--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: As a young woman, I was so eager to…" description: "\"As a young woman, I was so eager to please that I served others' happiness and even their values before my own. It didn't earn me love, but it did deli..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abb/kathryn-harrison-31690_chose_as-a-young-woman-i-was-so-eager-to-pleas_257723.jpg" --- # As a young woman, I was so eager to please that I served… ![“As a young woman, I was so eager to please that I served others' happiness and even their values before my own. It didn't earn me love, but it did deliver me to a place where I had to choose between what I thought of myself and what other people did. I chose myself.” quote by Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abb/kathryn-harrison-31690_chose_as-a-young-woman-i-was-so-eager-to-pleas_257723.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abb/kathryn-harrison-31690_chose_as-a-young-woman-i-was-so-eager-to-pleas_257723.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abb/kathryn-harrison-31690_chose_as-a-young-woman-i-was-so-eager-to-pleas_257723.jpg) > “As a young woman, I was so eager to please that I served others' happiness and even their values before my own. It didn't earn me love, but it did deliver me to a place where I had to choose between what I thought of myself and what other people did. I chose myself.” [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The author recounts prioritizing others' happiness over her own, leading to self‑loss, then choosing self‑respect and personal identity. **In simple terms:** She stopped living for others and chose herself. Key Takeaway Prioritize self‑care and authentic values. Themes self‑discovery boundaries personal autonomy Mood introspective empowering Type reflective motivational When to use this quote - relationships - career decisions - family dynamics Key Concepts psychology identity formation Questions to Reflect On - What does it mean to honor yourself? - How can you set healthy boundaries? A Different Perspective Self‑choice can cause conflict with loved ones. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Values](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/values/) [Young woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/young-woman/) [Young women](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/young-women/) ## Related quotes > [If giving out all I possess will earn me your love the I will give more than that, I will give you my heart…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chidubem-mbamobi/if-giving-out-all-i-possess-will-earn-me-your-love-the-i-will-give/) Chidubem Mbamobi > [“You don't have to earn love. It either is or isn't.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-ortolon/you-don-t-have-to-earn-love-it-either-is-or-isn-t/) [Julie Ortolon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-ortolon/) > [“He grabbed hold of her, pulling her against him. A small gasp of surprise escaped her as he fell to his knees before her.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-stevens/he-grabbed-hold-of-her-pulling-her-against-him-a-small-gasp-of/) [Erica Stevens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erica-stevens/) > [“You do not have to change yourself to appease anyone. You are perfectly worthy as you are. You do not have to earn love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vanessa-ooms/you-do-not-have-to-change-yourself-to-appease-anyone-you-are/) Vanessa Ooms > [“People in everyday life can sniff out the neediness of a performer trying to earn love.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lysa-terkeurst/people-in-everyday-life-can-sniff-out-the-neediness-of-a-performer/) [Lysa TerKeurst](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lysa-terkeurst/) > [Earn to love the people Who are willing to love u at present Forget the people in the past and thank Them 4 hurting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wasteofspace/earn-to-love-the-people-who-are-willing-to-love-u-at-present-forget/) [Wasteofspace](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wasteofspace/) > [“If beauty is pain — let me get lost in it. If you’re my salvation — I want to earn it. If love is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-van-dyken/if-beauty-is-pain-let-me-get-lost-in-it-if-you-re-my-salvation-i-want/) [Rachel Van Dyken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-van-dyken/) > [“RELAX IN MY PRESENCE, KNOWING THAT nothing can separate you from My Love. The worst-case scenario in your life—that I might stop loving you—is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-young/relax-in-my-presence-knowing-that-nothing-can-separate-you-from-my/) [Sarah Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-young/) > [I don't want to have to earn love by giving up my ability to make decisions that determine how I live.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eloisa-james/i-don-t-want-to-have-to-earn-love-by-giving-up-my-ability-to-make/) [Eloisa James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eloisa-james/) > [Knowing the personality of the one you are dealing with helps you earn his love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dr-al-arifi/knowing-the-personality-of-the-one-you-are-dealing-with-helps-you/) [Dr Al-Arifi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dr-al-arifi/) > [Apart from the money actors earn, it is the love and appreciation that keeps everyone looking forward to do more.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neena-gupta/apart-from-the-money-actors-earn-it-is-the-love-and-appreciation-that/) [Neena Gupta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neena-gupta/) > [“Aly, "It doesn't work like that. We don't earn love... it's a gift we're given.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-l-jackson/aly-it-doesn-t-work-like-that-we-don-t-earn-love-it-s-a-gift-we-re/) [A.L. Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-l-jackson/) > [You'll have to prove yourself to hell and back a million diffrent times to earn love & trust back. Realize what you have from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daviddave/you-ll-have-to-prove-yourself-to-hell-and-back-a-million-diffrent/) DavidDave > [You are not a man until you give your love, truly and freely to a child. And you are not a good man until…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-david-roberts/you-are-not-a-man-until-you-give-your-love-truly-and-freely-to-a/) [Gregory David Roberts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-david-roberts/) > [“I'm slowly seeing that God really does love me, although I still sometimes try to earn his love and depend on my talents, achievements,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-palmer/i-m-slowly-seeing-that-god-really-does-love-me-although-i-still/) [Jim Palmer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-palmer/) ## More by Kathryn Harrison > [I've always been interested in the intersection between our rational and our unconscious lives.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/i-ve-always-been-interested-in-the-intersection-between-our-rational/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [“If complete enlightenment demands relinquishing the self, then complete enlightenment implies the acceptance of mortality. Not that there isn't more to being enlightened than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/if-complete-enlightenment-demands-relinquishing-the-self-then/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [Sometimes there's a sort of tear in the veil, and there are people who live in more than one dimension.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/sometimes-there-s-a-sort-of-tear-in-the-veil-and-there-are-people-who/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [We're taught to expect unconditional love from our parents, but I think it is more the gift our children give us. It's they who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/we-re-taught-to-expect-unconditional-love-from-our-parents-but-i/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [“There must be many of us whose lives have been divided into a before and after, with an accident, a death, a crime, a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/there-must-be-many-of-us-whose-lives-have-been-divided-into-a-before/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [The dizzy rapture of starving. The power of needing nothing. By force of will I make myself the impossible sprite who lives on air,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/the-dizzy-rapture-of-starving-the-power-of-needing-nothing-by-force/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [“It's terrible to live believing that everything you do is of the utmost importance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/it-s-terrible-to-live-believing-that-everything-you-do-is-of-the/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [I can't work out much about myself or what I see in the world around me unless I do it through writing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/i-can-t-work-out-much-about-myself-or-what-i-see-in-the-world-around/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [My days are as long as despair can make them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/my-days-are-as-long-as-despair-can-make-them/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [There aren't many people in our history who have so completely surrendered themselves to a mission that they would give up their lives for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/there-aren-t-many-people-in-our-history-who-have-so-completely/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [Writing is how I stay sane. It's completely necessary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/writing-is-how-i-stay-sane-it-s-completely-necessary/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [Scars are stories, history written on the body](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/scars-are-stories-history-written-on-the-body/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [For me, writing is inseparable from thinking. I could say the entire undertaking is a vast cerebral construct against my demons. It's the thing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/for-me-writing-is-inseparable-from-thinking-i-could-say-the-entire/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [Don’t portray yourself as who you want to be. Portray yourself as who you are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/don-t-portray-yourself-as-who-you-want-to-be-portray-yourself-as-who/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) > [I like nudging readers into a slightly different perspective, but in a sly way - I want to be the writer who slips a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathryn-harrison/i-like-nudging-readers-into-a-slightly-different-perspective-but-in-a/) [Kathryn Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) [Explore all 16 Kathryn Harrison quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathryn-harrison/) ## More Chose quotes > [“None of us can chose where we will love.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-kay/none-of-us-can-chose-where-we-will-love/) [Susan Kay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-kay/) > [I just decided to take some time off. I've been modeling since '93, '92, and that's a pretty long time. I'm a single mother…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-murphy/i-just-decided-to-take-some-time-off-i-ve-been-modeling-since-93-92/) [Carolyn Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-murphy/) > [“i chose not to run”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-seinfeld/i-chose-not-to-run/) [Jerry Seinfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-seinfeld/) > [I saw Islam as the correct way to live, and I chose to try to live that way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kareem-abdul-jabbar/i-saw-islam-as-the-correct-way-to-live-and-i-chose-to-try-to-live/) [Kareem Abdul-Jabbar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kareem-abdul-jabbar/) > [I chose Juventus for their winning mindset.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wojciech-szczesny/i-chose-juventus-for-their-winning-mindset/) [Wojciech Szczesny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wojciech-szczesny/) > [Perhaps God chose me to be an atheist?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-vaughan/perhaps-god-chose-me-to-be-an-atheist/) [Bill Vaughan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-vaughan/) > [“Everyone have the free willing to chose which kind of life he wanna live, to be remembered or forgotten”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/el-hachemi-sabi/everyone-have-the-free-willing-to-chose-which-kind-of-life-he-wanna/) El hachemi Sabi > [“You can survive alone, or you can \*live\* together. I know which option William would chose—has chosen,” he said, shaking me as if he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-williams/you-can-survive-alone-or-you-can-live-together-i-know-which-option/) [Nicole Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-williams/) > [I chose deliberately for Harry Bosch to age chronologically with the books.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-connelly/i-chose-deliberately-for-harry-bosch-to-age-chronologically-with-the/) [Michael Connelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-connelly/) > [God chose what is weakest in the world to shame the strong.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-eagleton/god-chose-what-is-weakest-in-the-world-to-shame-the-strong/) [Terry Eagleton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-eagleton/) > [Chose the niche that you enjoy, where you can excel and stand a chance of becoming and acknowledged leader.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-koch/chose-the-niche-that-you-enjoy-where-you-can-excel-and-stand-a-chance/) [Richard Koch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-koch/) > [If you chose to be an actor, if you take that baton and say 'OK, this is what I want to do with my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leigh-whannell/if-you-chose-to-be-an-actor-if-you-take-that-baton-and-say-ok-this-is/) [Leigh Whannell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leigh-whannell/) > [What if I couldn't handle people's opinions of me? I know that shouldn't dictate a person's degree of peace or happiness in life, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-evans/what-if-i-couldn-t-handle-people-s-opinions-of-me-i-know-that-shouldn/) [Chris Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-evans/) > [You chose to give away your love. You chose to have a broken heart. You chose to give up. You chose to hang on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-chose-to-give-away-your-love-you-chose-to-have-a-broken-heart-you/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I chose to be a working wife and mother. Why should I compromise on either?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chanda-kochhar/i-chose-to-be-a-working-wife-and-mother-why-should-i-compromise-on/) [Chanda Kochhar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chanda-kochhar/) Browse all 504 Chose quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "As a young woman, I was so eager to please that I served others' happiness and even their values before my own. It didn't earn me love, but it did deliver me to a place where I had to choose between what I thought of myself and what other people did. 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