--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: When you are influential and highly…" description: "\"When you are influential and highly respected, people tend to tell you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. They are seeking your approval..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/256/john-c-maxwell-113_approval_when-you-are-influential-and-highly-resp_1488549.jpg" --- # When you are influential and highly respected, people tend… ![“When you are influential and highly respected, people tend to tell you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. They are seeking your approval, or they flatter you. Unfortunately, this creates a gap between what you hear and reality. If you find yourself in that situation, you will need…” quote by John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/256/john-c-maxwell-113_approval_when-you-are-influential-and-highly-resp_1488549.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/256/john-c-maxwell-113_approval_when-you-are-influential-and-highly-resp_1488549.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/256/john-c-maxwell-113_approval_when-you-are-influential-and-highly-resp_1488549.jpg) > “When you are influential and highly respected, people tend to tell you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. They are seeking your approval, or they flatter you. Unfortunately, this creates a gap between what you hear and reality. If you find yourself in that situation, you will need to work extra hard to get the people close to you to speak honestly into your life. And you will have to become highly intentional in observing and listening.” [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Influence can attract flattering but untruthful feedback, creating a blind spot between perception and reality. **In simple terms:** Flattery hides truth; listen actively for honesty. Key Takeaway Seek honest feedback despite praise. Themes leadership communication authenticity Mood reflective cautious Type advisory motivational When to use this quote - executive coaching - team meetings - mentor relationships - performance reviews Key Concepts psychology social dynamics feedback loops Questions to Reflect On - How can you encourage candidness? - What signals indicate you’re hearing only praise? A Different Perspective People may with honest to protect you, limiting growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Approval](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/approval/) [Extras](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/extras/) [Finding yourself](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/finding-yourself/) [Gaps](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/gaps/) [Hard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hard/) [Hear Need](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hear-need-2742412/) [Hear Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hear-reality-5438679/) [Hear Seeking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hear-seeking-5438678/) [Honestly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/honestly/) [Ifs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/) [Influential](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/influential/) [Listening](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/listening/) [Needs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/needs/) [Observing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/observing/) [Observing Listening](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/observing-listening-5050119/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reality/) [Seeking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/seeking/) [Situation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/situation/) [Speak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/speak/) [Speak Honestly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/speak-honestly-755175/) [Want](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/want/) [What you want](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/what-you-want/) ## Related quotes > [Seeing, observing, listening, these are the greatest acts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jiddu-krishnamurti/seeing-observing-listening-these-are-the-greatest-acts/) [Jiddu Krishnamurti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jiddu-krishnamurti/) > [It doesn't matter if I ever win another award or get to play another major jazz festival in America. I would rather not garner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christian-scott/it-doesn-t-matter-if-i-ever-win-another-award-or-get-to-play-another/) [Christian Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christian-scott/) > [The administration needs to speak honestly with the American people. Exaggerating our progress in defeating the insurgency or in creating an Iraqi army paints…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherrod-brown/the-administration-needs-to-speak-honestly-with-the-american-people/) [Sherrod Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherrod-brown/) > [I was the shyest kid. I'd never speak, only if I had to. Honestly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bonnie-langford/i-was-the-shyest-kid-i-d-never-speak-only-if-i-had-to-honestly/) [Bonnie Langford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bonnie-langford/) > [We have to come together and speak honestly about what the barriers are within our community - and then tear them down. It's really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tarana-burke/we-have-to-come-together-and-speak-honestly-about-what-the-barriers/) [Tarana Burke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tarana-burke/) > [I always try to conduct myself in the right way - I always speak honestly and from the heart.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-cross/i-always-try-to-conduct-myself-in-the-right-way-i-always-speak/) [Rob Cross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-cross/) > [Some won't appreciate what you say or do, but as long as you speak honestly from the heart, you will be fine. This is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/some-won-t-appreciate-what-you-say-or-do-but-as-long-as-you-speak/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“We simply must speak to each other honestly about all these hard truths.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/historica-press/we-simply-must-speak-to-each-other-honestly-about-all-these-hard/) [Historica Press](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/historica-press/) > [We must remind our politicians that we expect them to speak honestly and to be concerned about real issues, and not simply with the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/davis-mccaughey/we-must-remind-our-politicians-that-we-expect-them-to-speak-honestly/) [Davis McCaughey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/davis-mccaughey/) > [The 'hood don't really wanna hear it, but you need brown rice, you need wheat bread, stuff like that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fat-joe/the-hood-don-t-really-wanna-hear-it-but-you-need-brown-rice-you-need/) [Fat Joe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fat-joe/) > [“You need to be confronted By the Stranger on the shore You need to have Him search your soul You need to hear the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-card/you-need-to-be-confronted-by-the-stranger-on-the-shore-you-need-to/) [Michael Card](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-card/) > [When you're focused, you don't hear the crowd noises, you only hear what you need to hear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rudy-ruettiger/when-you-re-focused-you-don-t-hear-the-crowd-noises-you-only-hear/) [Rudy Ruettiger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rudy-ruettiger/) > [“Do you need more? Tell me, Nikki. I want to hear what you need.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-kenner/do-you-need-more-tell-me-nikki-i-want-to-hear-what-you-need/) [J. Kenner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-kenner/) > [True friend won't always tells you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/blaze-olamiday/true-friend-won-t-always-tells-you-what-you-want-to-hear-but-what-you/) [Blaze Olamiday](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/blaze-olamiday/) > [“You tell us the shit we don't want to hear—that we need to hear. That's a thankless job.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kit-rocha/you-tell-us-the-shit-we-don-t-want-to-hear-that-we-need-to-hear-that/) [Kit Rocha](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kit-rocha/) ## More by John C. Maxwell > [“Why do so many people do nothing? I think it’s because most of us look at the evils and injustice around us, and we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/why-do-so-many-people-do-nothing-i-think-it-s-because-most-of-us-look/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [You cannot have growth without change.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/you-cannot-have-growth-without-change/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/change-is-inevitable-growth-is-optional/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Goals not only help you develop initial motivation by making your dreams obtainable, but they also help you continue to be motivated and that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/goals-not-only-help-you-develop-initial-motivation-by-making-your/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Vision is a picture of a desired future; a picture of something that I don't possess right now, but it is something I want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/vision-is-a-picture-of-a-desired-future-a-picture-of-something-that-i/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [If you want to make your mother happy, talk to her. If you want to make your father happy, listen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/if-you-want-to-make-your-mother-happy-talk-to-her-if-you-want-to-make/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Experiences isn't the best teacher - evaluated experience is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/experiences-isn-t-the-best-teacher-evaluated-experience-is/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [A big man is one who makes us feel bigger when we are with him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/a-big-man-is-one-who-makes-us-feel-bigger-when-we-are-with-him/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Passion gives you an advantage over others, because one person with passion is greater than ninety-nine who have only an interest!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/passion-gives-you-an-advantage-over-others-because-one-person-with/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [I thought if I was open and honest, it would help the reader to get open and honest, and they also would realize sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/i-thought-if-i-was-open-and-honest-it-would-help-the-reader-to-get/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [A person who has a dream knows what he is willing to give up in order to go up.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/a-person-who-has-a-dream-knows-what-he-is-willing-to-give-up-in-order/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [The bottom line on attitude is that a good one helps to increase your possibilities. Pessimists usually get what they expect. So do optimists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/the-bottom-line-on-attitude-is-that-a-good-one-helps-to-increase-your/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Working together precedes winning together...collaboration is multiplication.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/working-together-precedes-winning-together-collaboration-is/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Leaders don't rise to the pinnacle of success without developing the right set of attitudes and habits; they make every day a masterpiece.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/leaders-don-t-rise-to-the-pinnacle-of-success-without-developing-the/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) > [Your leadership skills determine the level of your success, and the success of those who work around you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-maxwell/your-leadership-skills-determine-the-level-of-your-success-and-the/) [John C. Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) [Explore all 1,233 John C. Maxwell quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-maxwell/) ## More Approval quotes > [Anyone who's read my 'Terror in the Skies' series knows that I have not been writing with an eye toward approval from any government…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/annie-jacobsen/anyone-who-s-read-my-terror-in-the-skies-series-knows-that-i-have-not/) [Annie Jacobsen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/annie-jacobsen/) > [we need not avoid our active lives, but simply bring to them a new vision and shift of gravity. for in the center we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sue-monk-kidd/we-need-not-avoid-our-active-lives-but-simply-bring-to-them-a-new/) [Sue Monk Kidd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sue-monk-kidd/) > [Lean too much on the approval of people, and it becomes a bed of thorns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tehyi-hsieh/lean-too-much-on-the-approval-of-people-and-it-becomes-a-bed-of-thorns/) [Tehyi Hsieh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tehyi-hsieh/) > [But I always reassure them that as far as my contractual rights can go, I will protect them and make sure that they have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-roach/but-i-always-reassure-them-that-as-far-as-my-contractual-rights-can/) [Jay Roach](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-roach/) > [Growing up in that fashion is a breeding ground for insecurity and doubt; it also leaves you questioning motives. It took me a long…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/damon-runyon/growing-up-in-that-fashion-is-a-breeding-ground-for-insecurity-and/) [Damon Runyon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/damon-runyon/) > [A year ago, my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the supreme court had just withdrawn, and my vice president had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/a-year-ago-my-approval-rating-was-in-the-30s-my-nominee-for-the/) [George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/) > [Approval is a greater motivator than disapproval, but we have to disapprove on occasion when we correct. It’s necessary. I make corrections only after…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-wooden/approval-is-a-greater-motivator-than-disapproval-but-we-have-to/) [John Wooden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-wooden/) > [These days people are mean to people just because they don't like the way they look. No-one should be hated because of their flaws.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sonya-parker/these-days-people-are-mean-to-people-just-because-they-don-t-like-the/) [Sonya Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sonya-parker/) > [I got this emptiness inside that got me fighting for approval because I missed out on my daddy saying, Way to Go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lecrae/i-got-this-emptiness-inside-that-got-me-fighting-for-approval-because/) [Lecrae](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lecrae/) > [My dad taught me swears when I was a toddler, and I saw, at a really early age, that if I shocked people, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roseanne-barr/my-dad-taught-me-swears-when-i-was-a-toddler-and-i-saw-at-a-really/) [Roseanne Barr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roseanne-barr/) > [If torture is going to be administered as a last resort in the ticking-bomb case, to save enormous numbers of lives, it ought to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-dershowitz/if-torture-is-going-to-be-administered-as-a-last-resort-in-the/) [Alan Dershowitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-dershowitz/) > [Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-chappelle/comedy-is-a-very-approval-oriented-field/) [Dave Chappelle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-chappelle/) > [Whenever you are too worried about someone else's approval, that person loses respect for you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherry-argov/whenever-you-are-too-worried-about-someone-else-s-approval-that/) [Sherry Argov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherry-argov/) > [Pleasure is Nature's test, her sign of approval.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oscar-wilde/pleasure-is-nature-s-test-her-sign-of-approval/) [Oscar Wilde](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oscar-wilde/) > [Do you really mean the only reason you try to be good is to gain God's approval and reward? That's not morality, that's just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-dawkins/do-you-really-mean-the-only-reason-you-try-to-be-good-is-to-gain-god/) [Richard Dawkins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-dawkins/) [Browse all 904 Approval quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/approval/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you are influential and highly respected, people tend to tell you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. They are seeking your approval, or they flatter you. Unfortunately, this creates a gap between what you hear and reality. If you find yourself in that situation, you will need to work extra hard to get the people close to you to speak honestly into your life. And you will have to become highly intentional in observing and listening.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "John C. 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