--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It's like I'm carrying around this huge…" description: "\"“It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm never supposed to tell. But since I don't remember just what I'm supposed to keep secret, I'm ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg" --- # It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm… ![“It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm never supposed to tell. But since I don't remember just what I'm supposed to keep secret, I'm afraid I'll tell it by mistake.” quote by Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg) > ““It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm never supposed to tell. But since I don't remember just what I'm supposed to keep secret, I'm afraid I'll tell it by mistake.”” [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Holding a secret without recalling its details creates anxiety and the risk of accidental disclosure. **In simple terms:** Unclear secrets cause fear of accidental reveal. Key Takeaway Clarify and resolve hidden concerns. Themes secrecy anxiety memory Mood anxious reflective Type personal psychological When to use this quote - personal relationships - conflict resolution - self‑reflection Key Concepts psychology communication trust Questions to Reflect On - What secret are you avoiding? - How can you safely address unknown obligations? A Different Perspective May cause unnecessary stress. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abuse-survivor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse-survivor/) [Dissociative-amnesia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dissociative-amnesia/) [Failure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/failure/) [Repressed-memories](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/repressed-memories/) [Secrets](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/secrets/) [Trauma-memory](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trauma-memory/) ## Related quotes > [Hurts that we have to keep our love a secret from everyone afraid that they would be disgusted by something that we know to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/hurts-that-we-have-to-keep-our-love-a-secret-from-everyone-afraid/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“I need to know how you did it.” “I did it,” said Sweeney, with the air of one confiding a huge secret, “with panache…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-gaiman/i-need-to-know-how-you-did-it-i-did-it-said-sweeney-with-the-air-of/) [Neil Gaiman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-gaiman/) > [I don't want to find the secret. I'm afraid all the joy will go out of it if I find the secret.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-newhart/i-don-t-want-to-find-the-secret-i-m-afraid-all-the-joy-will-go-out-of/) [Bob Newhart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-newhart/) > [Gay people in general, I think, like telling secrets because we have to hide a huge secret for the first half of our lives.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-needles/gay-people-in-general-i-think-like-telling-secrets-because-we-have-to/) [Sharon Needles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-needles/) > [The secret to not being afraid is to understand what scares you](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deborah-wiles/the-secret-to-not-being-afraid-is-to-understand-what-scares-you/) [Deborah Wiles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deborah-wiles/) > [Daniel supposed he had a secret life. Most people did; it was hardly possible to live without one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/daniel-supposed-he-had-a-secret-life-most-people-did-it-was-hardly/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [It's not any huge secret that I'm an atheist.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joss-whedon/it-s-not-any-huge-secret-that-i-m-an-atheist/) [Joss Whedon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joss-whedon/) > [It's supposed to be a secret, but I'll tell you anyway. We doctors do nothing. We only help. And encourage the doctor within.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-schweitzer/it-s-supposed-to-be-a-secret-but-i-ll-tell-you-anyway-we-doctors-do/) [Albert Schweitzer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-schweitzer/) > [I had to face the fact that I had been using my gay friends as props. They were always supposed to be funny and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tina-fey/i-had-to-face-the-fact-that-i-had-been-using-my-gay-friends-as-props/) [Tina Fey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tina-fey/) > [The truth is, I think, when I got to Nashville in 2011 in my little camper trailer, I had not lived enough life at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lainey-wilson/the-truth-is-i-think-when-i-got-to-nashville-in-2011-in-my-little/) [Lainey Wilson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lainey-wilson/) > [ “You’re supposed to tell me your plan . \[...\] “My plan?” “Yeah,” \[...\] “Your ingenious method. You’re supposed to tell me all the bullshit… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jenna-moreci/you-re-supposed-to-tell-me-your-plan-my-plan-yeah-your-ingenious/) Jenna Moreci > [“How was I supposed to tell him how he affected me and how that any other time before this moment meant absolutely nothing, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peggy-martinez/how-was-i-supposed-to-tell-him-how-he-affected-me-and-how-that-any/) [Peggy Martinez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peggy-martinez/) > [“Do I know what a man is ? Do I know how a man is supposed to die ? I’m still trying to find…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ernest-j-gaines/do-i-know-what-a-man-is-do-i-know-how-a-man-is-supposed-to-die-i-m/) [Ernest J. Gaines](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ernest-j-gaines/) > [They called and said, "I know we're not supposed to even tell you, but you've been offered to play the President." And I said,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/geena-davis/they-called-and-said-i-know-we-re-not-supposed-to-even-tell-you-but/) [Geena Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/geena-davis/) > [At the end of the day, in order for me to be able to tell the kind of stories that I'm supposed to tell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lainey-wilson/at-the-end-of-the-day-in-order-for-me-to-be-able-to-tell-the-kind-of/) [Lainey Wilson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lainey-wilson/) ## More by Joan Frances Casey > [“I thought carefully about the events of the evening and decided that there must be limitations on desires. It wasn't true that I could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-thought-carefully-about-the-events-of-the-evening-and-decided-that/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“Lynn said that therapy was like separating the strands in a tangled web of yarn. It made sense that things would keep getting more…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/lynn-said-that-therapy-was-like-separating-the-strands-in-a-tangled/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I'm going through hell," I cried, "and Steve wants me to be thankful he baked a pie." (272)”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-m-going-through-hell-i-cried-and-steve-wants-me-to-be-thankful-he/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I had never before considered that people near me might have problems that were not caused by me. I had been created to please…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-had-never-before-considered-that-people-near-me-might-have-problems/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I feel as though I can only hold it together if I don't worry too much about its falling apart. (288)”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-feel-as-though-i-can-only-hold-it-together-if-i-don-t-worry-too/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“Jo knew she had to be utterly truthful, even when her version of the truth conflicted with what Lynn wanted to hear. Truth was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/jo-knew-she-had-to-be-utterly-truthful-even-when-her-version-of-the/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“Why didn't I feel that I belonged to my parents? How could I have known that I was not right? I think it has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/why-didn-t-i-feel-that-i-belonged-to-my-parents-how-could-i-have/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“Now that she had the diagnosis to explain her sense of reality, she sorted some of the chaotic jumble of thoughts and memories. "I'd…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/now-that-she-had-the-diagnosis-to-explain-her-sense-of-reality-she/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“The accuracy of my memories, whether things happened exactly the way that the personalities remember, doesn't really matter. If my memory, combined with the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/the-accuracy-of-my-memories-whether-things-happened-exactly-the-way/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I don't expect to have a fully verified story of how Jo's disorder developed, but I don't think that historical accuracy is as important…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-don-t-expect-to-have-a-fully-verified-story-of-how-jo-s-disorder/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I knew Lynn was a "professional." Like all of the therapists I had seen before her, she was talking to me because she was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-knew-lynn-was-a-professional-like-all-of-the-therapists-i-had-seen/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I get attached to people, but they have their own lives, their own problems, and really don't give a shit about anyone else. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-get-attached-to-people-but-they-have-their-own-lives-their-own/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“I attempted to be clear and straightforward in my approach to Dr Tate, deferring to his medical expertise and stating my desire merely to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/i-attempted-to-be-clear-and-straightforward-in-my-approach-to-dr-tate/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [ “The little girl's dependency on her father made \[his\] abuse more insidious.” ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/the-little-girl-s-dependency-on-her-father-made-his-abuse-more/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) > [“When I'm sailing, sometimes I'll spend hours watching flocks of birds. They have something special going on there," Gordon continued. "They are all separate…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/when-i-m-sailing-sometimes-i-ll-spend-hours-watching-flocks-of-birds/) [Joan Frances Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) [Explore all 31 Joan Frances Casey quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/) ## More Abuse-survivor quotes > [“I lived through this horror, and no one can tell me I have to stay quiet. "I have been silenced long enough, and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erin-merryn/i-lived-through-this-horror-and-no-one-can-tell-me-i-have-to-stay/) [Erin Merryn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erin-merryn/) > [“Never let your past define you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kaitlyn-stone/never-let-your-past-define-you/) Kaitlyn Stone > [“Survivors often develop an exaggerated need for control in their adult relationships. It’s the only way they feel safe. They also struggle with commitment—saying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-davis/survivors-often-develop-an-exaggerated-need-for-control-in-their/) [Laura Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-davis/) > [“When I deny the seriousness of my abuse I agree with my abuser and those who wouldn't acknowledge it. When I am in denial,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patty-hite/when-i-deny-the-seriousness-of-my-abuse-i-agree-with-my-abuser-and/) Patty Hite > [“It was early in my career, and I had been seeing Mary, a shy, lonely, and physically collapsed young woman, for about three months in weekly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bessel-a-van-der-kolk/it-was-early-in-my-career-and-i-had-been-seeing-mary-a-shy-lonely-and/) [Bessel A. van der Kolk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bessel-a-van-der-kolk/) > [“The bottom line was that I was in an abusive relationship.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-celebi/the-bottom-line-was-that-i-was-in-an-abusive-relationship/) [Shannon Celebi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-celebi/) > [“Along with the trust issues, one of the hardest parts to deal with is the feeling of not being believed or supported, especially by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erin-merryn/along-with-the-trust-issues-one-of-the-hardest-parts-to-deal-with-is/) [Erin Merryn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erin-merryn/) > [“Being in a state of denial is a universally human response to situations which threaten to overwhelm. People who were abused as children sometimes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-e-olson/being-in-a-state-of-denial-is-a-universally-human-response-to/) Sarah E. Olson > [“Imagine the message that sent to my sister and me. A cousin violates us, confesses, and walks away with barely a slap on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erin-merryn/imagine-the-message-that-sent-to-my-sister-and-me-a-cousin-violates/) [Erin Merryn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erin-merryn/) > [“Does he win if I go?' A quiet, tentative question. 'You have to decide that for yourself.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/does-he-win-if-i-go-a-quiet-tentative-question-you-have-to-decide/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“While a psychiatric diagnosis can serve a purpose in treatment plans, it should not become a tool to discredit a person's disclosure of abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-ann-hoff/while-a-psychiatric-diagnosis-can-serve-a-purpose-in-treatment-plans/) Lee Ann Hoff > [“Controlling my environment was still a compelling need for me. I did everything I could to not be surprised by anything... Looking back, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/olga-trujillo/controlling-my-environment-was-still-a-compelling-need-for-me-i-did/) [Olga Trujillo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/olga-trujillo/) > [“This book is dedicated to those who have died as a result of mind control and/or ritual abuse, and those who have lived when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-miller/this-book-is-dedicated-to-those-who-have-died-as-a-result-of-mind/) [Alison Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-miller/) > [“She could do this. She was stronger now. This was her chance to prove it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/talena-winters/she-could-do-this-she-was-stronger-now-this-was-her-chance-to-prove-it/) Talena Winters > [“Desire had never done anything good in her life, so she had divorced it years ago.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/talena-winters/desire-had-never-done-anything-good-in-her-life-so-she-had-divorced/) Talena Winters [Browse all 21 Abuse-survivor quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse-survivor/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm never supposed to tell. But since I don't remember just what I'm supposed to keep secret, I'm afraid I'll tell it by mistake.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Frances Casey" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge-secret-that-i-m-never/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Abuse-survivor" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge-secret-that-i-m-never/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/joan-frances-casey-20220_abuse-survivor_it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge_1292981.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“It's like I'm carrying around this huge secret that I'm never supposed to tell. But since I don't remember…” — Joan Frances Casey", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Joan Frances Casey", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-frances-casey/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“It's like I'm carrying around this...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge-secret-that-i-m-never/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-frances-casey/it-s-like-i-m-carrying-around-this-huge-secret-that-i-m-never/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```