---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Instinctively, I realized that if I…"
description: "\"“Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life for myself outside the orb of my child’s world, I would cripple both of us.”\" — Joanna Campbel..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg"
---

#  Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life…

![“Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life for myself outside the orb of my child’s world, I would cripple both of us.” quote by Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg)

> ““Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life for myself outside the orb of my child’s world, I would cripple both of us.””

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Balancing personal identity outside parenting is essential for both parent and child’s well‑being.

**In simple terms:** Parents need separate lives for healthy families.

Key Takeaway

Cultivate personal goals beyond parenting.

Themes

family identity balance growth well‑being

Mood

reflective hopeful

Type

inspirational psychological

When to use this quote

- career planning
- self‑care routines
- relationship building
- mental health

Key Concepts

self‑actualization role conflict parenting dynamics

Questions to Reflect On

- What personal passions have you neglected?
- How does your identity shape your parenting?

A Different Perspective

Focusing solely on children can cause dependency.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/)

## Related quotes

> [People talk about smart sanctions and crippling sanctions. I've never seen smart sanctions, and crippling sanctions cripple everyone, including innocent civilians, and make the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mohamed-elbaradei/people-talk-about-smart-sanctions-and-crippling-sanctions-i-ve-never/)

[Mohamed ElBaradei](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mohamed-elbaradei/)

> [“I have given him something neither of you can take. You can ask and he may allow because he loves this land and its…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-lawrence/i-have-given-him-something-neither-of-you-can-take-you-can-ask-and-he/)

[Mark Lawrence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-lawrence/)

> [I was born a cripple, with two club feet, and mild polio in the left leg. I was in orthopaedic boots right through to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-starkey/i-was-born-a-cripple-with-two-club-feet-and-mild-polio-in-the-left/)

[David Starkey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-starkey/)

> [Cynicism is the intellectual cripple's substitute for intelligence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/russell-lynes/cynicism-is-the-intellectual-cripple-s-substitute-for-intelligence/)

[Russell Lynes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/russell-lynes/)

> [Profanity is the crutch of a conversational cripple. . .](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-sutter/profanity-is-the-crutch-of-a-conversational-cripple/)

[Rick Sutter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-sutter/)

> [“The cripple here that you clothe and feed Is neither starved nor cold; He does not ask for your company, Not at the centre,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leonard-cohen/the-cripple-here-that-you-clothe-and-feed-is-neither-starved-nor-cold/)

[Leonard Cohen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leonard-cohen/)

> [How comes it that a cripple does not offend us, but a fool does? Because a cripple recognizes that we walk straight, whereas a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/blaise-pascal/how-comes-it-that-a-cripple-does-not-offend-us-but-a-fool-does/)

[Blaise Pascal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/blaise-pascal/)

> [Because I'm no longer a pop star 24 hours a day, I'm no longer bogged down by the stupid stuff that used to cripple…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robbie-williams/because-i-m-no-longer-a-pop-star-24-hours-a-day-i-m-no-longer-bogged/)

[Robbie Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robbie-williams/)

> [Think what evil creeps liberals would be if their plans to enfeeble the individual, exhaust the economy, impede the rule of law, and cripple…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/p-j-o-rourke/think-what-evil-creeps-liberals-would-be-if-their-plans-to-enfeeble/)

[P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/p-j-o-rourke/)

> [“A seemingly simple task like taking a bath or wearing a condom feels like multitasking to someone who suffers from hemiplegia or has only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/a-seemingly-simple-task-like-taking-a-bath-or-wearing-a-condom-feels/)

[Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/)

> [Cripple God, who always desires more than he's able to have, and doesn't always realize this to begin with. Who has built clocks, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/cripple-god-who-always-desires-more-than-he-s-able-to-have-and-doesn/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Practically everybody knows what it's like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-d-burns/practically-everybody-knows-what-it-s-like-to-feel-anxious-worried/)

[David D. Burns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-d-burns/)

> [My older brother was born, who was a cripple, then I was born, and my sister was born, the only girl. So I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracy-morgan/my-older-brother-was-born-who-was-a-cripple-then-i-was-born-and-my/)

[Tracy Morgan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tracy-morgan/)

> [I am not a saint or a cripple, I am not a wound; now I will see whether I am a coward.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-atwood/i-am-not-a-saint-or-a-cripple-i-am-not-a-wound-now-i-will-see-whether/)

[Margaret Atwood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-atwood/)

> [Emptiness will always cripple me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vishwajeet-pradhan/emptiness-will-always-cripple-me/)

[Vishwajeet Pradhan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vishwajeet-pradhan/)

## More by Joanna Campbell Slan

> [“I hate it when the voice inside my head chews me out.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/i-hate-it-when-the-voice-inside-my-head-chews-me-out/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“Parents don’t get to call in and take a day off. As always, the sight of her filled me with such an unbearable ache…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/parents-don-t-get-to-call-in-and-take-a-day-off-as-always-the-sight/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“My life in crime began with a good deed.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/my-life-in-crime-began-with-a-good-deed/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“Old hurts run deep. They hide inside you, only to be awakened at a moment's notice.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/old-hurts-run-deep-they-hide-inside-you-only-to-be-awakened-at-a/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“There was nothing to do but venture forth, in search of the person I might become. At”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/there-was-nothing-to-do-but-venture-forth-in-search-of-the-person-i/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“places, and incidents are either the”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/places-and-incidents-are-either-the/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“when it’s your own child, you are not a babysitter. It’s called parenting.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/when-it-s-your-own-child-you-are-not-a-babysitter-it-s-called/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“The jabs Sheila launched in my direction never failed to score a direct hit to my soft belly. I”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/the-jabs-sheila-launched-in-my-direction-never-failed-to-score-a/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“There isn’t a girl on earth who’d willingly give up her bangles.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/there-isn-t-a-girl-on-earth-who-d-willingly-give-up-her-bangles/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“I can't understand people being rude to their spouses. Your husband or wife should be the one person in the world you treat with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/i-can-t-understand-people-being-rude-to-their-spouses-your-husband-or/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“My golf career was blessedly short. It lasted all of one class. "Hit that tiny ball? Really?" I shook my head as I studied…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/my-golf-career-was-blessedly-short-it-lasted-all-of-one-class-hit/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

> [“What I really wanted — and needed — were friends of my own. People who would like and accept me for myself. Once”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/what-i-really-wanted-and-needed-were-friends-of-my-own-people-who/)

[Joanna Campbell Slan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

[Explore all 13 Joanna Campbell Slan quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/)

## More Children quotes

> [I am certain that children always know more than they are able to tell, and that makes the big difference between them and adults,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacques-lusseyran/i-am-certain-that-children-always-know-more-than-they-are-able-to/)

[Jacques Lusseyran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacques-lusseyran/)

> [Behind every successful child is an adult who believed in him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-warren/behind-every-successful-child-is-an-adult-who-believed-in-him/)

[Rick Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-warren/)

> [I believe in freedom to do what you want if you aren't hurting others, but pictures of obese protesters giving their children big gulps.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-defranco/i-believe-in-freedom-to-do-what-you-want-if-you-aren-t-hurting-others/)

[Philip DeFranco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-defranco/)

> [If the audience likes your work, if they like you, they don't think whether you are married or have children or not. I made…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dimple-kapadia/if-the-audience-likes-your-work-if-they-like-you-they-don-t-think/)

[Dimple Kapadia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dimple-kapadia/)

> [It doesnt seem to me strange that children should like the macabre, the sensational, and the forbidden.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-hecht/it-doesnt-seem-to-me-strange-that-children-should-like-the-macabre/)

[Anthony Hecht](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anthony-hecht/)

> [Let children support their parents or be imprisoned.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/let-children-support-their-parents-or-be-imprisoned/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Gratitude isn't just a feeling, it's an action. Expressing gratitude by writing in a journal, taking a photo, or shooting a video creates a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janice-kaplan/gratitude-isn-t-just-a-feeling-it-s-an-action-expressing-gratitude-by/)

[Janice Kaplan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janice-kaplan/)

> [My embarrassing confession is that my father is a 'Camelot: The Musical' obsessive. So as a child, when we were going to visit relatives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-chibnall/my-embarrassing-confession-is-that-my-father-is-a-camelot-the-musical/)

[Chris Chibnall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-chibnall/)

> [I have many who keep me going, I am very fortunate in this sense. There is nothing like a child who knows more about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/floyd-cooper/i-have-many-who-keep-me-going-i-am-very-fortunate-in-this-sense-there/)

[Floyd Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/floyd-cooper/)

> [My school was one of the most beautiful places a child can grow up in. You are surrounded by nature - cats, dogs, birds…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amala-akkineni/my-school-was-one-of-the-most-beautiful-places-a-child-can-grow-up-in/)

[Amala Akkineni](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amala-akkineni/)

> [A lesser complaint: hair extensions. There are moments on 'All My Children' when half the women actors, young and old, seem to be afflicted…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/camille-paglia/a-lesser-complaint-hair-extensions-there-are-moments-on-all-my/)

[Camille Paglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/camille-paglia/)

> [As a child, I had a lot of older gay men taking care of me. There's a trust there. I feel like little girls…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-cho/as-a-child-i-had-a-lot-of-older-gay-men-taking-care-of-me-there-s-a/)

[Margaret Cho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-cho/)

> [If my child had prejudice in his head, I'd be ashamed. I would see it as my failure as a parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/salman-rushdie/if-my-child-had-prejudice-in-his-head-i-d-be-ashamed-i-would-see-it/)

[Salman Rushdie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/salman-rushdie/)

> [“Children's lives are always beginning and adults' lives are always ending. Or is it the opposite? Your childhood is always ending and your adult…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-espach/children-s-lives-are-always-beginning-and-adults-lives-are-always/)

[Alison Espach](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-espach/)

> [As a child I was very involved with sports and I knew at age 9 that I wanted to be an Olympic champion.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marion-jones/as-a-child-i-was-very-involved-with-sports-and-i-knew-at-age-9-that-i/)

[Marion Jones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marion-jones/)

[Browse all 62,396 Children quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life for myself outside the orb of my child’s world, I would cripple both of us.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Joanna Campbell Slan"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn-t-build-a-life-for-myself/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Children"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn-t-build-a-life-for-myself/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e3/joanna-campbell-slan-35123_children_instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn_2166042.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Instinctively, I realized that if I didn’t build a life for myself outside the orb of my child’s world, I…” — Joanna Campbell Slan",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Joanna Campbell Slan",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joanna-campbell-slan/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“Instinctively, I realized that if I...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn-t-build-a-life-for-myself/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joanna-campbell-slan/instinctively-i-realized-that-if-i-didn-t-build-a-life-for-myself/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
