--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: For most women being other-directed…" description: "\"For most women being other-directed, focused on how other people feel and nurturing them, was (and can still be) a quality that girls were (are) heavil..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg" --- # For most women being other-directed, focused on how other… ![“For most women being other-directed, focused on how other people feel and nurturing them, was (and can still be) a quality that girls were (are) heavily pressured to become. The unselfish or Self-less woman was (is) seen as ideal. The realization and articulation that the cultural ideal of the…” quote by Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg) > “For most women being other-directed, focused on how other people feel and nurturing them, was (and can still be) a quality that girls were (are) heavily pressured to become. The unselfish or Self-less woman was (is) seen as ideal. The realization and articulation that the cultural ideal of the perfect woman was someone who had no sense of Self and was a key part of the angry energy that drove Feminism to its swift success.” [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The cultural ideal of a selfless woman suppresses personal identity, fueling feminist critique. **In simple terms:** Idealizing selflessness erodes self. Key Takeaway Recognize and value personal self. Themes feminism gender roles identity Mood reflective critical Type theoretical inspirational When to use this quote - workplace dynamics - family expectations - media representation Key Concepts self‑concept cultural pressure idealization Questions to Reflect On - What does “self” mean to you? - How can self‑care coexist with caring for others? A Different Perspective Overemphasis on selflessness can ignore healthy interdependence. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Cultural Ideal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cultural-ideal-1864606/) [Energy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/energy/) [Feminism](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feminism/) [Focused](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/focused/) [Girl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/girl/) [Ideal Realization](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ideal-realization-1864608/) [Identity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/identity/) [Nurturing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nurturing/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Perfect](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perfect/) [Perfect woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perfect-woman/) [Quality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/quality/) [Realization](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/realization/) [Self Woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self-woman-501692/) [Sense of self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sense-of-self/) [That girl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/that-girl/) [Unselfish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unselfish/) [Unselfish Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unselfish-self-1864607/) ## Related quotes > [“There is something in the unselfish and self-sacrificing love of a brute, which goes directly to the heart of him who has had frequent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-allen-poe/there-is-something-in-the-unselfish-and-self-sacrificing-love-of-a-2/) [Edgar Allen Poe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-allen-poe/) > [There is something in the unselfish and self-sacrificing love of a brute, which goes directly to the heart of him who has had frequent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-allan-poe/there-is-something-in-the-unselfish-and-self-sacrificing-love-of-a/) [Edgar Allan Poe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-allan-poe/) > [“When it comes to current attitudes about surgery, the practice of dismissing the cultural context and rationalizing it as individual betterment "flattens the terrain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andi-zeisler/when-it-comes-to-current-attitudes-about-surgery-the-practice-of/) [Andi Zeisler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andi-zeisler/) > [The American cultural ideal of the self-made man, of everyone standing on his own feet, is as tragic a picture as the initiative –…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-lewin/the-american-cultural-ideal-of-the-self-made-man-of-everyone-standing/) [Kurt Lewin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-lewin/) > [For the first time, the weird and the stupid and the coarse are becoming our cultural norms, even our cultural ideal.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-bernstein/for-the-first-time-the-weird-and-the-stupid-and-the-coarse-are/) [Carl Bernstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-bernstein/) > [The media is biased against me because I'm a self-made woman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-jayalalithaa/the-media-is-biased-against-me-because-i-m-a-self-made-woman/) [J. Jayalalithaa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-jayalalithaa/) > [Oprah is definitely a self-made woman and she came from being dirt poor, as did I.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chrishell-stause/oprah-is-definitely-a-self-made-woman-and-she-came-from-being-dirt/) [Chrishell Stause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chrishell-stause/) > [If "man who supports his family, at all costs, even his own happiness" is Who You Are, then love your work, because it is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neale-donald-walsch/if-man-who-supports-his-family-at-all-costs-even-his-own-happiness-is/) [Neale Donald Walsch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neale-donald-walsch/) > [“A self-made man" - not of woman born but alchemized, through sheer force of will, by the man himself. This is what I want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caitlin-moran/a-self-made-man-not-of-woman-born-but-alchemized-through-sheer-force/) [Caitlin Moran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caitlin-moran/) > [I love Priyanka Chopra mainly because she is a self-made woman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/disha-patani/i-love-priyanka-chopra-mainly-because-she-is-a-self-made-woman/) [Disha Patani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/disha-patani/) > [I'm a Self-made Woman in Every Sense of the Word](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laverne-cox/i-m-a-self-made-woman-in-every-sense-of-the-word/) [Laverne Cox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laverne-cox/) > [I'm a self-made woman. I've never compromised myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nia-long/i-m-a-self-made-woman-i-ve-never-compromised-myself/) [Nia Long](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nia-long/) > [Every girl is beautiful. God made you perfect. You're all beautiful in his eyes. So smile and accept yourself. He loves you and someday…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cuts-and-scars/every-girl-is-beautiful-god-made-you-perfect-you-re-all-beautiful-in/) [Cuts And Scars](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cuts-and-scars/) > [ The perfect woman, you see \[is\] a working-woman; not an idler; not a fine lady; but one who \[uses\] her hands and her head… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/the-perfect-woman-you-see-is-a-working-woman-not-an-idler-not-a-fine/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [The perfect woman is a higher type of humanity than the perfect man, and also something much rarer. The natural history of animals furnishes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/friedrich-nietzsche/the-perfect-woman-is-a-higher-type-of-humanity-than-the-perfect-man/) [Friedrich Nietzsche](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/friedrich-nietzsche/) ## More by Judith M Bardwick > [Self is a construct, a feeling, an identity that is internal and can neither be given nor taken away by others. We develop and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/self-is-a-construct-a-feeling-an-identity-that-is-internal-and-can/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [... we know that productivity suffers when uncertainty is high. But we've failed to realize the equally destructive effects of too little anxiety. ...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/we-know-that-productivity-suffers-when-uncertainty-is-high-but-we-ve/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [Trust is perhaps the most critical single building block underlying effectiveness. Without trust leaders do not have followers. Without trust, leaders are impotent despite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/trust-is-perhaps-the-most-critical-single-building-block-underlying/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [Schools are generally feminine places, institutions where conformity is valued, taught largely by conformist women.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/schools-are-generally-feminine-places-institutions-where-conformity/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [The balanced life is a goal, but for us it is mostly a myth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/the-balanced-life-is-a-goal-but-for-us-it-is-mostly-a-myth/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [Credibility is lost when there are big discrepancies between what leaders say and what they do. ... Increasing credibility requires openness. Hidden agendas will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/credibility-is-lost-when-there-are-big-discrepancies-between-what/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [The sense of loss of control over what happens to you at work (and thus in your life is vital). This further involves a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/the-sense-of-loss-of-control-over-what-happens-to-you-at-work-and/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [Nothing creates more self-respect among employees than being included in the process of making decisions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/nothing-creates-more-self-respect-among-employees-than-being-included/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [I was appalled at how children had become the focus and gravitational center of the nuclear family around which parents orbited instead of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/i-was-appalled-at-how-children-had-become-the-focus-and-gravitational/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [... there's a large core of powerlessness which is balanced against the unwritten contract that says that if you behave, you'll be okay. No…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/there-s-a-large-core-of-powerlessness-which-is-balanced-against-the/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [If the mood is overly anxious, then anxiety must be reduced by lowering uncertainty. Very simply, uncertainty is reduced when people are told what's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/if-the-mood-is-overly-anxious-then-anxiety-must-be-reduced-by/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [The message to organizations is this: You have to increase the number of categories of contributing, or the types of career paths, which people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/the-message-to-organizations-is-this-you-have-to-increase-the-number/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [I think the characteristics of really effective leaders when people are frightened and depressed are the same qualities that leaders need when people are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/i-think-the-characteristics-of-really-effective-leaders-when-people/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [Real confidence comes from knowing and accepting yourself- your strengths and your limitations -in contrast to depending on affirmation from others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/real-confidence-comes-from-knowing-and-accepting-yourself-your/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) > [The need for challenge, the need to burst through the constrictions of tasks and situations already seen and mastered, can affect anyone, even those…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/the-need-for-challenge-the-need-to-burst-through-the-constrictions-of/) [Judith M Bardwick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) [Explore all 37 Judith M Bardwick quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/) ## More Energy quotes > [If there is any period one would desire to be born in, is it not the age of Revolution; when the old and the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ralph-waldo-emerson/if-there-is-any-period-one-would-desire-to-be-born-in-is-it-not-the/) [Ralph Waldo Emerson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ralph-waldo-emerson/) > [By making conscious choices in our behavior and where we focus our attention, we can transform our experience of our body, decrease our biological…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/by-making-conscious-choices-in-our-behavior-and-where-we-focus-our/) [Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/) > [Sport is not just about entertainment. It is equally about winning and losing, pooling and galvanising the energy of the youth, upgrading people's physical…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nita-ambani/sport-is-not-just-about-entertainment-it-is-equally-about-winning-and/) [Nita Ambani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nita-ambani/) > [Performance matters because games are built on great performance, but form factor and energy efficiency matter incredibly because they want to build something that's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jensen-huang/performance-matters-because-games-are-built-on-great-performance-but/) [Jensen Huang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jensen-huang/) > [Energy rests upon love; and come as it will, there's no forcing it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-tolstoy/energy-rests-upon-love-and-come-as-it-will-there-s-no-forcing-it/) [Leo Tolstoy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-tolstoy/) > [Behind every word flows energy. If you use your words to gossip or babble about what you are going to do before you do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sonia-choquette/behind-every-word-flows-energy-if-you-use-your-words-to-gossip-or/) [Sonia Choquette](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sonia-choquette/) > [If you ask another competitor, they may tell you they felt very competitive towards me. But I can tell you that my biggest competition…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-kwan/if-you-ask-another-competitor-they-may-tell-you-they-felt-very/) [Michelle Kwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-kwan/) > [I'm a vegetarian - I think there's a strong possibility, had I not become a vegetarian, I would not be working now. I became…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-barker/i-m-a-vegetarian-i-think-there-s-a-strong-possibility-had-i-not/) [Bob Barker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-barker/) > [An artist's creative energy is ephemeral as a flower. It blooms and soon dies. No artist is great forever. Personally, I think I reached…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kim-ki-duk/an-artist-s-creative-energy-is-ephemeral-as-a-flower-it-blooms-and/) [Kim Ki-duk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kim-ki-duk/) > [Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hopes shine to the stars. Enthusiasm is the sparkle in your eyes, the swing in your gait.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ford/enthusiasm-is-the-yeast-that-makes-your-hopes-shine-to-the-stars/) [Henry Ford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ford/) > [I've never even been into those supplements or any of that. I don't even drink energy shakes. I'm not into that kind of stuff.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-pierce/i-ve-never-even-been-into-those-supplements-or-any-of-that-i-don-t/) [Paul Pierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-pierce/) > [Some would call me an environmentalist. I don't know why. I reuse the water that falls in my backyard in the winter. I reuse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ed-begley-jr/some-would-call-me-an-environmentalist-i-don-t-know-why-i-reuse-the/) [Ed Begley, Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ed-begley-jr/) > [I have lived in countries that were coming out of conflict: Ireland, South Africa, the Czech republic. People there are overflowing with energy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-eno/i-have-lived-in-countries-that-were-coming-out-of-conflict-ireland/) [Brian Eno](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-eno/) > [You know, by the time you reach my age, you've made plenty of mistakes if you've lived your life properly. So you learn. You…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ronald-reagan/you-know-by-the-time-you-reach-my-age-you-ve-made-plenty-of-mistakes/) [Ronald Reagan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ronald-reagan/) > ['The Choirboys' is very much a product of its mid-1970s time, especially in its two-dimensional portrayals of cop groupies Ora Lee and Carolina Moon,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-weinman/the-choirboys-is-very-much-a-product-of-its-mid-1970s-time-especially/) [Sarah Weinman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-weinman/) [Browse all 12,866 Energy quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/energy/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "For most women being other-directed, focused on how other people feel and nurturing them, was (and can still be) a quality that girls were (are) heavily pressured to become. The unselfish or Self-less woman was (is) seen as ideal. The realization and articulation that the cultural ideal of the perfect woman was someone who had no sense of Self and was a key part of the angry energy that drove Feminism to its swift success.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Judith M Bardwick" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/for-most-women-being-other-directed-focused-on-how-other-people-feel/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Energy" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/for-most-women-being-other-directed-focused-on-how-other-people-feel/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/541/judith-m-bardwick-17540_energy_for-most-women-being-other-directed-focu_1781351.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“For most women being other-directed, focused on how other people feel and nurturing them, was (and can still…” — Judith M Bardwick", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Judith M Bardwick", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-m-bardwick/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "For most women being other-directed, focused...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/for-most-women-being-other-directed-focused-on-how-other-people-feel/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-m-bardwick/for-most-women-being-other-directed-focused-on-how-other-people-feel/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```