---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But why shouldn't I thank someone for…"
description: "\"“But why shouldn't I thank someone for doing me a service?\" he heard Lillian ask with genuine perplexity. \"It's polite to say thank you, isn't it?\" \"Yo..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a49/lisa-kleypas-111_back-talk_but-why-shouldn-t-i-thank-someone-for-do_2538881.jpg"
---

#  But why shouldn't I thank someone for doing me a service?"…

![“But why shouldn't I thank someone for doing me a service?&quot; he heard Lillian ask with genuine perplexity. &quot;It's polite to say thank you, isn't it?&quot; &quot;You should no more thank a servant than you would think a horse for allowing you to ride it, or a table for bearing the dishes you place upon it.&quot;…” quote by Lisa Kleypas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a49/lisa-kleypas-111_back-talk_but-why-shouldn-t-i-thank-someone-for-do_2538881.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a49/lisa-kleypas-111_back-talk_but-why-shouldn-t-i-thank-someone-for-do_2538881.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a49/lisa-kleypas-111_back-talk_but-why-shouldn-t-i-thank-someone-for-do_2538881.jpg)

> ““But why shouldn't I thank someone for doing me a service?" he heard Lillian ask with genuine perplexity. "It's polite to say thank you, isn't it?" "You should no more thank a servant than you would think a horse for allowing you to ride it, or a table for bearing the dishes you place upon it." "Well, we're not discussing animals or inanimate objects, are we? A footman is a person." "No," the countess said coldly. "A footman is a servant." "And a servant is a person," Lillian said stubbornly. The elderly woman sighed in exasperation. "Whatever your view of a footman is, you must not thank him at dinner. Servants neither expect nor desire such condescension, and if you insist on putting them in the awkward position of having to respond to your remarks, they will think badly of you... as will everyone else. Do not insult me with that vapid stare, Miss Bowman! You come from a family of means- surely you employed servants at your New York residence!" "Yes," Lillian acknowledged pertly, "but we talked to ours.””

[Lisa Kleypas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-kleypas/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Thanking a servant as if they were an object reduces their humanity; respect requires acknowledging their personhood without patronizing gestures.

**In simple terms:** Treat servants as people, not objects.

Key Takeaway

Show respect through genuine appreciation, not condescension.

Themes

respect class humanity etiquette

Mood

thoughtful critical

Type

social ethical

When to use this quote

- dinner parties
- employment relationships
- social gatherings

Key Concepts

social hierarchy power dynamics language

Questions to Reflect On

- How do you balance politeness with dignity?
- When is gratitude appropriate?

A Different Perspective

May ignore cultural norms where gratitude is expected.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Lillian-bowman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lillian-bowman/)

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