--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Because the truth was, and we both knew…" description: "\"“Because the truth was, and we both knew it, he'd gone long, long ago. I'd just made him stick around when he really wanted to be somewhere else. In hi..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d36/jennifer-brown-10248_daughter_because-the-truth-was-and-we-both-knew-i_1230620.jpg" --- # Because the truth was, and we both knew it, he'd gone… ![“Because the truth was, and we both knew it, he'd gone long, long ago. I'd just made him stick around when he really wanted to be somewhere else. In his own weird way, he was another victim of the shooting, One of the ones who couldn't get away. "Are you mad?" he asked, which I thought was a really…” quote by Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d36/jennifer-brown-10248_daughter_because-the-truth-was-and-we-both-knew-i_1230620.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d36/jennifer-brown-10248_daughter_because-the-truth-was-and-we-both-knew-i_1230620.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d36/jennifer-brown-10248_daughter_because-the-truth-was-and-we-both-knew-i_1230620.jpg) > ““Because the truth was, and we both knew it, he'd gone long, long ago. I'd just made him stick around when he really wanted to be somewhere else. In his own weird way, he was another victim of the shooting, One of the ones who couldn't get away. "Are you mad?" he asked, which I thought was a really strange question. "Yes," I said. And I was. It's just that I wasn't so sure I was mad at him. But I don't think he needed to hear that part. I don't think he wanted to hear that part. I think it was important to him to hear that I cared enough to be angry. "Will you ever forgive me?" he asked. "Will you ever forgive me?" I shot back, leveling my gaze directly into his eyes. He stared into them for a few moments then got up silently and headed for the door. He didn't turn around when he reached it. Just grabbed the doorknob and held it. "No," he said without facing me. "Maybe that makes me a bad parent, but I don't know if I can. No matter what the police found, you were involved in that shooting, Valerie. You wrote those names on that list. You wrote my name on that list. You had a good life here. You might not have pulled the trigger, but you helped cause the tragedy." He opened the door."I'm sorry. I really am." He stepped out into the hallway. "I'll leave my new address and phone number with your mother," he said before walking slowly out of my sight.”” [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A character confronts guilt and seeks forgiveness, revealing deep emotional conflict and the burden of past actions. **In simple terms:** A person asks for forgiveness while feeling angry and guilty. Key Takeaway Acknowledge pain and seek honest dialogue. Themes guilt forgiveness family conflict responsibility Mood conflicted reflective somber Type dialogue emotional dramatic When to use this quote - family confrontation - confession - seeking redemption - processing grief - parent-child tension Key Concepts psychology morality trauma Questions to Reflect On - What does true forgiveness require? - How can one balance anger and care? A Different Perspective The narrative may dramatize events, making it hard to verify factual accuracy. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Bad parent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-parent/) [Daughter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/daughter/) [Divorce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/divorce/) [Father](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/father/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Good life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/good-life/) [Long ago](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/long-ago/) [Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents/) [School shooting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/school-shooting/) [Truth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/truth/) ## Related quotes > [“Will you ever forgive me? " I shot back, leveling my gaze directly into his eyes. He stared into them for a few moments…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/will-you-ever-forgive-me-i-shot-back-leveling-my-gaze-directly-into/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [They say that when god was in Jerusalem he forgave his murderers, but now he will not forgive an honest man for differing with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-green-ingersoll/they-say-that-when-god-was-in-jerusalem-he-forgave-his-murderers-but/) [Robert Green Ingersoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-green-ingersoll/) > [“I am beginning to think there are two kinds of people," she said. I waited. "Those who forgive themselves too easily but will not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deb-caletti/i-am-beginning-to-think-there-are-two-kinds-of-people-she-said-i/) [Deb Caletti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deb-caletti/) > [“You may not have pulled the trigger, but you helped cause the tragedy.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/you-may-not-have-pulled-the-trigger-but-you-helped-cause-the-tragedy/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [You can forgive if the shot is not right, or the lighting is a bit off, but not if the writing is bad.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/moran-atias/you-can-forgive-if-the-shot-is-not-right-or-the-lighting-is-a-bit-off/) [Moran Atias](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/moran-atias/) > [“Life isn't fair. A fair's a place where you eat corn dogs and ride the ferris wheel.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/life-isn-t-fair-a-fair-s-a-place-where-you-eat-corn-dogs-and-ride-the/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I understand that it would be easier for you to think of him as a hero. But, Valerie, he did kill a lot of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-understand-that-it-would-be-easier-for-you-to-think-of-him-as-a/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“His fingers gouged into my leg harder. "My sister was in that cafeteria," he said. "She saw her friends die, thanks to you and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/his-fingers-gouged-into-my-leg-harder-my-sister-was-in-that-cafeteria/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [I took a long breath, wiped my tears, kept my head up, put my heels on and told him it's fine I forgive you..…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-grabil/i-took-a-long-breath-wiped-my-tears-kept-my-head-up-put-my-heels-on/) [Katie Grabil](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-grabil/) > [“Josh had said the only difference between the church girls and me was that they had been forgive. Even after I'd asked for it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-quigley/josh-had-said-the-only-difference-between-the-church-girls-and-me-was/) Nicole Quigley > [“Real christians always forgive before they are asked for forgiveness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alin-sav/real-christians-always-forgive-before-they-are-asked-for-forgiveness/) [Alin Sav](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alin-sav/) > [For me it's NOT to, It's Forgive; As Given it's NOT you Forgiven - Syed Sharukh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/syed-sharukh/for-me-it-s-not-to-it-s-forgive-as-given-it-s-not-you-forgiven-syed/) [Syed Sharukh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/syed-sharukh/) > [“You made me hate the person I was becoming—only because you wanted me to—and for that, you will never be forgiven.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ahmed-mostafa/you-made-me-hate-the-person-i-was-becoming-only-because-you-wanted-me/) [Ahmed Mostafa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ahmed-mostafa/) > [“Killers could never be forgiven by their victims.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/toba-beta/killers-could-never-be-forgiven-by-their-victims/) [Toba Beta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/toba-beta/) > [It is unfortunate that in most cases when the sins of the father fall on the son it is because unlike God, people refuse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/it-is-unfortunate-that-in-most-cases-when-the-sins-of-the-father-fall/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Jennifer Brown > [“I've been thinking a lot about the word "everything." Whenever something horrible happens, you hear people say they "lost everything." They lost their house…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-ve-been-thinking-a-lot-about-the-word-everything-whenever-something/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“People hate. That's our reality.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/people-hate-that-s-our-reality/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I couldn't make myself imagine Dad holding some creamy-faced baby, cooing at it, telling it he loved it. Taking it to baseball games. Living…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-couldn-t-make-myself-imagine-dad-holding-some-creamy-faced-baby/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“Why are you so determined to make me out to be the bad guy all the time?” I stared at the side of his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/why-are-you-so-determined-to-make-me-out-to-be-the-bad-guy-all-the/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I didn't say anything at all, because somehow saying nothing seemed more humane than giving him all these reassurances.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-didn-t-say-anything-at-all-because-somehow-saying-nothing-seemed/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“...But would that be enough? Because at the moment it felt like it could never be enough. People needed more than a place to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/but-would-that-be-enough-because-at-the-moment-it-felt-like-it-could/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I thought everything I knew about you might have been a lie, but since meeting him and your parents, I've realized that the parts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-thought-everything-i-knew-about-you-might-have-been-a-lie-but-since/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I don’t know if it’s possible to take hate away from people. Not even people like us, who’ve seen firsthand what hate can do.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-don-t-know-if-it-s-possible-to-take-hate-away-from-people-not-even/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“Just concentrate on being in the moment”, he said. “Don’t read into things. See what’s really there ok?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/just-concentrate-on-being-in-the-moment-he-said-don-t-read-into/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“I understand that it would be easier for you to think of him as a hero. But, Valerie, he did kill a lot of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/i-understand-that-it-would-be-easier-for-you-to-think-of-him-as-a/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“It was one of the constants of life. You are born, you die, you stand up when the bus doors open.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/it-was-one-of-the-constants-of-life-you-are-born-you-die-you-stand-up/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“Sometimes even stuff you expect to happen can still hurt”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/sometimes-even-stuff-you-expect-to-happen-can-still-hurt/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“...we didn't know...the reality of who those people were.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/we-didn-t-know-the-reality-of-who-those-people-were/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“Will you ever forgive me? " I shot back, leveling my gaze directly into his eyes. He stared into them for a few moments…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/will-you-ever-forgive-me-i-shot-back-leveling-my-gaze-directly-into/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) > [“Just like there's always time for pain, there's always time for healing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-brown/just-like-there-s-always-time-for-pain-there-s-always-time-for-healing/) [Jennifer Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) [Explore all 67 Jennifer Brown quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-brown/) ## More Bad parent quotes > [I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad's room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/i-saw-this-anti-drug-commercial-that-showed-a-kid-smoking-pot-in-his/) [Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/) > [One thing I know is that it is a bad idea to marry someone who had bad parents. If they hated their mother, if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-gilchrist/one-thing-i-know-is-that-it-is-a-bad-idea-to-marry-someone-who-had/) [Ellen Gilchrist](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-gilchrist/) > [“I wonder now about Demeter and Persephone. Maybe Persephone was glad to run off with the king of death to his underground realm, maybe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-solnit/i-wonder-now-about-demeter-and-persephone-maybe-persephone-was-glad/) [Rebecca Solnit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-solnit/) > [“Bad emotions, bad parents, and bad feedback have more impact than good ones, and bad information is processed more thoroughly than good. The”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-kahneman/bad-emotions-bad-parents-and-bad-feedback-have-more-impact-than-good/) [Daniel Kahneman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-kahneman/) > [I'm not a bad parent and partner, even if I make a thousand mistakes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/diane-lane/i-m-not-a-bad-parent-and-partner-even-if-i-make-a-thousand-mistakes/) [Diane Lane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/diane-lane/) > [“I do not think God makes bad things happen just so that people can grow spiritually. Bad parents do that. Bad parents make things…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-moon/i-do-not-think-god-makes-bad-things-happen-just-so-that-people-can/) [Elizabeth Moon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-moon/) > [“He wished he understood where they come from: all the terrorists, religious revolutionists and hate-criminals. Did terrorizing entire communities of people help them sleep…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thisuri-wanniarachchi/he-wished-he-understood-where-they-come-from-all-the-terrorists/) [Thisuri Wanniarachchi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thisuri-wanniarachchi/) > [Bad parents think it's everyone else's fault and responsibility when little Joey or Jane turns out to be a societal nightmare. Good parents do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/bad-parents-think-it-s-everyone-else-s-fault-and-responsibility-when/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“The men and women on death row have some combination of bad genes, bad parents, bad environments, and bad ideas (and the innocent, of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sam-harris/the-men-and-women-on-death-row-have-some-combination-of-bad-genes-bad/) [Sam Harris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sam-harris/) > [You can say I will be a bad parent, but at least I won't dress them in Aeropostale.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-can-say-i-will-be-a-bad-parent-but-at-least-i-won-t-dress-them-in/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [You take responsibility for your children but you're not always the taxi driver and that doesn't make you a bad parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karren-brady/you-take-responsibility-for-your-children-but-you-re-not-always-the/) [Karren Brady](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karren-brady/) > [Stop blaming your child's behavioral problems on the media. You're just a bad parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/stop-blaming-your-child-s-behavioral-problems-on-the-media-you-re/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [There are hundreds of millions of gun owners in this country, and not one of them will have an accident today. The only misuse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ted-nugent/there-are-hundreds-of-millions-of-gun-owners-in-this-country-and-not/) [Ted Nugent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ted-nugent/) > [Sometimes I have really bad days of being a bad parent, but who doesn't? I know I'm not perfect nor ever will be, just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sometimes-i-have-really-bad-days-of-being-a-bad-parent-but-who-doesn/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [My guess is that good and bad parenting is spread fairly evenly across different social groups. But can you imagine Tony Blair lecturing the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-jacques/my-guess-is-that-good-and-bad-parenting-is-spread-fairly-evenly/) [Martin Jacques](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-jacques/) [Browse all 69 Bad parent quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-parent/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Because the truth was, and we both knew it, he'd gone long, long ago. I'd just made him stick around when he really wanted to be somewhere else. In his own weird way, he was another victim of the shooting, One of the ones who couldn't get away. \"Are you mad?\" he asked, which I thought was a really strange question. \"Yes,\" I said. And I was. It's just that I wasn't so sure I was mad at him. But I don't think he needed to hear that part. I don't think he wanted to hear that part. I think it was important to him to hear that I cared enough to be angry. \"Will you ever forgive me?\" he asked. \"Will you ever forgive me?\" I shot back, leveling my gaze directly into his eyes. He stared into them for a few moments then got up silently and headed for the door. He didn't turn around when he reached it. Just grabbed the doorknob and held it. \"No,\" he said without facing me. \"Maybe that makes me a bad parent, but I don't know if I can. No matter what the police found, you were involved in that shooting, Valerie. You wrote those names on that list. You wrote my name on that list. You had a good life here. You might not have pulled the trigger, but you helped cause the tragedy.\" He opened the door.\"I'm sorry. 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