--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: When you get into a fight with your…" description: "\"When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend, you usually have some weird, specific thing that you hold on to that you fight about that has ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg" --- # When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend… ![“When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend, you usually have some weird, specific thing that you hold on to that you fight about that has nothing to do with what's going on.” quote by Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg) > “When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend, you usually have some weird, specific thing that you hold on to that you fight about that has nothing to do with what's going on.” [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Conflicts often focus on trivial details that distract from the real issue, revealing underlying tensions **In simple terms:** Fights fixate on minor points, missing the core issue Key Takeaway Identify the real issue before arguing Themes communication conflict detail Mood frustrated analytical Type interpersonal advice When to use this quote - marriage counseling - friendship disputes - team meetings - negotiations Key Concepts Psychology miscommunication relationship dynamics Questions to Reflect On - What core issue lies beneath your argument? - How can you steer discussions to main concerns? A Different Perspective Minor points can obscure true problems ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [About](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/about/) [Fight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fight/) [Fight Partner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fight-partner-1123398/) [Friend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friend/) [Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship/) [Get](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/get/) [Going](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/going/) [Hold](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hold/) [Hold Fight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hold-fight-1090568/) [Nothing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nothing/) [Partner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/partner/) [Partner Friend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/partner-friend-1123400/) [Relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationship/) [Some](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/some/) [Specific](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/specific/) [Thing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thing/) [Usually Weird](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/usually-weird-1123401/) [Weird](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/weird/) [Weird Specific](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/weird-specific-1123399/) [You](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/you/) [Your](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/your/) ## Related quotes > [Everyone has marital problems. You know, you fight with your partner.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tori-spelling/everyone-has-marital-problems-you-know-you-fight-with-your-partner/) [Tori Spelling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tori-spelling/) > [Well, I knew instantly when I met my wife what a good relationship it was, compared with what I had been doing for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greg-behrendt/well-i-knew-instantly-when-i-met-my-wife-what-a-good-relationship-it/) [Greg Behrendt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greg-behrendt/) > [Earlier today I shot my old partner, a friend of mine, because he tried to stop me from doing what I have to do.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-bauer/earlier-today-i-shot-my-old-partner-a-friend-of-mine-because-he-tried/) [Jack Bauer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-bauer/) > [I had the good fortune to call George Steinbrenner both partner and friend.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-w-henry/i-had-the-good-fortune-to-call-george-steinbrenner-both-partner-and/) [John W. Henry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-w-henry/) > [Wishing a Happy Valentines Day to the best partner, friend and lover in the world!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/wishing-a-happy-valentines-day-to-the-best-partner-friend-and-lover/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Change is never easy you fight to hold on and fight to let go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tamika-leeigh/change-is-never-easy-you-fight-to-hold-on-and-fight-to-let-go/) [Tamika-leeigh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tamika-leeigh/) > [I know that the whole point—the only point—is to find the things that matter, and hold on to them, and fight for them, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-oliver/i-know-that-the-whole-point-the-only-point-is-to-find-the-things-that/) [Lauren Oliver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-oliver/) > [Change is never easy. You fight to hold on. You fight to let go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/change-is-never-easy-you-fight-to-hold-on-you-fight-to-let-go/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Moving on is never easy. You fight to hold on. You fight to let go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cherry-forever/moving-on-is-never-easy-you-fight-to-hold-on-you-fight-to-let-go/) [Cherry Forever](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cherry-forever/) > [Change is never easy, you fight to hold on, and you fight to let go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hiro-mashima/change-is-never-easy-you-fight-to-hold-on-and-you-fight-to-let-go/) [Hiro Mashima](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hiro-mashima/) > [“Find the things that matter, and hold on to them, and fight for them, and refuse to let them go.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-oliver/find-the-things-that-matter-and-hold-on-to-them-and-fight-for-them/) [Lauren Oliver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-oliver/) > [Change is hard; you fight to hold on, yet you fight to let go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/change-is-hard-you-fight-to-hold-on-yet-you-fight-to-let-go/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I don't know what it is about me that gets cast in specific roles. Some people would say, 'You're just a pretty face,' but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/grace-park/i-don-t-know-what-it-is-about-me-that-gets-cast-in-specific-roles/) [Grace Park](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/grace-park/) > [Most of the more celebrated names among African-American authors, poets, and artists are known to the world because of their association with specific cultural…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aberjhani/most-of-the-more-celebrated-names-among-african-american-authors/) [Aberjhani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aberjhani/) > [When scientists are asked what they are working on, their response is seldom 'Finding the origin of the universe' or 'Seeking to cure cancer.'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-rees/when-scientists-are-asked-what-they-are-working-on-their-response-is/) [Martin Rees](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-rees/) ## More by Lennon Parham > [I can eat Chipotle all day long for years.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/i-can-eat-chipotle-all-day-long-for-years/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [In the summer of 2012 - and we do as we do when we get together to brainstorm an idea - we were both…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/in-the-summer-of-2012-and-we-do-as-we-do-when-we-get-together-to/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [I know the words to, like, every song. Hoobastank, whatever.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/i-know-the-words-to-like-every-song-hoobastank-whatever/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [The ones that I love of 'I Love Lucy' are when one of them decides they need something, and the other one is along…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/the-ones-that-i-love-of-i-love-lucy-are-when-one-of-them-decides-they/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > ['Playing House' works because we're being supremely honest to what we think is funny and not what we think other people think is funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/playing-house-works-because-we-re-being-supremely-honest-to-what-we/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [Right after you have a baby, the focus is on the baby. You don't feel sexual; you don't feel attractive; and you have a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/right-after-you-have-a-baby-the-focus-is-on-the-baby-you-don-t-feel/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [My favorite dessert is banana pudding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/my-favorite-dessert-is-banana-pudding/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [We always thought we wanted to do a show that you could both laugh and cry in thirty minutes, and I don't know that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/we-always-thought-we-wanted-to-do-a-show-that-you-could-both-laugh/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [Jeff Wachtel, who was the main reason our show came back, and also got picked up to begin with, is from the New York…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/jeff-wachtel-who-was-the-main-reason-our-show-came-back-and-also-got/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [You grow and you change, or at least you think you do, but you're kind of the same.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/you-grow-and-you-change-or-at-least-you-think-you-do-but-you-re-kind/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [I just waited tables three nights a week to cover the bases.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/i-just-waited-tables-three-nights-a-week-to-cover-the-bases/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [I would say to someone, 'Make your own stuff sooner.' Also, it's OK to say no to something if it doesn't feel right.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/i-would-say-to-someone-make-your-own-stuff-sooner-also-it-s-ok-to-say/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [I had a moment - and I don't know if it was funny, necessarily, but I realized the effect I could have on people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/i-had-a-moment-and-i-don-t-know-if-it-was-funny-necessarily-but-i/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [Give me a user manual, and I'm happy for hours.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/give-me-a-user-manual-and-i-m-happy-for-hours/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) > [When you have girlfriends, and you get into it, and you share your flaws, and you're like, 'Oh my God. I almost had my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/when-you-have-girlfriends-and-you-get-into-it-and-you-share-your/) [Lennon Parham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) [Explore all 51 Lennon Parham quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/) ## More About quotes > [If you ask an introvert a question, wait until she thinks about it. Introverts think before speaking, not through speaking. If you want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurie-helgoe/if-you-ask-an-introvert-a-question-wait-until-she-thinks-about-it/) [Laurie Helgoe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurie-helgoe/) > [Joking about violence is not funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/perez-hilton/joking-about-violence-is-not-funny/) [Perez Hilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/perez-hilton/) > [I talk to my mates about our kids, being too tired and being worn out.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-willoughby/i-talk-to-my-mates-about-our-kids-being-too-tired-and-being-worn-out/) [Holly Willoughby](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-willoughby/) > [With 'Pretty Girls,' I saw the opportunity to talk not just about crime but what crime leaves behind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karin-slaughter/with-pretty-girls-i-saw-the-opportunity-to-talk-not-just-about-crime/) [Karin Slaughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karin-slaughter/) > [I write about presidents. That means I write about guys - so far. I'm interested in the people closest to them, the people they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-kearns-goodwin/i-write-about-presidents-that-means-i-write-about-guys-so-far-i-m/) [Doris Kearns Goodwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-kearns-goodwin/) > [That's something a lot of folks don't know about me - I'm pretty darn funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-jai-white/that-s-something-a-lot-of-folks-don-t-know-about-me-i-m-pretty-darn/) [Michael Jai White](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-jai-white/) > [I learned a lot about myself at Oakmont.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shane-lowry/i-learned-a-lot-about-myself-at-oakmont/) [Shane Lowry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shane-lowry/) > [I don't think about the press or the crowds or the other leaders of the race. The focus is only on myself. As soon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/magdalena-neuner/i-don-t-think-about-the-press-or-the-crowds-or-the-other-leaders-of/) [Magdalena Neuner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/magdalena-neuner/) > [Sport is not just about entertainment. It is equally about winning and losing, pooling and galvanising the energy of the youth, upgrading people's physical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nita-ambani/sport-is-not-just-about-entertainment-it-is-equally-about-winning-and/) [Nita Ambani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nita-ambani/) > [One of the ways that I discovered my confidence and my ability to overpower is becoming a mother. Suddenly, my world wasn't about myself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lights/one-of-the-ways-that-i-discovered-my-confidence-and-my-ability-to/) [Lights](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lights/) > [I didn't want to do 'Fashion Police' because I thought, 'This is stupid, this is beneath me, who wants to talk about fashion?' It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-didn-t-want-to-do-fashion-police-because-i-thought-this-is-stupid/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I just worried about my weight. Worried about my appearance and thought I wan't pretty enough to be a pop star. It was very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-durham/i-just-worried-about-my-weight-worried-about-my-appearance-and/) [Judith Durham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-durham/) > [I read a couple of books about neuroscience and the relationship between the mind and the body.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-kinnaman/i-read-a-couple-of-books-about-neuroscience-and-the-relationship/) [Joel Kinnaman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-kinnaman/) > [There are a lot of kids out there copying and distributing movies - not because they care about seeing the movies or sharing them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-perry-barlow/there-are-a-lot-of-kids-out-there-copying-and-distributing-movies-not/) [John Perry Barlow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-perry-barlow/) > [I have no physical genius about me. I can't dribble a ball and run at the same time, I can't do lay-ups - I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rich-mullins/i-have-no-physical-genius-about-me-i-can-t-dribble-a-ball-and-run-at/) [Rich Mullins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rich-mullins/) [Browse all 26,122 About quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/about/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend, you usually have some weird, specific thing that you hold on to that you fight about that has nothing to do with what's going on.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lennon Parham" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-partner-or-a-friend-you-usually/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "About" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-partner-or-a-friend-you-usually/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c27/lennon-parham-13306_about_when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-part_1698116.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you get into a fight with your partner or a friend, you usually have some weird, specific thing that…” — Lennon Parham", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Lennon Parham", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lennon-parham/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "When you get into a fight...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-partner-or-a-friend-you-usually/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lennon-parham/when-you-get-into-a-fight-with-your-partner-or-a-friend-you-usually/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```