--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Haven't you got anything humorous that…" description: "\"“Haven't you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? I'd like to keep away from the subject of religion altogether if we..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/836/joseph-heller-601_chaplain_haven-t-you-got-anything-humorous-that-s_770690.jpg" --- # Haven't you got anything humorous that stays away from… ![“Haven't you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? I'd like to keep away from the subject of religion altogether if we can.” The chaplain was apologetic. "I'm sorry, sir, but just about all the prayers I know are rather somber in tone and make at least some passing…” quote by Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/836/joseph-heller-601_chaplain_haven-t-you-got-anything-humorous-that-s_770690.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/836/joseph-heller-601_chaplain_haven-t-you-got-anything-humorous-that-s_770690.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/836/joseph-heller-601_chaplain_haven-t-you-got-anything-humorous-that-s_770690.jpg) > ““Haven't you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? I'd like to keep away from the subject of religion altogether if we can.” The chaplain was apologetic. "I'm sorry, sir, but just about all the prayers I know are rather somber in tone and make at least some passing reference to God.”” [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The chaplain admits most prayers are somber and reference God, highlighting discomfort with religious humor. **In simple terms:** Prayers often sound serious and mention God. Key Takeaway Seek humor beyond religious contexts. Themes humor religion discomfort communication Mood wry thoughtful Type satirical conversational When to use this quote - social gatherings - interfaith dialogue - writing workshops - public speaking Key Concepts satire existentialism Questions to Reflect On - How can you balance humor and respect? - When is religious satire appropriate? A Different Perspective Humor can alienate believers; sensitivity needed. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Altogether Chaplain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/altogether-chaplain-5958225/) [Chaplain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/chaplain/) [Chaplain Apologetic](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/chaplain-apologetic-5958224/) [Humor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/) [Public-prayer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/public-prayer-151159/) [Reference God](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reference-god-1896490/) [Religion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/religion/) [Somber Tone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/somber-tone-5958226/) ## Related quotes > [“My 'morals' were sound, even a bit puritanic, but when a hidebound old deacon inveighed against dancing I rebelled. By the time of graduation…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-e-b-du-bois-2/my-morals-were-sound-even-a-bit-puritanic-but-when-a-hidebound-old/) [W.E.B. Du Bois](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-e-b-du-bois-2/) > [“It was love at first sight. The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in love with him.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/it-was-love-at-first-sight-the-first-time-yossarian-saw-the-chaplain/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“The chaplain glanced at the bridge table that served as his desk and saw only the abominable orange-red, pear-shaped, plum tomato he had obtained…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/the-chaplain-glanced-at-the-bridge-table-that-served-as-his-desk-and/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“The chaplain had mastered, in a moment of divine intuition, the handy technique of protective rationalization, and he was exhilarated by his discovery. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/the-chaplain-had-mastered-in-a-moment-of-divine-intuition-the-handy/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“It isn't necessary to call me Father, the chaplain explained. I'm an Anabaptist.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/it-isn-t-necessary-to-call-me-father-the-chaplain-explained-i-m-an/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [ “…\[E\]veryone knew that sin was evil, and that no good could come from evil. But he did feel good; he felt positively marvellous. 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He concluded that without God in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-sherman/king-solomon-set-out-on-a-course-to-work-and-live-without-reference/) [Doug Sherman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-sherman/) > [I don't think it's cool for people to say, 'You shouldn't reference God because I don't believe that, and I don't want to hear…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-harvey/i-don-t-think-it-s-cool-for-people-to-say-you-shouldn-t-reference-god/) [Steve Harvey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-harvey/) > [“Much later, I checked out the Ten Commandments of the Abrahamic religions. You know how many of them contain a reference to God? About…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/masaji-ishikawa/much-later-i-checked-out-the-ten-commandments-of-the-abrahamic/) [Masaji Ishikawa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/masaji-ishikawa/) > [“God and God alone is the final, ultimate goal of our quest. All that God is for us in Jesus is the Object of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-piper/god-and-god-alone-is-the-final-ultimate-goal-of-our-quest-all-that/) [John Piper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-piper/) > [There's a Chaplain who never visited the front.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/there-s-a-chaplain-who-never-visited-the-front/) [Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/) > [“Private Hott is with God now—or wherever people go after they die,” says Enoch “You can call me Brother” Root. “What kind of an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neal-stephenson/private-hott-is-with-god-now-or-wherever-people-go-after-they-die/) [Neal Stephenson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neal-stephenson/) > [He that preaches war is the devil's chaplain.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ray/he-that-preaches-war-is-the-devil-s-chaplain/) [John Ray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ray/) ## More by Joseph Heller > [“Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle. "That's some catch, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/yossarian-was-moved-very-deeply-by-the-absolute-simplicity-of-this/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/from-men-motivated-by-moral-certitude-history-teaches-no-lasting-good/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [I’m cold,' Snowden said softly, 'I’m cold.' 'You’re going to be all right, kid,' Yossarian reassured him with a grin. 'You’re going to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/i-m-cold-snowden-said-softly-i-m-cold-you-re-going-to-be-all-right/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/the-enemy-is-anybody-who-s-going-to-get-you-killed-no-matter-which/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“They think that they’re smart and that the rest of us are dumb.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/they-think-that-they-re-smart-and-that-the-rest-of-us-are-dumb/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's safety in the face of dangers that were…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/there-was-only-one-catch-and-that-was-catch-22-which-specified-that-a/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“Captain Flume was obsessed with the idea that Chief White Halfoat would tiptoe up to his cot one night when he was sound asleep…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/captain-flume-was-obsessed-with-the-idea-that-chief-white-halfoat/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“Depreciating motels, junked automobiles, and quick-food joints grow like amber waves of grain.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/depreciating-motels-junked-automobiles-and-quick-food-joints-grow/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“That was where he wanted to be if he had to be there at all, instead of hung out there in front like some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/that-was-where-he-wanted-to-be-if-he-had-to-be-there-at-all-instead/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/i-had-examined-myself-pretty-thoroughly-and-discovered-that-i-was/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“Yossarian was moved by such intense pity for his poverty that he wanted to smash his pale. sad, sickly face with his fist and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/yossarian-was-moved-by-such-intense-pity-for-his-poverty-that-he/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [You have deep-seated survival anxieties. And you don't like bigots, bullies, snobs or hypocrites. Subconsciously there are many people you hate." "Consciously, sir, consciously,"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/you-have-deep-seated-survival-anxieties-and-you-don-t-like-bigots/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“His specialty was alfalfa, and he made a good thing out of not growing any. The government paid him well for every bushel of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/his-specialty-was-alfalfa-and-he-made-a-good-thing-out-of-not-growing/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [Every writer I know has trouble writing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/every-writer-i-know-has-trouble-writing/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“No such private nights of ecstasy or hushed-up drinking and sex orgies ever occurred. They might have occurred if either General Dreedle or General…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/no-such-private-nights-of-ecstasy-or-hushed-up-drinking-and-sex/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) [Explore all 420 Joseph Heller quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) ## More Chaplain quotes > [He that preaches war is the devil's chaplain.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ray/he-that-preaches-war-is-the-devil-s-chaplain/) [John Ray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ray/) > [“Private Hott is with God now—or wherever people go after they die,” says Enoch “You can call me Brother” Root. “What kind of an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neal-stephenson/private-hott-is-with-god-now-or-wherever-people-go-after-they-die/) [Neal Stephenson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neal-stephenson/) > [There's a Chaplain who never visited the front.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/there-s-a-chaplain-who-never-visited-the-front/) [Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/) > [“How wicked it would be, if we could, to call the dead back! She said not to me but to the chaplain, 'I am…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/c-s-lewis-2/how-wicked-it-would-be-if-we-could-to-call-the-dead-back-she-said-not/) [C.S. Lewis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/c-s-lewis-2/) > [“Christ came to take away our sins, not our minds.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-sloane-coffin/christ-came-to-take-away-our-sins-not-our-minds/) [William Sloane Coffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-sloane-coffin/) > [“I think it was so splendid in Father to go as a chaplain when he was too old to be drafted, and not strong…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louisa-may-alcott/i-think-it-was-so-splendid-in-father-to-go-as-a-chaplain-when-he-was/) [Louisa May Alcott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louisa-may-alcott/) > [“The chaplain has a good life, an easy life. He is well educated, modestly well-to-do, and awkwardly handsome. He has faced no particularly compelling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/the-chaplain-has-a-good-life-an-easy-life-he-is-well-educated/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“It isn't necessary to call me Father, the chaplain explained. I'm an Anabaptist.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/it-isn-t-necessary-to-call-me-father-the-chaplain-explained-i-m-an/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“When I moved back home to northwest Florida after being a cop and a cleric in Atlanta, I never would’ve imagined I’d become a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-lister/when-i-moved-back-home-to-northwest-florida-after-being-a-cop-and-a/) [Michael Lister](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-lister/) > [ “…\[E\]veryone knew that sin was evil, and that no good could come from evil. But he did feel good; he felt positively marvellous. Consequently,… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/e-veryone-knew-that-sin-was-evil-and-that-no-good-could-come-from/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [“It was love at first sight. The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in love with him.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/it-was-love-at-first-sight-the-first-time-yossarian-saw-the-chaplain/) [Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/) > [An atheist chaplain would be the perfect vehicle for convincing wounded warriors that they should end their lives because there's nothing in the future…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gordon-klingenschmitt/an-atheist-chaplain-would-be-the-perfect-vehicle-for-convincing/) [Gordon Klingenschmitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gordon-klingenschmitt/) > [A chaplain's assistant is customarily a figure of fun in the American Army.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kurt-vonnegut/a-chaplain-s-assistant-is-customarily-a-figure-of-fun-in-the-american/) [Kurt Vonnegut](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kurt-vonnegut/) > [I realized during my time as a chaplain that I didn't want to be a minister.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-realized-during-my-time-as-a-chaplain-that-i-didn-t-want-to-be-a/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I don't think ministering requires a religious context. The number one thing is that every parent is extremely worried about their kid. Of course,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-don-t-think-ministering-requires-a-religious-context-the-number-one/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Browse all 30 Chaplain quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/chaplain/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Haven't you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? 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