--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You can blame your ugliness for keeping…" description: "\"You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay, when in reality you're crippled by the thought of letting another person close enough to popenti..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/jodi-picoult-45_blame_you-can-blame-your-ugliness-for-keeping_591350.jpg" --- # You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay… ![“You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay, when in reality you're crippled by the thought of letting another person close enough to popentially scar you even more deeply. You can tell yourself that it's safer to love someone who will never really love you back, because you can't lose…” quote by Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/jodi-picoult-45_blame_you-can-blame-your-ugliness-for-keeping_591350.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/jodi-picoult-45_blame_you-can-blame-your-ugliness-for-keeping_591350.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/jodi-picoult-45_blame_you-can-blame-your-ugliness-for-keeping_591350.jpg) > “You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay, when in reality you're crippled by the thought of letting another person close enough to popentially scar you even more deeply. You can tell yourself that it's safer to love someone who will never really love you back, because you can't lose someone you never had.” [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. People may hide behind self‑protection, fearing intimacy and potential emotional pain, leading to self‑sabotage in relationships. **In simple terms:** Fear of closeness causes self‑sabotage. Key Takeaway Address fear to build healthier connections. Themes vulnerability self‑protection relationships Mood introspective empathetic Type therapeutic literary When to use this quote - dating - friendships - family dynamics Key Concepts psychology emotional health attachment theory Questions to Reflect On - What fears keep you from closeness? - How can you balance self‑protection with openness? A Different Perspective Avoiding intimacy can also prevent genuine connection and growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Blame](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blame/) [Blame Ugliness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blame-ugliness-3127605/) [Enough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/enough/) [Love Lose](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-lose/) [Love you](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-you/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Persons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/) [Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reality/) [Safer Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/safer-love-1312094/) [Scar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/scar/) [Ugliness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ugliness/) [Ugliness Keeping](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ugliness-keeping-4839652/) ## Related quotes > [“You can believe, for example, that a dead-end job is a career. You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay, when in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/you-can-believe-for-example-that-a-dead-end-job-is-a-career-you-can/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“Her grandmother had once told her that one could blame ugliness on one's genes and ignorance on one's education, but there was absolutely no…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ruth-hogan/her-grandmother-had-once-told-her-that-one-could-blame-ugliness-on/) [Ruth Hogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ruth-hogan/) > [“I am an orange construction cone, and I say to you, “Caution.” This is my advice for love—and for driving while blindfolded, which is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/i-am-an-orange-construction-cone-and-i-say-to-you-caution-this-is-my/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [“For reasons that are not well understood, war's codes are safer for most of us than love's.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-foster-wallace/for-reasons-that-are-not-well-understood-war-s-codes-are-safer-for/) [David Foster Wallace](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-foster-wallace/) > [“Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life love knocks our doors, enters our lives & changes it forever. You…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anamika-mishra/once-in-a-while-right-in-the-middle-of-an-ordinary-life-love-knocks/) [Anamika Mishra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anamika-mishra/) > [“Love in pencil is safer than love in life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/courtney-c-stevens/love-in-pencil-is-safer-than-love-in-life/) [Courtney C. Stevens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/courtney-c-stevens/) > [Safer than we are.” I told Franny. “Safer than love.” “let me tell ya kid,” Franny said to me, squeezing my hand. “Everything’s safer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-irving/safer-than-we-are-i-told-franny-safer-than-love-let-me-tell-ya-kid/) [John Irving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-irving/) > [I always hated when my scars started to fade, because as long as I could still see them, I knew why I was hurting.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/i-always-hated-when-my-scars-started-to-fade-because-as-long-as-i/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“We love because we can lose. If there was no threat of separation, no death to shake us to our core, we probably wouldn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donna-lynn-hope/we-love-because-we-can-lose-if-there-was-no-threat-of-separation-no/) [Donna Lynn Hope](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donna-lynn-hope/) > [It's better to lose your Ego to the one you Love, than to lose the one you Love because of Ego.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/it-s-better-to-lose-your-ego-to-the-one-you-love-than-to-lose-the-one/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [You may lose people you love. You may lose things you had.. but no matter what, never lose yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ziad-k-abdelnour/you-may-lose-people-you-love-you-may-lose-things-you-had-but-no/) [Ziad K. Abdelnour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ziad-k-abdelnour/) > [I love to lose myself in other men's minds.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-lamb/i-love-to-lose-myself-in-other-men-s-minds/) [Charles Lamb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-lamb/) > [Fight for what you love otherwise you will lose it](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/romana-crystaallized/fight-for-what-you-love-otherwise-you-will-lose-it/) [Romana Crystaallized](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/romana-crystaallized/) > [The only reason I don't tell you how I feel is because I love you too much to lose you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-only-reason-i-don-t-tell-you-how-i-feel-is-because-i-love-you-too/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“If you love too much, you lose yourself. If you love too little, you never find yourself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-gallagher-nestor/if-you-love-too-much-you-lose-yourself-if-you-love-too-little-you/) [Janet Gallagher Nestor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-gallagher-nestor/) ## More by Jodi Picoult > [You get through it, you just never get over it](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/you-get-through-it-you-just-never-get-over-it/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“Let me guess," Eric says, "You never meant for it to happen." "Hell, yes, I did. I've wanted her since you two started dating."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/let-me-guess-eric-says-you-never-meant-for-it-to-happen-hell-yes-i/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“It’s the difference between dancing along the eggshell crust of acquaintance and diving into the messy center of a relationship.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/it-s-the-difference-between-dancing-along-the-eggshell-crust-of/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [Because hate's just the flip side of love. Like heads and tails on a dime. If you don't know what it feels like to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/because-hate-s-just-the-flip-side-of-love-like-heads-and-tails-on-a/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [Some women are meant to change the world, while others are meant to hold it together. And then there are those of us who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/some-women-are-meant-to-change-the-world-while-others-are-meant-to/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [I love feeling loved. I don't love knowing that I will always come in second place. I love the fact that at least sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/i-love-feeling-loved-i-don-t-love-knowing-that-i-will-always-come-in/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“Music is the language of memory”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/music-is-the-language-of-memory/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [But there is a different between mending someone who's broken and finding someone who makes you complete.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/but-there-is-a-different-between-mending-someone-who-s-broken-and/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“sometimes words are not big enough to contain all the feelings you are trying to pour into them. My”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/sometimes-words-are-not-big-enough-to-contain-all-the-feelings-you/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“The age wasn't as important as the milestones.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/the-age-wasn-t-as-important-as-the-milestones/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [The night is falling down around us. Meteors rain like fireworks, quick rips in the seam of the dark... Every second, another streak of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/the-night-is-falling-down-around-us-meteors-rain-like-fireworks-quick/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“When she had packed all the artifacts that made up their personal history into liquor store boxes, the house became strictly a feminine place.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/when-she-had-packed-all-the-artifacts-that-made-up-their-personal/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“Maybe who we are isn't so much about what we do, but rather what we're capable of when we least expect it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/maybe-who-we-are-isn-t-so-much-about-what-we-do-but-rather-what-we-re/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [“Here's what I hadn't realized : the mother you haven't seen for almost 36 years isn't your mother. She is a stranger. Sharing DNA…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/here-s-what-i-hadn-t-realized-the-mother-you-haven-t-seen-for-almost/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [My brother believed in all sorts of mythical creatures: pixies, dragons, werewolves, honest men.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/my-brother-believed-in-all-sorts-of-mythical-creatures-pixies-dragons/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) [Explore all 2,062 Jodi Picoult quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) ## More Blame quotes > [“I have to blame myself for not finding any way of reaching him, but I can't feel that either Ruth or I had anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/i-have-to-blame-myself-for-not-finding-any-way-of-reaching-him-but-i/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Me mum used to always have the radio on - even now she has it on in every room. Me girlfriend sort of blames…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karl-pilkington/me-mum-used-to-always-have-the-radio-on-even-now-she-has-it-on-in/) [Karl Pilkington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karl-pilkington/) > [I like to praise and reward loudly, to blame quietly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catherine-the-great/i-like-to-praise-and-reward-loudly-to-blame-quietly/) [Catherine the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catherine-the-great/) > [Some of the things that I said I hated to say, but blame yourself mother fucker you made it this way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jedi-mind-tricks/some-of-the-things-that-i-said-i-hated-to-say-but-blame-yourself/) [Jedi Mind Tricks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jedi-mind-tricks/) > [Holy shadows of the dead, I'm not to blame for your cruel and bitter fate, but the accursed rivalry which brought sister nations and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-the-great/holy-shadows-of-the-dead-i-m-not-to-blame-for-your-cruel-and-bitter/) [Alexander the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-the-great/) > [“In places where government priorities and market imperatives create a world so capricious that to help a neighbor is to risk your ability to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katherine-boo/in-places-where-government-priorities-and-market-imperatives-create-a/) [Katherine Boo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katherine-boo/) > [“Stop Blaming Others For Your Own Actions”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexis-g-roldan/stop-blaming-others-for-your-own-actions/) [Alexis G. Roldan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexis-g-roldan/) > [We know from this book entitled... What is it? Surrendered? Succumbed? I can never remember the title perform. And we learn from this book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rush-limbaugh/we-know-from-this-book-entitled-what-is-it-surrendered-succumbed-i/) [Rush Limbaugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rush-limbaugh/) > [I don't blame anyone .. I did this to myself .. It's my fault .. Everything is my FAULT ...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nurnizz95/i-don-t-blame-anyone-i-did-this-to-myself-it-s-my-fault-everything-is/) [Nurnizz95](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nurnizz95/) > [“They would congratulate themselves every morning on keeping their integrity, and blame themselves each night for that missed opportunity.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/they-would-congratulate-themselves-every-morning-on-keeping-their/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [I try to live my life where I end up at a point where I have no regrets. So I try to choose the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darren-aronofsky/i-try-to-live-my-life-where-i-end-up-at-a-point-where-i-have-no/) [Darren Aronofsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/darren-aronofsky/) > [How come you don't feel that magic in the air? I guess I knew you'll never be there. I guess I knew you never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/how-come-you-don-t-feel-that-magic-in-the-air-i-guess-i-knew-you-ll/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I am down mentally. I can't understand how it happened and who is to blame? I don't know why the ground was rolled before…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yeasin-khan/i-am-down-mentally-i-can-t-understand-how-it-happened-and-who-is-to/) [Yeasin Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yeasin-khan/) > [A refusal to admit one's mistake & not accepting responsibility for that mistake by blaming everyone else, is d beginning of one's decline.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-refusal-to-admit-one-s-mistake-not-accepting-responsibility-for/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Listen, the guy was not created by coverage from MSNBC and CNN. If you want to blame us for making Donald Trump president because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-tur/listen-the-guy-was-not-created-by-coverage-from-msnbc-and-cnn-if-you/) [Katy Tur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katy-tur/) [Browse all 3,779 Blame quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blame/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You can blame your ugliness for keeping people at bay, when in reality you're crippled by the thought of letting another person close enough to popentially scar you even more deeply. 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