--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If this was a dick measuring contest, I…" description: "\"“If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself thinking numbly, then I was Pee Wee and she was John Holmes.”\" — Jeaniene Frost" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png" --- # If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself… ![“If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself thinking numbly, then I was Pee Wee and she was John Holmes.” quote by Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png) > ““If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself thinking numbly, then I was Pee Wee and she was John Holmes.”” [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A humorous, self‑deprecating comparison of sexual performance, using famous adult film stars as benchmarks. **In simple terms:** A funny way to say I felt inadequate. Key Takeaway Don’t take sexual confidence too seriously. Themes humor sexuality insecurity Mood playful self‑aware Type humorous candid When to use this quote - dating - sexual encounters - personal reflection Key Concepts comparative metaphor self‑deprecation Questions to Reflect On - How do you handle feelings of inadequacy? - What healthier comparisons could you make? A Different Perspective May reinforce harmful stereotypes about body image. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Pee Wee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pee-wee/) ## Related quotes > [“These pens are unusually thick and heavy. You know, phallic imagery and all that. The bigger the, um, pen, the bigger the… well, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nick-stephenson/these-pens-are-unusually-thick-and-heavy-you-know-phallic-imagery-and/) [Nick Stephenson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nick-stephenson/) > [“I can't take a dick-measuring contest." . . . "I know Meshack has a big one. And from what I've felt, Zulu is big.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kenya-wright/i-can-t-take-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-know-meshack-has-a-big-one/) [Kenya Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kenya-wright/) > [“The dramatic interplay was more in Lester’s wheelhouse, particularly the scene where Billy Bob contemplates suicide. Wracked with guilt over disappointing his coach (and,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/billy-bob-s-blues/the-dramatic-interplay-was-more-in-lester-s-wheelhouse-particularly/) Billy Bob's Blues > [I remember my first practice, from Pee Wee football when I was, like, 10, and I didn't know what was going on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-amendola/i-remember-my-first-practice-from-pee-wee-football-when-i-was-like-10/) [Danny Amendola](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danny-amendola/) > [“Whenever the sixth tune on the flip side of the LP, “Atlanta Blues,” began, she would grab one of Tengo’s body parts and praise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/haruki-murakami/whenever-the-sixth-tune-on-the-flip-side-of-the-lp-atlanta-blues/) [Haruki Murakami](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/haruki-murakami/) > [The old Dodgers were something special, but of my teammates overall, there was nobody like Pee Wee Reese for me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jackie-robinson/the-old-dodgers-were-something-special-but-of-my-teammates-overall/) [Jackie Robinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jackie-robinson/) > [When we played the Dodgers in St. Louis, they had to come through our dugout, and our bat rack was right there where they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stan-musial/when-we-played-the-dodgers-in-st-louis-they-had-to-come-through-our/) [Stan Musial](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stan-musial/) > [“My mashed potatoes come with a masturbation sound you pour on top, like gravy. I got the recipe from Pee Wee Herman.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/my-mashed-potatoes-come-with-a-masturbation-sound-you-pour-on-top/) [Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/) > [If you fumble, you can't play. I know that, man - ever since pee wee. If you're fumbling, you're not going to play.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-ingram-ii/if-you-fumble-you-can-t-play-i-know-that-man-ever-since-pee-wee-if/) [Mark Ingram II](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-ingram-ii/) > [Everything about 'Adventure Time' is the purest form of kid's play. A kid does not live in the Land of Ooo. That is one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fred-seibert/everything-about-adventure-time-is-the-purest-form-of-kid-s-play-a/) [Fred Seibert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fred-seibert/) > [You want to get something changed, you send sport. Look what happened when Pee Wee Reese puts his arm around Jackie Robinson. That did…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-layfield/you-want-to-get-something-changed-you-send-sport-look-what-happened/) [John Layfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-layfield/) > [“Handing Pee Wee to her sister, she admonished her not to stop. "And be careful! Should sperm come shooting out, never let it enter…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicholas-chong/handing-pee-wee-to-her-sister-she-admonished-her-not-to-stop-and-be/) [Nicholas Chong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicholas-chong/) > [The jewels is flirting me, damned if I'm hurting. Legend in two games like I'm Pee Wee Kirkland.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pusha-t-clipse/the-jewels-is-flirting-me-damned-if-i-m-hurting-legend-in-two-games/) [Pusha T (Clipse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pusha-t-clipse/) > [“Weetzie and My Secret Agent Lover Man and Dirk and Duck and Cherokee and Witch Baby and Slinkster Dog and Go-Go Girl and the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francesca-lia-block/weetzie-and-my-secret-agent-lover-man-and-dirk-and-duck-and-cherokee/) [Francesca Lia Block](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francesca-lia-block/) > [Aye girl, you hungry? How bout some Dick-fil-A?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kingsley/aye-girl-you-hungry-how-bout-some-dick-fil-a/) [Kingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kingsley/) ## More by Jeaniene Frost > [Or for the gorgeously bare vampire to give her a sensual massage while feeding her peeled grapes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/or-for-the-gorgeously-bare-vampire-to-give-her-a-sensual-massage/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“Stop it,” Adrian ordered, his strange accent thicker with his vehemence. “I promise, I’m not going to hurt you!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/stop-it-adrian-ordered-his-strange-accent-thicker-with-his-vehemence/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“All right, you deadly little ghostlings,” I muttered. “Mama says go back to bed! - Cat”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/all-right-you-deadly-little-ghostlings-i-muttered-mama-says-go-back/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [I’m in, Cat. I’d never leave you. Especially when you’ve got death breathing down your neck.” “Very funny,” I retorted, since Bones was inches…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/i-m-in-cat-i-d-never-leave-you-especially-when-you-ve-got-death/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“I remember hearing you scream, Cat, and seeing your face. But I don’t remember dying. And how can I go on if I’m dead?”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/i-remember-hearing-you-scream-cat-and-seeing-your-face-but-i-don-t/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [Cat cleared her throat in the tense silence that followed. “Uh, before this goes any further, let’s at least introduce ourselves to your friend.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/cat-cleared-her-throat-in-the-tense-silence-that-followed-uh-before/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“I went over to the narrow closet and picked out another outfit, glancing behind me to make sure Bones had shut the door before…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/i-went-over-to-the-narrow-closet-and-picked-out-another-outfit/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [You can run from the grave, but you can't hide.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/you-can-run-from-the-grave-but-you-can-t-hide/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [Wouldn’t that make a charming epitaph? Here lies Cat. Killed not by fang, but Ferragamos.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/wouldn-t-that-make-a-charming-epitaph-here-lies-cat-killed-not-by/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“I was too shocked to respond, but Bones's laughter broke the silence. "You must be taking a piss on me." "Am I expected to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/i-was-too-shocked-to-respond-but-bones-s-laughter-broke-the-silence/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [The paranormal bad boy is usually a fiercely loyal partner for the heroine. Once his sights are set on her, he doesn't notice other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/the-paranormal-bad-boy-is-usually-a-fiercely-loyal-partner-for-the/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“A shrug. “I wasn’t sent to you until now.” “Are you serious?” Incredulity sharpened my tone. “Is your boss in a bad mood, or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/a-shrug-i-wasn-t-sent-to-you-until-now-are-you-serious-incredulity/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [I'm sorry I can't give you the normal life you wanted, but I promise to adore you every day for the rest of your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/i-m-sorry-i-can-t-give-you-the-normal-life-you-wanted-but-i-promise/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [You can hear my dreams? God, you must never get any quiet. I'd be shooting myself in the head if I were you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/you-can-hear-my-dreams-god-you-must-never-get-any-quiet-i-d-be/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) > [“As the saying goes, today isn’t your day and tomorrow doesn’t look good, either.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/as-the-saying-goes-today-isn-t-your-day-and-tomorrow-doesn-t-look/) [Jeaniene Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) [Explore all 647 Jeaniene Frost quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/) ## More Dick quotes > [Aye girl, you hungry? How bout some Dick-fil-A?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kingsley/aye-girl-you-hungry-how-bout-some-dick-fil-a/) [Kingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kingsley/) > [U aint never seen a long dick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-hart/u-aint-never-seen-a-long-dick/) [Kevin Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-hart/) > [“You broke up with me, and I spend one night with one guy who turns out to be the reason I’m even here, in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tere-michaels/you-broke-up-with-me-and-i-spend-one-night-with-one-guy-who-turns-out/) [Tere Michaels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tere-michaels/) > [“I told you. I'm always hard for you, I'm just good at hiding it. Which, actually, isn't easy when your dick is the size…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karina-halle/i-told-you-i-m-always-hard-for-you-i-m-just-good-at-hiding-it-which/) [Karina Halle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karina-halle/) > [You looking for a dick punch?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hank-moody/you-looking-for-a-dick-punch/) [Hank Moody](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hank-moody/) > [“His cock was beautiful. He had low hanging balls. His dick, which was long like the rest of him, was standing proud. The skin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-cox/his-cock-was-beautiful-he-had-low-hanging-balls-his-dick-which-was/) [James Cox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-cox/) > [“I hope your dick gets whore poisoning and shrivels to its death! And then I hope all the girls see it and laugh at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-mclean/i-hope-your-dick-gets-whore-poisoning-and-shrivels-to-its-death-and/) [Jay McLean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-mclean/) > [What up haters I'm back so how's my dick taste.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sammy-adams/what-up-haters-i-m-back-so-how-s-my-dick-taste/) [Sammy Adams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sammy-adams/) > [“Be true to your Dick.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vladimir-nabokov/be-true-to-your-dick/) [Vladimir Nabokov](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vladimir-nabokov/) > [Damn I'm on my own dick/ i dont see nobody blinded by my own shit/ i dont need nobody, I'm grindin out in my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kr/damn-i-m-on-my-own-dick-i-dont-see-nobody-blinded-by-my-own-shit-i/) KR > [If I had a dick I would pull it out and piss on em .](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicki-minaj/if-i-had-a-dick-i-would-pull-it-out-and-piss-on-em/) [Nicki Minaj](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicki-minaj/) > [“It being the first time in his life that he had touched female fingers under water, Dick duly registered the sensation as rather a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/it-being-the-first-time-in-his-life-that-he-had-touched-female/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“You could take the entirety of the common sense of humans and put it in the palm of your hand and still have room…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-carson/you-could-take-the-entirety-of-the-common-sense-of-humans-and-put-it/) [Anne Carson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-carson/) > [“We're testing each other. Seeing how far we can take this before something snaps. Most likely my dick.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-mclean/we-re-testing-each-other-seeing-how-far-we-can-take-this-before/) [Jay McLean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-mclean/) > [“I thought you seemed a lot nicer lately. Dick will do that. Thank god, too, because you’re usually one mood swing away from snapping…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ebony-brewer/i-thought-you-seemed-a-lot-nicer-lately-dick-will-do-that-thank-god/) Ebony Brewer Browse all 475 Dick quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself thinking numbly, then I was Pee Wee and she was John Holmes.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jeaniene Frost" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-found-myself-thinking-numbly/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Dick" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-found-myself-thinking-numbly/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e31/jeaniene-frost-335_dick_if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-f_198831.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If this was a dick measuring contest, I found myself thinking numbly, then I was Pee Wee and she was John…” — Jeaniene Frost", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Jeaniene Frost", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeaniene-frost/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“If this was a dick measuring...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-found-myself-thinking-numbly/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeaniene-frost/if-this-was-a-dick-measuring-contest-i-found-myself-thinking-numbly/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```