---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Your parents were fighting machines and…"
description: "\"“Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective moneymaking ma..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg"
---

#  Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying…

![“Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective moneymaking machine, and your father was programmed to bawl out your mother for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other…” quote by Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg)

> ““Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective moneymaking machine, and your father was programmed to bawl out your mother for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other out for being defective loving machines. Then your father was programmed to stomp out of the house and slam the door. This automatically turned your mother into a weeping machine. And your father would go down to the tavern where he would get drunk with some other drinking machines. Then all the drinking machines would go to a whorehouse and rent fucking machines. And then your father would drag himself home to become an apologizing machine. And your mother would become a very slow forgiving machine.””

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Family dynamics are depicted as mechanistic, showing how inherited roles and coping mechanisms create cycles of dysfunction and forgiveness.

**In simple terms:** Families act like machines, repeating patterns of blame and repair.

Key Takeaway

Recognize and break harmful cycles.

Themes

family dysfunction roles forgiveness cycles

Mood

reflective somber hopeful

Type

analytical emotional inspirational

When to use this quote

- marriage counseling
- parental conflict
- addiction recovery
- personal growth
- generational trauma

Key Concepts

psychology systems theory behavioral patterns

Questions to Reflect On

- How do you see these patterns in your own family?
- What steps can you take to alter them?

A Different Perspective

Individuals may resist change despite awareness.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Computers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/computers/) [Mother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mother/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/)

## Related quotes

> [As for myself: I had come to the conclusion that there was nothing sacred about myself or about any human being, that we were…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/as-for-myself-i-had-come-to-the-conclusion-that-there-was-nothing/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“According to this model, human beings are, at least in one aspect, sensation-receiving machines; and although our receptory apparatus is competent to select and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cruce-stark/according-to-this-model-human-beings-are-at-least-in-one-aspect/)

Cruce Stark

> [Can you imagine any better example of divine creative accomplishment that the consummate flying machine that is a bird? The skeleton, very flexible and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/guy-murchie/can-you-imagine-any-better-example-of-divine-creative-accomplishment/)

[Guy Murchie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/guy-murchie/)

> [Computers can be taught that certain tune or certain chords changes will sound pleasant together, but I don't think it's going to reach a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bonobo/computers-can-be-taught-that-certain-tune-or-certain-chords-changes/)

[Bonobo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bonobo/)

> [“Alan Turing proposed the Turing Test: a computer is intelligent if you can't tell it from a human when you talk with it. No…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cjs-hayward/alan-turing-proposed-the-turing-test-a-computer-is-intelligent-if-you/)

[CJS Hayward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cjs-hayward/)

> [The popular mind often pictures gigantic flying machines speeding across the Atlantic carrying innumerable passengers in a way analogous to our modern steam ships.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-henry-pickering/the-popular-mind-often-pictures-gigantic-flying-machines-speeding/)

William Henry Pickering

> [The display is the computer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jen-hsun-huang/the-display-is-the-computer/)

Jen-Hsun Huang

> [The corporate state is an immensely powerful machine, ordered, legalistic, rational, yet utterly out of human control, wholly and perfectly indifferent to any human…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-a-reich/the-corporate-state-is-an-immensely-powerful-machine-ordered/)

[Charles A. Reich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-a-reich/)

> [If you stood me in a costume next to a computer graphic of the same-looking character, I think there would be a difference. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/warwick-davis/if-you-stood-me-in-a-costume-next-to-a-computer-graphic-of-the-same/)

[Warwick Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/warwick-davis/)

> [“You weren't born to be a cog in the giant industrial machine. You were trained to become a cog. There's an alternative available to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-godin/you-weren-t-born-to-be-a-cog-in-the-giant-industrial-machine-you-were/)

[Seth Godin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-godin/)

> [“Note found in the patron suggestion box: "You have SIGNS up near the computers that say BE QUIET, but people don't be quiet. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gina-sheridan/note-found-in-the-patron-suggestion-box-you-have-signs-up-near-the/)

[Gina Sheridan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gina-sheridan/)

> [Issac:"I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters." Computer: "I don't understand-" Issac: "Me neither. Pause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/issac-i-dislike-living-in-a-world-without-augustus-waters-computer-i/)

[John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/)

> [The time that one gains cannot be accumulated in a storehouse; it is contradictory to want to save up existence, which, the fact is,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simone-de-beauvoir/the-time-that-one-gains-cannot-be-accumulated-in-a-storehouse-it-is/)

[Simone de Beauvoir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simone-de-beauvoir/)

> [“Probably it goes without saying, but time machine guys don't get a lot of action. Had a one night stand with something cute a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-yu/probably-it-goes-without-saying-but-time-machine-guys-don-t-get-a-lot/)

[Charles Yu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-yu/)

> [I don't understand why we're all connected wirelessly via a little machine that goes in our pocket, to everybody in the world, and you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-m-chu/i-don-t-understand-why-we-re-all-connected-wirelessly-via-a-little/)

[Jon M. Chu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-m-chu/)

## More by Kurt Vonnegut

> [“You must bloom as a writer and I must bloom as a painter. Everything else about us is uninteresting.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/you-must-bloom-as-a-writer-and-i-must-bloom-as-a-painter-everything/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“People aren't supposed to look back.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/people-aren-t-supposed-to-look-back/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“Have a good nap, did you?” said the porter. “Yes,” said Billy. “Man,” said the porter, “you sure had a hard-on.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/have-a-good-nap-did-you-said-the-porter-yes-said-billy-man-said-the/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“I told him that if we doubted that we are demons in Hell, he should read The Mysterious Stranger, which Mark Twain wrote in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/i-told-him-that-if-we-doubted-that-we-are-demons-in-hell-he-should/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [ “Thomas Jefferson High School \[..\] His high school was named after a slave owner who was also one of the world’s greatest theoreticians on… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/thomas-jefferson-high-school-his-high-school-was-named-after-a-slave/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“I had a certain amount of skill as a dramatist, and Dr. Goebbels wanted me to use it”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/i-had-a-certain-amount-of-skill-as-a-dramatist-and-dr-goebbels-wanted/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [I was some of the mud that got to sit up and look around. Lucky me, lucky mud.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/i-was-some-of-the-mud-that-got-to-sit-up-and-look-around-lucky-me/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“The town was Newport, Rhode Island, U.S.A., Earth, Solar System, Milky Way.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/the-town-was-newport-rhode-island-u-s-a-earth-solar-system-milky-way/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“Her face was one of a kind, a surprising variation that made observers think, Yes--that would be another very nice way for people to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/her-face-was-one-of-a-kind-a-surprising-variation-that-made-observers/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“You finally fell in love, I see,” said Salo. “Only an Earthling year ago,” said Constant. “It took us that long to realize that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/you-finally-fell-in-love-i-see-said-salo-only-an-earthling-year-ago/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“Like all Earthlings at the point of death, Mary Young sent faint reminders of herself to those who had known her. She released a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/like-all-earthlings-at-the-point-of-death-mary-young-sent-faint/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“And contrast Mary Kathleen, if you will, with my wife Ruth, the Ophelia of the death camps, who believed that even the most intelligent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/and-contrast-mary-kathleen-if-you-will-with-my-wife-ruth-the-ophelia/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [Someday, someday, this crazy world will have to end, And our God will take things back that He to us did lend. And if,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/someday-someday-this-crazy-world-will-have-to-end-and-our-god-will/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“They were going back to the slaughterhouse for souvenirs of the war.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/they-were-going-back-to-the-slaughterhouse-for-souvenirs-of-the-war/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

> [“There are plenty of good reasons for fighting," I said, "but no good reason ever to hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/there-are-plenty-of-good-reasons-for-fighting-i-said-but-no-good/)

[Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

[Explore all 2,089 Kurt Vonnegut quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/)

## More Computers quotes

> [I don't understand why we're all connected wirelessly via a little machine that goes in our pocket, to everybody in the world, and you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-m-chu/i-don-t-understand-why-we-re-all-connected-wirelessly-via-a-little/)

[Jon M. Chu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-m-chu/)

> [“Probably it goes without saying, but time machine guys don't get a lot of action. Had a one night stand with something cute a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-yu/probably-it-goes-without-saying-but-time-machine-guys-don-t-get-a-lot/)

[Charles Yu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-yu/)

> [The time that one gains cannot be accumulated in a storehouse; it is contradictory to want to save up existence, which, the fact is,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simone-de-beauvoir/the-time-that-one-gains-cannot-be-accumulated-in-a-storehouse-it-is/)

[Simone de Beauvoir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simone-de-beauvoir/)

> [Issac:"I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters." Computer: "I don't understand-" Issac: "Me neither. Pause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/issac-i-dislike-living-in-a-world-without-augustus-waters-computer-i/)

[John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/)

> [“Note found in the patron suggestion box: "You have SIGNS up near the computers that say BE QUIET, but people don't be quiet. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gina-sheridan/note-found-in-the-patron-suggestion-box-you-have-signs-up-near-the/)

[Gina Sheridan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gina-sheridan/)

> [“You weren't born to be a cog in the giant industrial machine. You were trained to become a cog. There's an alternative available to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-godin/you-weren-t-born-to-be-a-cog-in-the-giant-industrial-machine-you-were/)

[Seth Godin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-godin/)

> [If you stood me in a costume next to a computer graphic of the same-looking character, I think there would be a difference. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/warwick-davis/if-you-stood-me-in-a-costume-next-to-a-computer-graphic-of-the-same/)

[Warwick Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/warwick-davis/)

> [The corporate state is an immensely powerful machine, ordered, legalistic, rational, yet utterly out of human control, wholly and perfectly indifferent to any human…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-a-reich/the-corporate-state-is-an-immensely-powerful-machine-ordered/)

[Charles A. Reich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-a-reich/)

> [The display is the computer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jen-hsun-huang/the-display-is-the-computer/)

Jen-Hsun Huang

> [The popular mind often pictures gigantic flying machines speeding across the Atlantic carrying innumerable passengers in a way analogous to our modern steam ships.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-henry-pickering/the-popular-mind-often-pictures-gigantic-flying-machines-speeding/)

William Henry Pickering

> [“Alan Turing proposed the Turing Test: a computer is intelligent if you can't tell it from a human when you talk with it. No…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cjs-hayward/alan-turing-proposed-the-turing-test-a-computer-is-intelligent-if-you/)

[CJS Hayward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cjs-hayward/)

> [Computers can be taught that certain tune or certain chords changes will sound pleasant together, but I don't think it's going to reach a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bonobo/computers-can-be-taught-that-certain-tune-or-certain-chords-changes/)

[Bonobo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bonobo/)

> [Can you imagine any better example of divine creative accomplishment that the consummate flying machine that is a bird? The skeleton, very flexible and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/guy-murchie/can-you-imagine-any-better-example-of-divine-creative-accomplishment/)

[Guy Murchie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/guy-murchie/)

> [“According to this model, human beings are, at least in one aspect, sensation-receiving machines; and although our receptory apparatus is competent to select and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cruce-stark/according-to-this-model-human-beings-are-at-least-in-one-aspect/)

Cruce Stark

> [As in any machine, all the wires must be connected to the mains through one main wire. In the same way, you all must…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nirmala-srivastava/as-in-any-machine-all-the-wires-must-be-connected-to-the-mains/)

[Nirmala Srivastava](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nirmala-srivastava/)

[Browse all 9,389 Computers quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/computers/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective moneymaking machine, and your father was programmed to bawl out your mother for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other out for being defective loving machines. Then your father was programmed to stomp out of the house and slam the door. This automatically turned your mother into a weeping machine. And your father would go down to the tavern where he would get drunk with some other drinking machines. Then all the drinking machines would go to a whorehouse and rent fucking machines. And then your father would drag himself home to become an apologizing machine. And your mother would become a very slow forgiving machine.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Kurt Vonnegut"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and-self-pitying-machines-your/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Computers"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and-self-pitying-machines-your/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ca/kurt-vonnegut-41_computers_your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and_2513884.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your…” — Kurt Vonnegut",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Kurt Vonnegut",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“Your parents were fighting machines and...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and-self-pitying-machines-your/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/your-parents-were-fighting-machines-and-self-pitying-machines-your/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
