle-class home. The girls were anemic - some of them; the others were red as raspberries. John liked…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/august-strindberg/the-ball-was-held-in-a-middle-class-home-the-girls-were-anemic-some/) [August Strindberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/august-strindberg/) > [“You bought it though. You must think the worst of me.” He sighed softly and looked sad for half a second. “I’m not a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/s-c-stephens/you-bought-it-though-you-must-think-the-worst-of-me-he-sighed-softly/) [S.C. Stephens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/s-c-stephens/) > [You really love her don't you," she said. With all my heart." She looked as sad as I'd ever seen her. What's your heart…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicholas-sparks/you-really-love-her-don-t-you-she-said-with-all-my-heart-she-looked/) [Nicholas Sparks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicholas-sparks/) > [“His eyes looked sad, like the ocean before a big storm.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mette-jakobsen/his-eyes-looked-sad-like-the-ocean-before-a-big-storm/) [Mette Jakobsen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mette-jakobsen/) > [“The nights he would pick up someone always made him sad. It's hard, too, because Patrick began every night really excited. He always said…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-chbosky/the-nights-he-would-pick-up-someone-always-made-him-sad-it-s-hard-too/) [Stephen Chbosky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-chbosky/) > [“I never had trouble eating or sleeping when I thought of her in danger. I didn't want to tear my heart out when she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lili-st-crow/i-never-had-trouble-eating-or-sleeping-when-i-thought-of-her-in/) [Lili St. Crow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lili-st-crow/) > [deep down...she's a good woman...you should be proud of her." When I told my mom about this, she just looked very sad because he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-chbosky/deep-down-she-s-a-good-woman-you-should-be-proud-of-her-when-i-told/) [Stephen Chbosky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-chbosky/) > [I saw this girl today, she was beautiful in my eyes but she didnt smile at all. I asked her why she looked so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/levita-charin/i-saw-this-girl-today-she-was-beautiful-in-my-eyes-but-she-didnt/) [Levita Charin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/levita-charin/) > [This person had arrived, he had illuminated her, he had ensorcelled her with notions of miracle and beauty, he had both understood and misunderstood…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-gilbert/this-person-had-arrived-he-had-illuminated-her-he-had-ensorcelled-her/) [Elizabeth Gilbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-gilbert/) > [“She was never thought of as a pretty girl. People might say she looked interesting, mysterious, older than her years and therefore intriguing, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-walker/she-was-never-thought-of-as-a-pretty-girl-people-might-say-she-looked/) [Alice Walker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-walker/) > [One day he said, "I'll tell this town How it feels to be an unfunny clown." And he told them all why he looked…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shel-silverstein/one-day-he-said-i-ll-tell-this-town-how-it-feels-to-be-an-unfunny/) [Shel Silverstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shel-silverstein/) > [“I stumbled away. I pressed the back of my hand to my mouth and just looked at him. "What was that?" His chest rose…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-morgan/i-stumbled-away-i-pressed-the-back-of-my-hand-to-my-mouth-and-just/) [Elizabeth Morgan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-morgan/) ## More by Louise Penny > [“Whale oil beef hooked,”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/whale-oil-beef-hooked/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“I am tired,” Gamache murmured as he walked into the gentle little village. “But I am at peace.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/i-am-tired-gamache-murmured-as-he-walked-into-the-gentle-little/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“The reason “belonging” was so potent, so attractive, so much a part of the human yearning, was that it also meant safety, and loyalty.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/the-reason-belonging-was-so-potent-so-attractive-so-much-a-part-of/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“She picked up her book and tried to read but it was heavy in her hands. She struggled to hold it, wanting to finish…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/she-picked-up-her-book-and-tried-to-read-but-it-was-heavy-in-her/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“We’re used to the film versions of psychopaths. The clearly crazies. But most psychopaths are clever. They have to be. They know how to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/we-re-used-to-the-film-versions-of-psychopaths-the-clearly-crazies/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“Instead he stood erect, the snow insinuating itself down his collar and up his sleeves, plastering against his face and into his unblinking eyes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/instead-he-stood-erect-the-snow-insinuating-itself-down-his-collar/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“He was an emotional communist. Everyone counted equally, but none too much.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/he-was-an-emotional-communist-everyone-counted-equally-but-none-too/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [I turned down all the requests for the rights to the books, for years, mostly because they wanted the rights to the characters, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/i-turned-down-all-the-requests-for-the-rights-to-the-books-for-years/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“Chief Superintendent Arnot might hold power, but Armand Gamache was the more powerful man.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/chief-superintendent-arnot-might-hold-power-but-armand-gamache-was/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“Henri kept everything important in his heart. He mostly kept cookies in his head.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/henri-kept-everything-important-in-his-heart-he-mostly-kept-cookies/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [A good journalist, as you know, is a great listener. And so's a good writer. And I got to listen to people for almost…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/a-good-journalist-as-you-know-is-a-great-listener-and-so-s-a-good/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [The question that haunted every investigation was 'why'.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/the-question-that-haunted-every-investigation-was-why/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [But, like peace, comfort didn't come from hiding away or running away. Comfort first demanded courage.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/but-like-peace-comfort-didn-t-come-from-hiding-away-or-running-away/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“He did not suggest that she sit quietly and get to know herself so she could be all the company she needed.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/he-did-not-suggest-that-she-sit-quietly-and-get-to-know-herself-so/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) > [“Come hither, all ye empty things,/Ye bubbles raised by breath of kings;/Who float upon the tide of state,/Come hither, and behold your fate.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-penny/come-hither-all-ye-empty-things-ye-bubbles-raised-by-breath-of-kings/) [Louise Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) [Explore all 295 Louise Penny quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-penny/) ## More Foreigners quotes > [Americans are very friendly and very suspicious, that is what Americans are and that is what always upsets the foreigner, who deals with them,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gertrude-stein/americans-are-very-friendly-and-very-suspicious-that-is-what/) [Gertrude Stein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gertrude-stein/) > [Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-orben/do-you-realize-that-in-the-past-sixty-years-the-only-foreigners-the/) [Robert Orben](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-orben/) > [“I don't want foreigners involved in my business. Jinn are one thing but I draw the line at Americans.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/g-willow-wilson/i-don-t-want-foreigners-involved-in-my-business-jinn-are-one-thing/) [G. Willow Wilson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/g-willow-wilson/) > [Nearly all the Gauls are of a lofty stature, white, and of ruddy complexion; terrible from the sternness of their eyes, very quarrelsome, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ammianus-marcellinus/nearly-all-the-gauls-are-of-a-lofty-stature-white-and-of-ruddy/) [Ammianus Marcellinus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ammianus-marcellinus/) > [I'm getting less good at faking it. People in my family are noticing and asking what's wrong. My friends give me invitations to talk,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martha-manning/i-m-getting-less-good-at-faking-it-people-in-my-family-are-noticing/) [Martha Manning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martha-manning/) > [Faith, faith, faith in ourselves, faith, faith in God, this is the secret of greatness.If you have faith in all the three hundred and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/swami-vivekananda/faith-faith-faith-in-ourselves-faith-faith-in-god-this-is-the-secret/) [Swami Vivekananda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/swami-vivekananda/) > [Half of the time I don't know what they're talking about; their jokes seem to relate to a past that everyone but me has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-webster/half-of-the-time-i-don-t-know-what-they-re-talking-about-their-jokes/) [Jean Webster](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-webster/) > [If he were allowed contact with foreigners he would discover that they are creatures similar to himself and that most of what he has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-orwell/if-he-were-allowed-contact-with-foreigners-he-would-discover-that/) [George Orwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-orwell/) > [People love to hear the brag of the local boy, because they want him to be great, but the foreigner must deny that he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/orson-scott-card/people-love-to-hear-the-brag-of-the-local-boy-because-they-want-him/) [Orson Scott Card](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/orson-scott-card/) > [“Tapi yang menyenangkan dalam sebuah perjalanan adalah menemukan diri kita sendiri; sebuah rumah yang sesungguhnya. Yang membuat kita tak akan merasa asing meski berada…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/windy-ariestanty/tapi-yang-menyenangkan-dalam-sebuah-perjalanan-adalah-menemukan-diri/) [Windy Ariestanty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/windy-ariestanty/) > [I first went to Barcelona in 1975 after university, and I stayed for three years. I learnt Catalan because that's what everyone speaks in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colm-toibin/i-first-went-to-barcelona-in-1975-after-university-and-i-stayed-for/) [Colm Toibin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colm-toibin/) > [We of alien looks or words must stick together.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/c-j-sansom/we-of-alien-looks-or-words-must-stick-together/) [C.J. Sansom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/c-j-sansom/) > [A foreigner is an individual who is considered either comic or sinister. When the victim of a disaster - preferably natural but sometimes political…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ralston-saul/a-foreigner-is-an-individual-who-is-considered-either-comic-or/) [John Ralston Saul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ralston-saul/) > [I agree with you, Mr. Chairman, that the working men are the basis of all governments, for the plain reason that they are the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abraham-lincoln/i-agree-with-you-mr-chairman-that-the-working-men-are-the-basis-of/) [Abraham Lincoln](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abraham-lincoln/) > [Modern man is educated to understand foreign languages and misunderstand foreigners.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gilbert-k-chesterton/modern-man-is-educated-to-understand-foreign-languages-and/) [Gilbert K. Chesterton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gilbert-k-chesterton/) [Browse all 430 Foreigners quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/foreigners/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Being with Ken was like being with a permanently foreign friend. It was impossible to understand them, but all you really needed to do was reflect back their own expressions. When Ken looked sad, they looked sad. When he looked happy, they smiled. It was actually very relaxing to be around him. 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