---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The wanting, the needing, the distance…"
description: "\"“The wanting, the needing, the distance, the disappointment: growing, knowing, committing, aging beside another. Alone, one can live perfectly. But not..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png"
---

#  The wanting, the needing, the distance, the…

![“The wanting, the needing, the distance, the disappointment: growing, knowing, committing, aging beside another. Alone, one can live perfectly. But not a life.” quote by Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png)

> ““The wanting, the needing, the distance, the disappointment: growing, knowing, committing, aging beside another. Alone, one can live perfectly. But not a life.””

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Balancing intimacy and independence; togetherness brings fulfillment but also vulnerability.

**In simple terms:** Being with others enriches life but also brings challenges.

Key Takeaway

Value both connection and self-sufficiency.

Themes

relationships loneliness dependence growth

Mood

reflective thoughtful

Type

philosophical inspirational

When to use this quote

- marriage
- friendships
- collaborative projects
- family life

Key Concepts

interdependence personal fulfillment

Questions to Reflect On

- What compromises are you willing to make for partnership?
- How do you maintain individuality in close relationships?

A Different Perspective

Alone can be ideal but lacks shared meaning.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/)

## Related quotes

> [Theres a difference between wanting &amp; needing. I want you, but sure dont need you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/theres-a-difference-between-wanting-needing-i-want-you-but-sure-dont/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Wanting and needing have two very different s meanings some people still seem to not figure that out.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arjun-loveable/wanting-and-needing-have-two-very-different-s-meanings-some-people/)

[Arjun Loveable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arjun-loveable/)

> [Wanting and needing are two different things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richelle-mead/wanting-and-needing-are-two-different-things/)

[Richelle Mead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richelle-mead/)

> [“Wanting someone, needing someone, isn't a vice.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvain-reynard/wanting-someone-needing-someone-isn-t-a-vice/)

[Sylvain Reynard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvain-reynard/)

> [If you have it you don't need it. If you need it, you don't have it. If you have it, you need more of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bruce-campbell/if-you-have-it-you-don-t-need-it-if-you-need-it-you-don-t-have-it-if/)

[Bruce Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bruce-campbell/)

> [Why God should want and need us is a mystery. But it is true: otherwise he would not have created us and life would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/why-god-should-want-and-need-us-is-a-mystery-but-it-is-true-otherwise/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“What he wanted was Megan wanting him... but not needing him. Not vulnerable to him. Sure as help not trying to leave him over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mira-lyn-kelly/what-he-wanted-was-megan-wanting-him-but-not-needing-him-not/)

[Mira Lyn Kelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mira-lyn-kelly/)

> [“The experiences of wanting less, needing less, and giving more allow us to withdraw from the psychic conflicts that cause so much pain for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gideon-lewis-kraus/the-experiences-of-wanting-less-needing-less-and-giving-more-allow-us/)

[Gideon Lewis-Kraus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gideon-lewis-kraus/)

> [People never get what they want never get what they need we get what we are so stop wanting and needing and start being](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ekhert-tolle-kid-white/people-never-get-what-they-want-never-get-what-they-need-we-get-what/)

Ekhert Tolle / Kid White

> [“Nicholas gave her a pained look. "Wanting someone, needing someone, isn't a vice.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvain-reynard/nicholas-gave-her-a-pained-look-wanting-someone-needing-someone-isn-t/)

[Sylvain Reynard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvain-reynard/)

> [The state of love is this constant flux back and forth between who's saving and who's rescuing, who's wanting and not wanting, who's needing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-alison/the-state-of-love-is-this-constant-flux-back-and-forth-between-who-s/)

[Jane Alison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-alison/)

> [I started off singing when I was little. My parents have said I was singing at 3 years old. So I think it was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brooke-elliott/i-started-off-singing-when-i-was-little-my-parents-have-said-i-was/)

[Brooke Elliott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brooke-elliott/)

> [Almost always when I told someone I was writing a book about "eating animals", they assumed, even without knowing anything about my views, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/almost-always-when-i-told-someone-i-was-writing-a-book-about-eating/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [When you lose someone, don't take it as a bad thing, see it as in you don't need them no longer, they were just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leanne/when-you-lose-someone-don-t-take-it-as-a-bad-thing-see-it-as-in-you/)

[Leanne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leanne/)

> [“this is what i never allow myself to need. and of course i've been needing it all along.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-levithan-john-green/this-is-what-i-never-allow-myself-to-need-and-of-course-i-ve-been/)

David Levithan John Green

## More by Jonathan Safran Foer

> [This brings me back to the image of Kafka standing before a fish in the Berlin aquarium, a fish on which his gaze fell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/this-brings-me-back-to-the-image-of-kafka-standing-before-a-fish-in/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [I try not to remember the life that I didn’t want to lose but lost and have to remember](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/i-try-not-to-remember-the-life-that-i-didn-t-want-to-lose-but-lost/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“I have an aristocratic smile and like to punch people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/i-have-an-aristocratic-smile-and-like-to-punch-people/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [He removed several pages of death certificates, which were picked up by another breeze and sent into the trees. Some would fall with the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/he-removed-several-pages-of-death-certificates-which-were-picked-up/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [I would have done anything for him. Maybe that was my sickness. We made love in nothing places and turned the lights off. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/i-would-have-done-anything-for-him-maybe-that-was-my-sickness-we-made/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“One day I wandered away from her and hid. I liked the way it felt to have someone look for me, to hear my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/one-day-i-wandered-away-from-her-and-hid-i-liked-the-way-it-felt-to/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [If nothing matters, there's nothing to save.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/if-nothing-matters-there-s-nothing-to-save/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“It was one of the best days of my life, a day during which I lived my life and didn't think about it at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/it-was-one-of-the-best-days-of-my-life-a-day-during-which-i-lived-my/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“The appearance was misleading- human dreams; rubbish heaps abundant yet ephemeral sudden and splendid, only to wilt and perish”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-appearance-was-misleading-human-dreams-rubbish-heaps-abundant-yet/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“the entirety of human society and moral progress represents an explicit transcendence of what’s “natural.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-entirety-of-human-society-and-moral-progress-represents-an/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“Food is not so much a symbol of freedom as the first requirement of freedom. We eat foods that are native to America on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/food-is-not-so-much-a-symbol-of-freedom-as-the-first-requirement-of/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [“Rationally, factory farming is so obviously wrong, in so many ways. In all of my reading and conversations, I’ve yet to find a credible…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/rationally-factory-farming-is-so-obviously-wrong-in-so-many-ways-in/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [Just because you're an atheist, that doesn't mean you wouldn't love for things to have reasons for why they are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/just-because-you-re-an-atheist-that-doesn-t-mean-you-wouldn-t-love/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [Do you think I'm wonderful? she asked him one day as they leaned against the trunk of a petrified maple. No, he said. Why?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/do-you-think-i-m-wonderful-she-asked-him-one-day-as-they-leaned/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

> [My insides don't match up with my outsides. -Do anyone's inside and outsides match up? -I don't know. I'm only me. -Maybe that's what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/my-insides-don-t-match-up-with-my-outsides-do-anyone-s-inside-and/)

[Jonathan Safran Foer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

[Explore all 1,117 Jonathan Safran Foer quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/)

## More Knowing quotes

> [I certainly do care for you Jeff Campbell less than you are always thinking and much more than you are ever knowing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gertrude-stein/i-certainly-do-care-for-you-jeff-campbell-less-than-you-are-always/)

[Gertrude Stein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gertrude-stein/)

> [I have lifted my plane . . . for perhaps a thousand flights and I have never felt her wheels glide from the Earth…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beryl-markham/i-have-lifted-my-plane-for-perhaps-a-thousand-flights-and-i-have/)

[Beryl Markham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beryl-markham/)

> [Therefore, brethren, pray until God gives us revelation so that "knowing this" in our spirit we may truly confess "that our old man has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/watchman-nee/therefore-brethren-pray-until-god-gives-us-revelation-so-that-knowing/)

[Watchman Nee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/watchman-nee/)

> [The path I choose through the maze makes me what I am. I am not only a thing, but also a way of being--one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-keyes/the-path-i-choose-through-the-maze-makes-me-what-i-am-i-am-not-only-a/)

[Daniel Keyes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-keyes/)

> [Knowing does not always allow us to prevent, but at least the things that we know, we hold them, if not in our hands,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcel-proust/knowing-does-not-always-allow-us-to-prevent-but-at-least-the-things/)

[Marcel Proust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcel-proust/)

> [Life and death were so unpredictable. So close to each other. We existed moment to moment, never knowing who would be the next to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richelle-mead/life-and-death-were-so-unpredictable-so-close-to-each-other-we/)

[Richelle Mead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richelle-mead/)

> [If you don't plan to live the Christian life totally committed to knowing your God and to walking in obedience to Him, then don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kay-arthur/if-you-don-t-plan-to-live-the-christian-life-totally-committed-to/)

[Kay Arthur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kay-arthur/)

> [The individual, by means of the discipline imposed on him by sport, not only plays and finds relaxation from the various compulsions to which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacques-ellul/the-individual-by-means-of-the-discipline-imposed-on-him-by-sport-not/)

[Jacques Ellul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacques-ellul/)

> [I love feeling loved. I don't love knowing that I will always come in second place. I love the fact that at least sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/i-love-feeling-loved-i-don-t-love-knowing-that-i-will-always-come-in/)

[Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/)

> [The happy ending is hardly important, though we may be glad its there. The real joy is knowing that if you felt the trouble…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lynda-barry/the-happy-ending-is-hardly-important-though-we-may-be-glad-its-there/)

[Lynda Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lynda-barry/)

> [They have no right to complain! If women were cool with knowing their man is cheating on them then they have no right to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-williams/they-have-no-right-to-complain-if-women-were-cool-with-knowing-their/)

[Eric Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-williams/)

> [Those who are the most happy appear to know it the least; happiness is something that for the most part seems to mainly consist…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joyce-brothers/those-who-are-the-most-happy-appear-to-know-it-the-least-happiness-is/)

[Joyce Brothers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joyce-brothers/)

> [So few men are really worth knowing, that it seems a shameful waste to let an anthropoid prejudice stand in the way of free…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-l-mencken/so-few-men-are-really-worth-knowing-that-it-seems-a-shameful-waste-to/)

[H. L. Mencken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-l-mencken/)

> [Trying to find this industry's tendency to celebrate the physical is a waste of time. So I'm happy to play the game. But I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olivia-wilde/trying-to-find-this-industry-s-tendency-to-celebrate-the-physical-is/)

[Olivia Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olivia-wilde/)

> [Without the way, there is no going; without the truth, there is no knowing; without the life, there is no living.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/without-the-way-there-is-no-going-without-the-truth-there-is-no/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

Browse all 7,350 Knowing quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“The wanting, the needing, the distance, the disappointment: growing, knowing, committing, aging beside another. Alone, one can live perfectly. But not a life.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Jonathan Safran Foer"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the-disappointment-growing/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Knowing"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the-disappointment-growing/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33e/jonathan-safran-foer-136_knowing_the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the_2415168.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“The wanting, the needing, the distance, the disappointment: growing, knowing, committing, aging beside…” — Jonathan Safran Foer",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Jonathan Safran Foer",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jonathan-safran-foer/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“The wanting, the needing, the distance,...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the-disappointment-growing/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jonathan-safran-foer/the-wanting-the-needing-the-distance-the-disappointment-growing/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
