--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Through the process of specifically…" description: "\"Through the process of specifically writing this memoir, there was so much reckoning that I had to do. It was very difficult. It doesn't erase anything..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/jesmyn-ward-1426_brother_through-the-process-of-specifically-writ_2108997.png" --- # Through the process of specifically writing this memoir… ![“Through the process of specifically writing this memoir, there was so much reckoning that I had to do. It was very difficult. It doesn't erase anything that happened, but I think that it was healthy for me to do it. The teenage self-loathing that I suffered from all of a sudden found itself turned…” quote by Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/jesmyn-ward-1426_brother_through-the-process-of-specifically-writ_2108997.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/jesmyn-ward-1426_brother_through-the-process-of-specifically-writ_2108997.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a93/jesmyn-ward-1426_brother_through-the-process-of-specifically-writ_2108997.png) > “Through the process of specifically writing this memoir, there was so much reckoning that I had to do. It was very difficult. It doesn't erase anything that happened, but I think that it was healthy for me to do it. The teenage self-loathing that I suffered from all of a sudden found itself turned into rapids with my grief after my brother died. I turned it inwards. In the same way that my mom processes her grief and her problems. This project, as a memoir, has helped me funnel it outwards.” [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Writing a memoir forced the author to confront deep grief and self‑loathing, turning inward pain into an outward, healing narrative. **In simple terms:** Facing grief through writing can transform inner turmoil into growth. Key Takeaway Use writing to process and release trauma. Themes grief self‑reflection healing writing Mood reflective hopeful Type personal therapeutic When to use this quote - therapy sessions - personal journaling - support groups - creative writing workshops Key Concepts trauma processing emotional catharsis narrative therapy Questions to Reflect On - How can storytelling change your relationship to loss? - What emotions surface when you write about pain? A Different Perspective Writing may not change past events, only personal perception. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Brother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brother/) [Brother died](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brother-died/) [Died](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/died/) [Difficult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/difficult/) [Erase](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/erase/) [Found](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/found/) [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Happened](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happened/) [Healthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/healthy/) [Loathing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loathing/) [Memoir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memoir/) [Memoir Helped](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memoir-helped-4249193/) [Memoir Reckoning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/memoir-reckoning-4249194/) [Mom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mom/) [My brother](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/my-brother/) [My brother died](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/my-brother-died-127679/) [My mom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/my-mom/) [Problem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/problem/) [Process](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/process/) [Processes Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/processes-grief-4249195/) [Projects](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/projects/) [Rapids](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rapids/) [Reckoning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reckoning/) [Self](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self/) [Self loathing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/self-loathing/) [Teenage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/teenage/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) [Way](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/) [Writing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/writing/) [Writing Memoir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/writing-memoir-868555/) ## Related quotes > [I died upon that mountain. There is no question. A part of me will forever be upon that mountain. Dead. That's my brothers died.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcus-luttrell/i-died-upon-that-mountain-there-is-no-question-a-part-of-me-will/) [Marcus Luttrell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcus-luttrell/) > [My brother died of cancer two years ago (1998), renal cell carcinoma. He was my only real brother and I didn't know what to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/quincy-jones/my-brother-died-of-cancer-two-years-ago-1998-renal-cell-carcinoma-he/) [Quincy Jones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/quincy-jones/) > [Ironically my brother died in a car accident shortly after Airbag was recorded. He's not an identical twin so I didn't care.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thom-yorke/ironically-my-brother-died-in-a-car-accident-shortly-after-airbag-was/) [Thom Yorke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thom-yorke/) > [When I was writing the memoir, every page was a battle with myself because I knew I had to tell the truth. That's what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/when-i-was-writing-the-memoir-every-page-was-a-battle-with-myself/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [My brother died when he was 19, so a part of me indulges and thinks that some part of him that made him uniquely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/my-brother-died-when-he-was-19-so-a-part-of-me-indulges-and-thinks/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [I was not sorry when my brother died](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tsitsi-dangarembga/i-was-not-sorry-when-my-brother-died/) [Tsitsi Dangarembga](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tsitsi-dangarembga/) > [I had a lot of issues in my life after my brother died in 1972, that I carried through to my adult life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nigel-benn/i-had-a-lot-of-issues-in-my-life-after-my-brother-died-in-1972-that-i/) [Nigel Benn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nigel-benn/) > [“I need you, Teft,” Kaladin said. “I said—” “Not your food. You. Your loyalty. Your allegiance.” The older man continued to eat. He didn’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brandon-sanderson/i-need-you-teft-kaladin-said-i-said-not-your-food-you-your-loyalty/) [Brandon Sanderson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brandon-sanderson/) > [This is my baby boy. I sold is other brother and my aunt has his other other brother. This baby's other other other brother…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cowgirl-haley00/this-is-my-baby-boy-i-sold-is-other-brother-and-my-aunt-has-his-other/) [Cowgirl\_Haley00](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cowgirl-haley00/) > [I knew about my grandmother's husband who died in the Albion coal disaster. But I didn't know a brother died in the same disaster…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakin-stevens/i-knew-about-my-grandmother-s-husband-who-died-in-the-albion-coal/) [Shakin' Stevens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakin-stevens/) > [“According to folk belief that is reflected in the stories and poems, a being who is petrified man and he can revive. In fairy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/penina-mezei/according-to-folk-belief-that-is-reflected-in-the-stories-and-poems-a/) [Penina Mezei](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/penina-mezei/) > [Since my brother died in 1982, my parents and I had formed a shaky tripod of a family; now that I'd lost my father…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ann-hood/since-my-brother-died-in-1982-my-parents-and-i-had-formed-a-shaky/) [Ann Hood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ann-hood/) > [“I could’ve gone on and on but the truth was all that mattered. “My brother died because someone was jealous.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-anderson-kurk/i-could-ve-gone-on-and-on-but-the-truth-was-all-that-mattered-my/) [Laura Anderson Kurk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-anderson-kurk/) > [I have one brother, John, an airline pilot, who is seven years younger. He's adopted, though we're still blood related - he's my cousin.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-numan/i-have-one-brother-john-an-airline-pilot-who-is-seven-years-younger/) [Gary Numan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-numan/) > [“One day, a shadow will come to my door. He will push his head back and scuff the dirt with one heel, and he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-anderson-coats-2/one-day-a-shadow-will-come-to-my-door-he-will-push-his-head-back-and/) [J Anderson Coats](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-anderson-coats-2/) ## More by Jesmyn Ward > [I wanted to write about voodoo tradition that I feel has been very important to survival of black people here: people of the African…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/i-wanted-to-write-about-voodoo-tradition-that-i-feel-has-been-very/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [I think that voodoo as a spiritual tradition has been demonized for so long in popular culture. I wanted to write against that and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/i-think-that-voodoo-as-a-spiritual-tradition-has-been-demonized-for/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [There's so much I love about home, but then there's a lot that I can acknowledge that I dislike about home. And acknowledging that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/there-s-so-much-i-love-about-home-but-then-there-s-a-lot-that-i-can/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [“The dream of her was the glow of a spent fire on a cold night: warm and welcoming.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/the-dream-of-her-was-the-glow-of-a-spent-fire-on-a-cold-night-warm/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [The first writer that I think of immediately that I studied with at Michigan is Peter Ho Davies. He was really important to me,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/the-first-writer-that-i-think-of-immediately-that-i-studied-with-at/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [I feel like so much of what happened in the Delta over the decades since slavery was abolished seems much closer in the Delta,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/i-feel-like-so-much-of-what-happened-in-the-delta-over-the-decades/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [“Vines catch my arms, my head; we tear through until we break out into the clearing before the fence, the field, the barn, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/vines-catch-my-arms-my-head-we-tear-through-until-we-break-out-into/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [“Before all the little mean things she told me gathered and gathered and lodged like grit in a skinned knee.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/before-all-the-little-mean-things-she-told-me-gathered-and-gathered/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [People give the South a bad rap. It's often stereotyped as backwards and close-minded and dogmatic, and all of those things have been true.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/people-give-the-south-a-bad-rap-it-s-often-stereotyped-as-backwards/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [By the time I wrote my memoir, 'Men We Reaped,' I had been running from writing it for a long time. When the events…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/by-the-time-i-wrote-my-memoir-men-we-reaped-i-had-been-running-from/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [When I was a teenager, I was the only black girl at a small, private Episcopal school, where my tuition was paid by the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/when-i-was-a-teenager-i-was-the-only-black-girl-at-a-small-private/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [She was the murderous mother who cut us to the bone but left us alive, left us naked and bewildered as wrinkled newborn babies,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/she-was-the-murderous-mother-who-cut-us-to-the-bone-but-left-us-alive/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [I hope people who read my books feel empathy for us and really see us as complicated people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/i-hope-people-who-read-my-books-feel-empathy-for-us-and-really-see-us/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [When I was writing my first novel, 'Where the Line Bleeds,' which had young black men as its main characters, I was very invested…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/when-i-was-writing-my-first-novel-where-the-line-bleeds-which-had/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) > [“Lot of folks was in there for stealing food because everybody was poor and starving, and even though White people couldn’t get your work…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jesmyn-ward/lot-of-folks-was-in-there-for-stealing-food-because-everybody-was/) [Jesmyn Ward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) [Explore all 242 Jesmyn Ward quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jesmyn-ward/) ## More Brother quotes > [I was 3-years-old - to this day it is a vivid memory. My family and I were on a boat, catching fish. As one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joaquin-phoenix/i-was-3-years-old-to-this-day-it-is-a-vivid-memory-my-family-and-i/) [Joaquin Phoenix](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joaquin-phoenix/) > [Whatever meaning 'Annie's Song' had for me on a personal level, there was also a larger context. It could just as easily have been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-denver/whatever-meaning-annie-s-song-had-for-me-on-a-personal-level-there/) [John Denver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-denver/) > [Luckily, the bullet that hit my chest never got to me. It was stopped by a silver case I got for my brother's wedding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-doohan/luckily-the-bullet-that-hit-my-chest-never-got-to-me-it-was-stopped/) [James Doohan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-doohan/) > [“Yeah. You treat him like a son or a soldier, instead of like a brother. He wants you to like him and admire him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/faith-hunter/yeah-you-treat-him-like-a-son-or-a-soldier-instead-of-like-a-brother/) [Faith Hunter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/faith-hunter/) > [“Your relationship with your brother will be, in many ways, the most complex and bewildering of all the interpersonal connections you will form. An…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ron-currie-jr/your-relationship-with-your-brother-will-be-in-many-ways-the-most/) [Ron Currie Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ron-currie-jr/) > [If I had my brothers I think with just a little bit of the correct marketing, I'd like to be almost exclusively in small…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-bozzio/if-i-had-my-brothers-i-think-with-just-a-little-bit-of-the-correct/) [Terry Bozzio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-bozzio/) > [There's no publicist, no advertisements, and no one's pushing us. If people are buying our records, it's because big brothers and sisters or friends…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/spencer-moody/there-s-no-publicist-no-advertisements-and-no-one-s-pushing-us-if/) [Spencer Moody](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/spencer-moody/) > [The only way to make sure that the Hand didn't get to you would have been to kill your brother. I could've done it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ilona-andrews/the-only-way-to-make-sure-that-the-hand-didn-t-get-to-you-would-have/) [Ilona Andrews](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ilona-andrews/) > [“Your favorite son and brother, Shade. Like”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victoria-aveyard/your-favorite-son-and-brother-shade-like/) [Victoria Aveyard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victoria-aveyard/) > [Sister + brother = a lovely family](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sister-brother-a-lovely-family/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [There ain't no such thing as black Muslims. That's how they tried to cut off all my brothers in the rest of the world…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/muhammad-ali/there-ain-t-no-such-thing-as-black-muslims-that-s-how-they-tried-to/) [Muhammad Ali](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/muhammad-ali/) > [Brothers and Sisters, I bid you beware Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rudyard-kipling/brothers-and-sisters-i-bid-you-beware-of-giving-your-heart-to-a-dog/) [Rudyard Kipling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rudyard-kipling/) > [Like a child exploring the attic of an old house on a rainy day, discovering a trunk full of treasure and then calling all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eugene-h-peterson/like-a-child-exploring-the-attic-of-an-old-house-on-a-rainy-day/) [Eugene H. Peterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eugene-h-peterson/) > [Stephanie could see the greed seep into the watery eyes of her father’s other brother, a horrible little man called Fergus, as he nodded…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/derek-landy/stephanie-could-see-the-greed-seep-into-the-watery-eyes-of-her-father/) [Derek Landy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/derek-landy/) > [I worked in a barbershop. I used to make the waves in the brother's hair, you know? Like, Nat King Cole, Sugar Ray Robinson.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-clinton/i-worked-in-a-barbershop-i-used-to-make-the-waves-in-the-brother-s/) [George Clinton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-clinton/) [Browse all 7,453 Brother quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brother/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Through the process of specifically writing this memoir, there was so much reckoning that I had to do. It was very difficult. 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