--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: We are not attracted to people because…" description: "\"We are not attracted to people because they are virtuous. In fact, there's something a little creepy about people who are too good. There is a big draw..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abe/lionel-shriver-744_admiring_we-are-not-attracted-to-people-because-t_2326493.jpg" --- # We are not attracted to people because they are virtuous… ![“We are not attracted to people because they are virtuous. In fact, there's something a little creepy about people who are too good. There is a big draw to people who are successful at breaking the rules. That means we end up admiring a lot of people that we think we shouldn't.” quote by Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abe/lionel-shriver-744_admiring_we-are-not-attracted-to-people-because-t_2326493.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abe/lionel-shriver-744_admiring_we-are-not-attracted-to-people-because-t_2326493.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abe/lionel-shriver-744_admiring_we-are-not-attracted-to-people-because-t_2326493.jpg) > “We are not attracted to people because they are virtuous. In fact, there's something a little creepy about people who are too good. There is a big draw to people who are successful at breaking the rules. That means we end up admiring a lot of people that we think we shouldn't.” [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. People are drawn to rule‑breakers because they embody excitement and rebellion, while virtue can seem dull or threatening. **In simple terms:** We often admire those who defy norms more than the virtuous. Key Takeaway Recognize the appeal of rebellion but value integrity. Themes desire virtue rebellion psychology attraction Mood cynical analytical Type philosophical observational When to use this quote - media consumption - dating - career advancement - friendship circles Key Concepts moral ambiguity social dynamics celebrity culture Questions to Reflect On - Why do we romanticize rebels? - Can virtue be presented more compellingly? A Different Perspective Admiration of rule‑breakers can overlook harmful consequences. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Admiring](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/admiring/) [Attracted](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/attracted/) [Attracted People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/attracted-people/) [Bigs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bigs/) [Breaking the rules](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/breaking-the-rules/) [Creepy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/creepy/) [Draws](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/draws/) [Ends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ends/) [Facts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/facts/) [Littles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/littles/) [Mean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mean/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [People Good](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people-good/) [People Think](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people-think/) [People Virtuous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people-virtuous-1285011/) [Successful](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/successful/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) [Virtuous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/virtuous/) ## Related quotes > [“They stole from rich merchants and temples and kings. They didn't steal from poor people; this was not because there was anything virtuous about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-pratchett/they-stole-from-rich-merchants-and-temples-and-kings-they-didn-t/) [Terry Pratchett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-pratchett/) > [Shaming people into being virtuous doesn't change behaviour.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jaan-tallinn/shaming-people-into-being-virtuous-doesn-t-change-behaviour/) [Jaan Tallinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jaan-tallinn/) > [Il n'y a que deux sortes d'hommes: les uns justes, qui se croient pe cheurs; les autres pe cheurs, qui se croient justes. There…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/blaise-pascal/il-n-y-a-que-deux-sortes-d-hommes-les-uns-justes-qui-se-croient-pe/) [Blaise Pascal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/blaise-pascal/) > [There are people who are virtuous only in a piece-meal way; virtue is a fabric from which they never make themselves a whole garment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-joubert/there-are-people-who-are-virtuous-only-in-a-piece-meal-way-virtue-is/) [Joseph Joubert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-joubert/) > [Such attributes as virtue or intelligence aren't additive. It's absurd to maintain that two evil people can somehow be more virtuous than one decent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/l-neil-smith-2/such-attributes-as-virtue-or-intelligence-aren-t-additive-it-s-absurd/) [L Neil Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/l-neil-smith-2/) > [“These were good people and they had been good to us and we had therefore had a good time. To conclude otherwise was frightening,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/these-were-good-people-and-they-had-been-good-to-us-and-we-had/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“Franklin would find himself more attracted to people who were practical and reliable rather than dreamy and romantic.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walter-isaacson/franklin-would-find-himself-more-attracted-to-people-who-were/) [Walter Isaacson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walter-isaacson/) > [I guess I've always been attracted to people who stand out as individuals - people who are adventurous and take chances.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carmen-electra/i-guess-i-ve-always-been-attracted-to-people-who-stand-out-as/) [Carmen Electra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carmen-electra/) > [That's what I'm attracted to: how people face struggle - with humor - and how they handle tough situations in their lives and in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-o-malley/that-s-what-i-m-attracted-to-how-people-face-struggle-with-humor-and/) [Mike O'Malley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-o-malley/) > [You always feel more attracted to people who play the way you play.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-silva/you-always-feel-more-attracted-to-people-who-play-the-way-you-play/) [David Silva](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-silva/) > [I guess I'm attracted to people who are singing about love or life, and they have a particular passion that I can connect with.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/langhorne-slim/i-guess-i-m-attracted-to-people-who-are-singing-about-love-or-life-2/) [Langhorne Slim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/langhorne-slim/) > [I realize I love crazy ladies. Of course I don't like to think of myself as one, but maybe I am, too. I dunno.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michaela-watkins/i-realize-i-love-crazy-ladies-of-course-i-don-t-like-to-think-of/) [Michaela Watkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michaela-watkins/) > [We are attracted to people who have traits we want in ourselves, and usually we are unattracted to people with traits that we share.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/we-are-attracted-to-people-who-have-traits-we-want-in-ourselves-and/) [Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/) > [I guess I'm attracted to people who are singing about love or life, and they have a particular passion that I can connect with.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/langhorne-slim/i-guess-i-m-attracted-to-people-who-are-singing-about-love-or-life/) [Langhorne Slim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/langhorne-slim/) > [I still get attracted to people but having a relationship isn't fair on the other person.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-hegerty/i-still-get-attracted-to-people-but-having-a-relationship-isn-t-fair/) [Anne Hegerty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-hegerty/) ## More by Lionel Shriver > [The discovery that heartbreak is indeed heartbreaking consoles us about our humanity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-discovery-that-heartbreak-is-indeed-heartbreaking-consoles-us/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I’m a journalist, and journalists need news. Deprive them of it, and they go a bit barking. Deprive them of news long enough, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-m-a-journalist-and-journalists-need-news-deprive-them-of-it-and/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“One of the things I learned with Charles," said Gray carefully, "was that finding someone like you does not necessarily mean that either of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/one-of-the-things-i-learned-with-charles-said-gray-carefully-was-that/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [In the particular dwells the tawdry. In the conceptual dwells the grand, the transcendent, the everlasting. Earthly countries and single malignant boys can go…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/in-the-particular-dwells-the-tawdry-in-the-conceptual-dwells-the/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“The idea is that you don't only have one destiny. Younger and younger, kids are pressed to decide what they want to do with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-idea-is-that-you-don-t-only-have-one-destiny-younger-and-younger/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [Oddly, for a book to do well merely because people like it is surprisingly rare.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/oddly-for-a-book-to-do-well-merely-because-people-like-it-is/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“And there's a freedom in apathy, a wild, dizzying liberation on which you can almost get drunk.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/and-there-s-a-freedom-in-apathy-a-wild-dizzying-liberation-on-which/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [The sign that I don't like the book I'm reading is finding myself watching reruns of 'Come Dine With Me.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-sign-that-i-don-t-like-the-book-i-m-reading-is-finding-myself/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [We speak often of 'destroying the planet' when what we mean is destroying its habitability for humans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/we-speak-often-of-destroying-the-planet-when-what-we-mean-is/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [My agent had warned that, while a fine film would do my profile a world of good, a bad one wouldn't help me at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/my-agent-had-warned-that-while-a-fine-film-would-do-my-profile-a/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I think that's the biggest favor you can grant anyone, don't you? Permission to be dull. I know Henry will sometimes say something so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-think-that-s-the-biggest-favor-you-can-grant-anyone-don-t-you/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“They were determined to find something mechanically wrong with him - because broken machines are easier to fix. p303”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/they-were-determined-to-find-something-mechanically-wrong-with-him/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“Bur Armenians have a talent for sorrow.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/bur-armenians-have-a-talent-for-sorrow/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“What is cool changes; that there is such a thing as cool is immutable.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/what-is-cool-changes-that-there-is-such-a-thing-as-cool-is-immutable/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I have theorized that you can locate most people on a spectrum of the crudest sort and that it may be their position on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-have-theorized-that-you-can-locate-most-people-on-a-spectrum-of-the/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) [Explore all 375 Lionel Shriver quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) ## More Admiring quotes > [The hidden child wants to be able to participate and to co-create in art, rather than being simply an admiring viewer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christian-morgenstern/the-hidden-child-wants-to-be-able-to-participate-and-to-co-create-in/) [Christian Morgenstern](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christian-morgenstern/) > [Hillary Clinton was in rural America during the Iowa caucuses, but I think the nature of a campaign makes it more difficult once you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-vilsack/hillary-clinton-was-in-rural-america-during-the-iowa-caucuses-but-i/) [Tom Vilsack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-vilsack/) > [“Start admiring and noticing your beautiful nature, body, talents, and intelligence.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-vickers/start-admiring-and-noticing-your-beautiful-nature-body-talents-and/) [Lee Vickers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lee-vickers/) > [The Bible is to us what the star was to the wise men; but if we spend all our time in gazing upon it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-adams/the-bible-is-to-us-what-the-star-was-to-the-wise-men-but-if-we-spend/) [Thomas Adams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-adams/) > [There never was a liar that had not a spot in him where he could not help admiring truth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ward-beecher/there-never-was-a-liar-that-had-not-a-spot-in-him-where-he-could-not/) [Henry Ward Beecher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ward-beecher/) > [I've grown up watching and admiring Norm. Sherie actually starred in the first off-Broadway show I ever saw in New York, which was The…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tituss-burgess/i-ve-grown-up-watching-and-admiring-norm-sherie-actually-starred-in/) [Tituss Burgess](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tituss-burgess/) > [“Miles couldn't help admiring women for their ability to dismiss the evidence of their senses. If that's what explained it. If it wasn't simply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-russo/miles-couldn-t-help-admiring-women-for-their-ability-to-dismiss-the/) [Richard Russo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-russo/) > [If I ever let my head fall.. I promise , I would be simply admiring my shoes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mercy-pheona/if-i-ever-let-my-head-fall-i-promise-i-would-be-simply-admiring-my/) [Mercy Pheona](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mercy-pheona/) > [I take all day to climb mountains and then spend about 10 minutes at the top admiring the view.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sebastian-thrun/i-take-all-day-to-climb-mountains-and-then-spend-about-10-minutes-at/) [Sebastian Thrun](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sebastian-thrun/) > [Great geniuses have the shortest biographies. Their cousins can tell you nothing about them. They lived in their writings, and sotheir house and street…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ralph-waldo-emerson/great-geniuses-have-the-shortest-biographies-their-cousins-can-tell/) [Ralph Waldo Emerson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ralph-waldo-emerson/) > [Because I'm a musician aspiring to write good stuff and put on good shows, I'm hyperaware of what they're doing and what they're putting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-harmer/because-i-m-a-musician-aspiring-to-write-good-stuff-and-put-on-good/) [Sarah Harmer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-harmer/) > [Juan gave Bones the most admiring look he’d bestowed on him yet. “You talked her into going without panties all these years? Madre de…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/juan-gave-bones-the-most-admiring-look-he-d-bestowed-on-him-yet-you/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [I've been an admirer of Helen Mirren for a long time. As I get older, I find myself admiring older women who have poise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-haden-church/i-ve-been-an-admirer-of-helen-mirren-for-a-long-time-as-i-get-older-i/) [Thomas Haden Church](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-haden-church/) > [You grow up watching certain films or admiring certain filmmakers, and to write a love letter to one and have them validate it, it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simon-pegg/you-grow-up-watching-certain-films-or-admiring-certain-filmmakers-and/) [Simon Pegg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simon-pegg/) > [In the candle's flickering light, the library's thousands of books emerged from the shadows, and for a moment Nicholas could not help admiring them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trenton-lee-stewart/in-the-candle-s-flickering-light-the-library-s-thousands-of-books/) [Trenton Lee Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trenton-lee-stewart/) [Browse all 177 Admiring quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/admiring/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We are not attracted to people because they are virtuous. 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