--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: To my younger self, I would say unless…" description: "\"To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in danger, ask forgiveness instead of asking permission.\" — Jonathan Van Ness" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg" --- # To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in… ![“To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in danger, ask forgiveness instead of asking permission.” quote by Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg) > “To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in danger, ask forgiveness instead of asking permission.” [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Advocates taking bold action when risk is low, seeking forgiveness over permission. **In simple terms:** Ask for forgiveness when safe, not permission. Key Takeaway Act boldly when risk is minimal. Themes courage risk management initiative Mood determined confident Type advice motivational When to use this quote - career decisions - creative projects - social activism - personal relationships Key Concepts Ethics personal agency Questions to Reflect On - When have you chosen permission over forgiveness? - What risks are truly low? A Different Perspective May overlook consequences of reckless behavior. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Ask Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ask-forgiveness/) [Asking permission](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asking-permission/) [Danger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/danger/) [Danger Ask](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/danger-ask-2214421/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Forgiveness Instead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness-instead-2214422/) [Literally](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/literally/) [Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self/) [Younger self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/younger-self/) ## Related quotes > [My father said he was going to write to the Jinzhou City Party Committee asking for permission to 'talk about love'...My mother supposed it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jung-chang/my-father-said-he-was-going-to-write-to-the-jinzhou-city-party/) [Jung Chang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jung-chang/) > [“Livia, I’m here to say it’s okay. It’s okay if you want to leave, live a normal life, have a husband with a great…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debra-anastasia/livia-i-m-here-to-say-it-s-okay-it-s-okay-if-you-want-to-leave-live-a/) [Debra Anastasia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debra-anastasia/) > [“You're not asking me for advice, you're asking me for permission.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-maraboli/you-re-not-asking-me-for-advice-you-re-asking-me-for-permission/) [Steve Maraboli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-maraboli/) > [Can I cut off your head?" "Are you asking for my permission?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amanda-hocking/can-i-cut-off-your-head-are-you-asking-for-my-permission/) [Amanda Hocking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amanda-hocking/) > [If you want to send a manuscript, send it to an agent. And send a letter first, asking permission. Launch it into the real…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-pressfield/if-you-want-to-send-a-manuscript-send-it-to-an-agent-and-send-a/) [Steven Pressfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-pressfield/) > [The thing I hate most in acting is asking permission to do things. What you really want to do is say, 'This is my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lance-henriksen/the-thing-i-hate-most-in-acting-is-asking-permission-to-do-things/) [Lance Henriksen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lance-henriksen/) > [Do not smoke without asking permission or sit so near (as in a train) that the smoke might annoy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-vanderbilt/do-not-smoke-without-asking-permission-or-sit-so-near-as-in-a-train/) [Amy Vanderbilt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-vanderbilt/) > [Change isn't made by asking permission. Change is made by asking forgiveness, later.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-godin/change-isn-t-made-by-asking-permission-change-is-made-by-asking/) [Seth Godin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-godin/) > [“I’m not asking your permission, Lily. This is how it’ll be. I won’t accept a small part of you anymore. I’ll own all of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dosher/i-m-not-asking-your-permission-lily-this-is-how-it-ll-be-i-won-t/) [Sarah Dosher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dosher/) > [“Between asking permission and begging forgiveness, I lean toward the latter.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becca-fitzpatrick/between-asking-permission-and-begging-forgiveness-i-lean-toward-the/) [Becca Fitzpatrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/becca-fitzpatrick/) > [If you want to live a great life, stop asking everyone else for permission. Stop seeking to live up to other people's expectations, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/unkown/if-you-want-to-live-a-great-life-stop-asking-everyone-else-for/) [Unkown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/unkown/) > [“The schizo knows how to leave: he has made departure into something as simple as being born or dying. But at the same time…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deleuze-guattari/the-schizo-knows-how-to-leave-he-has-made-departure-into-something-as/) [Deleuze Guattari](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deleuze-guattari/) > [“John turned to me. "Frozen daiquiri?" "Pina colada, please." "Virgin?" He wasn't asking my permission. He was just making sure I knew he wasn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-echols/john-turned-to-me-frozen-daiquiri-pina-colada-please-virgin-he-wasn-t/) [Jennifer Echols](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-echols/) > [The United States could transform its property tax system into a progressive tax on net worth without asking permission to the rest of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-piketty/the-united-states-could-transform-its-property-tax-system-into-a/) [Thomas Piketty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-piketty/) > [“The human memory is such a cruel, frustrating thing, the way it just discards things without asking permission, precious things.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-jewell/the-human-memory-is-such-a-cruel-frustrating-thing-the-way-it-just/) [Lisa Jewell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-jewell/) ## More by Jonathan Van Ness > [Even though I'm a hairdresser and I love doing hair, I feel like I don't look like a groomer. When I think of how…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/even-though-i-m-a-hairdresser-and-i-love-doing-hair-i-feel-like-i-don/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [If I could only have one grooming tool, it would be floss. I don't want to have broken Cheetos in my teeth. To protect…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/if-i-could-only-have-one-grooming-tool-it-would-be-floss-i-don-t-want/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [One of my closest friends is a trans man who is incredible. And a lot of my clients are trans women.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/one-of-my-closest-friends-is-a-trans-man-who-is-incredible-and-a-lot/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I think that because I struggled and did get very bullied, that definitely made me learn how to be funny and let things roll…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-think-that-because-i-struggled-and-did-get-very-bullied-that/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [Typically, you're not gonna find me out at night; I don't go to industry parties. Like, I will go sometimes if I'm invited, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/typically-you-re-not-gonna-find-me-out-at-night-i-don-t-go-to/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [My biggest secret is that I don't over-wash my hair. I wash it twice a week at the most, unless I'm on set every…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/my-biggest-secret-is-that-i-don-t-over-wash-my-hair-i-wash-it-twice-a/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [God, I miss TLC.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/god-i-miss-tlc/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [If you're feeling a little down, you're never fully dressed without a strong heel. But only if you're depressed - if you need a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/if-you-re-feeling-a-little-down-you-re-never-fully-dressed-without-a/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [Coming from a town of 30,000 people on the Mississippi River, having 'Queer Eye' in 2003 through 2007 when I was in high school was really important.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/coming-from-a-town-of-30-000-people-on-the-mississippi-river-having/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I think that the ideal of men's physiques in general, gay or straight, is one of the most under-talked-about things ever. Ninety-five percent of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-think-that-the-ideal-of-men-s-physiques-in-general-gay-or-straight/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I used to be pretty hard on myself, like, if I didn't like a haircut I did on someone, I would think about it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-used-to-be-pretty-hard-on-myself-like-if-i-didn-t-like-a-haircut-i/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I went from being pretty fit to 230 lbs., which isn't, like, the biggest for being 6-feet-tall, but I had been 165 lbs. just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-went-from-being-pretty-fit-to-230-lbs-which-isn-t-like-the-biggest/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [So often, grooming is meant to make you feel better about yourself, and a lot of times, we use it to make ourselves feel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/so-often-grooming-is-meant-to-make-you-feel-better-about-yourself-and/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I remember saying I wanted to be a cosmetologist when I was really young.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-remember-saying-i-wanted-to-be-a-cosmetologist-when-i-was-really/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) > [I've worn a 100% polyester cheerleading outfit in stadiums full of people - it is pretty hard to embarrass me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/i-ve-worn-a-100-polyester-cheerleading-outfit-in-stadiums-full-of/) [Jonathan Van Ness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) [Explore all 98 Jonathan Van Ness quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/) ## More Asking permission quotes > [My father said he was going to write to the Jinzhou City Party Committee asking for permission to 'talk about love'...My mother supposed it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jung-chang/my-father-said-he-was-going-to-write-to-the-jinzhou-city-party/) [Jung Chang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jung-chang/) > [The United States could transform its property tax system into a progressive tax on net worth without asking permission to the rest of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-piketty/the-united-states-could-transform-its-property-tax-system-into-a/) [Thomas Piketty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-piketty/) > [“John turned to me. "Frozen daiquiri?" "Pina colada, please." "Virgin?" He wasn't asking my permission. He was just making sure I knew he wasn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-echols/john-turned-to-me-frozen-daiquiri-pina-colada-please-virgin-he-wasn-t/) [Jennifer Echols](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-echols/) > [“The schizo knows how to leave: he has made departure into something as simple as being born or dying. But at the same time…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deleuze-guattari/the-schizo-knows-how-to-leave-he-has-made-departure-into-something-as/) [Deleuze Guattari](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deleuze-guattari/) > [If you want to live a great life, stop asking everyone else for permission. Stop seeking to live up to other people's expectations, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/unkown/if-you-want-to-live-a-great-life-stop-asking-everyone-else-for/) [Unkown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/unkown/) > [“Between asking permission and begging forgiveness, I lean toward the latter.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becca-fitzpatrick/between-asking-permission-and-begging-forgiveness-i-lean-toward-the/) [Becca Fitzpatrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/becca-fitzpatrick/) > [“I’m not asking your permission, Lily. This is how it’ll be. I won’t accept a small part of you anymore. I’ll own all of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dosher/i-m-not-asking-your-permission-lily-this-is-how-it-ll-be-i-won-t/) [Sarah Dosher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dosher/) > [Change isn't made by asking permission. Change is made by asking forgiveness, later.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-godin/change-isn-t-made-by-asking-permission-change-is-made-by-asking/) [Seth Godin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-godin/) > [Do not smoke without asking permission or sit so near (as in a train) that the smoke might annoy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-vanderbilt/do-not-smoke-without-asking-permission-or-sit-so-near-as-in-a-train/) [Amy Vanderbilt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-vanderbilt/) > [The thing I hate most in acting is asking permission to do things. What you really want to do is say, 'This is my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lance-henriksen/the-thing-i-hate-most-in-acting-is-asking-permission-to-do-things/) [Lance Henriksen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lance-henriksen/) > [If you want to send a manuscript, send it to an agent. And send a letter first, asking permission. Launch it into the real…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-pressfield/if-you-want-to-send-a-manuscript-send-it-to-an-agent-and-send-a/) [Steven Pressfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-pressfield/) > [Can I cut off your head?" "Are you asking for my permission?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amanda-hocking/can-i-cut-off-your-head-are-you-asking-for-my-permission/) [Amanda Hocking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amanda-hocking/) > [“You're not asking me for advice, you're asking me for permission.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-maraboli/you-re-not-asking-me-for-advice-you-re-asking-me-for-permission/) [Steve Maraboli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-maraboli/) > [“Livia, I’m here to say it’s okay. It’s okay if you want to leave, live a normal life, have a husband with a great…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debra-anastasia/livia-i-m-here-to-say-it-s-okay-it-s-okay-if-you-want-to-leave-live-a/) [Debra Anastasia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debra-anastasia/) > [“The human memory is such a cruel, frustrating thing, the way it just discards things without asking permission, precious things.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-jewell/the-human-memory-is-such-a-cruel-frustrating-thing-the-way-it-just/) [Lisa Jewell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-jewell/) [Browse all 40 Asking permission quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asking-permission/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in danger, ask forgiveness instead of asking permission.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jonathan Van Ness" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-you-re-literally-in-danger-ask/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Asking permission" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-you-re-literally-in-danger-ask/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/609/jonathan-van-ness-6662_asking-permission_to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-yo_2634038.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“To my younger self, I would say unless you're literally in danger, ask forgiveness instead of asking…” — Jonathan Van Ness", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jonathan Van Ness", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-van-ness/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "To my younger self, I would...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-you-re-literally-in-danger-ask/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-van-ness/to-my-younger-self-i-would-say-unless-you-re-literally-in-danger-ask/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```