--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: All these things we do bespeak a terrible…" description: "\"“All these things we do bespeak a terrible anxiety: that our children simply will not be able to make it through life if we do not perform totemic acts..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c65/judith-warner-28813_anxiety_all-these-things-we-do-bespeak-a-terribl_1729600.jpg" --- # All these things we do bespeak a terrible anxiety: that… ![“All these things we do bespeak a terrible anxiety: that our children simply will not be able to make it through life if we do not perform totemic acts to keep them on the path toward self-perfection and keep their lives pure and unfettered by distracting emotion, personality foibles, or…” quote by Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c65/judith-warner-28813_anxiety_all-these-things-we-do-bespeak-a-terribl_1729600.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c65/judith-warner-28813_anxiety_all-these-things-we-do-bespeak-a-terribl_1729600.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c65/judith-warner-28813_anxiety_all-these-things-we-do-bespeak-a-terribl_1729600.jpg) > ““All these things we do bespeak a terrible anxiety: that our children simply will not be able to make it through life if we do not perform totemic acts to keep them on the path toward self-perfection and keep their lives pure and unfettered by distracting emotion, personality foibles, or less-than-ideal experiences.”” [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The quote warns that over‑protective parenting driven by anxiety can stifle children’s growth and authentic experience. **In simple terms:** Over‑protective parenting harms children. Key Takeaway Allow children to face challenges. Themes parenting anxiety growth authenticity Mood concerned reflective Type advice philosophical When to use this quote - raising teens - education - mental health counseling - family therapy Key Concepts developmental psychology self‑determination emotional regulation Questions to Reflect On - How much control is too much? - What risks are necessary for growth? A Different Perspective Children need some discomfort to develop resilience. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Anxiety](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anxiety/) [Child](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Emotion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotion/) [Fear](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fear/) [Motherhood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/motherhood/) [Perfection](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perfection/) [Personality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/personality/) ## Related quotes > [“The Mommy Mystique tells us that we are the luckiest women in the world -- the freest, with the most choices, the broadest horizons,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/the-mommy-mystique-tells-us-that-we-are-the-luckiest-women-in-the/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [“We seem to feel as though the life our children have -- that we have built for them -- is just a delicate house…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/we-seem-to-feel-as-though-the-life-our-children-have-that-we-have/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [You know, the only thing that was distracting was when you have your emotion up and they're changing the lights or they're changing the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-clark-duncan/you-know-the-only-thing-that-was-distracting-was-when-you-have-your/) [Michael Clark Duncan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-clark-duncan/) > [“Something is missing, and it's something not so easy to name as semiabsent husbands, not so easy to point to as a lack of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/something-is-missing-and-it-s-something-not-so-easy-to-name-as/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [“--what's really unique about maternal anxiety today is our belief that if something goes wrong with or for our children, it's a reflection on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/what-s-really-unique-about-maternal-anxiety-today-is-our-belief-that/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [“Too many of us now allow ourselves to be defined by motherhood and direct every ounce of our energy into our children. 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I'd reached an age when I had to grow up and start…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gianluigi-buffon/i-went-through-a-lot-of-changes-and-a-period-of-depression-i-d/) [Gianluigi Buffon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gianluigi-buffon/) > [I have reared, or helped to rear, five children and the scariest bit, bar none, is the learning-to-drive part. It has filled me with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-smiley/i-have-reared-or-helped-to-rear-five-children-and-the-scariest-bit/) [Jane Smiley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-smiley/) > [I'm terribly prone to anxiety. I get very depressed and I get very anxious and my anxiety is almost always about my children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-a-gill/i-m-terribly-prone-to-anxiety-i-get-very-depressed-and-i-get-very/) [A. A. Gill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-a-gill/) > [Anxiety in children is originally nothing other than an expression of the fact they are feeling the loss of the person they love.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sigmund-freud/anxiety-in-children-is-originally-nothing-other-than-an-expression-of/) [Sigmund Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sigmund-freud/) > [Trains induce such terrible anxiety. They image the possibility of total and irrevocable failure. They are also dirty, rackety, packed with strangers, an object…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iris-murdoch/trains-induce-such-terrible-anxiety-they-image-the-possibility-of/) [Iris Murdoch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/iris-murdoch/) > [I criticise myself an awful lot. I do worry to the point that I don't think it's very healthy. I'm always picking my flaws.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roxanne-mckee/i-criticise-myself-an-awful-lot-i-do-worry-to-the-point-that-i-don-t/) [Roxanne McKee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roxanne-mckee/) > [I mistook the depression and anxiety my children were experiencing for the average, if unpleasant, moodiness we all associate with teenagers. I was drawing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cynthia-germanotta/i-mistook-the-depression-and-anxiety-my-children-were-experiencing/) [Cynthia Germanotta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cynthia-germanotta/) ## More by Judith Warner > [“The Mommy Mystique tells us that we are the luckiest women in the world -- the freest, with the most choices, the broadest horizons,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/the-mommy-mystique-tells-us-that-we-are-the-luckiest-women-in-the/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [“We seem to feel as though the life our children have -- that we have built for them -- is just a delicate house…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-warner/we-seem-to-feel-as-though-the-life-our-children-have-that-we-have/) [Judith Warner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-warner/) > [“Too many of us now allow ourselves to be defined by motherhood and direct every ounce of our energy into our children. 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Fear of falling asleep at night. Fear of not falling asleep. Fear of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/raymond-carver/fear-of-seeing-a-police-car-pull-into-the-drive-fear-of-falling/) [Raymond Carver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/raymond-carver/) > [I get nervous when I don't get nervous. If I'm nervous I know I'm going to have a good show.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beyonce-knowles/i-get-nervous-when-i-don-t-get-nervous-if-i-m-nervous-i-know-i-m/) [Beyonce Knowles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beyonce-knowles/) > [“Every invention comes through anxiousness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rakesh-wadhwani/every-invention-comes-through-anxiousness/) [Rakesh Wadhwani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rakesh-wadhwani/) > [“Do Not Be Anxious 25 e “Therefore I tell you,  f do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/do-not-be-anxious-25-e-therefore-i-tell-you-f-do-not-be-anxious-about/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Nothing happens on its own, you have to make things happen. If you really want to come out of your stressful situation than you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/subodh-gupta/nothing-happens-on-its-own-you-have-to-make-things-happen-if-you/) [Subodh Gupta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/subodh-gupta/) > [“I guess if we're talking about my anxiety, the even truthier truth is it started way before that.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kerry-winfrey/i-guess-if-we-re-talking-about-my-anxiety-the-even-truthier-truth-is/) [Kerry Winfrey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kerry-winfrey/) > [I was a very good student. Procrastinating gives me anxiety, and getting a B really ticked me off. 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