--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: How long have you been dating her?' I…" description: "\"“How long have you been dating her?' I asked. Nine months. We never got along. I mean, I didn't even briefly like her. Like, my mom and my dad- my dad ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/599/john-green-12_bad-boy_how-long-have-you-been-dating-her-i-aske_163515.jpg" --- # How long have you been dating her?' I asked. Nine months… ![“How long have you been dating her?' I asked. Nine months. We never got along. I mean, I didn't even briefly like her. Like, my mom and my dad- my dad would get pissed, and then he would beat the shit out of my mom. And then my dad would be all nice and they'd have a honeymoon period. But with…” quote by John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/599/john-green-12_bad-boy_how-long-have-you-been-dating-her-i-aske_163515.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/599/john-green-12_bad-boy_how-long-have-you-been-dating-her-i-aske_163515.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/599/john-green-12_bad-boy_how-long-have-you-been-dating-her-i-aske_163515.jpg) > ““How long have you been dating her?' I asked. Nine months. We never got along. I mean, I didn't even briefly like her. Like, my mom and my dad- my dad would get pissed, and then he would beat the shit out of my mom. And then my dad would be all nice and they'd have a honeymoon period. But with Sara, there's never a honeymoon period. God, how could she think I was a rat? I know, I know: Why don't we break up?' He ran a hand through his hair, clutching a fistful of it atop his head, and said, ' I guess I saty with her because she stays with me. And that's not an easy thing to do. I'm a bad boyfriend. She's a bad girlfriend. We deserve each other.”” [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A couple stays together despite mutual dislike because they feel trapped and see no easier alternative, reflecting a toxic, codependent dynamic. **In simple terms:** They stay together because they feel stuck and see no better option. Key Takeaway Recognize unhealthy patterns and seek healthier alternatives. Themes relationships codependency toxicity conflict selfawareness Mood conflicted melancholy reflective Type advice psychological relationship When to use this quote - breakup - counseling - personal growth - self‑reflection Key Concepts emotional manipulation psychological dependence relationship dynamics Questions to Reflect On - What would change if you chose to leave? - How does fear of being alone influence staying? A Different Perspective Staying together may perpetuate harm and prevent personal growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Bad boy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-boy/) [Bad boyfriend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-boyfriend/) [Bad girl](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-girl/) [Girlfriend](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/girlfriend/) [Nine months](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nine-months/) ## Related quotes > [I'm a bad boyfriend. She's a bad girlfriend. We deserve each other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-m-a-bad-boyfriend-she-s-a-bad-girlfriend-we-deserve-each-other/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“I guess I stay with her because she stays with me. And that's not an easy thing to do. I'm a bad boyfriend. She's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-guess-i-stay-with-her-because-she-stays-with-me-and-that-s-not-an/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [.To all the daughters, as your Mom gets older and says or does something you dont like..dont turn your back on us like we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-j/to-all-the-daughters-as-your-mom-gets-older-and-says-or-does/) Nancy J > [I want to fall in love, I think. I've never. I know. Everyone I know's been in love or in relationships now and... There's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cara-delevingne/i-want-to-fall-in-love-i-think-i-ve-never-i-know-everyone-i-know-s/) [Cara Delevingne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cara-delevingne/) > [To know other people thought he'd made a mistake vindicated me. I wasn't a bad girlfriend, he was simply going through a period of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-koomson/to-know-other-people-thought-he-d-made-a-mistake-vindicated-me-i-wasn/) [Dorothy Koomson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-koomson/) > [“And this bad-boy boyfriend?” “Bad boy?” “Yeah. The type you apparently avoid now.” Oh, right.” I laugh. It’s one single bark of bitterness. “Ummm,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-leighton/and-this-bad-boy-boyfriend-bad-boy-yeah-the-type-you-apparently-avoid/) [M. Leighton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-leighton/) > [You're gonna have bad boyfriends and best friends-turned-enemies. You need to be yourself, you need to work hard, and you'll get there. -Lauren Conrad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-conrad/you-re-gonna-have-bad-boyfriends-and-best-friends-turned-enemies-you/) [Lauren Conrad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-conrad/) > ['Firelight' is a beautiful story about a lot of young women. My character, Caroline, is a girl who has a bad boyfriend, and he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/q-orianka-kilcher/firelight-is-a-beautiful-story-about-a-lot-of-young-women-my/) [Q'orianka Kilcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/q-orianka-kilcher/) > [I started my career, actually, maybe the first 10, 11 years, playing the bad boyfriend with the gun. And I got ill with that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/billy-burke/i-started-my-career-actually-maybe-the-first-10-11-years-playing-the/) [Billy Burke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/billy-burke/) > [Writing music is such a freeing exercise, and it's really nice to play in that world of being confident, vengeful - getting back at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gin-wigmore/writing-music-is-such-a-freeing-exercise-and-it-s-really-nice-to-play/) [Gin Wigmore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gin-wigmore/) > [It only takes one bad boyfriend to realize that you deserve so much more.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-only-takes-one-bad-boyfriend-to-realize-that-you-deserve-so-much/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [A bad boyfriend is someone you give everything to - you live with him, cook for him, sleep with him - thinking he is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mika-brzezinski/a-bad-boyfriend-is-someone-you-give-everything-to-you-live-with-him/) [Mika Brzezinski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mika-brzezinski/) > [It's about empowering girls, You're gonna have bad boyfriends and best friends-turned-enemies. You need to be yourself, you need to work hard, and you'll…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-conrad/it-s-about-empowering-girls-you-re-gonna-have-bad-boyfriends-and-best/) [Lauren Conrad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-conrad/) > [“She'd liked Pearl. Pearl hadn't meant to Tazer Archie. Well, she meant to Tazer him, but how was she supposed to know that her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chelsea-cain/she-d-liked-pearl-pearl-hadn-t-meant-to-tazer-archie-well-she-meant/) [Chelsea Cain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chelsea-cain/) > [“But my best friend from college was silent for a long time. She, of all of my friends, had seen the parade of sad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-groff/but-my-best-friend-from-college-was-silent-for-a-long-time-she-of-all/) [Lauren Groff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-groff/) ## More by John Green > [Issac:"I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters." Computer: "I don't understand-" Issac: "Me neither. Pause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/issac-i-dislike-living-in-a-world-without-augustus-waters-computer-i/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“I just want to stay away from people and read books and think”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-just-want-to-stay-away-from-people-and-read-books-and-think/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [She smiled with all the delight of a kid on Christmas morning and said, "Y'all smoke to enjoy it. I smoke to die." -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/she-smiled-with-all-the-delight-of-a-kid-on-christmas-morning-and/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [A Margo for each of us--and each more mirror than window.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/a-margo-for-each-of-us-and-each-more-mirror-than-window/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“No one ever says good-bye unless they want to see you again.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/no-one-ever-says-good-bye-unless-they-want-to-see-you-again/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Neither novels or their readers benefit from any attempts to divine whether any facts hide inside a story. Such efforts attack the very idea…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/neither-novels-or-their-readers-benefit-from-any-attempts-to-divine/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“Traffic's not too bad on Sheridan, and I'm cornering the car like it's the Indy 500, and we're listening to my favorite NMH song,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/traffic-s-not-too-bad-on-sheridan-and-i-m-cornering-the-car-like-it-s/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“Praise God for good nurses.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/praise-god-for-good-nurses/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [So I was ugly. I was never fat, really, and I never wore headgear or had zits or anything. But I was ugly. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/so-i-was-ugly-i-was-never-fat-really-and-i-never-wore-headgear-or-had/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Nothing has ever looked like that ever in all of human history.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/nothing-has-ever-looked-like-that-ever-in-all-of-human-history/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“said to him quietly, as if I couldn’t hear or something. Dad was about to respond but I interrupted.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/said-to-him-quietly-as-if-i-couldn-t-hear-or-something-dad-was-about/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I believe humans have souls, and I believe in the conservation of souls.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-believe-humans-have-souls-and-i-believe-in-the-conservation-of-souls/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“He was hot. A nonhotboy stares at you relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of assault. But a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/he-was-hot-a-nonhotboy-stares-at-you-relentlessly-and-it-is-at-best/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I think if you keep the box closed long enough you do kill the cat, actually.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-think-if-you-keep-the-box-closed-long-enough-you-do-kill-the-cat/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Imagining the future is a kind of nostalgia. (...) You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/imagining-the-future-is-a-kind-of-nostalgia-you-spend-your-whole-life/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Explore all 3,614 John Green quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) ## More Bad boy quotes > [“But my best friend from college was silent for a long time. She, of all of my friends, had seen the parade of sad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lauren-groff/but-my-best-friend-from-college-was-silent-for-a-long-time-she-of-all/) [Lauren Groff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lauren-groff/) > [“I know the guy your parents don't like is exactly the kind of guy you think you want. But the idea of the bad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shana-norris/i-know-the-guy-your-parents-don-t-like-is-exactly-the-kind-of-guy-you/) [Shana Norris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shana-norris/) > [I like the bad-boy types. 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Like, I have been into the surfer blond…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashley-tisdale/i-just-like-guys-who-have-an-edge-to-them-but-it-could-go-either-way/) [Ashley Tisdale](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashley-tisdale/) > [“If there was a bad guy we could appeal to the people because, like it or not, we, the huddled masses, want our public…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-carter/if-there-was-a-bad-guy-we-could-appeal-to-the-people-because-like-it/) [Bill Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-carter/) > [We started this together, Leo. Seems only right you come along. You find us a ride, you're in." "Yes!" Leo pumped his fist. \*…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-riordan/we-started-this-together-leo-seems-only-right-you-come-along-you-find/) [Rick Riordan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-riordan/) > [The paranormal bad boy is usually a fiercely loyal partner for the heroine. 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But with Sara, there's never a honeymoon period. God, how could she think I was a rat? I know, I know: Why don't we break up?' He ran a hand through his hair, clutching a fistful of it atop his head, and said, ' I guess I saty with her because she stays with me. And that's not an easy thing to do. I'm a bad boyfriend. She's a bad girlfriend. 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