--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I've never been keen on open adoption. It…" description: "\"I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to solve the main problem with adoption, which is that somebody feels she was abandoned by someo..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg" --- # I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to… ![“I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to solve the main problem with adoption, which is that somebody feels she was abandoned by someone else.” quote by Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg) > “I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to solve the main problem with adoption, which is that somebody feels she was abandoned by someone else.” [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Adoption is framed as a solution to abandonment, but the core issue is the emotional experience of being left behind, not the legal status. **In simple terms:** Adoption doesn't fix feelings of abandonment. Key Takeaway Address emotional trauma, not just legal arrangements. Themes family dynamics psychology social stigma identity emotional health Mood reflective empathetic somber Type observation cautionary When to use this quote - a child coping with loss - a family considering adoption - a therapist counseling adoptees - a policy maker reviewing adoption law Key Concepts abandonment attachment legal vs emotional needs parental responsibility Practical Applications - counseling services for adoptees - training for adoptive parents on trauma-informed care Questions to Reflect On - How does the perception of abandonment affect adoption outcomes? - What support structures best address emotional needs post-adoption? A Different Perspective Adoption can provide stability and love, which may mitigate feelings of abandonment for some individuals. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abandoned](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abandoned/) [Adoption](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/adoption/) [Adoption Doesn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/adoption-doesn-755716/) [Adoption Somebody](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/adoption-somebody-755715/) [Feels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feels/) [Feels Abandoned](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feels-abandoned-755718/) [Never](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/never/) [Open](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/open/) [Open adoption](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/open-adoption/) [Problem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/problem/) [Problem Adoption](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/problem-adoption-755717/) [She](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/she/) [Solve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/solve/) ## Related quotes > [Somehow destiny comes into play. These children end up with you and you end up with them. It's something quite magical.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-kidman/somehow-destiny-comes-into-play-these-children-end-up-with-you-and/) [Nicole Kidman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-kidman/) > [Time and experience have taught me a priceless lesson: Any child you take for your own becomes your own if you give of yourself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dale-evans/time-and-experience-have-taught-me-a-priceless-lesson-any-child-you/) [Dale Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dale-evans/) > [The process of open adoption is not discussed in the way it should be. Everyone I know who has adopted domestically has at least…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-gilmore/the-process-of-open-adoption-is-not-discussed-in-the-way-it-should-be/) [Jennifer Gilmore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-gilmore/) > [“Adoption is a beautiful, burdensome blessing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jody-cantrell-dyer/adoption-is-a-beautiful-burdensome-blessing/) [Jody Cantrell Dyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jody-cantrell-dyer/) > [Open adoption, when it works, is fabulous. But when it goes wrong, it's so traumatizing for everybody.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caroline-leavitt/open-adoption-when-it-works-is-fabulous-but-when-it-goes-wrong-it-s/) [Caroline Leavitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caroline-leavitt/) > [I will say, in open adoption, all these choices you make about race, about the amount of mental illness you can deal with, about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-gilmore/i-will-say-in-open-adoption-all-these-choices-you-make-about-race/) [Jennifer Gilmore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-gilmore/) > [In an open adoption agreement, you agree to a minimum number of visits - a floor, not a ceiling. It's enforceable.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-savage/in-an-open-adoption-agreement-you-agree-to-a-minimum-number-of-visits/) [Dan Savage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-savage/) > [By choice, we have become a family, first in our hearts, and finally in breath and being. Great expectations are good; great experiences are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-w-fisher/by-choice-we-have-become-a-family-first-in-our-hearts-and-finally-in/) [Richard W. Fisher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-w-fisher/) > [I want to say that, in general, when it works, open adoption is great.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-gilmore/i-want-to-say-that-in-general-when-it-works-open-adoption-is-great/) [Jennifer Gilmore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-gilmore/) > [I finally had my beautiful baby girl. Her name is Michelle Lee. Ugh she's so perfect but unfortunately we're giving up for adoption. Well…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lexi/i-finally-had-my-beautiful-baby-girl-her-name-is-michelle-lee-ugh-she/) [Lexi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lexi/) > [“The more faithful I was to Him, the more faithful He was to me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/becky-graham/the-more-faithful-i-was-to-him-the-more-faithful-he-was-to-me/) [Becky Graham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/becky-graham/) > [Losing the future is the best thing that ever happened to me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marilyn-french/losing-the-future-is-the-best-thing-that-ever-happened-to-me/) [Marilyn French](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marilyn-french/) > [“No one 'just adopts'.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jody-cantrell-dyer/no-one-just-adopts/) [Jody Cantrell Dyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jody-cantrell-dyer/) > [I'm a big proponent of open adoption, because it allows a relationship between the birth mother and her child so that the kid isn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kathleen-hanna/i-m-a-big-proponent-of-open-adoption-because-it-allows-a-relationship/) [Kathleen Hanna](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kathleen-hanna/) > [Every child deserves a home and love. Period.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-thomas/every-child-deserves-a-home-and-love-period/) [Dave Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-thomas/) ## More by Joan Didion > [To shift the structure of a sentence alters the meaning of that sentence, as definitely and inflexibly as the position of a camera alters…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/to-shift-the-structure-of-a-sentence-alters-the-meaning-of-that/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [I work every day. Sometimes I don't accomplish anything every day, but if I don't work every day, I get depressed and get afraid…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-work-every-day-sometimes-i-don-t-accomplish-anything-every-day-but/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [Style is character.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/style-is-character/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [California is a place in which a boom mentality and a sense of Chekhovian loss meet in uneasy suspension.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/california-is-a-place-in-which-a-boom-mentality-and-a-sense-of/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“I went because I was interested in the alchemy of issues.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-went-because-i-was-interested-in-the-alchemy-of-issues/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“Why did I write it down? In order to remember, of course, but exactly what was it I wanted to remember? How much of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/why-did-i-write-it-down-in-order-to-remember-of-course-but-exactly/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [I no longer want reminders of what was, what got broken, what got lost, what got wasted.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-no-longer-want-reminders-of-what-was-what-got-broken-what-got-lost/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [My mother 'gave teas' the way other mothers breathed. Her own mother 'gave teas.' All of their friends 'gave teas,' each involving butter cookies…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/my-mother-gave-teas-the-way-other-mothers-breathed-her-own-mother/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [I'm not very interested in people. I recognize it in myself - there is a basic indifference toward people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-m-not-very-interested-in-people-i-recognize-it-in-myself-there-is-a/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“Was there ever in anyone's life span a point free in time, devoid of memory, a point when choice was any more than sum…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/was-there-ever-in-anyone-s-life-span-a-point-free-in-time-devoid-of/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“Research to date has shown that, like many other stressors, grief frequently leads to changes in the endocrine, immune, autonomic nervous, and cardiovascular systems;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/research-to-date-has-shown-that-like-many-other-stressors-grief/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“By the end of the week she was thinking constantly about where her body stopped and the air began about the exact point in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/by-the-end-of-the-week-she-was-thinking-constantly-about-where-her/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [“I just can't see the upside in this," I heard myself say by way of explanation. Later he said that if John had been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-just-can-t-see-the-upside-in-this-i-heard-myself-say-by-way-of/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [ I read so ravenously that I would read through whole categories. I was crazy about reading biographies. \[...\] I think biographies are very urgent… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-read-so-ravenously-that-i-would-read-through-whole-categories-i-was/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) > [To those of us who remained committed mainly to the exploration of moral distinctions and ambiguities, the feminist analysis may have seemed a particularly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/to-those-of-us-who-remained-committed-mainly-to-the-exploration-of/) [Joan Didion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) [Explore all 515 Joan Didion quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/) ## More Abandoned quotes > [“I'm surprised when I walk right into yet another abandoned hunters' camp. Tattered plastic sheeting still hangs askew here and there. Blackened aerosol cans…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-bass/i-m-surprised-when-i-walk-right-into-yet-another-abandoned-hunters/) [Rick Bass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-bass/) > [It’s hard to feel attracted to someone who has abandoned her sense of autonomy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-s-hard-to-feel-attracted-to-someone-who-has-abandoned-her-sense-of/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [When good media takes a bounded form, and comes once in a period of time, it begs to be consumed as a whole -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-battelle/when-good-media-takes-a-bounded-form-and-comes-once-in-a-period-of/) [John Battelle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-battelle/) > [In Russia there is an emigration of intelligence: émigrés cross the frontier in order to read and to write good books. But in doing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/friedrich-nietzsche/in-russia-there-is-an-emigration-of-intelligence-migr-s-cross-the/) [Friedrich Nietzsche](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/friedrich-nietzsche/) > [Early on in my life, I had a broken soul. I was abused by my father, abandoned by my mother and ended up in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joyce-meyer/early-on-in-my-life-i-had-a-broken-soul-i-was-abused-by-my-father/) [Joyce Meyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joyce-meyer/) > [We should be recklessly abandoned to Jesus, and just turn it over to Him. Through the support I think the sacrifices will be made…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stacie-orrico/we-should-be-recklessly-abandoned-to-jesus-and-just-turn-it-over-to/) [Stacie Orrico](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stacie-orrico/) > [In the eyes of those lovers of perfection, a work is never finished a word that for them has no sense but abandoned; and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-valery/in-the-eyes-of-those-lovers-of-perfection-a-work-is-never-finished-a/) [Paul Valery](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-valery/) > [The whole force of the respectable circles to which I belonged, that respectable circle which knew as I did notthe value of security won,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ida-tarbell/the-whole-force-of-the-respectable-circles-to-which-i-belonged-that/) [Ida Tarbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ida-tarbell/) > [Barack Obama became president, and he abandoned Iraq. He left, and when he left Al Qaida was done for. ISIS was created because of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeb-bush/barack-obama-became-president-and-he-abandoned-iraq-he-left-and-when/) [Jeb Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeb-bush/) > [“The desperate loneliness is nothing compared to the torture of falling in love and then being abandoned.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-j-nuest/the-desperate-loneliness-is-nothing-compared-to-the-torture-of/) [A.J. Nuest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-j-nuest/) > [Through it all, this wild life on and off the road , through Jordanian deserts , Spanish islands, German prisons, Caribbean tax scams, halls…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-burdon/through-it-all-this-wild-life-on-and-off-the-road-through-jordanian/) [Eric Burdon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-burdon/) > [Blacks abandoned morals, fathers, and real belief in God.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-lee-peterson/blacks-abandoned-morals-fathers-and-real-belief-in-god/) [Jesse Lee Peterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-lee-peterson/) > [I just feel abandoned. And I feel, I don't feel represented by the Republican Party. I have always had to defend the social side…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-johnson/i-just-feel-abandoned-and-i-feel-i-don-t-feel-represented-by-the/) [Gary Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-johnson/) > [While society cannot provide employment for its members, the production/work/income nexus has to be abandoned as a justification for our present parsimony to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bob-hawke/while-society-cannot-provide-employment-for-its-members-the/) [Bob Hawke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bob-hawke/) > [When I was in Philadelphia during the Depression in 1930 or '31, I got a very sad job as a night watchman in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-glazer/when-i-was-in-philadelphia-during-the-depression-in-1930-or-31-i-got/) [Tom Glazer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-glazer/) [Browse all 932 Abandoned quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abandoned/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to solve the main problem with adoption, which is that somebody feels she was abandoned by someone else.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Didion" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it-doesn-t-seem-to-solve-the/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Abandoned" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it-doesn-t-seem-to-solve-the/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3bf/joan-didion-497_abandoned_i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it_53839.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I've never been keen on open adoption. It doesn't seem to solve the main problem with adoption, which is…” — Joan Didion", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Joan Didion", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-didion/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I've never been keen on open...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it-doesn-t-seem-to-solve-the/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-didion/i-ve-never-been-keen-on-open-adoption-it-doesn-t-seem-to-solve-the/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```