--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: ...it's not all it's cracked up to be…" description: "\"“...it's not all it's cracked up to be, having real emotions. I know that with the most dazzling men there have been times I've been terribly bored and..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cd/lionel-shriver-744_hardest-thing_it-s-not-all-it-s-cracked-up-to-be-havin_2196822.jpg" --- # ...it's not all it's cracked up to be, having real… ![“...it's not all it's cracked up to be, having real emotions. I know that with the most dazzling men there have been times I've been terribly bored and I am sure they've been equally bored with me. Then much of life is indeed boring, and that's nobody's fault…Myself, I've been in the very arms of a…” quote by Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cd/lionel-shriver-744_hardest-thing_it-s-not-all-it-s-cracked-up-to-be-havin_2196822.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cd/lionel-shriver-744_hardest-thing_it-s-not-all-it-s-cracked-up-to-be-havin_2196822.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cd/lionel-shriver-744_hardest-thing_it-s-not-all-it-s-cracked-up-to-be-havin_2196822.jpg) > ““...it's not all it's cracked up to be, having real emotions. I know that with the most dazzling men there have been times I've been terribly bored and I am sure they've been equally bored with me. Then much of life is indeed boring, and that's nobody's fault…Myself, I've been in the very arms of a beloved and felt nothing, when the only choice was whether to admit I felt nothing or to lie. The hardest thing about loving someone is those moments when you're not. And there are inevitablty such moments; the amount of trust required to get past them is stupendous.”” [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Love can be empty, and trusting through those voids demands immense courage. **In simple terms:** Love may feel empty; trust is essential. Key Takeaway Cultivate honesty and patience in relationships. Themes love trust emptiness relationships Mood reflective melancholic hopeful Type philosophical emotional When to use this quote - romantic partnership - long‑term marriage - friendship - therapy sessions Key Concepts emotional intimacy psychological resilience attachment theory Questions to Reflect On - How do you recognize genuine affection versus habit? - What steps build trust after feeling empty? A Different Perspective Even with trust, emotional gaps can persist and cause pain. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Admit Felt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/admit-felt-1544828/) [Emotions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotions/) [Emotions Know](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotions-know-509110/) [Hardest thing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hardest-thing/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Loving Moments](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loving-moments-4808743/) [Real Emotions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/real-emotions-495165/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) ## Related quotes > [“I was just waiting for you to want me as much as I wanted you.” His words were quiet but carried one hell of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kimberly-derting/i-was-just-waiting-for-you-to-want-me-as-much-as-i-wanted-you-his/) [Kimberly Derting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kimberly-derting/) > [“I will admit it sometimes felt strange to me to make the confession to someone and later catch them laughing, or flirting, or eating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-dubois/i-will-admit-it-sometimes-felt-strange-to-me-to-make-the-confession/) [Jennifer Dubois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-dubois/) > [“Though he wouldn't dare admit that he might have felt more for her. He wasn't ready to care for a person that much when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shawn-kirsten-maravel/though-he-wouldn-t-dare-admit-that-he-might-have-felt-more-for-her-he/) [Shawn Kirsten Maravel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shawn-kirsten-maravel/) > [This is about real emotions. This is about me, loving you, for real. And not in a just to make me come kinda way,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-mcbride/this-is-about-real-emotions-this-is-about-me-loving-you-for-real-and/) [Danny Mcbride](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danny-mcbride/) > [Uttaran' works because it has real emotions and situations. Of course, some drama is essential in a television show, but people connect to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rashami-desai/uttaran-works-because-it-has-real-emotions-and-situations-of-course/) [Rashami Desai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rashami-desai/) > [Horror movies can be - I don't wanna say not real, but so over-the-top: you can get scared 'cos things are loud and in-your-face,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maika-monroe/horror-movies-can-be-i-don-t-wanna-say-not-real-but-so-over-the-top/) [Maika Monroe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maika-monroe/) > [I get the best inspiration or the most creativity from real emotions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sam-hunt/i-get-the-best-inspiration-or-the-most-creativity-from-real-emotions/) [Sam Hunt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sam-hunt/) > [Although it's not useful to drown in despair, it's also not useful to keep a 'positive attitude' when this means concealing or denying real…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harriet-lerner/although-it-s-not-useful-to-drown-in-despair-it-s-also-not-useful-to/) [Harriet Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harriet-lerner/) > [When you're actually feeling a character and you're going through the real emotions, and you're not fake acting, that energy stays with you and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tinsel-korey/when-you-re-actually-feeling-a-character-and-you-re-going-through-the/) [Tinsel Korey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tinsel-korey/) > [We're in the business of using real emotions to bring pretend emotions to life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-lithgow/we-re-in-the-business-of-using-real-emotions-to-bring-pretend/) [John Lithgow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-lithgow/) > [You made me feel real emotions. You unlocked me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-a-redmerski/you-made-me-feel-real-emotions-you-unlocked-me/) [J.A. Redmerski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-a-redmerski/) > [So many of my songs are based on things that either happened to me or to someone I know, but there are also ones…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shawn-mendes/so-many-of-my-songs-are-based-on-things-that-either-happened-to-me-or/) [Shawn Mendes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shawn-mendes/) > [I just like to be real and just express real emotions and talk about real life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trisha-paytas/i-just-like-to-be-real-and-just-express-real-emotions-and-talk-about/) [Trisha Paytas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trisha-paytas/) > [“What is terrible is that after every one of the phases of my life is finished, I am left with no more than some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-lessing/what-is-terrible-is-that-after-every-one-of-the-phases-of-my-life-is/) [Doris Lessing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-lessing/) > [I guess the most amazing thing about crying though is that when you're in it, you think it'll go on forever but it never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-goldman/i-guess-the-most-amazing-thing-about-crying-though-is-that-when-you/) [William Goldman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-goldman/) ## More by Lionel Shriver > [The discovery that heartbreak is indeed heartbreaking consoles us about our humanity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-discovery-that-heartbreak-is-indeed-heartbreaking-consoles-us/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I’m a journalist, and journalists need news. Deprive them of it, and they go a bit barking. Deprive them of news long enough, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-m-a-journalist-and-journalists-need-news-deprive-them-of-it-and/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“One of the things I learned with Charles," said Gray carefully, "was that finding someone like you does not necessarily mean that either of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/one-of-the-things-i-learned-with-charles-said-gray-carefully-was-that/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [In the particular dwells the tawdry. In the conceptual dwells the grand, the transcendent, the everlasting. Earthly countries and single malignant boys can go…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/in-the-particular-dwells-the-tawdry-in-the-conceptual-dwells-the/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“The idea is that you don't only have one destiny. Younger and younger, kids are pressed to decide what they want to do with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-idea-is-that-you-don-t-only-have-one-destiny-younger-and-younger/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [Oddly, for a book to do well merely because people like it is surprisingly rare.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/oddly-for-a-book-to-do-well-merely-because-people-like-it-is/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“And there's a freedom in apathy, a wild, dizzying liberation on which you can almost get drunk.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/and-there-s-a-freedom-in-apathy-a-wild-dizzying-liberation-on-which/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [The sign that I don't like the book I'm reading is finding myself watching reruns of 'Come Dine With Me.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/the-sign-that-i-don-t-like-the-book-i-m-reading-is-finding-myself/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [We speak often of 'destroying the planet' when what we mean is destroying its habitability for humans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/we-speak-often-of-destroying-the-planet-when-what-we-mean-is/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [My agent had warned that, while a fine film would do my profile a world of good, a bad one wouldn't help me at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/my-agent-had-warned-that-while-a-fine-film-would-do-my-profile-a/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I think that's the biggest favor you can grant anyone, don't you? Permission to be dull. I know Henry will sometimes say something so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-think-that-s-the-biggest-favor-you-can-grant-anyone-don-t-you/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“They were determined to find something mechanically wrong with him - because broken machines are easier to fix. p303”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/they-were-determined-to-find-something-mechanically-wrong-with-him/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“Bur Armenians have a talent for sorrow.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/bur-armenians-have-a-talent-for-sorrow/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“What is cool changes; that there is such a thing as cool is immutable.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/what-is-cool-changes-that-there-is-such-a-thing-as-cool-is-immutable/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“I have theorized that you can locate most people on a spectrum of the crudest sort and that it may be their position on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/i-have-theorized-that-you-can-locate-most-people-on-a-spectrum-of-the/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) [Explore all 375 Lionel Shriver quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) ## More Emotions quotes > [William Maxwell's my favorite North American writer, I think. And an Irish writer who used to write for 'The New Yorker' called Maeve Brennan,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-munro/william-maxwell-s-my-favorite-north-american-writer-i-think-and-an/) [Alice Munro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-munro/) > [On stage, you can bring all those strong emotions that you don't have the opportunity to live. You don't want to die for love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvie-guillem/on-stage-you-can-bring-all-those-strong-emotions-that-you-don-t-have/) [Sylvie Guillem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvie-guillem/) > [You will never fully understand how much you mean to me, because there are no amount of words that can begin to describe my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-will-never-fully-understand-how-much-you-mean-to-me-because-there/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Of course I like you. It's because I like you I don't wanna be with you. It's a complicated emotion.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marlin/of-course-i-like-you-it-s-because-i-like-you-i-don-t-wanna-be-with/) [Marlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marlin/) > [In discovering books, you became free to explore the full range of human motives, desires, secrets, and lies. All my life, people have scolded…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/betsy-lerner/in-discovering-books-you-became-free-to-explore-the-full-range-of/) [Betsy Lerner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/betsy-lerner/) > [What we're supposed to do as actors is be able to portray real human beings and emotions. And if you grow up in this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-browning/what-we-re-supposed-to-do-as-actors-is-be-able-to-portray-real-human/) [Emily Browning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-browning/) > [It definitely helps to have the acting experience going into singing, because when you're singing, you have to portray the emotion you were feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ryan-newman/it-definitely-helps-to-have-the-acting-experience-going-into-singing/) [Ryan Newman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ryan-newman/) > [Instead of asking a girl how she feels, try looking through her recently listened to songs. The lyrics are the answer to all your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/instead-of-asking-a-girl-how-she-feels-try-looking-through-her/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [My mind has trouble processing all the emotions I feel.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/my-mind-has-trouble-processing-all-the-emotions-i-feel/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Its a lack of clarity that creates chaos and frustration. Those emotions are poison to any living goal.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-maraboli/its-a-lack-of-clarity-that-creates-chaos-and-frustration-those/) [Steve Maraboli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-maraboli/) > [For war to man, like childbirth to women, is simplifying in its emotions and activities. All the real problems of life can be put…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pearl-s-buck/for-war-to-man-like-childbirth-to-women-is-simplifying-in-its/) [Pearl S. Buck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pearl-s-buck/) > [“When love carries us away on its brittle wings, we are too intoxicated to comprehend its power. We just want to soar and feel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/balroop-singh/when-love-carries-us-away-on-its-brittle-wings-we-are-too-intoxicated/) [Balroop Singh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/balroop-singh/) > [God, help me to focus on Truth instead of the trial. Help me to give thanks instead of giving into fear. Help me to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/whitney-daugherty/god-help-me-to-focus-on-truth-instead-of-the-trial-help-me-to-give/) [Whitney Daugherty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/whitney-daugherty/) > [Love is an ocean of emotions entirely sorrounded by expensee..](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/love-is-an-ocean-of-emotions-entirely-sorrounded-by-expensee/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I grew up in a blue-collar neighborhood and was raised by a man who did not emote, ever... I always cry at movies, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matthew-quick/i-grew-up-in-a-blue-collar-neighborhood-and-was-raised-by-a-man-who/) [Matthew Quick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matthew-quick/) [Browse all 4,415 Emotions quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotions/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“...it's not all it's cracked up to be, having real emotions. 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