--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If I had the capacity to withstand…" description: "\"“If I had the capacity to withstand instantaneous physical pain, I think I would have even considered taking a razor to my leg. Because after so long o..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e01/leanne-waters-54147_bulimia_if-i-had-the-capacity-to-withstand-insta_1255795.jpg" --- # If I had the capacity to withstand instantaneous physical… ![“If I had the capacity to withstand instantaneous physical pain, I think I would have even considered taking a razor to my leg. Because after so long of living in that hole, I would have rather felt pain than nothing at all; I just wanted to feel something again. You reach a milestone in such…” quote by Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e01/leanne-waters-54147_bulimia_if-i-had-the-capacity-to-withstand-insta_1255795.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e01/leanne-waters-54147_bulimia_if-i-had-the-capacity-to-withstand-insta_1255795.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e01/leanne-waters-54147_bulimia_if-i-had-the-capacity-to-withstand-insta_1255795.jpg) > ““If I had the capacity to withstand instantaneous physical pain, I think I would have even considered taking a razor to my leg. Because after so long of living in that hole, I would have rather felt pain than nothing at all; I just wanted to feel something again. You reach a milestone in such illnesses when denial lifts and you realize that the things you do are truly damaging both to yourself and to others. By then, however, you learn to not care and you embrace the notion that this method of self-harming is both deserved and satisfying.”” [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Enduring chronic pain, the speaker chooses self‑harm as a way to feel anything, illustrating the desperation of denial and the painful acceptance of self‑destructive coping. **In simple terms:** A person in chronic illness prefers pain over numbness, seeing self‑harm as relief. Key Takeaway Seek compassionate mental health support and healthier coping strategies. Themes pain denial self‑harm mental health desperation Mood desperate anguished introspective Type personal psychological. When to use this quote - hospitalization - therapy sessions - support groups - personal reflection - crisis intervention Key Concepts psychology addiction existential suffering Questions to Reflect On - What healthier ways can one find feeling when numb? - How can support systems better address chronic pain and mental health? A Different Perspective The narrative may romanticize self‑harm, risking harmful imitation. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Bulimia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bulimia/) [Denial](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/denial/) [Eating disorders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/eating-disorders/) [Pain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pain/) [Physical pain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/physical-pain/) [Self harming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self-harming/) ## Related quotes > [“The loneliness I endured during that time of my life is something I hope never to experience again. It's more than just the feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/the-loneliness-i-endured-during-that-time-of-my-life-is-something-i/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) > [Depression is not an act. Bipolar isn't an excuse. Eating disorders aren't phases. Suicide isn't a cowards escape. Homosexuality isn't a disease. Self-harming is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/depression-is-not-an-act-bipolar-isn-t-an-excuse-eating-disorders/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“So there you have it--my sorry tale. That's how something I though I controlled ended up controlling me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-darer-littman/so-there-you-have-it-my-sorry-tale-that-s-how-something-i-though-i/) [Sarah Darer Littman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-darer-littman/) > [“I decided to say something. It was through an email, an email to my mom confessing that I had a problem with food, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachael-rose-steil/i-decided-to-say-something-it-was-through-an-email-an-email-to-my-mom/) [Rachael Rose Steil](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachael-rose-steil/) > [“Find Your Balance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kayla-kotecki/find-your-balance/) Kayla Kotecki > [“Her behaviors turn her psychic pain, which she fears is not legitimate, into physical pain, which is indisputably real".”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheila-m-reindl/her-behaviors-turn-her-psychic-pain-which-she-fears-is-not-legitimate/) [Sheila M. Reindl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheila-m-reindl/) > [“Eating disorders are prevalent among women who were sexually abused as children. They seem to have components of other symptoms such as obsessions, compulsions,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-a-duncan/eating-disorders-are-prevalent-among-women-who-were-sexually-abused/) Karen A. Duncan > [In high school, I had a couple girlfriends who had very extreme eating disorders. Anorexia and bulimia. And in college as well. It's just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-lowes/in-high-school-i-had-a-couple-girlfriends-who-had-very-extreme-eating/) [Katie Lowes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-lowes/) > [“For girls who've been pressured into sex they didn't want, growing into a woman's body can be terrifying. Anorexia and bulimia can be an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-bass/for-girls-who-ve-been-pressured-into-sex-they-didn-t-want-growing/) [Ellen Bass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-bass/) > [“No food will ever hurt you as much as an unhealthy mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brittany-burgunder/no-food-will-ever-hurt-you-as-much-as-an-unhealthy-mind/) [Brittany Burgunder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brittany-burgunder/) > [“In yet another paradox, bulimia nervosa serves as both an expression of feelings and a defense against experiencing feelings, particularly shame, anger, loneliness, sadness,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheila-m-reindl/in-yet-another-paradox-bulimia-nervosa-serves-as-both-an-expression/) [Sheila M. Reindl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheila-m-reindl/) > [“I promise no food will ever hurt you as much as a negative mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brittany-burgunder/i-promise-no-food-will-ever-hurt-you-as-much-as-a-negative-mind/) [Brittany Burgunder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brittany-burgunder/) > [“A bulimic person's shame may lead her to try to hide not only her eating-disorder behaviors but also her basic needs and yearnings. She…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheila-m-reindl/a-bulimic-person-s-shame-may-lead-her-to-try-to-hide-not-only-her/) [Sheila M. Reindl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheila-m-reindl/) > [I struggled with restricting and purging. It is not really anorexia or bulimia. It is more anorexia than bulimia, but it doesnt fit super…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/malika-andrews/i-struggled-with-restricting-and-purging-it-is-not-really-anorexia-or/) [Malika Andrews](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/malika-andrews/) > [“Let go of toxic control, in order to regain healthy control.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kayla-rose-kotecki/let-go-of-toxic-control-in-order-to-regain-healthy-control/) Kayla Rose Kotecki ## More by Leanne Waters > [“You see, a binge is almost always inevitable when one goes withut eating for such a long period of time. It doesn't just satisfy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/you-see-a-binge-is-almost-always-inevitable-when-one-goes-withut/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) > [“My body had never felt so small or so fragile. In one sense, it was a moment of ecstasy and I was comforted with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/my-body-had-never-felt-so-small-or-so-fragile-in-one-sense-it-was-a/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) > [“The loneliness I endured during that time of my life is something I hope never to experience again. It's more than just the feeling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/the-loneliness-i-endured-during-that-time-of-my-life-is-something-i/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) > [“Life is a funny thing. We claim it to be our own; but the truth is, it's not. It belongs to something much bigger.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/life-is-a-funny-thing-we-claim-it-to-be-our-own-but-the-truth-is-it-s/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) > [“The barriers we face in life are so often the ones we create in our minds. As a child I couldn’t open that wooden…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne-waters/the-barriers-we-face-in-life-are-so-often-the-ones-we-create-in-our/) [Leanne Waters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) [Explore all 6 Leanne Waters quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne-waters/) ## More Bulimia quotes > [ “Emma cites the structure of the \[Eating Disorder\] Unit as being important to her decision to disengage from her illness, and the fact that… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carol-lee/emma-cites-the-structure-of-the-eating-disorder-unit-as-being/) [Carol Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carol-lee/) > [Becoming the new feminine ideal requires just the right combination of insecurity, exercise, bulimia and surgery.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/becoming-the-new-feminine-ideal-requires-just-the-right-combination/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Especially as a chef, I didn't really want to talk about it because I felt like it kind of undermined my entire career. How…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-whaite/especially-as-a-chef-i-didn-t-really-want-to-talk-about-it-because-i/) [John Whaite](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-whaite/) > [In the '80s, I did two hours of cardio every day, split between running and the stationary bike. It was a trap - afterward…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/skip-bayless/in-the-80s-i-did-two-hours-of-cardio-every-day-split-between-running/) [Skip Bayless](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/skip-bayless/) > [“So there you have it--my sorry tale. That's how something I though I controlled ended up controlling me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-darer-littman/so-there-you-have-it-my-sorry-tale-that-s-how-something-i-though-i/) [Sarah Darer Littman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-darer-littman/) > [We think of bulimia and anorexia as either a bizarre psychosis, or as a quirky little habit, a phase, or as a thing that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marya-hornbacher/we-think-of-bulimia-and-anorexia-as-either-a-bizarre-psychosis-or-as/) [Marya Hornbacher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marya-hornbacher/) > [I had a very unhealthy relationship with food that turned into bulimia.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/candace-cameron-bure/i-had-a-very-unhealthy-relationship-with-food-that-turned-into-bulimia/) [Candace Cameron Bure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/candace-cameron-bure/) > [Dear Anorexia, You are my best friend, and my worst enemy at the same time You are my greatest achievement, and yet my most…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dakota-blue-cicilline/dear-anorexia-you-are-my-best-friend-and-my-worst-enemy-at-the-same/) Dakota Blue Cicilline > [If I'm going through a particular period at work or where I feel that I'm out of control and everything's sort of spiralling, I've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-whaite/if-i-m-going-through-a-particular-period-at-work-or-where-i-feel-that/) [John Whaite](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-whaite/) > [If you are going to recover you HAVE to want to.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-are-going-to-recover-you-have-to-want-to/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I struggled with restricting and purging. It is not really anorexia or bulimia. It is more anorexia than bulimia, but it doesnt fit super…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/malika-andrews/i-struggled-with-restricting-and-purging-it-is-not-really-anorexia-or/) [Malika Andrews](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/malika-andrews/) > [“I can honestly say, with complete disappointment, that I have never purged in my life, because I have what I call a barfing disorder.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathy-griffin/i-can-honestly-say-with-complete-disappointment-that-i-have-never/) [Kathy Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathy-griffin/) > [“A bulimic person's shame may lead her to try to hide not only her eating-disorder behaviors but also her basic needs and yearnings. She…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sheila-m-reindl/a-bulimic-person-s-shame-may-lead-her-to-try-to-hide-not-only-her/) [Sheila M. Reindl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sheila-m-reindl/) > [My bulimia was my addiction. Hurting myself was my addiction... The music is what saved me. That's the only thing I can trust.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-scherzinger/my-bulimia-was-my-addiction-hurting-myself-was-my-addiction-the-music/) [Nicole Scherzinger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-scherzinger/) > [“I promise no food will ever hurt you as much as a negative mind.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brittany-burgunder/i-promise-no-food-will-ever-hurt-you-as-much-as-a-negative-mind/) [Brittany Burgunder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brittany-burgunder/) [Browse all 79 Bulimia quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bulimia/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If I had the capacity to withstand instantaneous physical pain, I think I would have even considered taking a razor to my leg. Because after so long of living in that hole, I would have rather felt pain than nothing at all; I just wanted to feel something again. 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