--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If God had wanted us to use the metric…" description: "\"If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles.\" — Jesse Helms" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png" --- # If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would… ![“If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles.” quote by Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png) > “If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles.” [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The speaker jokes that if God wanted the metric system, the number of apostles would differ, implying religious texts aren’t scientific manuals. **In simple terms:** God didn’t design measurement systems. Key Takeaway Question assumptions. Themes religion science humor Mood witty critical Type satirical philosophical When to use this quote - debates on science vs religion - education curricula Key Concepts metrics faith logic Questions to Reflect On - Is humor effective for critique? - When is satire appropriate? A Different Perspective Humor may oversimplify complex topics. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Apostles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/apostles/) [Jesus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jesus/) [Metric system](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/metric-system/) [Metrics](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/metrics/) ## Related quotes > [I don't understand why a 40 is a quarter of beer when a 40 is 40 ounces. It's time to embrace the metric system.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greg-gutfeld/i-don-t-understand-why-a-40-is-a-quarter-of-beer-when-a-40-is-40/) [Greg Gutfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greg-gutfeld/) > [Nobody in the United States knows what either a "meter" or a "kilogram" is. The whole reason why we fought the Cold War was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/nobody-in-the-united-states-knows-what-either-a-meter-or-a-kilogram/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [God invented man, and man invented the metric system.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/salvador-dali/god-invented-man-and-man-invented-the-metric-system/) [Salvador Dali](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/salvador-dali/) > [The most lasting and universal consequence of the French revolution is the metric system](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-hobsbawm/the-most-lasting-and-universal-consequence-of-the-french-revolution/) [Eric Hobsbawm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-hobsbawm/) > [ In the heavens we discover \[stars\] by their light, and by their light alone ... the sole evidence of the existence of these distant… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-clerk-maxwell/in-the-heavens-we-discover-stars-by-their-light-and-by-their-light/) [James Clerk Maxwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-clerk-maxwell/) > [Of course Evil's afoot. If it had switched to the metric system it'd be up to a meter by now.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-butcher/of-course-evil-s-afoot-if-it-had-switched-to-the-metric-system-it-d/) [Jim Butcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-butcher/) > [If god had meant us to use the metric system he would have given us ten finger and ten toes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-stone/if-god-had-meant-us-to-use-the-metric-system-he-would-have-given-us/) [Judith Stone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-stone/) > [The metric system was designed to get people to enter charity runs.Do you think you would go run a 3.1 mile race? No, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greg-gutfeld/the-metric-system-was-designed-to-get-people-to-enter-charity-runs-do/) [Greg Gutfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greg-gutfeld/) > [There was a sound like a human yawn, and then the skull turned slightly toward me and asked, "What's up, boss?" "Evil's afoot." "Well,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-butcher/there-was-a-sound-like-a-human-yawn-and-then-the-skull-turned/) [Jim Butcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-butcher/) > [“The only measurement I understand is perfection.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amit-kalantri/the-only-measurement-i-understand-is-perfection/) [Amit Kalantri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amit-kalantri/) > [Drugs have taught an entire generation of kids the metric system](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/drugs-have-taught-an-entire-generation-of-kids-the-metric-system/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The weightlifting competition I saw was the women's 63 kg class. I'm not sure whether this means the actual women weighed 63 kg or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-weightlifting-competition-i-saw-was-the-women-s-63-kg-class-i-m/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [If God had meant us to go metric, why did he give Christ twelve apostles?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gyles-brandreth/if-god-had-meant-us-to-go-metric-why-did-he-give-christ-twelve/) [Gyles Brandreth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gyles-brandreth/) > [“The metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-metric-system-did-not-really-catch-on-in-the-states-unless-you/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [“Money is just like the metric system: you work more, you earn more and there’s always an extra zero to be added. It’s only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/luca-pesaro/money-is-just-like-the-metric-system-you-work-more-you-earn-more-and/) Luca Pesaro ## More by Jesse Helms > [Compromise, hell! That's what has happened to us all down the line -- and that's the very cause of our woes. If freedom is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/compromise-hell-that-s-what-has-happened-to-us-all-down-the-line-and/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [I fight for what I believe. If you are not willing to stand up for what you believe, your beliefs are not strong enough.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/i-fight-for-what-i-believe-if-you-are-not-willing-to-stand-up-for/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [The interests of the United States are better served by demanding reform and seeing that reform takes place than by removing our influence from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/the-interests-of-the-united-states-are-better-served-by-demanding/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [Democracy used to be a good thing, but now it has gotten into the wrong hands.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/democracy-used-to-be-a-good-thing-but-now-it-has-gotten-into-the/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [I have tried at every point to seek God's wisdom on the decisions I made, and I made it my business to speak up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/i-have-tried-at-every-point-to-seek-god-s-wisdom-on-the-decisions-i/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [This is an area where North Carolina does excel. I have known more colorful North Carolina political figures than I have colorless ones.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/this-is-an-area-where-north-carolina-does-excel-i-have-known-more/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [I do not intend to allow the Senate to rubber-stamp the president's plan to reward the Chinese Communists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/i-do-not-intend-to-allow-the-senate-to-rubber-stamp-the-president-s/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [They should ask their parents if it would be all right for their son or daughter to marry a Negro.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/they-should-ask-their-parents-if-it-would-be-all-right-for-their-son/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [It's their deliberate, disgusting, revolting conduct that is responsible for the disease](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/it-s-their-deliberate-disgusting-revolting-conduct-that-is/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [The challenge is always before us. Whenever we lose sight of the principles that mattered to our founders we run into trouble.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/the-challenge-is-always-before-us-whenever-we-lose-sight-of-the/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [If you want to call me a bigot, fine.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/if-you-want-to-call-me-a-bigot-fine/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [The New York Times and Washington Post are both infested with homosexuals themselves. Just about every person down there is a homosexual or lesbian.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/the-new-york-times-and-washington-post-are-both-infested-with/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [White people, wake up before it is too late. Do you want Negroes working beside you, your wife and your daughters, in your mills…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/white-people-wake-up-before-it-is-too-late-do-you-want-negroes/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [I became a Republican when a very wise young lady asked me how I could remain a Democrat when I didn't agree with what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/i-became-a-republican-when-a-very-wise-young-lady-asked-me-how-i/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) > [I worked in the media from the late 30's through the early 70's. Politics in general became more liberal both nationally and within the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/i-worked-in-the-media-from-the-late-30-s-through-the-early-70-s/) [Jesse Helms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) [Explore all 50 Jesse Helms quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/) ## More Apostles quotes > [The writings of latter-day prophets clearly teach that the sorrows and sufferings endured by Adam and Eve upon their leaving the Garden of Eden…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-k-judd/the-writings-of-latter-day-prophets-clearly-teach-that-the-sorrows/) Daniel K Judd > [As a Fundamentalist I had discovered while I was in college that it is possible to dismiss the entire Church as having gone off…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-howard-3rd-duke-of-norfolk/as-a-fundamentalist-i-had-discovered-while-i-was-in-college-that-it/) Thomas Howard, 3rd Duke of Norfolk > [Amidst the flood of dangerous reading, I plead for my Master's book; I call upon you not to forget the book of the soul.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-c-ryle/amidst-the-flood-of-dangerous-reading-i-plead-for-my-master-s-book-i/) [J. C. Ryle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-c-ryle/) > [When we look at the love of Christ, we make a wonderful discovery. Love is more a decision than an emotion! Christ-like love applauds…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/max-lucado/when-we-look-at-the-love-of-christ-we-make-a-wonderful-discovery-love/) [Max Lucado](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/max-lucado/) > [“I argue that the Jesus of the Gospels is essentially a myth. The Gospels are largely fiction. They were created around the turn of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alvar-elleg-rd/i-argue-that-the-jesus-of-the-gospels-is-essentially-a-myth-the/) Alvar Ellegård > [the Republicans love to say that the Democratic Party is ruled by 'special interests.' But when pressed to name these 'special interests,' the usual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/geraldine-ferraro/the-republicans-love-to-say-that-the-democratic-party-is-ruled-by/) [Geraldine Ferraro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/geraldine-ferraro/) > [The Apostle John said, " Beloved, now we are the sons of God." He didn't say by and by we are going to become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ernest-holmes/the-apostle-john-said-beloved-now-we-are-the-sons-of-god-he-didn-t/) [Ernest Holmes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ernest-holmes/) > [The first duty of a Christian, of a disciple and follower of Jesus Christ, is to deny himself. To deny oneself means to give…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/innocent-of-alaska/the-first-duty-of-a-christian-of-a-disciple-and-follower-of-jesus/) Innocent of Alaska > [The gifts that Yeshua left in the earth realm to enforce His authority were apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, and evangelists. The gift that gets…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chuck-pierce/the-gifts-that-yeshua-left-in-the-earth-realm-to-enforce-his/) [Chuck Pierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chuck-pierce/) > [... faithfully and strenuously you should resist the heretics in defense of the only true and life-giving faith, which the Church has received -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-clement-i/faithfully-and-strenuously-you-should-resist-the-heretics-in-defense/) [Pope Clement I](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-clement-i/) > [ Listen to these words of \[apostle\] Paul: "We war not against flesh and blood, but against principalities and powers, and the rulers of the… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-farrakhan/listen-to-these-words-of-apostle-paul-we-war-not-against-flesh-and/) [Louis Farrakhan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-farrakhan/) > [Our Lord Jesus Christ, a little before his departure, commissioned his apostles to Go, and teach all nations; or, as another evangelist expresses it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-carey/our-lord-jesus-christ-a-little-before-his-departure-commissioned-his/) [William Carey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-carey/) > [What cursed spirit of falsehood moveth priests to close themselves within stone walls for all their life, since Christ commanded all his apostles and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-wycliffe/what-cursed-spirit-of-falsehood-moveth-priests-to-close-themselves/) [John Wycliffe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-wycliffe/) > [...it is proper that the duty of helping the poor and unfortunate should especially stir Catholics, since they are members of the Mystical Body…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-john-xxii/it-is-proper-that-the-duty-of-helping-the-poor-and-unfortunate-should/) [Pope John XXII](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-john-xxii/) > [“The Ancient Church Fathers, including disciples of the twelve apostles, were firmly premillennial, pretribulational, and very pro-Israel.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ken-johnson/the-ancient-church-fathers-including-disciples-of-the-twelve-apostles/) Ken Johnson [Browse all 366 Apostles quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/apostles/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jesse Helms" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-system-jesus-would-have-had-10/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Apostles" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-system-jesus-would-have-had-10/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1da/jesse-helms-13503_apostles_if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-s_1348713.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles.” — Jesse Helms", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jesse Helms", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesse-helms/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "If God had wanted us to...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-system-jesus-would-have-had-10/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesse-helms/if-god-had-wanted-us-to-use-the-metric-system-jesus-would-have-had-10/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```